


Full Circle - Beth's Story

by Galaxy451



Category: Moonlight (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-29
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-02-23 04:22:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 123,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2534021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galaxy451/pseuds/Galaxy451
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In Beth Turner's own words, this is the story of events leading up to her turning, what happened after, and the strange turn of events that takes her back to where it all started, with an unexpected twist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One Door Closes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: This chapter PG-13/R (overall NC-17)
> 
> This is my first fan fiction, so I apologise in advance if it's a little shaky. Hopefully I will improve with practise! I'm also not great at rating the content, hence the PG-13/R rating!
> 
> This story takes place where the final episode left off.

I put my signature to the last of the documents I have to sign, tuck them back into the brown manilla folder, and with a sigh, place it on the desk. I lean back in the chair, closing my eyes for a moment, only to open them a second later as the painful memories that suddenly arise threaten to overwhelm me. Best to keep busy I tell myself.

Well anyway… might as well get on with it. I’m here to tell you my story, so I’ll begin by introducing myself. My name is Jacqueline Kostan. I’m 32 years old, blonde, and a P.I.. Oh, and incidentally…… I’m also a vampire.

Of course that wasn’t always my name… no, I started out as Beth Turner, back in the days before I was turned that was. A lot of water has passed under the bridge since then, and I’m not sure I’d even recognise myself from the innocent young woman I was barely six short years ago. It feels like a lifetime has gone by since I worked as an investigative reporter at Buzzwire. Since I discovered that the world wasn’t the simple place I’d always thought it was; since I learned that vampires walked among us, and since I fell in love with one of those vampires, and my life changed forever.

It all started with Mick St. John…… oh God…..even just saying his name brings a smile to my lips. He came into my life and changed everything. For the first time in my life, I fell wildly, truly, madly in love, with a passion I’d never before experienced. Loving him was like a fever; it burned me up, but it felt so wonderful I wouldn’t have changed it for anything. Yes.. Mick St. John….. that’s where my story begins…..

It happened the day I decided that I just couldn’t do it anymore… that is, carry on trying to make things work as a human in a relationship with a vampire. He’d told me over and over that human and vampire relationships couldn’t last , our worlds were too different, it was too complicated, not to mention the immortality, or lack of it, part. I didn’t care though. Never in all my life had I met anyone like Mick St. John. I’d fallen for him heart, body and soul, and I wasn‘t going to take no for an answer.

That is… until the Emma and Jackson incident. That was when I realised I was never going to be fully a part of Mick’s world. He had shut me out of what was not “my business”. That hurt, to think he didn’t trust me, or care enough about me to share it with me. And when he finally told me how Emma had been executed for a mistake that put their community in danger, and that Jackson had chosen to die with her rather than go on alone, it just confirmed for me that Mick had been right all along. Our worlds were too different. Could I live with that kind of justice? Would Mick ever let me be a part of his life, with all that that entailed? Sadly, it seemed not. I was tired, so tired of trying.

I think back to that night when Mick came to see me, and I can still remember it as clearly as if were yesterday. When I told him “I don’t think I can do this anymore”, he had waited a heartbeat, then turned on his heel and walked straight out. I was dumbfounded. Fighting back the tears as I went to shut the door, choked up with the pain that his abrupt departure had left. I hadn’t expected him just to leave like that, and the empty space was suddenly terrible and felt very, very final. This was it, he was gone from my life for good. Utterly desolate, all I could manage was to lean my head against the wall , close my eyes, and give myself up to the tears already coursing down my face.

I don’t know how long I stood there like that, my heart breaking into pieces for all that I had just lost, when suddenly there was a knocking on the door. My eyes flew open as my head jerked up, and all I could was think was “please let it be Mick”, but I was frozen to the spot, unable to move and face the possibility that it might not be him. The knocking came again, and seconds later the door burst open. I knew it was Mick, even though I didn’t turn around. My heart was hammering so hard I could barely breathe.

“You want to know what Emma and Jackson made me realise…?” he paused as I waited with baited breath for what he was going to say, “…that you were right, you were right all along. This isn’t about being a vampire, or a human. This is about us, and how we feel about one another. Right here. Right now.”

A sudden spark of hope suddenly flipped my stomach over, and Emma’s words when she told me about her and Jackson first meeting, came back to me. “The night that we first met, or met again, whatever…. what was I wearing?”

He hesitated for only a second, “Blue jeans, white striped shirt, cream jacket.”

My heart was in my mouth as I spun around. “What about my shoes?”

He looked at me so tenderly then, and I let myself hope, for the first time, that this might be what I’d dreamed of for so long.

“You were barefoot,” he smiled.

I was actually amazed he could remember. “How can you remember that?”

Seconds passed as we just stared at each other, then I almost saw him make the decision.

“Because I love you,” he said simply.

Oh my God….. He’d said it. Said the words I’d been longing to hear for months now. I stood there for a few moments, not quite believing I’d heard right. Had he really just told me he loved me?

He was looking back at me with such an raw expression on his face, and all I could think was that I needed to put him out of his misery. I took a step forward and reached up to touch my lips to his, sensation exploding around me as I felt his mouth claim mine. His hand caught in my hair as he bent to deepen the kiss, and my arm snaked up around his neck, instinctively pulling him closer. A jolt of pure electricity shot through me as I felt the touch of his tongue against my lips, and reflexively my mouth opened under his. Something tightened low in my abdomen as our tongues intertwined, and I hardly noticed as he reached out to push the door closed behind us.

Nothing else mattered, except that I loved him too.

 

______

To be continued…..


	2. Not a good time!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: NC-17 (ish) R ? (I'm rubbish at this rating thing....)
> 
> Here goes with the second installment. Hope you enjoy!

*Jacqui Kostan's Office 2014*

My skin suddenly prickles, and I get up to adjust the blinds. The late afternoon sun is low in the sky and throwing strands of light in patterns across the floor. Once I would have welcomed the warmth on my face, and luxuriated in the feel of sunlight on my skin; now, with a frown, I angle the blind to deflect the rays.

Sitting back down in the now dimmer office, I stare at the painting on the far wall, but that’s not what I’m seeing. In my mind’s eye I’m seeing Mick’s face as he told me he loved me back that night. His beautiful face is something I shall never forget as long as I live.

I smile to myself as I remember the events of that evening….. it’s amusing now, but back then I didn’t find it so funny. No, that night really didn’t turn out like I would have imagined…

********************

*Beth's apartment 2008*

I heard the door click shut, and all I was aware of was Mick’s mouth on mine, his arms around me, and how right it all felt. Like coming home. For long moments we stood there, totally lost in each other, mouths locked together, bodies pressing into one another with a growing need. My stomach was clenching deliciously, little waves of pleasure beginning to radiate through me at the feel of his hands moving under my robe. I searched his mouth, tentatively running my tongue over his teeth, wondering what it would feel like to touch his fangs if he vamped out. He must have noticed, because he drew back slightly, gazing at me for a moment, and all of a sudden his eyes began to fade to silver and my heart started hammering in my chest as I saw his fangs appear. They say you should be careful what you wish for, and I could do nothing but gaze back at him, unsure of how to proceed at this new development. I’d wanted to know what this would be like, and now I could only stare like a rabbit caught in headlights.

His eyes never leaving mine, he very slowly lowered his head until our lips touched, so very gently. He kissed me so softly and tenderly, and, barely breathing, I began to return his kiss, hesitantly at first, then more confidently. My hands went to his hips, drawing him closer, pressing him to me and unconsciously grinding myself against him. The sudden and unexpected feel of the length of him against me almost made my knees buckle. It felt so good, and, unable to help myself, I moaned into his mouth, my body reacting automatically when I heard his answering groan. I wanted him so much; all of him, right then and there. His arms tightened around me then, as he deepened the kiss, and I opened up to him, feeling the sharp points of his fangs as I began to explore his mouth once more.

Our mouths still locked together, he moved his hands up to my shoulders, gently pushing my robe off. I felt it slide down my arms and onto the floor, as his hands began to work their way up inside my camisole. I reached up then, slipping my hands under his jacket and shrugging it over his shoulders before turning my attention to his shirt. It was only as I felt his fingers start to ease under the waistband of my pyjama bottoms that I came to my senses with a jolt, breaking off our kiss a suddenness borne out of sheer panic.

“Uhhh…” was all I could manage.

Mick’s face was full of concern as he collected himself, asking “Are you okay? Did I nick you?” 

Staring at him, mortified, I watched his eyes bleed back to their normal hazel as his fangs retracted. He was visibly gathering himself, and raised his hand, brushing his thumb quickly across him mouth in a typically Mick gesture of embarrassment. I felt terrible for causing this abrupt awkward moment.

“No… no I’m fine” I stumbled over my words, looking away self consciously. “It’s just not a good time.”

A confused look on his face, he shuffled from one foot to the other, . “Not a good time?”

Right then would have been a good time for the floor to open up and swallow me. For goodness sakes, the man could sniff out past, present and future at a murder scene, surely he must have had a clue what I was talking about?

Apparently not, as he continued to look at me, eyebrows raised in a questioning look. I was blushing to the roots of my hair by this time, when suddenly, thankfully, he got it.

“Oh! Not a good time?” He nodded his head in understanding, his hands going to rest on his hips. He shuffled a bit more, turning his head aside as he gave an uneasy smile.

“Time of the month” I said, flashing him my best smile in an attempt to lighten the mood. Then I promptly spoiled it all by bursting into tears, looking forlornly at him, and trying desperately to choke back the sobs that arose up out of nowhere.

“Oh Beth..” he said, coming forward to wrap me in his arms, gently rocking me as he stoked my hair over and over. “Look, it’s fine. I really wasn’t in the mood anyway.”

That made me laugh, and I hugged him tight, laughing even as the tears were sliding down my face. He reached down, and I felt his arms go underneath me as he scooped me up, pulling me tight against his chest and kissing me tenderly. 

“Where are we going?” I asked, momentarily panicked again.

“Don’t worry, just the couch.” he said, walking over and sitting down with me still in his arms, so I ended up in his lap, cuddled against him. “I’ve never had anyone cry because they couldn’t make love to me before. It’s kind of flattering.” He was grinning at me now, teasing.

“Don’t let it go to your head” I said, smiling despite myself, “it’s just hormones.”

“Sex is highly overrated anyway.“ he murmured, brushing the tears from my eyes with his thumb, before leaning in and giving me a very slow, gentle, and thorough kiss. 

Reluctantly needing to come up for air, I broke the kiss. “This is so not how I imagined our first time together” I sniffled..

“You imagined our first time?” He grinned from ear to ear.

“Well, no, I mean, if I had imagined it, which I havn’t…..” he smiled at that, “then that wouldn’t have been how it ended.”

The smile faded from his lips. “It hasn‘t ended Beth." His hand was in my hair caressing my temple over and over as he whispered, "I love you so much…..”

I looked at him, my hand reaching out to touch the side of his face, my voice barely above a whisper.

“I love you too.”

 

______

To be continued…..


	3. An Urgent Message

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: This chapter - PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Here goes with the next installment!
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 3

We spent the rest of the evening talking into the small hours, filling each other in on the small insignificant details of our lives, from childhood memories to teenage angst, and everything in between. I was fascinated to hear about Mick’s early years, growing up in the 1920s and 30s. It seemed strange to hear him talk about things I’d only ever heard from the mouths of old people, when he barely looks older than I do. He didn’t talk much about the war, preferring to keep to happier topics, but he told me all about how he came to came to be in a band with several of his former army buddies, his love for music, and how he still very much missed that part of his life.

I told him about the music I loved as a teenager, my first crushes, how I got interested in journalism, and he listened with interest, laughing out loud at my “Goth” vampire wanna-be phase. “No such thing as vampires” he chuckled. He tilted my chin, studying me, “I can’t imagine you as a Goth.”

“Trust me, it wasn’t pretty, but at least it didn’t last long” I replied, thanking goodness it appeared he’d missed that embarrassing stage of my youth.

Finally, when my eyes began to droop, and the sky began to lighten outside, he apologised for keeping me up all night - like I would have had it any other way! - kissed me goodbye, and made ready to leave, promising to call me later in the afternoon. Then he took hold of my hand, raising it to his lips and placing a gentle kiss against my fingers.

Reluctantly letting go of his hand I leaned against the door frame, watching him, still facing me, as he backed around the corner, smiling a last goodbye as he went. Only then did I step back into my apartment and close the door softly behind me...

 

I come back to myself like waking from a dream, my eyes adjusting quickly to the now dark office. I get up and walk over to the window, drawing the blinds fully back now that it’s dark, enjoying the light from the newly risen moon, now hanging low in the sky, a huge orange orb, fat and swollen on the night horizon. There might have been a lot of disadvantages to being a vampire, but enhanced night sight was not one of them. I see everything in sharp detail, small movements catching my eye, and the colours….. that was the biggest surprise of them all. Seeing colours in the dark for the first time had astounded and amazed me. The first time I opened my eyes after being turned, I was bombarded with a myriad dazzling colours, all appearing to shimmer and shine with a vivacity and sparkle I had never thought possible. Overwhelming in the daytime – I had soon learned the value of a quality pair of sunglasses - at night, our superior vision literally made night seem like day.

I stand at the window for a long time, gazing at the moon, and letting thoughts of today run through my head. I know I’m in still in shock, so much has transpired in the space of a few short days, and I’m struggling to cope with the emotional overload of it all.

Thoughts of Josef trickle into my mind then, and I quickly push them away before I can succumb to the pain that thinking of him brings.

Briskly turning from the window, I make my way back over to the desk and flick the switch on my computer. I havn’t checked my e-mail for over a week, and now seems as good a time as any. I start to trawl through the numerous messages, most of it junk mail that I delete without a glance, but one catches my attention. It’s from Helena, Josef’s PA, dated three days ago, and it’s simply entitled “Call Me – Urgent”. A phone number is listed in the body of the e-mail, but that’s all, no other indication of what it’s concerning.

Punching in the number on my office phone, I listen to it ring, impatiently tapping my pen on the desk. Five times it rings, before switching over to voicemail, and I leave a short message. “Hey Helena, it’s Jacqui. I just got your message; call me back as soon as you can please.”, before disconnecting the call. Wondering if she had tried to reach me on my cell phone, I delve into my purse and check my calls. Sure enough there are four missed calls all from Helena, received over the past 4 days. Damn! My phone has been switched off for nearly a week. 

I try her at the number listed on my cell, but it goes straight to voicemail without even ringing. I leave another message, thoughtfully placing the phone back in my purse, wondering what it could be that she might want to speak to me about so urgently. 

As I ponder the odd message, I catch sight of the photograph on my desk, and my thoughts float back to Mick St. John, and those heady first days when we first began our relationship proper...

 

The phonecall had come right when he said it would. I practically dived at it in an as uncool a display of eagerness as I think I’ve ever exhibited. Just as well he wasn’t there to see it.

We made arrangements for dinner at my favourite restaurant. The meal was excellent, but it saddened me that Mick couldn’t share in the experience, although he assured me he got pleasure out of just watching me eat. We shared a bottle of wine, and I was glad that at least that was one luxury he hadn’t had to give up. Afterward, he drove us to the beach, and we sat on the sand, me cuddled up against him with his coat around my shoulders, and his arms hugging me tight. We listened to the sound of the waves lapping at the shore, and watched the moonlight playing on the water; simply enjoying each other’s company.

“I think the beach is even more beautiful at night”, I said, “if a bit cold.” as I snuggled deeper into the crook of Mick’s arm.

He was silent for a few moments, I guess thinking back to the brief time he spent as a mortal, and the fleeting moments we had not so long ago shared on this very same stretch of beach, before he had given up his mortality to save me.

“Yes, it is.” he nodded, smiling a crooked, and somewhat sad, smile.

I squeezed his hand, and he hugged me tighter to him. 

 

In the days that followed we were both kept pretty busy with work, me at the D.A.’s office and Mick following a lead that had come up on a case he’d been working on involving a missing girl. We set a date for Friday night. Mick had invited Josef and Simone over as well, and was planning on cooking a meal for Simone and I. When I expressed some doubt at the idea of vampire catering , he assured me that his culinary skills, although slightly rusty from disuse, were up to the task, and not to worry about a thing.

Friday afternoon I managed to sneak a couple of hours away from my desk, on the pretence of some investigative research on a couple of names I’d been looking into. Ben had me working on a special project that he wasn’t telling me much about, but which I was determined to get to the bottom of, my curious nature unable to endure being kept in the dark for long.

The lingerie store was my first stop, where I managed to pick up a couple of sets of matching bra and panties that I hoped looked sufficiently alluring, but at the same time, not too indecent. I then trawled just about every boutique in the vicinity in search of the perfect dress, and ended up making a mad dash back to the first store I went into, only to buy the first dress I tried on. A simple, black, lace trimmed jersey dress, it hugged my hips and clung in all the right places. I stashed my purchases in the car before hastening back to my desk to finish typing up my report.

When I was finally able to extricate myself from the office, I hurried home with my new purchases, and rushed to get ready. Praying that nothing was going to go wrong this time, at last I stood in front of the mirror, fussing with my hair and making some last minute adjustments before heading out.

______

To be continued…..


	4. A Dinner Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: This chapter - R (I think????) (overall NC-17)
> 
> Here goes with the next installment!
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 4

I arrived at 7:30pm on the dot, and Josef answered the door with a flourish.

“Hi Beth” he grinned, gesturing for me to enter, looking me up and down with rather too much interest until I began to feel vaguely uneasy. Feeling my face start to colour but determined not to let Josef know he was making me nervous, I smiled politely, and what I hoped was confidently, back, “Hi Josef.”

“Nice dress” he said, giving me a wicked smile, and ushering me inside.

“Thanks, you don’t look half bad yourself” I countered, looking him over with what I hoped was an equally blatant stare, and congratulating myself when he raised his hand nervously to his hair and had to look away.

Grinning once his back was turned, I followed him inside, immediately starting to feel hungry at the smell of delicious cooking in the air. Simone was in the kitchen with Mick, and I made my way over to say hi, smiling at the sight of Mick in a blue striped apron, dish cloth thrown over one shoulder, surrounded by pots and pans. The food looked delicious, and I suddenly saw Mick in a different light, relaxed and laughing, in a way I’d never seen him before, as Simone tasted the sauce and advised him on the seasoning.

Feeling slightly jealous all of a sudden, I hung back, wanting nothing more than to go to him and wrap my arms around him, but uncertain in this new situation, and deciding to leave it until he’d got his hand less full.

Turning around and catching sight of me he gave me a shy, slightly crooked smile, dropping the pan he was holding into the sink and coming over, leaning in to give me a quick kiss on the mouth. Just a quick brush of lips, but even so, I felt my stomach jerk in response, and an involuntary sigh escaped before I even knew I‘d done it. “Hey” I smiled back, blushing.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Simone and Josef exchange a quick glance, and I wondered what Mick might have been telling Josef about our newfound relationship status. I knew they’d been friends a long time, and guessed there wasn’t much they kept from each other. Josef probably knew exactly what had transpired the other night, and knowing how close he and Simone were, I suspected she probably knew too, but hey, they were friends I told myself, and what did I have to feel embarrassed about?

Taking a deep breath and making an effort to calm myself and relax, I went over to greet Simone, admiring her dress, a gorgeous pale green taffeta that looked absolutely stunning on her, and exchanging those little air kisses that girls do when in polite company.

“You look stunning”, she said, looking appreciatively at my dress, and then, leaning in to whisper against my hair, “Mick is going to love you in that dress.”

“Thanks”, I blushed, wondering if the whole world knew about the goings on between Mick and I. “Is there anything I can do to help? ” I asked, in an attempt to divert the topic of conversation.

“I think we can leave the boys to it”, she smiled, taking my arm and leading me into the lounge area, “we’re under strict instructions to sit back and enjoy tonight, they assure me they have it all under control.”

We settled ourselves down on the couch, and Josef arrived in full waiter mode, bearing a glass of wine, and placing it in my hand with a small bow, which I couldn’t help smiling at, before heading off back to the kitchen to help Mick with the preparations.

“Wow, we’re getting the full treatment tonight” I said, smiling appreciatively.

“Yup, under full instructions not to raise a finger” she grinned.

“So…”, she looked at me conspiratorially as soon as Josef was out of earshot, “have you two sealed the deal yet?”

Grateful that my secret was safe, but not sure I was ready to discuss this quite yet I hedged “Ah… we managed to sort out our differences. We’re just going to take it one day at a time”.

Taking in the situation immediately she leaned forward, whispering “So you havn’t slept together yet then?”

“Ah.. no, not yet.” I muttered under my breath, wondering how it was so obvious, and wishing the topic of conversation hadn’t turned quite so quickly to mine and Mick’s love life.

“It’s OK”, she said, touching my arm in a gesture of female empathy, “you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but if there’s anything you want to ask.. you know… about it, “ she paused for emphasis, “then you know you can ask me anything you need to know.”

Blushing again, and darting a glance over at Mick and Josef busying themselves with the plates and cutlery, I took a gulp of wine, nodding.. “Thanks Simone, I appreciate it.”

To my huge relief, our conversation moved on to more mundane matters, and we were soon laughing and joking about our thoughts on the impending meal, and wondering what delights Mick and Josef were rustling up in the kitchen. Mick had prepared food for me before, so I had some idea of what he was capable of, but tonight’s meal was something special, and Simone wasn’t at all convinced that Josef had the slightest idea what he was doing in the gourmet meal department. “Let’s just hope we don’t leave here tonight with food poisoning”, she joked.

As it turned out, the food was mouth-wateringly good, both Simone and I pleasantly surprised by our capable hosts. Luckily, Josef seemed to have been designated as the waiter for the evening, leaving the culinary skills to Mick, who, I was proud to note, did an excellent job, better than anything I could have managed myself. Nursing their frosted glasses of A-positive with a whiskey chaser, they watched appreciatively as Simone and I tucked into a dessert of crème brulée, which was absolutely divine, and I had to wonder where on earth Mick had picked up such skills. Turned out he had spent a year working in the catering industry not long after the war ended, and I wondered at how little I knew about his past life, and how much someone who had lived as long as Mick had, must have experienced.

Finally, the dishes were cleared away, and I had to laugh as I watched Josef struggling to load the dishwasher, stubbornly refusing any help, although I did offer. His duties completed, Mick collapsed on the couch next to me, putting his feet up on the coffee table and stretching out, a small smile playing on his lips, and looking at me coyly with one eyebrow raised, amused at my incredulity at his gastronomic prowess. “You didn’t think I could do it did you?” he grinned, altogether too pleased with himself, and I couldn’t help but smile at how happy he was. I‘d never seen him so relaxed and content, and in answer to his question, I reached out my hand to take his and give it a gentle squeeze. “It was wonderful Mick, thank you”.

We stayed like that, holding hands, just looking at each other and sharing the happy moment together, until a gentle cough raised us from our reverie, and we looked up to see Josef standing over us, coat in hand and Simone in tow. “Well… it’s late. I think it’s time Simone and I got going and left you two lovebirds to .. er…. ” his voice trailed off … “tidy up”, he finished, trying not to smirk.

I just grinned, too happy right at that moment to take offense at Josef’s innuendo, and we got up to see them both to the door.

Having said our goodbyes and waved them off, Mick closed the door and turned to face me. 

“That went well I think.”

“I certainly enjoyed it”, I smiled, “and I know Simone did.. you‘re a wonderful cook Mick.”

“Thanks,” he said, suddenly looking a bit embarrassed. “So… er…” Mick shuffled slightly, “another glass of wine?” 

“No thank you, I‘ve had quite enough already tonight I think.”

“Anything else I can get you?” he asked, shifting uneasily, his hand going behind his head in a nervous gesture.

I shook my head, and took a deep breath. How did it suddenly get this awkward I wondered? One minute we were fine, and the next like a pair of gauche teenagers. It was now or never, and now definitely sounded better than never. Determined this was not going to be the end of the evening just yet, I took a step toward him and placed my hands squarely about his waist, reaching up to brush a soft kiss against his mouth. Initially taken by surprise, he returned the kiss somewhat hesitantly, and my stomach dropped, thinking I’d just blown it by coming on too strong. Then thankfully, he gradually began kissing me back, gently at first, then little by little becoming bolder as he traced along my lips, teasing me until I felt myself start to grow weak at the knees. 

When I felt the touch of his tongue nudging gently against my lips, I opened my mouth slightly to allow him entry, and felt his hands come up to cup my face as he tentatively began to explore me, tasting, licking, and then when I didn’t think I could take anymore, pressing his mouth to mine and kissing me like he wanted to climb inside my body. His hands moved down, skimming the sides of my breasts lightly and causing me to take a sharp intake of breath, before finally coming to rest about my waist. Urgently, I slid my arms around Mick’s back, grabbing handfuls of his shirt and beginning to tug it roughly out of his jeans, feeling his arms tighten around me in response as he pressed our bodies closer together. His hands came around to cup my rear, pulling me against him, and suddenly aware of him pressed firm and hard into me, I felt my stomach clench with a sudden aching need to have him inside of me.

He was raining kissing down my neck and along my throat, and desperate to touch him, to feel his bare skin under my hands, I slid my hands up under his shirt, caressing up and over his hard muscled back and back down again to his waist. His mouth found mine again, capturing it in an urgent kiss, which I returned with equal enthusiasm. Wanting more, my fingers crept down to play along the waistband of his jeans, and as my hand reached for his belt buckle he let out a groan, breaking our kiss, and sweeping me up into his arms in one swift movement.

My heart thundering, I lay in his arms, held tightly against him as he began to head towards the stairs, unable to help being slightly curious, since I knew he didn’t own a bed.

“We had better not be headed for the freezer, Mick St. John” I said.

He just smiled enigmatically, and headed on up…

 

______

To be continued…..


	5. Dessert

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: NC-17 
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
>  
> 
> Chapter 5

Picking up the photo and staring into those slate blue eyes at the man I had loved so very much, I still find it hard to believe he’s gone. Even now, after all this time, and after so much has come to pass, I still can’t seem to let go. 

Thinking back to that first night again, I wonder at how we ever managed to get together at all, there were so many false starts at the beginning. But finally we’d made it, and that first time together is something I will always treasure. I remember how he had carried me up those stairs, teasing me, telling me he hoped it wouldn’t be too cold for me, and warning me to make sure I didn’t fall asleep in there. When he’d flipped open the lid of his freezer, me still encased tight in his arms, and started to lower me in, I’d struggled like a wildcat and begun to yell my head off, before I noticed his mischievous grin.

“Mick St. John, don’t you dare!”, I screamed, clinging on to him for dear life.

“I always told you having a relationship with a vampire would be difficult, dangerous and complicated,” he smiled, “I just forgot to mention ‘cold’.”

My face must have been a picture, and he threw back his head, roaring with laughter. “If you could only see the look on your face Beth.”

I scowled back at him as he hoisted me back up and flipped the lid down. “That was not funny.”

“Yes it was,” he chuckled, leaning down to place a soft, lingering kiss on my lips.

Still holding me in his arms, he carried me out of the room and along the corridor, kicking open a door to reveal a room that looked like a study come dressing room. Sitting in the middle was what I could only assume must have been a king sized bed. It looked enormous, taking up most of the remaining floor space, and was made up with midnight blue duvet and matching pillows. Walking over to it, he gently set me down on my feet and touched his lips to mine in a long, slow kiss, that set me trembling with anticipation.

“Hoping to get lucky were you?” I teased, when our lips finally parted.

“Maybe”, he shrugged, putting his head on one side, and smiling at me, his face turning serious as he reached out a hand to tuck a stray wisp of hair behind my ear.

We stared at each other in silence for a long moment. I’d wanted this for so long, and I still couldn’t quite believe we were here, together, and about to take a step that there would be no going back from. Not knowing quite where to begin, I reached out with shaking hands, and concentrated on undoing the buttons on Mick’s shirt, drinking in the sight of his bare chest, and moving to touch my lips to the soft hair at the base of his throat. I felt his sharp intake of breath as I slowly eased the shirt over his shoulders and down his arms, tracing his biceps as I did so.

As the shirt fell to the floor his arms went around me, caressing slow circles up my back , while his mouth searched out the hollow of my shoulder, gently kissing along my collarbone and sending little jolts of pleasure down my spine. He reached up and gently pulled the straps of my dress down over my shoulders, his fingers searching for, and then finally finding the zipper. Turning around, I raised my hair up out of the way to give him better access to the zip, and small shocks went through me at the touch of his hands at my back, as he pulled the zipper all the way down, his mouth all the while kissing a slow trail along the back of my neck as the dress slid down my body and dropped to pool on the floor at my feet. 

I knew Mick must have seen me in a state of undress before, since he’d obviously stripped me out of my soaking dress the night I took the B.C. But my memories of that night, especially the latter part, were hazy at best, and I’d worked very hard to put those embarrassing moments out of my mind. Standing before him now, in just my bra and panties, those memories came back to haunt me. I hadn’t been wearing any underwear that night.

Still standing with my back to Mick, I felt my face colour as the memory re-surfaced. Then his arms came around me, hands tracing over my stomach and up along my breasts, caressing everywhere they touched, and I leaned back against him, throwing my head back and forgetting everything except the feel of his hands on me, and the way things tightened low in my belly at his touch. Instinctively I pressed back into him, feeling the hardness of him against me, my arms pulling his tighter around me as he explored my body. Reaching around, he found my mouth and kissed me long and deep, exploring me thoroughly with his tongue as his hands continued to stroke and caress. A shiver rose inside me, and I felt my nipples begin to harden under his touch.

Breaking the kiss and turning around, I kicked off my shoes and stepped out of the dress. His eyes looked me up and down then, finally returning to settle on my face.

“You’re beautiful Beth.” he stated.

“And you have far too many clothes on,” I replied, as smiling, I took a step towards him, reaching for his belt buckle, tugging it undone and loosening the buttons below. Moving my hands to his sides, I eased my fingers inside his waistband, and began to guide his jeans over his hips, dropping down on one knee as I lowered them down his legs and onto the floor. Mimicking my earlier action, he kicked off his boots and pushed the jeans out of the way with his foot.

 

Catching hold of me then, and pulling me to him, he unhooked my bra and let it tumble to the ground with our other clothes. I gasped as his lips found my neck and began to kiss their way down to my breast, licking and sucking, finding the nipple and rolling it under his tongue, flicking backwards and forwards, driving me to distraction, then moving on to my other breast lavishing it with more of the same, finally grazing his teeth along the nipple so that I cried out, almost insane with desire. 

Running my hands down Mick’s body, I let them slide into his silk boxers, hearing a low guttural sound escape him as I grasped hold of the material and began to ease them carefully down. Letting go of me for a moment, he helped out, taking them off and throwing them somewhere in the direction of his jeans. As he stood back up, the sight of him, hard and ready, made my knees go weak and my stomach turn to liquid.

“Oh my God….. Mick….” was all I could manage.

Frantic to have him inside me, I reached down and grasped him, feeling the skin smooth and tight under my fingers. A low sound slipped from me as his fingers brushed against me through my panties, sliding up and down over the wet cloth. The feeling was so intense I could barely breathe, closing my eyes and letting the sensations flow over me until it became too much to bear and, gasping , I had to pull away.

“Mick…..please..”, I begged

Kissing me all the while, Mick pushed me gently back onto the bed then, starting to kiss his way down my body, setting me on fire wherever his soft lips touched. I felt him ease my panties over my hips, pulling them down and slipping them over my feet to join the pile of discarded clothing on the floor. As his mouth began to move over my stomach it was too much and I touched his shoulder gently. “Mick.. I need you inside me. Now.”

As he moved up I rolled us over so Mick was underneath, and straddled him, my knees to either side, pinning him. I leaned over, my hair falling like a curtain to either side of his face, kissing him ever so gently on one corner of his mouth, then the other. I could feel him under me, and with one small movement I positioned us so the tip of him was against me. Eyes locked with Mick’s, I pushed myself down, inch by delicious inch, until at last he was fully sheathed inside me. The look on Mick’s face as I watched him, was something between wonder and bliss, and I loved him so much in that moment.

As I began to move, he stopped me, catching both my hands in his to get my attention.

“Beth….” he started, looking at me intently, “this is probably a really bad time to be telling you this… but I’m most likely going to vamp out at some point,” he paused for a second, “…..and want to…..bite…..”

His anxious gaze flicked back and forth between my eyes as he waited for my response, and I couldn’t help but find it amusing that he’d waited until this point to tell me.  
“I know… and it’s fine Mick.” I replied, seeing him visibly relax. “Just try not to kill me..”

“I’ll try,” he grinned.

Then, smiling, I leaned down until my mouth was right against his ear and whispered, “I know it’s probably a bad time to be mentioning this too, but if I suddenly go all furry and start howling at the moon… don’t worry about it…”

He laughed out loud at that, and I smiled at him teasingly, “You think I’m joking..”

“It’s not even full moon,” he snickered, pulling me down for a kiss, but it broke the ice, and as we slowly began to move together, I felt so at ease, as though we had known each other for ever. Mick thrust upwards to meet my rhythm, and lacing the fingers of one hand with mine, he used the other to stroke over the most sensitive part of me, licking his finger to moisten it as he slid it back and forth. Gradually I began to feel the beginnings of something large start to blossom deep within me, and I started to pant, knowing my orgasm wasn’t far away. I could tell by Mick’s reactions that he wasn’t far off either, when suddenly he pulled me down to him, burying his face in my neck, and I could hear his ragged breathing as our movements became more frantic.

“Beth……” was all he said, and I felt, more than saw, him vamp out, a low growl escaping him as I felt his fangs graze against my neck.

I pulled back slightly and he turned to look at me, a look of potent hunger on his face, his eyes glazed silver, the pupils contracted to pinpoints of white. I’d be a liar if I said I wasn’t a little scared, but I also knew in that moment that I wouldn’t deny him.

“Mick, it’s okay….. whatever you want to do….. it’s okay.”

I leaned down then, kissing him full on the mouth and running my tongue along his teeth. I heard him groan, the pace picking up between us as he moved his stare from my face to my neck, and then slowly, and very deliberately, he drew my head down, put his mouth against my skin and bit down.

The pain as his fangs pierced me was instant and fiercely intense, and my breath came out in a loud gasp. Almost simultaneously I felt my passion begin to crest as his mouth pulled on me, and the pain faded into the background as waves of pleasure rolled in to tip me over the edge. I cried out as my climax crashed over me, waves and waves coming fast and intense as my body convulsed around him.

I felt him go still then, his mouth dropping away from my neck as his face turned slack, eyes closed, his body shuddering as he emptied himself inside me. For long seconds we clutched at one another, the only sounds our jagged breathing and ecstatic sighs, until finally I collapsed on top of him, utterly spent, my body trembling from the last tingling after effects of the orgasm.

“Oh God…. Mick..” I whispered into his hair.

Arms coming around me to hug me close, he whispered back, “Thank you Beth.”

Wrapped in Mick’s arms, our bodies entwined, I closed my eyes, giving myself up to the drowsiness that suddenly seemed to overwhelm me, and slept.

 

______

To be continued…..


	6. Pretty good together.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: NC-17 
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story 
> 
> Chapter 6

I awoke the next morning to the sight of Mick, lying on his side next to me, head propped up on his hand, gazing at me with a look of love and wonderment on his face.

“Good morning.” he smiled.

“Good morning.” I grinned back, so glad he was still here with me, and not tucked away alone in his usual frozen resting place.

“So….” he asked, a mischievous grin playing about his lips, “..was it any good? Or should we be calling it a day do you think?”

“Not bad,” I told him, reaching out to place my hand on his side, caressing slow circles up and down his waist, “but maybe we should try it once again, you know......just to make sure?”

“Well I don’t know about that,” he teased, making a show of lifting his arm and looking at his wristwatch, “I was just about to get up and take a shower.”

“Oh… okay… I need to get going myself anyway. I have so much to do today.” I replied totally straight-faced, throwing back the covers and making a dash for the bathroom, glancing back over my shoulder as I went, and smiling at the look of open mouthed confusion on Mick’s face. Pausing at the door, and wondering at my audacity, I looked back, adding “Are you coming then?”

He didn’t need asking twice.

We stepped under the water together, Mick’s arms going around my waist, pulling me close to him, and I shivered at the feel of his body, firm and hard against me.

My hands resting on Mick’s forearms, I raised myself on tiptoe to give him a chaste kiss on the lips, drawing away even as I felt his mouth follow mine, hungry for more. Moving my mouth to the hollow of his neck, I gently placed a kiss against his skin there, opening my mouth and lapping the water from him, tasting him, and drawing long slow circles with my tongue. Moving back up along his throat, I placed soft kisses against his skin wherever I touched, and slowly kissed my way back up to his mouth, brushing my lips against the bottom of his, moving away when he tried to kiss me back, wanting just to touch and feel his lips under mine. He seemed to catch on, and closing his eyes, allowed me to take my time, moving my lips over his face, feeling the roughness of the bristles on his cheek, the softness of the skin around his eyes, kissing up and over his eyebrows, and back down to hover over his waiting mouth.

He opened his eyes, looking directly into mine, and the look of longing there took my breath away. I kissed him then, my tongue exploring his mouth as the water cascaded down around us, arching into him, my stomach contracting at the feel of him, long and hard, pressing into my belly. 

Breaking the kiss, Mick whispered “Turn around,” and still standing in the circle of his arms, I did just that, leaning my head back against his shoulder and closing my eyes as his hands came up to cup my breasts, slowly running his fingers over me and letting my nipples slide softly through his fingers over and over until I let out an involuntary gasp, then sending them downwards, trailing slow circles over my abdomen, before reaching down to stroke between my legs.

“God….. do you know what you do to me?” I gasped, having trouble standing upright as jolts of electricity began to travel through me, turning my legs to jelly and sending a delicious warmth through my belly, spreading and expanding within me, until I felt full and ready to explode.

“I think I have a pretty good idea,” he whispered, his mouth nibbling at the skin behind my ear. He slipped a finger inside me and I let out a deep sigh, moving my hips in time to the rhythm of his hand. An intense heat began to blossom under his fingertip and I felt myself begin to tip over the edge as waves of pleasure suddenly burst over me, scorching along my skin over and over, until I felt myself melting, my legs giving way beneath me as Mick caught me around the waist with one arm, and held me to him.

Breathless and panting, my body still shaking, I leaned my head against the shower stall, relishing the feeling of Mick’s arms around me as he hugged me to him and caressed every inch of my body. Finally catching my breath and lifting my head to lean back into the cascade of water, I turned in his arms and reached down to touch him, running my hand along his length and circling him in my fingers. He uttered a strangled groan and lifted my thigh, positioning himself against me but without entering. Breathless, I looked up at him, his face only inches from mine, the look on his face pure need and longing, as he little by little he eased himself inside me. 

Once he was sheathed inside me as far as he could go, he slowly began to move his hips, filling me so completely, and I had to close my eyes, totally lost in the sensations running through my mind and body. Slowly, so slowly, he moved in me, my muscles tightening around him, the feel of him sliding in and out of me striking my body alight with fire. Our rhythm shifted as the passion began to build between us, and I tightened my grip on Mick’s shoulders, burying my face in his neck as he plunged faster and faster inside me.

Reaching down between us, Mick put his fingers on me, and stroked over and over, bringing me again, until, completely lost in a sea of sensation, I cried out against him, feeling him shudder and still inside me as fulfilment crashed over us and he came, crying out my name as he pulsed hot and throbbing inside me.

Trembling, unable to move, we rested against each other, the water running rivulets over us as we regained our breath enough to speak.

“I think….,” I breathed, twining my arms about his neck and bringing his head down for a kiss, “we can safely say we’re pretty good together.”

As his lips found mine, he agreed, “Pretty good…. yes…”

 

______

To be continued…..


	7. P.S. I love you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> This chapter rating: PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 7

After we’d finally managed to get around to doing some actual cleaning up in the shower, Mick took the opportunity to retire to his freezer for a few hours. It seemed the hot water had taken it’s toll on him. Apparently he normally took cold showers; the cold water having a similar effect to the freezer, only just not quite as long lasting. However, on this occasion he’d forgone the cold water for my benefit, which I was grateful for, but I couldn’t help feeling bad that he hadn’t mentioned the effect it had on him, or that I hadn’t thought to ask. Somehow though, I couldn’t see myself enjoying great sex with chattering teeth and goosebumps, so maybe a little freezer time had been a small price to pay.

Mick told me to make myself at home and help myself to whatever leftovers from the night before that I could find in the refrigerator. However, after searching in vain through his cupboards for something that hadn’t gone out of date in the previous century, I resigned myself to staying hungry. It seemed he hadn’t made any assumptions about where things might lead the night before, and hadn’t stocked up on breakfast foods for me. Last night’s leftovers didn’t appeal, but on rummaging through the fridge, at least I managed to find some coffee, presumably bought during Mick’s brief time as a human, and resigned myself to a breakfast of caffeine.

Still clad only in a towel, I took my coffee back upstairs and wandered into the bathroom to examine the bite marks on my neck. The two neat puncture wounds were spaced about an inch apart along the vein which ran from just below my right ear to my collarbone. Pressing my fingers to the bite marks, I wondered at how quickly they seemed to have stopped bleeding. I hadn’t noticed any blood on the sheets, but then again, when Mick had fed from me in the desert that time, the wounds had healed very quickly then too. Explaining away the two tiny holes in my arm to Josh had been another matter, and although there was no one to whom I needed to explain this latest bite, I wasn’t exactly confident of walking into work on Monday with two, albeit tiny, holes in my neck.

Luckily, my hair, if I pulled it forward over my shoulders, was long enough to serve as a cover up, and if anyone did happen to notice, I could always tell them I’d been scratched by a cat. Unlikely as it might be for a cat to have scratched two perfectly round puncture marks, I doubted anyone would seriously suspect the real cause.

Just as I was wondering whether or not I could stand to put last night’s panties back on, or whether it was better to go without, I heard the distant ringing of my cell phone from downstairs, and made a dash to answer it before the caller rang off. Delving into my purse, I managed to catch the call before my voicemail cut in.

“Beth Turner,” I said, slightly breathless.

“Hey Beth, it’s Simone. I hope you don’t mind me calling….. Josef gave me your number.”

“Hey Simone, not at all. What can I do for you?”

“Well… it’s my birthday in a couple of weeks time. Josef's going to be throwing a party for me, and I'd love you and Mick to come along if you're free. It's Saturday the seventeenth. Do you think you can make it?”

“Hang on..” I said, scrambling though the junk in my purse, searching in vain for my diary, and finally tipping the entire contents onto Mick’s rug. Locating it at last, I flicked to the seventeenth. “No problem, I don’t have anything planned, and I’d love to come. Not sure about Mick, but if necessary, I’m sure I’ll be able to twist his arm.”

“Great! So the real reason for my call…. I was wondering, if you’re free this afternoon, if you might want to come clothes shopping with me? I need to find the perfect dress for the occasion, and it’d be so much more fun to go with you. Josef’s offered, but you know what men are like, they just want you to buy something quick so they can go home again.”

I thought of Mick, upstairs in the freezer, probably expecting me to be here when he woke up. But not having the faintest idea of how long he might sleep, and really wanting to take Simone up on her offer of an afternoon’s shopping, I decided I could leave him a note and call him later.

“I’d love to,” I said, “but I need to go home and change first…”

“Ahh…”

Damn… I hadn’t meant to tell Simone I’d stayed over at Mick’s, but the cat was out of the bag. “I’ll tell you all about it when I see you. Can you come by my apartment in about an hour?”

“An hour’s fine. I’ll see you then, and I want all the details!”, with that she rang off, and I gathered up the contents of my purse, throwing them randomly back inside, and dashed back upstairs to get dressed, towelling my hair dry as best I could.

Ripping a page out of the back of my diary, I wrote a quick note for Mick, sticking it to the front of his refrigerator, where I knew he would go soon after waking up.

“Mick, Gone shopping, back soon, Beth.” Pausing, my pen hovering over the paper hesitantly, I added “P.S. I Love You”, and hurried out the door before I could change my mind.

I took a taxi back to my apartment, changing into jeans and a red cashmere sweater, carefully choosing a pair of low heeled shoes that I knew wouldn’t leave me crippled by the end of the afternoon. Blow drying my hair straight, I took care to ensure that the marks on my neck were adequately covered, before adding a dash of mascara and some lip gloss, and standing back to look at myself in the mirror. Did I look different? Something had definitely changed. Maybe it was the smile that I couldn’t seem to wipe off my face. I don’t think that had been there when I got ready to go out last night. Just thinking about the reason for the change caused a huge grin to spread across my face, and I was still beaming like an idiot when I answered the door to Simon a few minutes later.

“Hey”, I said, feeling for all the world like the Cheshire Cat, as I pulled back the door and gestured for Simone to come inside.

“Well, I don’t think I need to ask how last night went,” Simone smirked as she followed me over to the couch. My only answer as we sat down, was to smile even wider, which caused her to laugh.

“I’m so glad. You two deserve some happiness.”

Pulling back my hair, I showed her my bite. “It was a-mazing. I never thought I could feel like that.”

Seeing Simone’s face drop, I was suddenly concerned. “What’s…… are you all right Simone?”

“Sorry…”, flustered, she fiddled with the bangle on her wrist, turning it over and over, “it’s just that Josef’s never bitten me there…. as far as I understand it, it’s a much more intimate bite than the usual wrist bite that vampires reserve for their freshies……..Sorry I didn’t mean to ….” her voice trailed off.

“Have you invited him to?” I asked.

“Not exactly… I’ve kind of hinted at it, but he always chooses to drink from my arm, even when we’re… you know..”

“Well maybe you should just ask him outright? At least you’d find out why if he tells you he doesn’t want to, and if he does, well… then problem solved. Mick didn’t exactly ask, and I didn’t exactly offer… it just seemed to happen.” I shrugged.

“Top of the ‘to do' list then”, Simone smiled, visibly gathering herself, “and to think I was offering to give you the advice.”

“It’s me that should be sorry Simone…. I didn’t realise… I didn’t mean to flaunt it like that.” I said, pulling my hair around to cover the marks.

“Beth”, Simone put her hand on mine, “don’t worry about it, you weren’t to know. Now let’s forget all about it, and get down to the important business….”

“Shopping!” we both said in unison, and laughing, we set off in search of the perfect dress.

 

______

To be continued…..  
_________________


	8. Twenty something dresses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 8

Simone drove us into town in her most recent acquisition, a stunning, red Mercedes convertible that she’d decided to treat herself to as an early birthday present to herself. 

“Wow, nice car,” I smiled appreciatively, running my hands over the soft leather seats and admiring the walnut trim interior, “working as a lawyer obviously pays a lot better than being a civilian investigator.”

“It’s hard work, but it definitely has it’s benefits,” she grinned back, flooring the accelerator as we turned onto a stretch of open road. “Now if only I could persuade Josef to let me drive the Ferrari occasionally…..”

I laughed, “Somehow, something tells me that Josef isn’t about to let you get your hands on his ‘baby’ anytime soon.”

“You’ve got that right, he certainly does love that car,” she sighed, “I just wish I could be so sure how he feels about me.”

I glanced over, immediately feeling a pang of sympathy at the wistful expression I saw on Simone’s face. “I think he really does care for you Simone. You should see the way he looks at you when you’re not aware of it.”

“I know he cares, but…..” she heaved another sigh, “it’s just that same old sticking point. He’s a vampire, and I’m a human, and basically to love us is to watch us die.” 

She glanced at me, and the hurt in her eyes made me forestall what I had been going to say. Instead, I just nodded my silent agreement, giving her a resigned smile, and turned back to look at the road, lost in my thoughts.

Mick and I had only briefly touched on the topic of his turning me, and although we both knew that I certainly wasn‘t ready for that step at the moment, and maybe never would be, we were both ignoring the fact that a long term relationship was not going to be realistic without it. It was all very well to be enjoying the here and now, but pushing aside the obvious wasn’t going to make it go away, and I resolved to speak to Mick about it sooner rather than later.

“Yes, I think that’s a subject I’m not going to be able to avoid for long, whether I like it or not,” I sighed. “What about you? Have you discussed it with Josef yet?”

“Not as such, I hinted at being interested in being turned, but that was after a few drinks, so I’m not sure how seriously he took the suggestion. He certainly didn’t give me any hint as to whether he would or not, just avoided the question and changed the subject,” she frowned. “I havn’t broached the matter with him since, but tipsy or not, I meant what I said. I want to be with him, and if that means joining the club, then that’s what I’m prepared to do.” 

She looked over at me, her face resolute, and seeing that look of determination on her face, I could only hope that Josef would eventually be able to put the past behind him, and overcome what had happened with Sarah Whitley. Not knowing if Josef had told Simone about Sarah, or what had happened, I kept quiet, knowing that this was something Josef had to tell her about himself. For both his and Simone’s sakes, I hoped it wouldn’t be too long. 

I thought about telling Simone about my embarrassing episode with the Black Crystal, but decided that maybe we didn’t know each other quite that well yet. Perhaps in time I’d share, but for now I was keeping that little piece of information to myself. I was just grateful that at least Mick had some sense and hadn’t acted on my drug induced pleas for him to turn me. I had to wonder what made me keep a small vial of the drug hidden away in my dresser drawer. Or maybe it was best not to.

Lost in contemplation, we drove in silence the rest of the way, but it wasn’t long before we were swinging into the parking lot, and we stepped out into the hot sunshine. Simone handed over the car keys to the waiting valet and we headed in the direction of a nearby restaurant to catch a bite to eat before embarking on our mission.

Once we’d eaten, Simone led the way to a very expensive looking boutique that I noticed with trepidation had no price tags on anything. Seeing my look of apprehension, Simone leaned in and whispered “I have Josef’s credit card, and I’m under instruction not to worry about how much it costs.” She grinned evilly, “I can’t believe he trusts me that much!”

“Ah well, in that case, we’re definitely in the right place!” I grinned back, stopping to admire a beautiful black satin Valentino dress, secure in the knowledge that I’d certainly never own one, but happy to watch as Simone got to pick out her party dress.

The sales assistant approached, a middle aged woman tastefully dressed in a black and white suit, with dark hair pulled back in a rather severe looking bun. She smiled a somewhat aloof looking smile, and asked how she could help us, the smile soon turning more friendly once Simone had explained what she was looking for. We were led to a seating area in the back of the boutique, where another assistant offered us refreshments, indicating that we should sit down to await the personal shopper, who would assist us in finding exactly what we were looking for. Relaxing back into the cream leather armchair, I accepted a glass of chilled fruit juice, and sat back to enjoy the show.

Approximately twenty dresses later, having admired and criticised Simone in everything from Chanel to Gucci, I finally saw the dress that suited Simone perfectly. A gorgeous Donna Karan silk wrap dress in emerald and acid green. The material was ruched at the front, draping softly to the floor in a downward V shape, and gathering in soft asymmetric folds. It set off Simone’s brunette hair and brown eyes to a tee, and vigorously nodding my approval, I gave her the thumbs up.

“You have to buy that dress Simone, it’s absolutely stunning!” 

Twirling around with a huge smile on her face, there was no doubt that she was most definitely in agreement, and the sales assistant dashed off to find matching purse and shoes, arriving back seconds later with a gorgeous green mock croc leather clutch bag, and a delicate pair of gold strappy sandals. 

“Perfect!” grinned Simone, never even asking the price, “I’ll take the lot.” 

Within no time the dress, sandals and purse were carefully packed away , Josef’s bank account was relieved of a considerable sum of money, and we headed off in the direction of somewhere a little more suited to my price range. After a little time spent window shopping, I spotted a divine pink dress in the window of a small boutique, and we went in to take a look.

“Now that’s more like it,” I said, taking a look at the price tag, “at least the clothes in this store have prices on them!”

“Trust me, I don’t normally shop in places like that,” laughed Simone, “but what’s a girl to do when she’s been told to spare no expense? I wouldn’t want to disappoint him.” 

“You certainly won’t be doing that,” I grinned, “and I’m not just talking about the money.”

We made our way towards the dressing rooms, and Simone took a seat outside, while I went into one of the cubicles to change. The dress was a gorgeous crinkle voile, tie dyed in shades of pink, clinched at the waist with a wide black satin belt and flaring out to just below the knee.

“Beautiful.” declared Simone, as I emerged from the changing room and took a spin in front of the mirror.

The dress did indeed look lovely , the light silk material floating around me, and the small bias sleeves giving it a very feminine and fashionable look. “I think that must be a first,” I said, going up on tiptoe and turning around to see the view from the back, “I’ve never managed to find a dress that quickly before. Must be an omen!”

“An omen for a great party to come I hope!” said Simone.

After a couple more stops to buy some accessories to match we were all done, a successful afternoon’s shopping under our belt, and looking forward to the party, when we could show off our new purchases. Returning to the car, we carefully loaded our bags in the trunk, and set off back home. 

Not wanting to presume too much, I decided to call Mick before just turning up on his doorstep. For some strange reason, despite the events of the past evening and earlier this morning, I was beginning to feel nervous about seeing him again. Things were suddenly going so well after so many ups and downs, that I was finding it hard believe that the other shoe wasn’t about to drop. Telling myself not to be stupid, I dialled the number and waited as it rang.

He picked up on the third ring, obviously knowing it was me from the caller display. “Hey, shopping all finished?” came the gorgeous deep voice that always made my stomach flip.

“All done.” I replied. “Is it convenient if I come by in about an hour? I didn’t know if you had plans….” my voice trailed off.

“Only ones that involve you…….. and a bed….” came the reply, and Simone glanced over at me and smiled as I proceeded to turn an attractive shade of beetroot. 

“Okay, see you in an hour then,” I said, quickly cutting the call off before things could get any worse.

I asked Simone if she would drop me off at home so I could grab a change of clothing and a toothbrush, then set out in my own car for Mick’s, stopping at the grocery store en route, to buy a few bits and pieces to fill up his kitchen cupboards.

After mulling over the conversation Simone and I had in the car, I’d made up my mind to have a talk with Mick about the whole future of our relationship thing. Maybe it wasn’t what he would want to discuss right now, but I needed to let him know how I felt, and vice versa, to know how he felt about it too. 

Finally stepping out of the elevator and walking up to Mick’s door, I took a deep breath and knocked.

______

To be continued…..


	9. One step at a time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 9

Mick answered the door almost immediately, causing me to raise my eyebrows somewhat.

“Hey, were you keeping a lookout?” I asked, meaning it as a joke.

“No...” he answered, looking slightly embarrassed, like he’d been caught out, “but I can feel when you’re near….” He took a step back, gesturing for me to come inside.

Well that certainly explained a lot. “Wow.. have you always been able to do that? Or is this something new?“ I asked, walking over to the kitchen with the bag of groceries.

“I think it’s the blood. Maybe….. I’m not sure exactly. The first time it happened was after that time in the desert….” his voice trailed off, and I could see he was still uncomfortable talking about it.

“When you fed on me.” I said, deliberately. “Mick, it‘s nothing to be embarrassed about. You were dying. I had the means to save you. End of story. You drank my blood last night without a problem, and it was wonderful. In fact it was more than wonderful, it was………” I gestured with my hands, at a loss for words to describe how it had made me feel.

“That was different. I wasn’t feeding. It was a part of..” he paused, looking for the right word, “….making love. One we both enjoyed. I doubt you felt anything like that the first time.” He started emptying out the contents of the grocery bag and looked aghast as he took out a jar of Marmite

“Ugh! You eat this stuff?“ he grimaced. “I remember an old army buddy of mine trying to get me to eat Marmite sandwiches when we were stationed in Great Britain during the war. Revolting! Where did you even get it?“

Snatching it out of his hand, I briskly put it away in the cupboard. “Well, it’s just as well you don’t have to eat it then! Maybe I‘ll smear it over my neck when I’m not in the mood to be bitten!”

He raised his eyebrows, laughing. “That would work.” 

“Anyway, to answer your question…. no, I didn’t feel anything like that the first time. In fact it wasn’t very pleasant at all.” I frowned, remembering the intense pain, and the strange feeling of hating what was happening, whilst at the same time relishing every moment of it

“That was probably because you were feeling what I was feeling..” Mick looked down, his brows knitted together in a frown. “That’s generally what makes a bite good. Drinking fresh blood is like a rush, it gives you a high, makes you feel on top of the world, and that’s what communicates itself to whoever you’re drinking from.”

“You hated having to feed from me didn’t you?”

He didn’t answer me, but the look on his face told me all I needed to know, and instinctively I went over and put my arms around him, hugging him tight.

He hugged me back, burying his face in my hair and breathing in deep. For a long while we stood like that, just holding each other, until finally I pulled back and reached up to place a soft kiss against the corner of his mouth. 

“Okay…..” I said, determined to lighten the mood, “anyone for Marmite sandwiches?”

He laughed then, his whole face creasing up, as he grabbed me around the waist and pulled me in for a long lingering kiss.

I was just starting to want a whole lot more than kissing when he released me and turned back to the grocery unpacking. Sneaking me a sideways glance, an evil grin on his face, he asked “What?”

“You are a terrible tease Mick St. John,” I grumped, picking up a carton of orange juice and putting it in the refrigerator, as far away as possible from the pile of blood bags stacked haphazardly on the top shelf. 

The shopping all put away, Mick made me some tea and poured himself a glass of A-positive, and we settled down on the couch, Mick at one end, and me at the other, facing each other. I kicked off my shoes and, leaning back, put my feet up in Mick’s lap. I got the raised eyebrow look as he looked down at my feet and back up again. “You do know that vampires have very sensitive noses, don’t you?” he teased. “Hard afternoon’s shopping?”

Scowling at him, I went to remove them, but he caught me before I could pull away, smirking slightly, and settled them back on his lap, massaging in small circles on the soles, which felt absolutely heavenly on my tired feet.

Settling back to enjoy the foot massage, I explained where I’d been all afternoon. “Simone wanted to go dress shopping for her birthday party, which incidentally we’re both invited to, and she asked me if I’d go with her. Josef let her loose with his credit card, so we had a great time deciding how best to spend his money.”

“Ah…clothes shopping. That explains why you were so long.” he smiled.

“Yeah..” I took a deep breath, thinking that now was as good a time as any to bring the subject up, “Simone and I did some talking too…… did you know she asked Josef if he’d turn her?”

Mick’s hands paused in their activities on my feet. “Er… yeah, he did mention something about it.”

I looked Mick straight in the eye. “She said he avoided the answer.”

Mick just nodded slowly, not saying anything.

“It got me to thinking about us,” I continued, watching Mick’s reaction. He was starting to look uncomfortable with the direction the conversation was heading, but I was determined to have this out with him. “You told me once that you wouldn’t turn me, even if it meant letting me die. Did you mean that?”

“Beth….” he put my feet back on the couch and turned to face me fully, “where is this coming from? I thought we’d been through this? You told me you didn’t ever want to have to make the decision, and you know I don’t want to turn you.”

“I don’t want you to.” I said, unsure even as I said it. “Not now anyway. But not even to save me? Not even if I wanted it?” Suddenly I felt close to tears.

“Beth…” he spread his arms, at a loss for words.

“I need to know Mick.” I could feel the tears threatening to fall now. “If I asked you to turn me, if I really wanted it… I mean… not like before when I was high on the Black Crystal, but if it was something I really felt ready to do. Would you do it?” I choked out the last part, holding my breath as I waited for his reply.

For long moments he didn’t answer, just looking at me, as though unsure what his answer was going to be. At last he replied, “Beth, I honestly don’t know..”

“Is it because you wouldn’t want me as a vampire? Do you only love me because I’m human?” The tears were falling in earnest now. “Because I want you either way. Vampire or human, it’s you I love, not what you are.” 

He closed his eyes, putting his hand to his forehead as if in pain. “Beth, being a vampire has a lot of downsides. I’ve learned to live with it, but it’s not something I’d want to inflict on someone and have them suffer the way I did. There’s just no way you could have any idea unless you experience it.”

This was not the answer I‘d been hoping for, although I‘d half expected it, and I felt my heart sink. “Is that a no then?” 

He looked at me then, an unhappy look on his face. “No, it’s not a no. It’s a maybe, and that’s all I can give you for now. But if there’s a way I could ever become human again, I’d do it. I’d do it in an instant, and I wouldn’t go back, not for anything. You were right about being human meaning that sometimes you lose people you love, but you have to realise that the same can be true of being a vampire.”

I nodded, unable to speak past the lump in my throat. I did understand, but it didn’t hurt any less because of it. Leaning over, I took Mick’s hand in mine and squeezed it, feeling his fingers wrap themselves around mine and squeeze me back. I wished for all the world that I’d never begun this conversation. Sometimes it was better not to ask. Not to know. Wasn’t it?

"Maybe I should go," I said, leaving being the last thing in the world that I wanted to do, "I should never have put you on the spot like that." I started to stand up, finding my hand still caught tightly in Mick's, and relief washed over me as I felt him pull me towards him until I fell into his lap.

"You are not getting away that easily," he said, cradling me in his arms, "I nearly lost you once already, and it's not happening again. I love you Beth. I don't know how exactly, but we'll work something out. Let's just take it one step at a time. We'll get there." He raised his hand up, stroking my hair, and leaned down to place the softest of kisses against my lips.

Returning his kiss, I reached up and pulled his head down to mine, opening my mouth under his and feeling my stomach turn to liquid at the touch of his tongue against mine.

"Make love to me Mick," I said, needing more than ever to feel him inside me.

He smiled, his slate blue eyes crinkling at the corners as he gazed into my eyes. "Okay." he replied.

______

To be continued…..  
_________________


	10. A visit from a friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 10

A sharp knock on the door brings me back to the present with a jolt, and my senses are suddenly on full alert. Very slowly placing the photo of Mick back down on the desk, I quietly slide my chair away from the desk, and get to my feet, ears straining for any sound that might give a clue as to who is on the other side of the door.

Reminding myself that would be attackers don’t usually knock first, I try to remain calm, and make my way over to the door, pressing the button to activate the video screen. As soon as I see the figure impatiently pacing outside, I let out a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding. Tossing her long, dark, curly hair over her shoulders, and glaring up at the security camera, is my long time friend, and freshie, Rachael.

Josef had introduced us just after I’d first been turned, and although, initially, it hadn’t been a particularly pleasant experience for either of us, over time we had forged a bond that had transcended mere friendship, and grown into a relationship that was almost symbiotic in nature; each of us, in a way, dependent on one another, in a similar way that an addict is dependent on their fix. Rachael offered me what I needed to survive, and, in return, I was somehow able to satisfy whatever need drove her to become a willing blood donor. Only it was so much more than that; somewhere along the way we’d become firm friends, and, when the time came, which at some point it inevitably would, that she was no longer my freshie, I sincerely hoped we’d remain close.

I knew the reason for the angry look in Rachael’s eyes. I’d been avoiding her for the last week. I had shut myself away from everyone, preferring to grieve alone, and denying myself the pleasure I knew feeding fresh would bring, choosing instead to get by on bagged blood alone. It just didn’t seem right to be enjoying anything at the moment, but in denying myself, I’d forgotten about Rachael and how this might be affecting her.

Pressing my finger on the entry button I take a deep breath as I pull the door back and attempt a welcoming smile.

“Hey.”

“Hey yourself.” She manages to make it sound accusing as she darts me a reproving look, before stepping inside and making her way over to the couch in front of the window. Throwing her purse amongst the cushions, she shrugs out of her coat and lays it over the arm, turning around to look me square in the face with her arms crossed over her chest

“I’ve been so worried about you Jacqui. You havn’t been at home. You didn’t return any of my calls. I had to find out what had happened from Helena. You could have at least called me.” Her voice is shaky with emotion despite the admonishing look she’s giving me, and I can see the shine of unshed tears threatening behind her eyes.

Pushing the door closed behind me, I attempt to defend myself. “Rache…… I’m so sorry… I never thought… I’ve just been so….” my voice falters as I feel a lump rising in my throat, and the tears I’ve been unable to shed suddenly well up to cloud my vision. I look at Rachael through a blurry haze, unable to continue.

Before I know what’s hit me, Rachael’s arms are around me, hugging me fiercely, and I’m clinging on to her, the pent up emotions of the past few days bursting out of me and flowing down my cheeks unchecked. “I’m so sorry……” I choke.

“It’s okay Jacqui,” she tightens her hold on me and stokes my hair over and over, “I didn’t mean to have a go at you, I’ve just been so worried about you.”

All I can seem to manage in reply is a loud sob, and I bury my head on her shoulder, grateful to be able to cry at last as she rocks me gently, patting my hair and making soothing noises as I let go of all the anguish and torment of the last few days. 

At last I pull back and disentangle myself , holding her at arms length as I brush haphazardly at the tears on my cheeks, no doubt smearing mascara all over my face in the process. “Thanks Rachael,” I tell her, “you have no idea how much I needed that.”

“Anytime,” she replies with a small smile, “that’s what friends are for.”

“I just can’t believe he’s gone….. I keep expecting him to turn up, or to find him sitting behind his desk like nothing happened. But..… he’s just gone. It seems so unreal. Only this time it is for real. He’s really not coming back.” The appalling loneliness of it hits me like a slap, and I gaze at her, unseeing, and utterly desolate. 

Aware of her warm hand holding mine, I let her draw me towards the couch and pull me down to sit beside her. “I’ll miss him too,” she says, “very much so.” Turning to look at her, I see fresh tears rolling down her face, even as she tries to blink them away. 

All I can do is nod in silent agreement as I reach out to comfort her in return. As I hold her tight I can feel her pulse beating steadily, hear the rush of blood in her veins, and smell the sweet coppery scent just beneath the surface of her skin. Burying my face against her neck I breathe in deep, feeling the first stirrings of hunger begin to elongate my fangs as I let myself think about how good it would feel to savour her blood in my mouth, to feel it flowing warm and sweet down my throat like melted chocolate. Catching myself, I try to quell the hunger burgeoning inside me, but it’s a poor attempt. It’s been over a week since I’ve fed fresh, and my body’s crying out for blood. Even as I offer Rachael my consolation, I can feel myself fully vamp out, and I have to grit my teeth to stop from sinking my fangs into her right here on the spot.

She notices straight away of course. She hasn’t been my freshie for over five years without learning to recognize the signs. Drawing back slightly, she deftly unbuttons the cuff of her shirt, and with the tears still wet on her face, she offers me her arm. I glance at her just once, to make sure it’s okay, then I seize her arm in a vice-like grip and sink my teeth gratefully into her flesh. As my fangs pierce the skin, the first warm trickle of blood hits my tongue like melted butter, and I swallow it down, savouring the sweet, delicious flavour as it trickles down my throat like liquid ambrosia. I can feel myself starting to tremble as the rush kicks in, a chemical reaction that floods like lightning throughout my body, setting every nerve ending tingling with a high that is almost orgasmic in nature, although it has nothing to do with sex. Greedily I draw at her arm, gulping down her lifeblood as it begins to flow more freely, relishing every mouthful, but careful not to overdo it, lest I take too much in my eagerness. It still scares me how easily I could lose control, get lost in the exhilaration and the thrill, and simply drink her lifeblood down until I drain her dry. Glancing sideways to check she’s okay, I see her, her head thrown back against the cushions, eyes closed in ecstasy, a blissful expression smoothing out her face, as a gentle sigh escapes her lips.

Gulping down a few more precious mouthfuls, I draw back with some difficulty, deftly cleaning the puncture marks with my tongue, and holding her arm aloft to help stem the bleeding. Reaching out and grabbing a tissue, I gently place it against the wound, and fold her arm upwards across her chest. She’s still leaning back against the couch with her eyes closed, her breathing fast and shallow, but she’s smiling, her whole face aglow with the lingering impression of our recently shared bliss, and I know from experience that she’ll be fine. 

My own first experience at donating blood to a vampire had been a whole different experience altogether, but I knew now why that was. If the vampire didn’t enjoy it, then neither did the donor, and although Mick had needed my blood, he certainly hadn’t taken any pleasure in being forced into drinking it for his survival. Any satisfaction he had gained from it had been far outweighed by the sense of humiliation and loathing he had felt. Now, looking back, I totally understand what he must have experienced. The degradation of a situation like that is terrible, and one of the major downsides to being a vampire. Now that it’s too late, unfortunately, I really understand Mick a whole lot better.

The second time, however, had been a completely different affair. A well timed bite during lovemaking could be a totally mind-blowing experience, and Mick had timed it to perfection our first time together. It was probably the most intense orgasm I’d ever felt up to that point, and I honestly never expected it could get any better. That was, of course, before the next time.

Which is where I get back to my story……….

______

To be continued…..


	11. Too much of a good thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To set the scene (after all the jumping backwards and forwards in time), this takes place just after Beth and Mick have the conversation about whether he would ever turn her, or not. Beth was getting up to leave after feeling bad about putting Mick on the spot, but Mick caught her hand and pulled her back onto the couch. Somewhere along the way Beth asked Mick to make love to her, and he agreed.
> 
> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: NC-17 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 11

I’d had my fantasies about Mick; there was no denying it. I’d imagined our first proper kiss, what it would be like to have sex with him. I’d even thought about how it would feel to be bitten during lovemaking. So far, I’d experienced everything I could possibly have conceived of, and more, and the reality was immeasurably superior to anything my imagination could possibly have dreamt up. 

Still, there were some things that I had never envisaged, and I was about to get my first taste of all that sex with a vampire had to offer.

Brazen woman that I was, I’d just asked Mick to make love to me. Luckily, as it turned out, he’d said yes, or it could so easily have turned into one of those dreadful ‘awkward’ moments….

“I hope you’re not always going to be this demanding,” he smiled, brushing a soft kiss against my lips, “an old guy like me has to be careful not to overdo it you know. Besides….. you know what they say about too much of a good thing?”

I raised innocent eyebrows at him. “No. What do they say?”

“No idea,” he laughed, starting to kiss his way down the side of my neck. “Take it and be grateful I should think.”

“Sounds like good advice.” I grinned, luxuriating in the feel of his lips, soft against the sensitive skin of my throat. “Hey, you know what they say about old men don’t you?”

He looked up, cocking an eyebrow, “No? What do they say?”

“I’ll let you know when I find out,” I laughed, “I’ve never had an eighty-five year old boyfriend before!”

“Really? I’m your first?” he teased, a smile playing at the corner of his mouth. “Funnily enough I’ve never dated a woman nearly sixty years younger than me either.”

I stared at him with a mock serious look on my face. “Do you think we should be worried about the age gap? It is rather a large one, even by Hollywood standards.”

He made the pretence of thinking about it for a moment or two. “Well…… if you’re worried, maybe we should call a halt now, before things go too far. I think I have a Scrabble board somewhere around if you’d prefer that?“ His face broke into a wide grin, his eyes sparkling with humour.

“Sex first, Scrabble later,” I said, laughing as I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him down until his mouth met mine.

His lips were as soft as velvet as they hovered over mine, brushing light as a feather against my mouth, teasing me with the promise of more, only to draw away each time I tried to deepen the kiss. It was torture, but torture of the exquisite kind, and I could feel his lips smiling against mine every time I tried to claim his mouth with my own. 

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” I said, giving up my struggle, and laying back in Mick’s arms, surrendering myself to the delicious torment he seemed determined to inflict upon me.

His viridian eyes regarded mine from just inches away. “You asked me to make love to you,” he answered, “and that’s exactly what I intend to do. Whether you like it or not…” he added, a wicked grin crinkling the skin at the corners of those remarkable eyes.

Smiling, and turning my head into the hollow of Mick’s shoulder I breathed in the smell of his skin. He smelled of the shower, clean and fresh, and faintly of soap, the hair curling over the base of his neck still damp.

“Not fair… you’re all clean,” I murmured, “I didn’t get a chance to shower before I came over.” 

“You smell wonderful,” he breathed, burying his face in my shoulder, inhaling deeply, as his hands fumbled with the small buttons at the front of my sweater and he began to kiss his way down my throat. The gossamer touch of his lips against my skin felt incredible, and I closed my eyes, my head thrown back, taking in a sharp breath as his hand slipped inside my bra and over my breast, his thumb stroking the nipple and causing a shudder of excitement that literally took my breath away. Proceeding to undo the buttons one by one, he pushed the sweater aside and dropped a kiss in the hollow of my chest, gently lifting my breasts out of my bra and flicking his tongue over the nipples, slowly licking in circles around each one in turn, until they hardened in response. 

Just when I thought I couldn’t stand any more, he moved lower and began to kiss his way down across my stomach, running his tongue around my navel, and licking a cool, wet line down to the waistband of my jeans. I felt his fingers undo the button and slide down the zip, and I couldn’t help but jerk in reaction as he lowered his mouth to me again and pressed a kiss into my stomach, just above the line of my panties. His hands eased my jeans down over my hips, and slid them smoothly down my thighs and over my feet, finally pulling them free and dropping them onto the floor at our side.

Remembering a little too late that I hadn’t dressed with this in mind, and was wearing my ‘comfortable’ panties rather than the sexy lingerie that would have been better suited to the occasion, I started to sit up, somewhat embarrassed that I was practically naked, save for the ‘old faithful’ underwear, whilst Mick was still fully dressed. Mick, however, had other ideas, and gently but firmly pushed me back down against the cushions, lowering his face to my stomach and licking along my skin just above where my panties covered me. When I felt his mouth move down between my legs and his tongue lick me through the thin material, it was like an electric shock, and I couldn’t help myself from gasping out loud. Just thinking of where this was going was turning me on like nothing I’d ever experienced before, and even as I felt the dampness soaking through the thin cotton of my panties in anticipation, at the same time I was beginning to feel all kinds of nervous about what was about to happen .

Struggling to sit up, I tried again, “But Mick…… you’re still dressed…..”

“Easily remedied.” he grinned, and standing up, he made quick work of the grey Henley, pulling it over his head and dropping it on the floor at his side. The boots were next, and as he sat down to pull them off, I admired his well toned upper body and they way the muscles in his arms rippled as he heaved off, first one, and then the other boot, throwing them across the floor before standing up to divest himself of his jeans.

Drinking in the sight of him, I watched as at last he slipped out of his boxers, my gaze transfixed on the beauty of him, standing naked before me.

“Better?”

“Better.” I squeaked, laying back down against the cushions, my heart thundering as Mick knelt before me and slipped my panties down over my hips, planting a kiss on me as he did do.

“I don’t usually wear those panties,” I stammered, adding, somewhat unnecessarily, “they were just comfortable for shopping in.” I mentally slapped my forehead as soon as I’d said it. What a stupid thing to come out with! I was starting to babble with nerves.

“Right. Comfortable…” smirked Mick, trying to hide a smile. He moved up to kiss me, stroking a stray strand of my hair away from my face as he did so. “Are you okay Beth? This isn’t…..um… I mean, if you’d prefer not to……” He broke off, not quite finding the right words to ask me. “You have done this before havn’t you?” he asked gently.

“Oh God yes……” I felt like an idiot, “it’s not that…..I just….” my voice trailed off. How was I supposed to tell him that all I could seem to think about was the possibility that he might vamp out at some point, and whether he might bite me or not? The thought of it scared me half to death, and at the same time excited the hell out of me.

“Oh.. this is hard...” I looked him in the eye with some difficulty, “it’s just that I can’t help wondering if you’ll vamp out… you know….“ I paused, trying to find the right words, “not that it would be a problem if you did……,” I added hastily, “but I was just, well, wondering……..”

Stroking my face tenderly, he placed another kiss on my lips, “Are you worried I’m going to bite you?” he asked. Then, perhaps seeing the look of longing in my eyes, he added, “Or do you want me to?”

I looked down, knowing exactly what my answer was going to be, but reluctant to voice it out loud. Finally, raising my eyes to his, I looked him straight in the eye, and gave him the only answer I could. 

“Yes. And yes.”

He kissed me then. Soft kisses that soon became more insistent, and had my mouth opening under his, welcoming the touch of his tongue as it entwined with mine. With a groan, he crushed my lips to his, bringing his hand around to cup the back of my head, holding me against him, and kissing me very, very thoroughly. I lost myself in that kiss, my body pressing itself into his, my arms wound tight around his shoulders and neck, pulling him ever closer, as though our bodies could melt into one.

As his mouth began to move over my throat and down my chest, I threw my head back and shut my eyes tight, feeling goosebumps rise up on the surface of my skin where his lips passed. His hands played over my stomach and up over my breasts, reaching around to unhook my bra and toss it to the floor along with our other discarded clothes. Kissing me all the while, he slowly worked his way down my waist, over my hips, and along my legs, tracing his tongue back upwards along my inner thigh, almost reaching that part of me I most wanted him to touch, so that I jolted sharply in reaction, and then moving away to similarly tease me on the other side. He kept up the sweet torment for what felt like forever, and I realised I was holding my breath in anticipation.

Just as I let out a breath and started to take in a gulp of much needed air, at last his tongue flicked over me, and I let out an involuntary sigh of pure, unadulterated, bliss. Again and again I felt his tongue stroke over that part of me, and, as the pleasure began to build, I gradually began to move my hips in rhythm. I gasped out loud as his fingers entered me, sliding inside with ease, then pressing upwards against my g-spot, and nearly sending me through the ceiling with the intense surge of arousal it produced.

Digging my nails into the couch cushions, I arched upwards, panting hard, and biting down on my lip as I felt the beginnings of something large starting to expand inside of me, desperately pressing outward for release. I began to grow hot under Mick’s tongue, and all of a sudden I found myself tipping over the edge, as the bubble within me burst out, sending wave after wave of electrifying pulses racing like lightning along my skin, flooding my entire body with a tingling, permeating warmth that totally stole my breath away. 

Long seconds ticked by as my whole body was held rigid by the sensations pouring through it. I could hear myself taking little gasping breaths as each new wave rolled over me. Gradually the waves began to slow, and I felt myself start to relax, only to be rocked rigid once more as I felt an intense, sharp pain at my center, and screamed out in shock, struggling to sit up in my confusion. No sooner had I felt the pain though, than the second orgasm crashed over me with an overwhelming sense of ecstasy, slamming into me like wall, and throwing me back against the cushions, able only to claw helplessly at the air.

Distantly, I could sense Mick drawing on me, and with each pull a new orgasm seemed to balloon and rupture inside me, over and over, a never-ending tide of bliss, so huge that it threatened to crush me under the weight of it. Someone was screaming, and I realised it was me. The pleasure was so intense it was almost unbearable, and I found myself reaching down to thread my fingers through Mick’s hair. “Enough!” I managed to gasp out.

Immediately I felt a lessening of the intensity, as Mick withdrew from me, giving one last lick to clean the wound before moving up to place a gentle kiss against my mouth. I could taste myself on his lips, and the metallic tang of blood, but I found I didn’t mind it at all. Opening my eyes, I looked into Mick’s pale silver ones, and it seemed so right, and so wonderful, and I thanked my lucky stars that somehow this amazing man and I had made it this far. As I smiled into his eyes I saw the gradual change as they darkened and solidified back into the usual hazel blue.

“That was A-mazing,” I smiled, feeling like the cat that got a whole store’s worth of cream, and maybe a tasty mouse or two as well. I felt more relaxed than I’d felt in months, my entire body completely and utterly satisfied beyond any limit I had previously thought possible. Strangely though, Mick’s face was starting to dissolve around the edges, and I squinted at him to try and bring it back into focus. “Why do you look all hazy?” I mumbled.

I reached my hand up to caress the side of Mick’s face. I remember that he caught it and placed a soft kiss at the center of my palm, before holding it to his cheek. Then, like a light being switched off, a black curtain closed over my eyes and I knew nothing more.

__________________________

To be continued/....


	12. Human or vampire?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: This chapter PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 12

I awoke to the sound of voices drifting up from the room below. Disorientated, I struggled to sit up, realising I was in Mick’s bed, but somewhat confused as to how I’d arrived there. Someone downstairs was having a heated discussion judging by the tone of the conversation, and, my curiosity roused at recognizing Josef’s voice, I threw back the covers, and hastened to find out what was going on. Slightly startled at discovering I was completely naked beneath the covers, I quickly grabbed the comforter off the bed, wrapping it securely around myself as I headed for the door.

Just as I was reaching for the door handle, I heard running footsteps outside, and stepped back just in time as the door flew open and Mick appeared in the doorway, a look of relief, mixed with panic, showing starkly on his face as he caught sight of me.

“Thank God…Beth!” he uttered, in a strangled voice, letting go the door jamb and taking a couple of steps toward me. He shook his head, as if to clear it, before gently taking hold of me by the shoulders and looking searchingly into my eyes.

“Mick… what’s going on?” I was confused, and he was starting to frighten me with the strange way he was behaving.

“Beth….” he began, his gaze fixed on me, his fingers starting to hurt my skin, the way they were digging into my arms, “.. Beth… I need to know if you’re… okay.” He swallowed nervously. “It’s important Beth….” his eyes searched mine, “are you feeling all right?”

“Mick,” I said, frowning at his concern, “I feel fine. What’s all this about?” Really confused now, I moved to hug Mick, to reassure him I was okay, but, his body stiffening slightly, he continued to hold me at arms length.

Catching sight of Josef hanging back in the hallway, I directed my question to him, hoping to find out what on earth was going on. “Josef,” I implored, “what’s this all about?”

Josef looked slightly embarrassed, as if he wanted to be anywhere but where he was right now. Glancing up at me, he raised an eyebrow in my direction. “Er… hi Beth. You’ll… er…. have to excuse Mick here…. he seems to have his panties in a wad over something he thinks he’s done.” Then, exchanging a meaningful glance with Mick as he passed by, “But I really don’t think he has anything to worry about.”

“What are you talking about?” I was starting to get annoyed now. “Will someone please tell me what’s going on here?”

Josef turned to Mick. “I think you owe Beth an explanation.”

I looked at Mick expectantly. He had an uncomfortable look on his face, his whole demeanour telling me that he really didn’t want to tell me, but felt obliged to do so. His hands went to his hips and he glanced nervously off to the side, before finally bringing his eyes back to meet mine. He let out a deep sigh, and looking rather embarrassed, mumbled “I thought I may have accidentally……” he paused, gazing at me intently as he did so, “…..turned you….” he finished.

Stunned, I wasn’t quite sure I’d heard right. “You thought WHAT?” I was finding this all very hard to believe.

Looking highly uncomfortable, he repeated what he’d said. “I thought I’d accidentally turned you….. and that…. something had gone wrong.” He raised his eyes to the ceiling, letting out a trembling breath, “I’m such an idiot!”

“Well that’s something we can all agree on,” quipped Josef, taking a step closer and shaking his head at Mick, “but I’m sure we can have this all sorted out momentarily.”

“May I?” Josef asked, his warm brown eyes smiling into mine, as he raised his hand and gestured toward my neck.

“Oh.. I’m not planning on drinking your blood,” he laughed, seeing the look of shock horror that came over my face, “I just want to…” he paused, as if searching for the right word, “.. test you.”

I shot a questioning look at Mick, now completely bewildered by the turn of events. “What the heck?…”

“Please Beth, I just need to check you’re……” Mick hesitated a second, “…. okay. Josef won’t hurt you, I promise.”

“You are kidding me! Is this some sort of joke? I’m FINE!” I could not believe he was serious about this! “Mick, are you expecting me to believe you can ACCIDENTALLY turn someone into a vampire?” I was shaking my head in disbelief.

“Beth, I completely agree with you, but there’s one very easy way to settle this.” Josef stepped close to me and leaned in to whisper “just indulge my buddy here, I’m sure you’re fine.”

Not at all sure I was fine, at least not in the general sense of the word, I hesitated, glancing from Josef to Mick, and back again. “Okay….do what you have to.” I told Josef at last, still more than a little wary.

Josef gave me a reassuring smile, but his choice of words didn’t exactly do much to comfort me. “Don’t worry Beth,” he said, grinning, “I already ate before I came over.” And with that, he leaned into me, his hand going to the back of my neck to rest lightly against my skin, as he put his face to my throat, and, closing his eyes, inhaled deeply.

The change was swift and utterly terrifying. One minute he was just Josef, roguish businessman and loyal friend of Mick’s, the next, he was someone, something, else entirely. Something that wanted me in the worst possible way. His low growl reverberated against my skin, sending chills up and down my spine, as my heart began to hammer wildly in my chest. I could feel his breath, cold against my skin, as he slowly began to inch closer to my neck. Adrenalin was coursing through me at a rate of knots, willing me to run, but my legs seemed made of lead, and I stood rooted to the spot, completely unable to move. On a conscious level I knew this was just Josef, and that he would never deliberately do anything to hurt me, but my instincts were telling me something completely different. My breath was coming in short gasps, and it was all I could do to raise my eyes to Mick’s, silently begging for him to help me.

As I felt Josef’s lips touch my skin, a chill, cold dread burst through me, and I closed my eyes, praying for Mick to put a stop to whatever was happening. I heard Mick shout “JOSEF!”, and simultaneously, I felt a sharp indrawn breath against my skin, then….. nothing.

Daring at last to open my eyes, I saw Josef, his back to the wall, fully vamped out, fangs barred, and eyes flashing silver. He growled at me one last time, then, like it was never there, the monster instantly melted away in front of my very eyes, fangs retracting, and eyes fading swiftly back to their usual deep golden brown. 

He cleared his throat rather loudly, “Whoah…..” he said, loosening his collar. “I must apologise for that little slip, Beth. I hadn’t realised I was still quite so……” he paused, “…hungry.” He flashed me an apologetic grin.

Flicking his gaze to Mick, he confirmed, “Beth is most definitely still one hundred percent…. human.”

Finally losing my temper, I glared at them both. “I could have told you that without the need for your little ‘test’.” Then, realising I was still standing there wearing nothing but a duvet, I shot Mick a ‘looks could kill’ stare. “If you would please fetch my clothes, I think I’d like to go home now.”

 

To be continued/………..


	13. A late spring cleaning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: This chapter PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 13

We spent the journey back to my apartment in silence. Mick had insisted on driving me back in my own car, adamant that it was not safe for me to be driving myself, when I’d just spent the last six hours or so in a state of unconsciousness.

It had shocked me to discover I’d been out for quite so long. Apparently Mick had tried to rouse me several times, but I’d been all but dead to the world, and nothing he’d done had managed to raise even a murmur. Although temporary loss of consciousness was not uncommon amongst freshies after a feeding, especially the first few times, when they had not yet become accustomed to the blood loss, it was usually only for a brief period, and accompanied by responses similar to those elicited during sleep. He’d finally panicked when he’d tasted blood in his mouth, and realised he’d nicked his tongue at some stage during the evening. What with the blood loss I’d endured during our lovemaking, coupled with the chance that I may have ingested a drop or two of his own blood when he’d kissed me, he’d put two and two together and come up with the frightening possibility that he might just have managed to do the unthinkable, and had unintentionally made exactly the same mistake that Josef had made with Sarah Whitley.

After three hours of waiting, and still no response, in desperation, he’d finally called Josef and begged him to come over. The rest, more or less, I knew. It wasn’t the situation itself that had made me so angry; I understood why Mick had needed Josef to verify I was still human; no, it was Mick’s reaction to me when he wasn’t sure if I’d been turned or not. I don’t know if he even realised he’d done it, but I was all too aware of how he’d held me at arms length when I’d tried to put my arms around him to comfort him.

Afterward, he’d apologised to me over and over, for putting me through the ordeal. He’d reached out to put his arms around me then, but I’d stepped back, hurt that he’d rejected me earlier, and unable to forgive him for it. I didn’t explain why I was so upset, and I think Mick thought it was mostly due to the scare Josef had given me when he’d vamped out so unexpectedly.

For his part, Josef had made a hasty retreat once he’d confirmed that I was still human. In typical Josef style, he’d made his best effort to make light of it, however although he put on a brazen front, I could see that underneath it all he was embarrassed at the way things had turned out. But to tell the truth, even though it had scared me, I didn’t blame Josef in the least for what had happened. His was simply a reaction; vampire to human. Not the same reaction that Mick would have had, which was why Mick had asked for Josef’s help. He knew that his own response was tempered by his feelings for me. He loved me, ergo he had no desire to eat me. He hadn’t even trusted himself to be able to tell if I was human or vampire, unsure as to whether he might be confusing hunger with desire. So he’d had Josef do it, and as soon as Josef had confirmed I was still human, he’d been so visibly relieved, and I, inexplicably, had felt decidedly wounded by his response.

So there I sat, staring steadfastly out of the window, tears pricking at my eyes, but refusing to so much as acknowledge Mick, even though I could feel his eyes burning a hole into my skull.

“Beth….. I don’t know what more to say..” he began.

“Then don’t say anything.” I cut him off before he could continue. I knew I was being unreasonable, but seemed unable to help myself. All I could think of was Mick’s reaction when he’d thought I might possibly be a vampire. His arms pushing me away. Rejecting me. Yet I couldn’t seem to bring myself to talk to him about it, unwilling to put my hurt into words, and choosing instead to brood inwardly.

As he pulled into my parking space I gathered up my things and made ready to get out of the car. Mick turned off the engine, removed the keys from the ignition, and held them out to me. Finally turning to look at him, I was taken aback at the forlorn expression on his face. 

“Thanks for driving me home.” I said, my anger relenting.

“Can I walk you to your door?” he asked.

“No, I think I can manage from here thanks.” I didn’t want to risk the possibility that I might cave in and ask him inside. I needed some time on my own to think.

He nodded, giving me a resigned smile. “Look after yourself Beth. Make sure you eat something, drink plenty of fluids, and if you need anything, anything at all, just call me.”

“I will.” I promised, taking the keys and stepping out of the car.

As I watched his retreating back heading off on foot in the direction of his loft, I felt an overwhelming desire just to run to him and throw myself into his arms. Instead, I sighed deeply, and turned away to make my way back to my empty apartment on my own.

 

Three times the next morning he tried to call me, and each time I ignored it, letting the answerphone pick up instead. Finally, worrying that Mick would come over if he thought something was wrong, I rang back, only to find that I got Mick’s answering service. Leaving a quick message just to say that I was sorry I’d missed his call, and that I was okay, I hung up. Turning my attention to some long overdue chores, I set to with a duster and cleaning cloth and attempted to take my mind off the situation as I began a late spring cleaning.

Up to my elbows in polish, my hair scraped back in a hasty ponytail to keep it out of my eyes, I was down on my hands and knees vigorously rubbing at the table legs when the doorbell went. Cursing that I’d ignored the calls earlier, I wondered whether or not it was worth trying to pretend I wasn’t at home. Realising though, that Mick could probably sense me through the door, coupled with the fact that my iPod was merrily blaring out my favorite cleaning tunes, I decided that answering the door was going to be unavoidable.

Brushing dust off my shirt and hurriedly pulling the ponytail out, I turned off the music and went to answer the door. Much as I didn’t want to admit it, I was relieved and excited at the thought of seeing Mick. I’d only been away from him for a few hours, and yet I was already missing him terribly. So much for time to think things over; I was ready to forgive him right now if it meant I could just feel his arms around me again.

Throwing the door open, I took a breath, ready to say my piece. The first word was almost out of my mouth when I realised it wasn’t Mick standing there holding a large bouquet of flowers in his arms. It was Josef.

“Oh…” my face dropped. Then quickly catching myself I turned on a bright welcoming smile. “Josef…. .”

His brown eyes regarded me warmly. “Nice to see you’re so disappointed to see me,” he remarked sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

“Oh…no…” I hastened to explain, “it’s not that…. I was just expecting you to be Mick, that’s all.”

“Well sorry to dash your hopes Beth,” he raised his eyebrows at me, “I came to apologize for the atrocious way I behaved last night. I really am truly sorry about what happened.” He held out the flowers, gazing at me in earnest, but not quite managing to hide the small smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth. 

I smiled, touched that he’d made the gesture, even though I wasn’t so sure about the sincerity of his apology. “You’re forgiven Josef.” I said, taking the proffered flowers and raising them to my nose to inhale their scent. “And how did you know I love freesias?”

“Lucky guess,” he replied, “that and they were on sale.”

I laughed. “They’re lovely Josef,” then, wondering if it was a good idea or not, “would you like to come in?”

“I thought you’d never ask,” he said, strolling in, hands stuffed nonchalantly in his pockets.

While I took the flowers into the kitchen and set about arranging them in a vase, Josef made himself comfortable on the couch, although he looked anything but at ease as he tapped his hand nervously on the arm.

“Would you like something to drink?” I asked him, before I realised what I was saying. “Ughh! Just pretend I didn’t say that!” I amended, blushing to the roots of my hair.

He snickered. “No thanks. But thanks for asking.”

“So…. um…. I’m guessing you have something else you wanted to say to me then?” I decided it was better to get straight to the point.

His face turned serious then. “Don’t be too hard on Mick, Beth. He really went through it last night. I’ve been there, I know how it feels, and believe me, it’s the worst feeling in the world. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.” 

He got up and went to stand over by the window. Choosing the shaded side, he leaned against the wall, crossing his legs and staring out at the street below. “When he called me, I couldn’t say no.”

“I’m sorry about Sarah, Josef, it must be hard…living with that.” 

For a long while he didn’t reply, then finally he turned around to look at me. His eyes shone with tears, and his voice wasn’t quite steady when he answered me. “Yeah….” 

He cleared his throat and began to pace up and down. “Sorry Beth…. I came here to apologise and now I’m dumping this on you.”

“It’s okay Josef. I really don’t mind. Talk to me if it helps.” 

He stopped pacing, pausing as if deep in thought, then suddenly “It’s Simone,” he blurted out.

“Ah… Simone.” I nodded in understanding. “She wants you to turn her?”

“I don’t know if I can,” he stated .

“You turned Mick,” I pointed out.

“Re-turned. There’s a difference. Mick needed me to help him, and I couldn’t turn down a friend in need. He’d have done the same for me.” He stopped pacing and looked at me apologetically. “I’m sorry I had to do it, Beth, but I really didn’t have a choice.”

“I don’t blame you Josef. I should be thanking you for saving my life.” I paused, realizing that I’d been blaming Mick for doing exactly that. “I can’t tell you what you should do about Simone, but I do know that sometimes you have to take a risk. If you don’t, you could be denying yourself the chance of ever finding real happiness again.” I looked at him questioningly. “Do you love her?”

He answered without hesitation, “Yes”, and I could see the conviction in his eyes as he said it. “But it’s not that simple……. if I commit to Simone….” he paused, an unhappy look on his face, “it’s….. it’s like I’m giving up on Sarah.”

Suddenly I had an insight as to why Josef was the way he was. The whole playboy attitude, and the uncaring façade he projected to the outside world, had been his way of protecting himself from ever having to get involved too deeply, and from betraying Sarah. The fact that Simone had defied the odds, and managed to slip through his defences, was a minor miracle in itself.

“Josef, you’ve put your life on hold for over fifty years, it’s time to think about the future. To think about yourself.” 

“Maybe you’re right…” he sighed.

There was a moment of awkward silence as we both searched for something to say.

I took a deep breath, “Mick doesn’t want to turn me.” I made it a statement.

He looked surprised. “Do you want to be turned?”

“Not at the moment, no, I just want to know that he’ll do it when….” I hesitated, “…. if…. the time comes.”

“He’ll do it Beth.”

“You sound awfully sure about that.” I wondered what Mick had said to Josef on the subject.

“Beth…. Mick might be an anti-vampire vampire, but he’s not a fool, I guarantee you. If it comes down to a choice between losing you or turning you, he’ll do it.”

“Have you two discussed this?” I asked.

“Last night, when we were talking, he was utterly distraught, Beth. He didn’t care if you were a vampire or a human. He just wanted you to wake up.”

I felt a lump rising in my throat as I stared dumbly at Josef, taking in what he’d just said.

“Thank you ….” I managed at last.

“By the way,” he said, perking up a bit, “speaking of last night….I meant to ask you about the bite. Mick said he took blood from you, but I didn’t notice any bite marks….at least not fresh ones. The one on your neck looks like it’s at least a couple of days old; it’s already started to heal.” He looked at me curiously.

I froze, my eyes going wide as I desperately searched for a suitable answer. Unfortunately my face must have said it all, because I saw his gaze dip below my waist for an instant, before he had to look away, trying unsuccessfully to hide a smile. Blushing furiously I looked around the room, grasping for something to say.

“Well…. thanks very much for the lovely flowers, but I’d better get on with the spring cleaning if I’m ever to get it finished.” I muttered, grabbing the nearest duster and spraying a liberal amount of polish straight into the speakers of my iPod docking station.

“Better go easy on the polish there…..” snickered Josef, as he sauntered past on his way towards the door. He paused with his hand on the door knob, a wicked grin spreading over his face, “Oh….. and the next time you and Mick decide to indulge in a bit of hanky panky, you might want to go easy on the ‘bitey’ stuff….that one’s renowned for knocking people out for the count…..”

As the door closed behind him I could hear his laughter echoing all the way down the hallway.

______

To be continued…..


	14. An accidental discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!  
> Rating: This chapter PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 14

Monday morning came, and still I’d heard nothing from Mick. My apartment was so clean it sparkled, my closet organized regimentally by type and colour, shoes paired up and arranged in neat rows, even my underwear was stacked neatly in the normally disorganised drawers. My CD collection was all but alphabetised and catalogued, and my kitchen cupboards were as orderly and pristine as they were ever likely to get.

I had plenty to occupy me at the office. Ben had asked me to investigate some more names, although he still wasn’t forthcoming as to exactly what I was looking for. I was to carry out a general search and profile, and discover as much information as possible on the subjects involved, cross-checking for any connections between them. Two of the names on the list rang a bell with me for some reason, although I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. No doubt the explanation would become clear during the course of my research.

By 4:30pm the case files were stacking up, and reams of paperwork on each individual were scattered across my desk. Collating together a stack of papers, I searched around for my stapler to bring them into some kind of order. Rummaging in vain through my drawers, my search came up fruitless, and I pushed back my chair and headed over to Ben’s office, where I knew he kept one in his top drawer. Ben was in court for the afternoon, and his office was locked, luckily however, I had a spare set of keys for emergencies, and even though my lack of stapler wasn’t exactly an emergency, I didn’t think he’d mind if I snuck in to borrow his for half an hour. 

Slipping the key into the lock, I let myself in and made a beeline for his desk. The drawer wasn’t locked, so I slid it open and peered inside, searching for the stapler. There was a wad of papers on top, so I lifted them aside, sifting through the contents until I found what I was looking for. Dropping the papers back down, I was just about to close the drawer and head out when something on the top sheet of paper caught my attention, and I hesitated, scanning the list of names with growing interest. Knowing I really shouldn’t be prying into Ben’s private things, I cast a quick glance toward the window, checking there was no one watching, and surreptitiously began to leaf through the pages. Most of the names meant nothing to me at all, but a few I recognised. Some were the names that Ben had asked me to make enquiries about, and a few, to my mounting unease, were people I’d met, or names I had heard mentioned by Mick or Josef, in connection with the vampire community here in L.A. My apprehension growing, I continued to skim through the list, my blood running cold as I read the final few names typed in stark, black ink on the sheet of white paper. Logan Griffen, Josef Kostan, and Mick St. John.

My heart thumping in my chest I had a quick look around, and, quickly pushing the drawer shut, I headed back to my desk. Swiftly stapling my papers together I shoved them into a folder and reached under my desk for my purse. After a little rummaging around, I finally located my cell phone, and, scanning the office to make sure no one was watching, I activated the camera function, slipping it into the palm of my hand. Picking up the stapler, I headed back to Ben’s office, trying to appear calm and unruffled, but inside my stomach was churning as I cast furtive glances around to check I wasn’t being observed.

Letting myself back into the office, I strolled as nonchalantly as possible over to the desk, opened the drawer, and leafing through the papers with one hand, proceeded to take hasty snapshots with the other, all the while keeping one wary eye on the outer office. It felt like it took forever, but at last I had snapped the last page, and slipping the phone back into the palm of my hand, I replaced the stapler and made a hasty exit. Just as I sat back down at my desk, I heard the bang of a door, and footsteps coming down the corridor. As I glanced up, Ben nodded and smiled to me in greeting, and I smiled back as casually as I could manage, although my face felt like it was on fire with the sudden rush of blood at nearly having been caught. I let out a huge sigh of relief as he disappeared into his office.

My mind was racing at the possibilities. This had to be a list of all the vampires living in L.A. didn’t it? Did Ben know that? Or was he asking me to look into connections between the names because he didn’t know? Where had the list come from? How long had Ben had it? Emma had threatened to reveal the names, but surely she hadn’t had the chance, and if she had, then certainly Ben would know the correlation, and why would he need me to research them? The one thing I did know for certain, was that Mick needed to know, and he needed to know soon.

I cleared my desk and grabbed my jacket, pausing at Ben’s office to let him know I was off home and that I’d have his reports ready for him in the morning. As soon as I was out of sight of his office, I raced out to the parking lot as fast as my legs would carry me, and pulled my cell phone out the second I was in the car. Mick’s number went straight to voicemail, and I briefly pondered calling Josef, then decided to go straight to Mick’s and wait, in the hope he was either tied up in his office with a client, or on his way back home. The traffic was snarled up, so it took me longer than expected to get there, but finally I pulled up at Mick’s brownstone building, disappointed to see that Mick’s car wasn’t in it’s usual parking slot. Lack of car notwithstanding, I made my way up, dialling Mick’s number again as I waited for the elevator to reach his floor. It went straight to voicemail again, and I cursed in frustration.

As soon as the doors opened I was out and hammering on the door like my life depended on it. And maybe Mick’s did. I got no response and tried the office door as well. When there was still no response, I leant against the wall and let myself slide to the floor in defeat. Maybe Josef would know where Mick was? Luckily I had Josef’s office number stored on my phone. Whether I would get through or not was another matter. I listened to it ring for a couple of seconds, then it was briskly answered by a very efficient sounding woman.

“Mr Kostan’s office. How may I help you?”

“It’s Beth Turner here. I need to speak to Mr Kostan; and please can you tell him it’s urgent.” I crossed my fingers, and prayed she’d put me through.

So much for prayers…. “Mr Kostan is in a meeting at present, may I take a message?”

I took a deep breath, “No, no message, I need to speak to him now. Please can you tell him who’s calling and make sure he knows it’s a matter of extreme urgency. I’m sure he’ll take the call.” I wasn’t at all sure he would, but it was worth trying the bluff.

The woman on the other end sounded very firm, “Mr Kostan said no interruptions. I’ll give him your message as soon as he’s out of his meeting.”

I took the bull by the horns, “If you don’t put me through right now, I promise you I will come over, in person, and force my way in, and I’ll make sure that Mr Kostan knows exactly why it was necessary.” I hoped I sounded sufficiently sincere, although I wasn’t sure I wouldn’t actually carry out my threat is she refused to put me through again.

There was a slight pause, then she spoke in a rather affronted tone, “I’ll see if I can interrupt. Please hold.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, I waited, until finally Josef’s rather displeased voice came on the line, demanding to know what was so important that he’d been dragged out of his meeting.

“Josef……” it was such a relief to finally get through, “I’m really sorry, but I can’t find Mick, and there’s something I need to tell you that really can’t wait. I don’t want to discuss it over the phone though, is there any way you can meet me?”

“Beth…” he sounded dubious, “this is a really important meeting..”

“Josef, please. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t urgent.” 

I heard him sigh. “Okay… where are you?”

“I’m at Mick’s, but…..”

He cut me off mid sentence, “I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.” Abruptly the phone went dead.

“…but he’s not here..” I finished lamely, looking at the phone in exasperation. Great! 

I had just settled back against the wall to wait, when the elevator dinged and out stepped the most captivating man I’d ever seen. Crisis or no, the sight of him sauntering towards me in a pair of tight black jeans that showed off his well muscled legs to a tee, had me mesmerised and gawping like a teenager salivating over her screen idol. Wavy dark brown hair framed his well chiselled features, and his eyes, seeming to reflect the colour of the cobalt shirt he wore, appeared a startling blue, framed by long dark lashes. His shoulders were broad, as was his chest, and his well defined abdomen tapered to a narrow waist and hips. I was too busy gazing at him to notice that I was sitting on the floor with my mouth hanging open, and it wasn’t until his boots came to a halt a few inches away from my feet, that I snapped out of my reverie, and attempted to recall the purpose of my visit..

“Beth…” he smiled down at me, looking all too pleased at the effect he had on me.

“Mick..” I scrambled to my feet, sobering up as reality kicked in, and I remembered the reason I was here, “we need to talk. Can we go inside?”

 

To be continued/…………………….

 

_______________________


	15. If you'll have me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: This chapter PG-13 (overall NC-17)
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 15

Mick sat across from me in the chair. He was deep in thought, legs crossed, head turned to the side, his hand pressed absently to his chin. He looked so sad, and I hated that I’d been the one to cause the change. Just minutes earlier when we’d met in the hallway, he’d seemed so happy and relaxed, and I’d have done anything not to have had to tell him about what I’d discovered in Ben’s office.

His eyes flicked back to me, and he seemed to make a decision. “Josef needs to know about this. Every person on that list needs to know.”

“Oh….” I’d forgotten to mention that I’d called Josef earlier, “Josef’s already on his way. I panicked when I couldn’t contact you, so I dragged him out of a meeting. He should be here any minute.”

As if on cue, the buzzer went, and Mick got up to answer it. Josef swept through the door with a scowl on his face and a decidedly harassed air about him, demanding to know why his precious time was being used up on non money-making business. However, on catching sight of Mick’s face, and taking one look at me, he obviously took in the seriousness of the situation, and looked worriedly from one of us to the other. His brows knitted together, and his eyes flicked back and forth between us, as he asked in a concerned voice, “What happened?”

“Sit down Josef”, Mick gestured toward the couch where I was seated, and Josef sat down beside me, a look of growing apprehension on his face.

I put my hand on Josef’s arm, “Thanks for coming.” 

“No problem,” he said, smiling at me warmly, and surprising me for once with his lack of witty sarcasm. He turned away to look at Mick expectantly.

“Beth….?” Mick nodded to me, and Josef’s head immediately swivelled back in my direction, fixing me with an intent look.

I hesitated for a split second, caught momentarily by the intensity of Josef’s gaze. I shook my head to clear it, and concentrated on giving him a brief summary of what I’d just gone through with Mick. He listened intently, but if was hard to gauge his reaction from the expression, or more accurately, the lack of it, on his face. When I finished, he was silent for a few seconds, then, with an innocent smile beginning to play at the corners of his mouth, he gave a typically inane Josef style response.

“So, you want me to take care of the D.A.?”

I knew Josef was alluding to the photographer he had ‘taken care’ of for me a few weeks earlier, but the sarcastic remark was lost on Mick, who remained thankfully unaware of the favour I’d asked of his friend. 

Mick looked like an exasperated parent dealing with an errant child, as he fixed Josef with an angry glare. “This is SERIOUS Josef!”

The smile gradually slid off Josef’s face, and his face was solemn when he addressed Mick, “Mick… from what Beth just said, it appears he doesn’t even know what connects the people on that list. If it was Emma who sent it, then it looks like she never got the chance to fill Talbot in on the details. And if it wasn’t her, then my guess is that someone wants to use it as leverage. They can’t do that if they’ve already sold us out, so they send the list and threaten to reveal our secret if they don’t get what they want. From the fact that we’ve received no threat, it makes sense that whoever sent it is no longer around to be in a position to intimidate us. Emma certainly fits the bill on that one. It‘s also highly unlikely that anyone outside the vampire community would be able to discover all of those names. This has to be an inside job.”

Mick stood up and started to pace restlessly in front of us. “And what if it wasn’t Emma, Josef? What if someone’s just playing us with this? Waiting for the right moment to hold it over our heads. It could be anyone. We don’t know for certain that Talbot doesn’t already know. Being told that vampires exist can’t be an easy pill to swallow; he could just be trying to gather some evidence to support it.” 

“Look…..we could spend all day second guessing ourselves,” Josef replied, leaning back against the couch, “the fact is, I have absolutely no intention of re-inventing myself right now….I’m bang in the middle of a massive deal, and I could really do without ‘dying’ at short notice. Besides… it’s Simone’s birthday next Saturday, and it’s more than my life’s worth to cancel the party. She’d kill me!” He turned to me and gave a hen-pecked grin, “You know what women can be like…”

I laughed despite the gravity of the situation, “You’ve really got it bad don’t you?”

He just looked at me and puckered his face comically in reply.

“It needn’t come to that Josef,” said Mick “but I think we need to be prepared for the worst. Maybe get some new ID ready in case we need it quickly. Decide on a plan of action if we need to leave L.A….” he glanced at me as he said it, and for the first time it occurred to me that this could be the beginning of the end for Mick and I. If he was forced to move on, where would that leave us?

Josef let out a sigh, running his hand over his hair in a gesture of resignation. “I guess it won’t hurt to be prepared….. I know someone who handles re-locations, I can have him prepare the necessary papers just in case.” His gaze flicked to me, “What about you Beth?”

“Me?” I looked at Josef, confused.

“Well…if the worst comes to the worst, and Mick has to re-locate, you can’t very well continue to see each other, or you’d provide a lead straight to him. We’d have to assume that whoever is behind this threat knows about your relationship.” He paused, looking from me to Mick for some kind of response, but neither of us was forthcoming. “If you’re planning on staying together, we’ll need to re-locate the both of you.”

I didn’t know what to say. I opened and closed my mouth without any words coming out. It wasn’t something I’d considered, or even thought about until now. I’d always assumed that if Mick was ever forced to move on, that would be the end for us. But that was before the events of the last few days. I knew how I felt about it…. I’d follow Mick anywhere. I’d re-locate to the arctic if necessary… well maybe Alaska….The question was, would he want that too? I glanced at Mick, hoping for some kind of clue as to how he felt, but he just looked back at me, saying nothing, his face sombre as I struggled to come up with an answer.

Sensing my predicament, Josef waved a hand dismissively, getting to his feet and preparing to leave. “No problem, you can let me know later. Just give me a call when you’ve made your decision. In the meantime, try to find out what you can from Talbot about those names he asked you to look into,” he paused on his way to the door, adding, as if as an afterthought, “and don’t go giving him any information that could compromise anyone, or link them together.”

I raised my eyebrows at him pointedly, “Do I look like an idiot?”

He started to say something, then stopped short, giving me a sardonic grin, “Well.. you never can be too careful……. Anyway, I have things to do, people to see, and time won’t wait. Bye Beth,” he nodded in my direction, then turned to Mick, giving him a rather pointed look, “Mick…”

As the door swung shut Mick and I looked at one another. I went to speak, but Mick started to say something at the same time, and we both stopped short. He raised his eyebrows and gestured with his hand that I should go first. It was strange… even as close as we’d become over the last few days, the short time we’d been apart seemed to have erected a barrier between us, and as much as I wanted just to go to him and put my arms around him, and in turn to feel his arms around me, I hesitated, unsure as to what reception I would get.

I stood up, wondering if I should leave now that we’d finished discussing what I’d come to talk about. I half turned toward the door, hesitating, in two minds as to how to proceed, when something made me turn back.

“I missed you….” I blurted out.

“Me too.” He gave me a shy smile.

“I’m sorry I ignored your calls… I needed some time to think,” I bit my lip nervously, “if you want to know the truth, I was upset because it seemed like you wouldn’t have felt the same way about me if I had turned out to be a vampire. Did I imagine that?” I looked at him questioningly, “Was I just over reacting? Or did you push me away when I went to hug you?”

“No…..you didn’t imagine it,” he was looking me directly in the eye, “but it wasn’t what you thought. I wouldn’t love you any less if I turned you…. I was just horrified at the thought that I might have done it accidentally… without your consent. I think I thought that you might reject me for doing that to you. That’s why I didn’t let you hug me….. I didn’t think I deserved it. I’m sorry…” He sighed heavily, putting his hands on his hips as he stared at the floor and shook his head.

“I want to come with you,” I stated. He looked up, a slightly confused look on his face. “If you have to re-locate I mean…. I want to come with you….” I held my breath, praying that the answer to my question would be yes, “if you’ll have me….?”

“Beth….” he was across the room in the blink of an eye, and his arms went around me, hugging me tight for what seemed like the first time in absolutely ages. I pressed my face into his chest and breathed in his smell, delighting in the feel of his shirt against my cheek as I wrapped my arms tightly about his waist and closed my eyes. His voice was choked with emotion as he answered my question, “Of course I’ll have you….”

For a long time we just stood there, not moving, holding onto each other like our lives depended on it, until finally I pulled back slightly to look up at him. The love I saw in his eyes as he looked back at me took my breath away, and inexplicably I suddenly felt a lump rise in my throat. I’d never loved anyone the way I loved Mick. He wasn’t just my lover, he was my friend, my guardian angel, and the love of my life, all rolled into one. I don’t know what I did to deserve him, I just thank my lucky stars for the twist of fate that brought him to me all those years ago. I despised Coraline for what she’d done to me, but the fact was that without her, I wouldn’t be with the man who was now the most precious thing to me in the whole world. The fact that I could nearly have lost all of that because of a silly misunderstanding, filled me with dismay.

I tried to hold it back, but a stifled sob escaped me, and Mick raised his hand to gently wipe away a tear as it spilled over and ran hotly down my cheek. “What’s wrong Beth….. why are you crying?” he asked me, concern etched all over his face, as my face crumpled and the tears began to fall in earnest.

“I’m just so happy…” I choked out between muffled sobs, feeling like the worst cliché in the world. “Oh.. that sounds so cheesy…” I shook my head, starting to laugh despite myself, and he pulled me back into the circle of his arms, squeezing me tight as he stroked my hair, and placed a tender kiss on my forehead. 

Disentangling myself slightly, I wiped at the tears on my face, feeling rather foolish at my sudden display of emotion. “So stupid….” I muttered.

“Beth…. no….. it’s not stupid at all,” Mick caught my chin and turned my face to his. He gazed at me intently, and all I could think was how beautiful his eyes looked. The shirt he wore seemed to reflect the light, lending the impression that his eyes were the same startling blue, although I could have sworn they were hazel the last time I’d looked. I could get lost in those fascinating eyes… they melted my heart as they stared into mine, and I found myself mesmerised, staring in wonder at the long lashes framing the radiant blue irises. He must have realised my mind was wandering, because he smiled, asking, “what?”

“Oh…. I was just thinking how I might approach Ben about that list tomorrow..” I fibbed, looking away.

“No you weren’t!” he accused, laughing as though he could read my mind.

I blushed, scuffing my foot as I tried not to smile, “Okay… so maybe I wasn’t…”

“What were you thinking about then?” he asked in a rather lecherous tone of voice, and I laughed.

“Not that!”

“I could make you tell me, you know,” he threatened, pulling me against him, trapping me once more in the circle of his arms, “using my vampire persuasion skills….” his voice trailed off, and he ran his tongue suggestively over his teeth. “Resistance would be……” he paused, smirking, as he slid his hands up under my shirt and undid the clasp of my bra, “…… futile…” he finished.

"Trekkie!" I accused, gasping as his hands moved around to my front and skimmed over my breasts.

"Takes one to know one..." he beamed triumphantly. "Are you ready to give in?"

I shook my head vigorously. “No way I’m ever telling… you’re just going to have to beat it out of me….”

 

To be continued/…………………….

 

_______________________


	16. Surrender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: This chapter NC-17
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 16

Looking back from where I am now, I wish with all my heart that I’d never set eyes on that accursed list. For it was to set in motion a chain of events that would have a catastrophic effect on all our lives. It’s ironic to think that if only I’d been able to find my own stapler that day, my life could have been so different. I might still be human for one thing. I might still be happy. 

Luckily, at the time, I was blissfully unaware of how future events were to unfold…..

 

*****************************

 

I screamed at the top of my voice, kicking out with my feet, and pushing ineffectually at Mick’s shoulders in an effort to push him away from me.

“NO!” I yelled, thrashing from side to side, “Get off me!”

There was no let up, as he pinned my legs with the lower half of his body, and continued with his assault. “Are you ready to give up?”

“This is so unfair! Especially when you’re not ticklish.” I retorted, renewing my struggle, and clamping my arms to my sides as he took the opportunity to attack my armpits.

“Didn’t anyone ever tell you that us vampires are sneaky and not to be trusted?” he replied, smiling evilly as he cocked an eyebrow.

“Okay I give up!” I shrieked, gulping in a breath of much needed air, as Mick finally let up the relentless torture, and looked at me expectantly.

Still breathing hard, my chest rising and falling in an exaggerated fashion with each breath, I let my head fall back against the floor, and tried to catch my breath. Gazing up into Mick’s face, I studied his features, feeling such a depth of love for him as I would never have thought possible. At this distance I could see every pore of his skin in fine detail, and my eyes soaked it all up adoringly. His hair flopped over his forehead and hung forward in loose waves about his face, and I reached out my hand to run my fingers through the silky softness of it, wondering what I had done to deserve this man. Trailing my fingers down the side of his face I felt the roughness of stubble on his cheeks and ran my fingertips across the bristles, pausing at the slight cleft in his chin, and stretching out my thumb to brush lightly over the smooth skin of his lips.

As I raised my eyes slowly to his, he was looking at me curiously, a slight furrow appearing between his brows. Only inches away from mine, the mosaic mixture of browns, yellows, blues and greens, showed in fine detail in his extraordinary eyes, framed to perfection by enviously long dark lashes.

“You really do have the most beautiful eyes you know…” I stared up at him, enchanted.

“If you’re trying to distract me it’s not going to work,” he grinned, “come on… tell me what you were thinking.” He raised an eyebrow, waiting for an answer.

I smiled. “That was what I was thinking….”

He did a quick double-take, “What? That I have beautiful eyes?” He didn’t quite look like he believed me.

“Yeah..”, I blushed, “I kind of got lost in them back there for a moment.” Then feeling a bit embarrassed that I was behaving like a besotted fool, I added, “Doesn’t mean I like you or anything though…”

He grinned from ear to ear, looking thoroughly pleased with himself. “Then you probably don’t want me to do this..” his eyes flicked to my mouth as he lowered his face to mine and kissed me softly.

“No.. definitely not…that was horrible,” I countered, even as a sudden bolt of longing caught me unawares, and my insides clenched so strongly I couldn’t breathe for a moment.

“Or this…” he continued, kissing his way down my throat, and beginning to unbutton my shirt. Eyes tightly shut, I arched my back in ecstasy and threw back my head as he trailed a line of hot, wet kisses down between my breasts.

“No…..” I muttered, gasping as his mouth moved to my nipple and he ran his tongue in slow deliberate circles around the tip, “…I’m hating every minute of it…..”

“Good, because I wouldn’t want you to be enjoying yourself...” he replied, kissing his way down my stomach, pausing at the waistband of my jeans to run his tongue around my navel, as I shivered in response. As he reached to undo the button, I sat up and grabbed a fistful of his shirt, pulling him to me, and kissing him soundly on the mouth.

“My turn I think..”, I said, reversing our positions, and pushing him down onto the rug. Straddling his hips, and effectively pinning him to the floor, I began to unbutton his shirt, lavishing him with the same kisses he had not so long ago showered on me. I ran my hands through the coating of hair on his chest, loving the way it felt under my fingertips as I caressed my way over his well defined pecs, and carried on down over his abdominal muscles. Running my lips lightly over his skin, pressing little kisses as I went, I reached the point where his jeans met his stomach, feeling him jerk slightly, and I glanced up to see him much as I had been just moments ago. Head thrown back and eyes closed, his lips parted slightly and a look of joyful relaxation on his face.

Hesitantly, I laid my hand over the hardness of him, still covered by his jeans, and caressed slowly up and down his length, hearing his sudden intake of breath, and feeling a shiver run through his body. I quickly unbuckled his belt and loosened the buttons below, freeing him, and pulling the material aside. Lowering my mouth to his stomach once more I pressed light kisses onto his skin and began to tug his jeans down over his hips. He lifted himself from the floor slightly so that I could pull them over his hips, then, smiling, he sat up and swiftly removed his boots so that I could finish the job. 

Tossing his jeans away, I turned back to him, putting put a finger on his chest and pushing him firmly back to the floor.

“Don’t you think you’re a bit overdressed?” he asked, eyeing me from his prone position on the rug.

I stood up, kicking off my shoes, and quickly unbuttoned my jeans and slipped them off, glad that for once I had on a decent pair of panties, then finished unfastening my already half open shirt, and threw it in a heap with the rest of the discarded clothes.

“Better?“ I inquired, echoing Mick’s own words from the other night.

“You’ll do,” he replied cheekily, a wicked glint in his eye.

I picked up my shirt and threw it at him, “You’re going to regret that.” I teased, feigning offense..

“I can’t wait…” balling the shirt up, he threw it back at me, a salacious grin spreading over his face.

As I watched him with a mixture of amusement and longing, he raised his hips and removed his boxers in one quick movement, laying back against the rug in all his naked glory, and regarding me with a look that belied his recent teasing.

My eyes locked on Mick’s, I reached down and slipped my panties off, tossing them aside to stand naked before him. I could feel his eyes roaming over my body, and I had a moment of self doubt, wondering if he could possibly find me as beautiful as I found him.

Casting aside the doubt, I stepped forward and dropped to my knees in front of him, edging myself between his legs and crawling up until I rested between his thighs. I lay the palms of my hands, one on each of his legs, and bent forward to kiss either side of the swelling at his groin, feeling him jerk slightly as I touched his skin. I carefully licked a wet line up and around the skin of his stomach, tracing the outline of him, but never quite touching. Again I repeated this action, hearing his indrawn breath as I moved closer this time, but never quite made contact.

Moving down, I put my tongue against the base of him and licked upwards in one long movement, feeling him quiver violently in response, before swirling my tongue over the drop of glistening moisture at the tip, savouring the slight saltiness of it. Emboldened by his initial reaction, I wrapped my hand around the length of him, hearing his breath hiss out as I did so. Lifting him towards me slightly I took him in my mouth and began to work him with my lips and tongue. Slowly at first, I drew my mouth along the length of him, feeling his skin like velvet against my lips, then pushed back down as far as I could go, all the while snaking my tongue along the hardness of him. I quickened the pace and heard his breath start to come in short bursts as I deliberately slid my tongue back and forth over the sensitive skin on the underside of the tip. Then, using my other hand to firmly massage two fingers against the base of him, I was gratified to hear him gasp out loud. 

“Oh my God……. Beth.. This is going to be a one second wonder if you keep this up..” 

I stopped what I was doing, “Do you want me to stop?” I asked, not sure whether or not he wanted me to continue.

“God....no…..but I want to make love to you Beth,” he sat up, pulling me with him until I was straddled across his lap, then, taking my face in his hands, he pressed his lips to mine and kissed me deeply. My mouth opened under the insistent pressure of his tongue, and I kissed him back with a fervour that surprised even me. 

Kissing me all the while, Mick proceeded to push me back until I was laying down on the rug, covering me with his body, and grinding himself against me, so that I writhed in another sudden onslaught of desire. I wrapped my arms around his body, my hands roving over his hard, muscled back, down to feel the firmness of his buttocks and back up over his shoulders and down his arms, needing to touch and feel every part of him. My legs had wound themselves around the lower part of his body, and I was panting with the need to have him inside me.

He broke off the kiss, and propping himself up on one elbow, reached down with his other hand and stroked a finger over the most sensitive part of me, eliciting a gasp of pure longing from me in response. Parting my folds, he encountered me already slick and wet for him, and slipping one finger inside me, he used his thumb to stroke over the sensitive bundle of nerves at my center, until my breath was coming out in short bursts and I was practically shaking with desire.

“Mick….” I managed to utter, reaching to encircle him with my fingers. I guided him toward me, inhaling sharply as I felt the velvet smoothness of him brush against my skin tantalisingly. He adjusted his position slightly and used his hand to open me up to him, sliding inside with agonising slowness until at last I felt the whole of him, filling me completely.

Wrapping my legs around him, I used my heels to push him deeper down inside me, moaning out loud at the sensations the movement produced. Looking up, I noticed Mick had his eyes shut, a look of fierce concentration on his face, as he remained still and unmoving.

I stopped moving, my voice worried as I asked, “Mick?” 

With what looked like a huge effort, he opened his eyes and regarded me with a look of such potent hunger and desire, that I was almost afraid. Almost. I knew Mick would never hurt me. I trusted him completely and utterly.

His eyes flashed silver for a second, and he closed them, his brow furrowing as I guessed he attempted to quell the beast rising within him. After a few seconds, he opened them again, and they were back to their usual slate blue. I understood why he was doing this….he obviously didn’t want to risk biting me after what had happened the other day… but it saddened me to see that he felt the need to suppress that part of him now.

“I’m okay Beth….” he managed at last. Presumably satisfied that the vampire side of him was held in check, Mick leaned down and touched his lips to mine in a kiss of such sweetness, that emotion surged up inside me, and before I knew what was happening, my eyes had welled up with tears, and I felt them running hotly down my cheeks even as we kissed.

Slowly he began to move inside me, and I clung to him desperately, feeling the first stirrings of my impending orgasm at each upward stroke. Our mouths were still locked firmly together in a kiss that was growing fiercer by the moment. Our tongues danced together as we explored each other’s mouths, feeding from one another as our movements became more frantic. Mick’s hand slid down my stomach and into the curls covering my centre, as his thumb searched out the swollen nub there. Breaking our kiss momentarily, he brought his thumb to his mouth, and using saliva to moisten it, stroked me over and over until I was poised, once again, on the edge of the abyss. I could hear his breath coming faster and faster, and knew he must be close too.

Without warning, an intense heat began to blossom and spread from my core, and my breath hitched in as I was carried over the edge along waves and waves of pleasure that rippled mercilessly through my body. I felt Mick still, his own breath catching as he let out a strangled moan, and shuddering, emptied himself inside me. Caught in the middle of my own orgasm, my muscles convulsed around him, and floating high as I was on a euphoric cloud at the time, I opened my eyes, wanting to watch him as he came.

His mouth was open in a perfect ‘O’, eyes closed, and his brow furrowed in concentration. For several seconds I gazed on, watching him without his being aware of it, as we rode out our orgasm together. Until, at last, the waves began to slow, and he finally collapsed, exhausted, on top of me, his face buried in my neck, and his arms wrapped tightly around my body.

We lay like that for a little while, regaining our breath, and enjoying the feel of one another’s damp bodies pressed together in unison. Then, reluctantly, Mick withdrew from me and rolled slightly to one side, so that we ended up lying on our sides facing each other, with our legs still tangled together and our arms resting about each other’s waists. 

Our foreheads were practically touching as Mick leant in towards me and placed a tender kiss against my lips. “I love you…” he said, simply.

“I love you too, Mick St. John,” I whispered back, “so, so much….”

His face split into a wide grin. “I thought you said you didn’t like me… or anything…?”

Giving him a devious smile, I raised my eyebrows, “Yeah well…..I lied….”

_________________________

To be continued/……………….


	17. An unanswered question

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: This chapter PG-13
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 17

Flames from the fire flickered and danced, casting leaping shadows on the wall in the near darkness. I watched them play, idly twirling a finger in circles on Mick’s chest, around and around, winding the hair in an action that was almost mesmerizing. We were still lying on the rug, my head resting on Mick’s shoulder as I lay on my side with my leg thrown over his. He lay on his back, propped up against the cushions we’d pulled off of the couch to make ourselves more comfortable, his arm about my shoulders, holding me close even as he slept. At least I assumed he was sleeping.

I hadn’t even known he could sleep, but I’d drifted off myself, and when I’d awoken his eyes were closed and he was breathing so slowly and shallowly that at first I’d thought he’d stopped altogether. His heartbeat, that had been so strong at first, had slowed until I could only discern a slight murmur that seemed to be coming at longer and longer intervals. It was quite a strange experience for me, and, I had to admit, also a very unnerving one. The temptation to awaken him was almost overwhelming, but I resisted, partly because I’d never seen him sleep before, and I was honestly intrigued, and partly because I just wanted this time alone with Mick, to savour the intimacy, the closeness, the whole experience of being with him in a way as close to a normal human relationship as I’d ever dreamed possible.

I shivered slightly, drawing up the blanket that Mick had fetched for me, and snuggling into it’s warmth gratefully. Mick’s skin, which although earlier in the evening had been warm and alive to the feel, was now cool to the touch and provided no source of comfort. Still, I reached out my arm and laid it across his chest protectively, hoping to warm him with the heat from my own body. I lay like that for a few minutes, holding onto him and listening to his heartbeat and the soft sounds of his breathing, even as it slowed and his breaths became fewer and far between. When they stopped completely, my own heart seemed to suddenly leap in my chest, and I sat up in a panic. Knowing that he didn’t need to breathe didn’t seem to help; all my instincts were telling me that something was wrong, and I didn’t seem able to override them. I couldn’t help myself, I laid a hand on his shoulder and shook him gently.

“Mick….. wake up..” my voice was shaking as I said it.

His eyes flew open instantly, “Beth… what’s wrong?” he was sitting up and looking around, immediately on guard for danger.

My hand flew to my mouth in relief as soon as I saw him awake, and at once I regretted having disturbed him out of my foolish need to reassure myself that he was all right. “Don’t worry… nothing’s wrong,” I assured him, “I’m sorry I woke you. You just stopped breathing and I got frightened… stupid…”

He visibly relaxed, reaching to take me in his arms and hug me tight. “Beth… I’m sorry, I should have warned you..”

I hugged him back fiercely, clinging to him and pressing a kiss into his neck as I wound my fingers through his hair and drew his head back so I could look at him.

“It’s okay.. I should have realised. I mean it’s obvious vampires don’t need to breathe, right?” I laughed, kissing him.

“There’re a lot of things I should have told you about,” he said as he drew me back down onto the cushions, nestling me into the crook of his arm as he drew the blanket up around my shoulders and pressed his lips to my forehead tenderly, “.. but everything…us… seemed to happen so quickly.. and somehow I just never got around to it.”

I looked up at him, “Oh… what…things like telling your girlfriend about how you get your best friend to scare her senseless while he checks out she’s not been accidentally turned into a vampire?” I joked, then instantly regretted it when I saw the expression on Mick’s face.

I sat up and took his hand, “Mick, I didn’t mean to bring it up again…. I’m sorry… it’s water under the bridge now. It’s actually quite funny when you think about it…” my voice trailed off as Mick pulled his hand from mine and pulled himself up to lean against the couch, crossing his arms over his chest in a decidedly defensive looking gesture.

I tried again, “I mean, Josef said that bite often has that effect on people, so the whole thing could have been avoided if you’d just told him…”

“JOSEF said??” His head had snapped around as he realised what I’d said. “When exactly were you speaking to Josef about our sex life?” He fixed me with disbelieving stare.

I just seemed to be digging myself a deeper hole, but I tried to explain. “Well… I didn’t actually tell him… he just sort of guessed..”

“And how did you come to be discussing it in the first place? When did you see him?”

I’d never seen Mick like this before, so his reaction caught me off guard somewhat, but I supposed under the circumstances he had a right to know why I’d been discussing our private life with his best friend.

“He came to see me to apologise for vamping out like that…well at least that’s what he said… I think he just wanted to talk about Simone to be honest.. The conversation just happened to get around to the bite…” I paused, a little unnerved at the way Mick was glaring at me, “…he couldn’t understand how come the only visible bite on me had nearly healed..”

He raised his eyebrows at me pointedly.

“I didn’t say a thing… honest!” I was beginning to feel like I was on trial here, “He just started laughing and told me that ‘that one’ always has people out for the count… or something like that.” I glanced at him nervously, and tried to change tack, “Mostly we talked about Simone.. I think he wants to turn her, but he’s worried he won’t be able to.” Now I felt guilty for telling Mick Josef’s secrets. Great.

Mick rubbed his hand over his face, and held his arms out to me, “Sorry Beth…I didn’t mean to accuse you… it’s just...I don’t know.. I just didn’t know you and Josef …” he paused for a moment, “… got on so well.”

I breathed a sigh of relief and gladly snuggled back into his embrace. “Oh.. I like Josef well enough, he’s a great guy. I can see why he’s your best friend. But in no way do I fancy him or anything..” I added, “he’s really not my type.” That last part wasn’t strictly true. I did find Josef attractive, but no way would I ever think of acting on it. He was in love with Simone, and I with Mick, and that’s all there was to it.

I felt Mick’s lips move in my hair as he planted a kiss on top of my head, and I looked up and smiled, grateful to see Mick grin back at me. I laid my head in the crook of his shoulder and resumed making lazy circles on his chest with my finger, feeling him begin to make the same movement up and down my arm. 

For a few minutes, neither of us spoke; we just watched the fire flicker and listened to the ticking of the old carriage clock sitting on the sideboard. It would probably have been sensible to leave it like that, enjoying the companionable silence and drifting off to sleep once more, but Mick had mentioned ‘things’ that he hadn’t told me about, and my curiosity aroused, I felt it was as good a time as any to ask him some questions.

“So…speaking of things you should have told me about…” I paused, trying to think how to phrase the question, “…the biting stuff…you’re okay with still doing that with me, right? I mean.. what happened the other night doesn’t mean you won’t ever again?”

I practically held my breath waiting for his response. The thought that he might never bite me again was too awful to contemplate. When he’d bitten me the first time we made love, it had felt so wonderful, and I’d felt such a connection with him, not just physically, but emotionally too, that the thought of it never happening again was almost unbearable.

“Well…” I looked up and saw his embarrassed smile as he answered my question, “I might not try that particular bite again anytime soon… but I wasn’t planning on never biting you again, no.”

“Oh thank God…” I breathed, not even bothering to hide my relief, “I thought maybe because you didn’t do it tonight, that would be it.”

He caught my chin then, gently turning my face up to look at him, and promptly started laughing. The cheeky monkey was laughing at me!

“So I give good bite do I?” he snickered, trying unsuccessfully to stop grinning.

I opened my mouth to reply, but wasn’t sure what to say, so I shut it again, and settled for a meaningful scowl instead. 

“Nice to know I havn’t lost my touch.. I used to have freshies queuing up back in the day you know” he giggled.

That did it. Attack is always the best form of defence, so I launched one immediately. Sitting up and pulling the blanket up to cover me, I rounded on him. “On the subject of freshies Mick… exactly how many ‘freshies’ did you have ‘back in the day’? Exactly how many is ‘not many’?”

Caught off guard, he sat up straight, and gave me that wary look he always did when I questioned him about his past life. “Hey, what’s with the Spanish Inquisition all of a sudden?”

“Ten, twenty, thirty?” I paused, raising my eyebrows at him, wordlessly asking whether I should continue upwards or not.

He leaned back against the couch, and let his head drop back, sighing heavily. I could see him making quick calculations in his head as his eyes flicked back and forth. Finally he sat up, looking at me somewhat cautiously. “Ermmm… about a hundred or so?”

I looked at him incredulously. “A HUNDRED?!” 

“Well.. you did ask!”

“I know, but a HUNDRED?” My mouth dropped open, and once again I couldn’t think of a single thing to say.

“Look.. I’ve been a vampire for over fifty years now. It’s only in the last twenty or so years that I’ve been off the fresh stuff. That’s thirty odd years of freshies to account for… less than four a year. Not that many when you look at it like that.” He shrugged, giving me a mollifying look. “You can only drink from humans about twice a week without making them ill, so Josef always had plenty of girls on tap. That, and there was never a shortage of girls willing to volunteer for the… job.”

“That makes sense.” I said thoughtfully. “Tuesdays and Fridays…”

He frowned at me questioningly.

“Simone… Josef said he usually only drank from her on Tuesdays and Fridays. I see why now… twice a week.” I did some of my own calculations. “Oh… okay, that’s why you fought it off earlier tonight then?”

He nodded. “Yes.”

“You can do that then? Fight it off?”

“Apparently so.” He looked me straight in the eye as he said it, and he wasn’t laughing now. “I’ve never tried to in that situation before… I’ve never been in that situation before..”

“Oh?” I seemed to doing well with the not knowing what to say tonight.

“Josef told me it’s possible, but I didn’t know whether I could do it until I tried.”

“Okay… another question..” I glanced at him to make sure he was all right with that. He nodded. “Did you actually make your ‘freshies’,” I couldn’t help but make inverted commas in the air as I said it, “…come… so to speak.. just by drinking their blood?” I blushed, embarrassed at having to ask.

I could see he was trying really hard not to smile this time, and it worked, kind of. He put his hand over his face, and rested his forehead in the palm of his hand while he sought to get himself under control. He looked up at me with a very serious look on his face, as I waited earnestly for his reply. As our eyes met though, he couldn’t keep a straight face, and a smile twitched at the corners of his mouth just before he cracked up laughing once more.

Watching him rolling on the floor, I couldn’t help but laugh myself. I’m not sure why it was funny, but it was. It was infectious. The more we looked at each other, the more we laughed, until we were both holding our sides and tears rolling down our faces. 

“Oh my God Beth…” he howled.

We clutched at one another, shaking with mirth, seemingly unable to stop for more than a few seconds before one of us set the other off. Gradually though, our titters finally subsided, and, holding onto Mick’s arms for support, I was able to look him in the eye with some semblance of self-restraint, and ask, “Did you though?”

That instantly set us both off again. After another five minutes of side-splitting, helpless laughter where Mick hit his head on the coffee table, and I laughed even more, at last we managed to pull ourselves together enough for Mick to attempt a response.

“Okay… I’m going to answer this. Without laughing, I promise,” he smiled. He cleared his throat, and I waited expectantly. “The answer is, yes.. I think so. Not that I ever asked them exactly…like ‘was it good for you?’… but judging by their reactions, and the word on the grapevine, yes, I think they pretty much ‘came’ as you put it, at least most of the time.”

“Wow.” I was impressed. “Can all vampires do that?”

“Well.. it depends….. The neck usually makes for a more intimate connection that the wrist, and it’s more likely to have the desired effect; but either will do it; and no, not all vamps are good at it.”

“Oh right….” I thought for a moment, “…so what about Josef? Can he do it too?”

“I’m thinking of Simone,” I added quickly, noting the look that flashed across Mick’s face when I mentioned Josef’s name, “she happened to mention that he won’t bite her on the neck. She was pretty upset about it.”

“Oh, he can do it all right. He’s had nearly four hundred years worth of practise, and plenty of freshies to help him out. Why do you think he’s surrounded be so many willing blood donors? No, I think the reason he sticks to her wrist is that he doesn’t want the emotional connection...yet. It can be pretty intense when you’re in love with the person you’re biting.”

“But he does love her, and he wants to turn her. I just don’t think he’s quite made up his mind yet, whether he can bring himself to do it .” I picked up a cushion, leaning it up against the couch, and slid down next to Mick as he held his arm out to me.

“So, she wants to be turned then?” he rubbed my arm thoughtfully as he said it.

“Oh yeah…definitely. As far as she’s concerned, it’s the only way they can really be together. Or at least have a future together……” I looked at Mick as I said it, but he was staring into the distance as though his thoughts were elsewhere.

“Mick….” I hesitated for a second, knowing I was pushing it, but seemingly unable to stop myself from asking, “..you remember when we were at Emma and Jackson’s house, and I asked you if you’d ever turned anyone?” He turned back to me then, a look that was almost panic on his face, and his fingers suddenly stilled on my arm.. “Well… you never answered the question..”

The question hung in the air between us. I think I was holding my breath, and Mick was so still it was like we were both frozen in time for an instant. His turned his head away and cast his eyes downward, as though considering whether to answer or not. For the longest time I thought he wasn’t going to answer at all, although his reaction had more or less answered the question for me; all I really needed to know now were the details.

Finally he seemed to come to a decision, and turned back to face me. I almost flinched at the look of raw pain on his face as he raised his eyes to mine. He started to speak a couple of times, but only a strangled sob came out, and I realised with horror that he was fighting back tears.

 

_________________________

To be continued/……………….


	18. A Turning Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: This chapter PG-13
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 18

Jacqui Kostan’s (aka Beth Turner) office, February 2014

Rachael is sleeping peacefully on the couch, her legs tucked up under her, her curly head nestled comfortably into a cushion. I walk over to her softly, careful not to wake her as I pick her abandoned coat from the floor where it has fallen, and drape it lightly over her sleeping form. She looks like an angel as she slumbers, her long dark lashes resting against the peachy creaminess of her flawless skin, the full, enviously naturally rosy lips slightly parted in the abandon of sleep.

I watch the pulse beating steadily just beneath the surface of her long slender neck, and I have to resist the sudden urge to lay my mouth over that smooth skin and sink my fangs in to taste the delicious nectar flowing underneath. I hesitate, momentarily frozen to the spot, unable to pull my gaze away from the steadily beating pulse, seeming almost to draw me to it. I catch the delicious scent of the blood from the wound, still fresh on her arm, and immediately my fangs descend, and my vision sharpens to the point where I can all but see the blood streaming through her veins. With some difficulty, I manage to take a few steps back, and quickly turn away, shaking, shocked by the intensity of the hunger demanding to be fed.

I havn’t felt the force of the craving this strongly since just after I was first turned. I’d begun to believe I had it under control, at least to a certain extent, but the longing I’m feeling now takes my breath away. I feel like I’ve been starved for weeks, although in reality it’s only been a few days since I last fed fresh. I’ve been careful to ensure I consumed at least one pre-bagged meal per day, but it’s not satisfying in the same way as feeding on warm blood from a living person, and until today I hadn’t noticed how much I’d missed it.

I can practically feel myself salivating with bloodlust, and it takes all my self control to force myself to walk unsteadily back to my desk and sit down. I bury my head in my hands and concentrate on trying to subdue the urge. I don’t want to hurt Rachael, and I’m beginning to get scared that if I can’t get myself under control soon, I’m going to do something I’ll regret. But the yearning is strong, and it’s not going to be suppressed so easily. I consider waking her up and asking if I can feed some more, but I don’t trust that I’ll be able to stop, so I remain where I am, tears of frustration starting to well up in my eyes from the effort it’s taking just to stay where I am. I’m literally aching to drink from her now. It feels like the entire office is infused with the intoxicating aroma of her blood, and I want to get up and go outside, anywhere to be away from the overwhelming pull of it. But I dare not move. If I do, I know I’ll be lost.

Almost without knowing I’m doing it, my hand fumbles for the chain at my throat, searching for something to hold onto. As my fingers close over the solid gold ring hanging from the chain, I grasp it like it’s the last lifebelt on a sinking ship, the metal digging into my skin as I clutch onto it in desperation. My eyes squeezed tightly shut, forehead creased with the effort, I try to remember what I’ve been taught. Focusing my entire concentration on the ring in my hand, I empty my head of all other thoughts, forcing myself to breathe slowly as an image gradually forms in my mind’s eye. My head sinks slowly to the desk, as my body curls over itself, both hands clasped tightly over the ring at their centre. 

“Someone I love…. someone I love…. someone I love…..” I whisper it over and over, willing myself to see someone, anyone, who can pull me back from the abyss. 

Sometimes it’s been my mother, other times my beloved dog, Tiger. Today though, I see the face of the man I loved with all my heart and soul; the man who turned me, and taught me how to live again when my life changed forever. The man who was now eternally lost to me.

All at once I can feel myself changing back, the terrible hunger subsides at last, as my fangs retract and my eyes fade back to their human form. A tear escapes from the corner of my eye then, spilling down my cheek to drip onto the desk below, and only then do I realise I’ve been crying. I stay where I am, catching my breath, so very grateful that I’ve been lucky enough to have had an excellent teacher, one who’d cared enough, had understood enough, to teach me the discipline necessary to control the vampire within me. I’d been one of the lucky ones.

Mick St. John had not been so fortunate; he’d had to depend on Coraline when he’d first been turned. A half-crazy, uncaring bitch, who’d turned him without his permission, giving no consideration to how he would feel, or whether he could cope with the changes that his new found status would bring. In his eyes, he’d become a monster, and there wasn’t a damned thing he could do about it. 

It all made so much sense to me now, with the benefit of hindsight. I understood why Mick had hated what he was, and his reluctance to inflict that burden on me. I hadn’t understood then, not really, no matter how much I liked to think that I did. It wasn’t something you could know until you’d experienced it for yourself. I hadn’t thought so at the time, but, yes, I was one of the lucky ones…..

**********

When I’d asked Mick if he’d ever turned anyone, I had no idea it would provoke the reaction it did. I felt dreadful watching him trying to reign in his emotions, taking deep breaths as he’d tried to calm down enough to talk to me.

“Oh God Beth…..” he put his head in his hand, “I don’t know if I can do this.”

“Then don’t. I don’t need to know.” I took his hand and held it tightly, trying to tell him without words that it was okay; I’d be here for him whether he chose to tell me or not.

“I need a drink,” he sighed, giving my hand a squeeze before letting go and standing up to retrieve his jeans from where I’d thrown them earlier that evening. Pulling them on, he strolled over to the kitchen, pushing aside the glasses on the shelf to get to the hidden refrigerator behind. Pouring himself a glass of A-pos, he added a generous measure of Scotch and gulped it down in two swallows.

“Do you want anything?” he asked, pouring himself a fresh glass of whiskey as I shook my head.

Feeling a bit naked now that Mick was dressed, I wrapped the blanket around myself and got to my feet to fetch my shirt and panties from the crumpled pile of clothes on the floor.

He plonked himself down on the couch, leaning back and closing his eyes as he took another liberal swallow of his drink. Not knowing quite what to do with myself, I sat down on the couch opposite, wrapping the blanket over my legs to keep me warm, and waited.

Finally he opened his eyes and looked at me. He seemed calmer now, and I said nothing, allowing him to collect his thoughts. Whatever had happened with his first turning, and I was in no doubt now that he had turned someone, or at least tried to, it obviously hadn’t gone well. If he chose not to tell me, I could deal with that. At least that’s what I tried to tell myself. Who was I kidding? It would kill me to be left wondering.

Almost as though he read my thoughts, he gave a little smile, “It’s okay Beth, I am going to tell you.”

I started slightly, wondering, not for the first time, whether he actually could read my mind. I shrugged; feigning nonchalance.

“Okay…” he leaned forward, “you remember I told you how Coraline turned me on our wedding night?” I nodded. “Well, the next day, I awoke with the bloodlust. It’s like that when you’re first turned. The need for fresh blood is almost overwhelming those first few days. You’re just so hungry, and you don’t even know exactly what you’re hungry for. I remember going to the kitchen and tearing myself off a chunk of bread, but it tasted like cardboard in my mouth, and I was violently sick afterwards. I practically worked my way through the entire fridge, bolting down anything I could find, then throwing it up again just as quickly. By the time Coraline arrived back with my first fresh meal in tow, the kitchen looked like a bomb had hit it.”

He paused, and I gestured for him to continue.

“I was so confused. I tried to run away. I remember getting as far as the garage, and hunkering down next to my car, wanting to die rather than feel the way I was feeling right then. She found me easily. I begged her to put me out of my misery, anything to put an end to the burning hunger I just didn’t seem able to satisfy. I didn’t even really know what she’d done to me. I had an inkling, but I couldn’t seem to think straight. I just wanted it to stop. I remember suddenly seeing a woman in front of me, Coraline urging me towards her neck, and even though the smell coming off of her was wonderful, I had absolutely no idea what she expected me to do. When realisation finally dawned, I was horrified. I pleaded with Coraline to make it stop, even though I knew in my heart of hearts that there was no going back.”

He broke off for a moment, running his hands through his hair, slightly desperately, as though reliving the moment.

“I can’t even imagine what that must have been like,” I said sympathetically, wondering what all this had to do with the original question.

“Then it was like…. well instinct just kind of took over. One minute I was staring at her neck, fascinated by the way her pulse point was pounding, the next I’d sunk my fangs in and was drinking her blood like I couldn’t get enough of it. It was so ….. wonderful!” He gestured with his hands to try to get across the meaning. “It sated my craving like nothing else could. The taste was divine. It was like drinking liquid joy. I’d never felt such pleasure in my life.” He looked up at me, the anguish in his eyes plain to see. “I literally drained her dry...”

“Mick… it wasn’t your fault…” I started to say.

“You’re wrong Beth…..” He looked at me with an empty expression in his eyes. “It was my fault. I did that to her. Coraline may have brought her to me, but I was the one who killed her.”

“Mick …. no…” But he cut me off again before I could continue.

“There’s more ….”

I bit my tongue, knowing he had to tell this in his own time. “Okay, I’m listening.”

Mick stood up and slowly walked over to the window, leaning against the glass with his back to me. “In those first few days, Coraline used to bring me girls…women… to drink from, on a daily basis. Although after the first experience I always made sure I stopped before I took too much. Coraline explained how to listen out for the slowing of the heart rate, the telltale sign that blood loss is becoming too great, and gradually I learned how to take just enough, but not too much. I began to get a feel for how long I could drink from a person before the heart even started to slow. Coraline would bring the women to our home blindfolded, then they’d be returned to where she’d found them, minus a pint or so of blood, but otherwise unharmed.”

He paused, turning to face me, and breathed a heavy sigh before continuing. “Things became more bearable as the days went on. I’d even started to think there might be a future to this new life of mine. Coraline had mentioned the freshies, and promised to look into getting us some willing full time donors. Then one day… she brought me another….” he broke off, his voice cracking with emotion as he dragged his hand over his face and turned back to face the window. After a few moments he seemed to collect himself and looked to me once more.

“She brought me another woman, blindfolded as usual, and I began to feed from her. I should have known something was different… her blood wasn’t the same as the others…. I couldn’t explain to you quite how, and at the time I was certainly no expert, but it was just better somehow… sweeter, more vibrant. Anyway….. I thought I was being careful… I only drank as much from her as I’d taken from the others..” he paused again, looking down at the floor, before flicking his eyes up to meet mine. “But all of a sudden I was aware that her heartbeat had slowed past the point of no return. I don’t know how I missed it. I stopped as soon as I realised, but I knew it was too late. She was limp in my arms, barely breathing…. I panicked… I don’t know why, but I pulled off the blindfold. It was the first time I really saw her… up until then she’d just been food. I really looked at her for the first time; not just her face, but the whole of her.”

He stopped, and I saw tears shining in his eyes as he looked at me. “Beth….” 

As our eyes met, I had a horrible feeling I knew what was about to come next. For his sake I really hoped I was wrong.

“Beth…. she was a child…” His voice broke as he said it, his whole face crumpling. I couldn’t help it, my hand flew to my mouth in horror, not for the child, but for what I knew it must have done to Mick.

He struggled to continue. “…she couldn’t have been more than thirteen or fourteen… I had no idea…”

Tears were rolling down his face now, as he fought to carry on. “I just wanted to make it better…. I wasn’t thinking what I was doing….”

“You turned her.” I whispered.

He nodded, unable to speak, the look on his face breaking my heart into a million pieces as I suddenly understood what had made Mick into the man he was today.

I was frozen, my hand still raised to my mouth as I tried to assimilate this new information. My mind was reeling, all I could think of was how awful it must have been for Mick. How did he live with himself after something like that?

I could only stare at him. What words of comfort could you offer someone to make something like that better? I had no idea.

I sat there, too stunned to speak. All I wanted to do was put my arms around him and tell him it would be okay, take his pain away and tell him it wasn’t his fault, but I seemed rooted to the spot, unable to move.

“Beth….” his voice sounded emotionless as he said it.

I looked up at the sound of his voice.

“Just go…” The words came out cold and broken as he stood up and headed towards the stairs, not looking back.

“Mick NO!” I practically fell over my feet in my hurry to stand up, running to catch up with him and stepping into his path as he started to climb the stairs. He tried to sidestep me, but I blocked him.

“I love you Mick…. and nothing you could have told me will ever change that.” I said, grabbing his arms and making him look at me. “This was not your fault, although I know you blame yourself. Coraline brought you that girl; there’s no way you could have known. You tried to save her Mick. You did the right thing.”

His eyes were brimming with pain as he looked at me. “Coraline had to kill her Beth. She was totally wild. I didn’t know what I was doing or how to control her; she’d practically drained me dry by the time Coraline arrived on the scene.”

“It was not your fault.” I repeated. “You never asked to be turned. You are not responsible for what happened.”

He nodded, but I wasn’t sure whether it was in agreement or resignation, as he shakily lowered himself down onto the bottom step and put his head in his hands, giving himself up to the tears at last. I sat down beside him, tentatively putting an arm around his shoulders, and patted him awkwardly. After a couple of moments he turned into me, clutching at me blindly as he sank into my embrace, and I held onto him tightly, cradling his head in my arms as he wept.

After a minute or so, he recovered enough to sit up, turning to me with an unhappy look on his face, but his voice was steady as he held my gaze, “I was a monster Beth. Coraline turned me into a monster…”

“You’re not a monster now.” I said firmly.

“But I was….I did terrible things when I was first turned…” there was a look of desperation on his face as he looked at me, “I want to be with you forever Beth…. but how could I do that to you? How could I do that?……” his voice trailed off as he shook his head despairingly.

I didn’t know how to answer. All I could do was hug him tightly and be glad that at least we had the here and now. And those words he’d said…. ‘I want to be with you forever’….…….they repeated over and over in my head. Had he really meant that? I hoped so. Tears pricked my eyes as we held each other, but I couldn’t help but smile.

 

_________________________

To be continued/……………….


	19. An unexpected development

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Not my property, unfortunately. All rights belong to.... whomever they belong!
> 
> Rating: This chapter PG-13/R
> 
>  
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 19

*Jacqui Kostan’s office, February 2014*

I come to, finding myself slumped over my desk with my head resting on my arms. The sound of the distant ringing of my cell phone is insistent in the background, and groggily I sit up and stretch, wondering where I left my purse. Following the sound, I dive under the desk and retrieve my bag, rummaging around for the elusive phone and thinking for the hundredth time that my purse is long overdue for a spring cleanout. Finally locating it, I see Helena’s ID blinking on the screen, and press my finger to the screen to answer it before she gives up and decides to ring off.

“Hey.” I say, keeping my voice down, mindful that Rachael is still fast asleep.

“Jacqui…. I’m glad I caught you. I was worried you wouldn’t get my message. How are you sweetheart?” The concern in her voice is apparent.

“I’m okay.” I say automatically. “You know… holding up. Sorry I’ve been out of the loop…..” my voice trails off.

“Jacqui hon ….., I wasn’t having a pop. I just wanted to make sure you were okay…” she hesitates slightly, “… and that you got my message.”

The message… I’d almost forgotten about it. “Yeah, I got your e-mail, but you didn’t say what it was about. Is everything okay?” 

“Yes.. nothing to worry about….” She sounds a bit nervous. “I hope you don’t mind… I thought it might do you good to get back into work… something to keep your mind off things. I fielded some calls for you while you were away…..” 

I chuckle softly at Helena’s obvious discomfort, touched, though, that she’d helped out. “Just spit it out Helena… how many clients have you booked?”

“Oh, just the one.” She quickly clarifies. “I was able to put most of them off until next week. He was very insistent though, and to be honest… I felt a bit sorry for him…” her voice peters out hopefully. “He’s coming at twelve noon tomorrow. That’s not too early is it? I wasn’t sure what hours you worked.”

I hasten to reassure her, not wanting her to think she’s done something wrong, when she was obviously just trying to be helpful. “That’s absolutely fine Helena. I’m really grateful for your help, and to be honest it’s just what I need now. What’s his name?” I pull over my desk diary and start leafing through the pages, searching around for a pen.

“Hang on a minute…” I hear a thump and some rustling. “Okay.. here we go… Mr O’Connor. His fourteen year old daughter went missing two days ago. He thinks she may have skipped town with her boyfriend. He’s twenty-one, and a bit of a n’er-do-well from all accounts. He was frantic. I told him you’d be able to help. I hope I did the right thing…”

Another missing child… how come most of my cases these days seemed to involve kids scaring their parents to death by running off without a word? At least it was something I was experienced at. “No problem Helena. I’ll certainly give it my best shot.” I scribble down his name and snap the diary shut. “Was that it?” I have the weirdest feeling that she’s not telling me everything. “I just got the impression from your message that it was something….else….” I shake my head, not even sure myself what I mean, “ I don’t know....”

“No.” She says it a bit too quickly and a bit too brightly. “That was it.”

“Okay…” I mutter, although my spidey sense is tingling and I’m wondering what she’s not telling me. 

“How’s Evie?” she asks. I know she’s changing the subject, but I decide to let it go for now.

“She’s fine.” I smile, thinking fondly of my beautiful little blond haired girl. “Mrs Anderson’s taking care of her at the moment. In fact… speaking of which..” I glance at my wristwatch, realising I must have slept longer than I’d thought, “I need to get going or I’m going to be late picking her up. Tell you what……. would you like to come by tomorrow evening for a visit? I’m sure she’ll be just dying to sing her Auntie Helena the new song she learned at nursery. I could cook you dinner if you’d like.”

“I’d love to.” 

“Great! Is six thirty okay?”

“Fine. I’ll see you then.” She rings off and I throw the phone back into my bag, pushing away from the desk and making my way over to Rachael, who’s still not stirred from her prone position on the couch.

I rub her shoulder gently. “Rache….”

“Mmmmm……” comes the mumbled response.

“Rache.. time to wake up now.” I shake her a bit harder and prod her arm gently.

Her eyes open sleepily and she yawns, stretching her arms over her head. “How long have I been asleep?” she mutters.

“Not long. A couple of hours maybe? I fell asleep too, otherwise I’d have woken you up.”

“Oh God!” She’s up off the couch like a rabbit out of a trap, scattering cushions, bag and coat onto the floor in her haste. “I’m late!” 

I can only stand back in amusement as she draws me into a rapid hug, planting a quick kiss on my cheek before whirling around to retrieve her belongings from the floor.

“Take care of yourself Jacqui.” She fixes me with a motherly-looking stare as she backs away towards the door.

“Yes ‘Mom’.” I promise, grinning at her.

“I’ll be by tomorrow to check up on you…” she threatens from halfway out the door, and I smile, knowing she’ll follow through, even though she’s half joking.

As the door bangs shut, a piece of paper flutters from the table, swaying gently in the air, drifting from side to side as it floats gently to the floor. As it finally comes to settle, the office seems suddenly very, very quiet.

I wander back over to my desk, turning the computer off and straightening up the files. My hand hovers over a picture frame lying facedown on the desk, and for a moment I can’t seem to breathe as I hesitate to pick it up. Slowly reaching out to turn it over, I feel a lump form in my throat. The three people in the photograph look almost like strangers to me. Taken barely weeks ago, it depicts a happy family, all smiling broadly into the camera, the man holding the little girl in his arms as she grins adoringly up at him, the woman standing slightly behind, her arms encircling the both of them. So happy… yet it shatters my heart into pieces to look at them.

Tears are stinging my eyes as I gently replace the photograph next to the one of Mick St. John. His startling hazel blue eyes stare out of the picture, seeming to look straight at me, just exactly the same shade as those belonging to the little girl in the fame next to it.

 

*************************

*Mick’s apartment, 2008*

For the second time in the space of a week, I awoke alone in Mick’s bed. This time, however, rather than raised voices, came the mouth watering smell of sizzling bacon, and the distant sounds of someone rattling around in the kitchen below. Stretching luxuriously, a satisfied smile spreading across my face, I threw back the covers and swung my legs over the side of the bed, quickly shrugging on Mick’s abandoned shirt as I hurried downstairs. Glancing at my wristwatch, I noticed it was barely just gone 6:00am, and had to wonder if Mick thought I usually got up this early. A lover of my sleep, normally, I’d be lying in for at least another hour.

Reaching the halfway point down the stairs, I stopped in amazement as I caught sight of a shirtless Mick, wearing nothing but a pair of faded blue jeans, dancing his way around the kitchen to the strains of Stayin’ Alive, hips gyrating, arms waving, really going for it. I tried to stifle the laugh that rose to my lips, but I must have snorted or something, because he suddenly turned around, noticed me watching him, and, stopping abruptly, gave me a bashful grin.

“Good morning,” I smiled broadly, continuing my journey down the stairs, “I take it that’s all for me?” I took in the eggs frying in a pan on the stove, mushrooms, bacon and tomatoes sizzling under the grill, and the toast just popping up from the toaster.

“Well you bought it… I assumed you ate it,” he grinned back, grabbing the toast and beginning to spread it liberally with butter.

“Hey, go easy on the butter there,” I laughed, “have to watch my waistline!”

“There is nothing wrong with your waistline,” he shot back, moving over to encircle my waist and plant a kiss on my unsuspecting mouth.

Only too well aware of the fact that I hadn’t cleaned my teeth yet, I kept my lips clamped shut and tried not to breathe on him.

“I’m going to clean my teeth,” I said, wiggling out of his grasp, and grabbed my purse, thankful that I’d thought to put a toothbrush in there for emergencies.

“Tea or coffee?” he asked, emptying the eggs out onto a plate and turning off the gas.

“Tea please.” I didn’t have to tell him how I liked it, he’d made tea enough times for me in the past to know I took it black with no sugar.

Dashing back upstairs, I headed for the bathroom, horrified to see that my mascara was smudged all under my eyes, and my hair was standing up practically vertically at the front. Dragging a brush through my hair, and trying to tame it down with water, I washed my face and cleaned my teeth before heading back downstairs.

Mick had laid out my breakfast on the island, and was busy rooting around in the recessed refrigerator, as I walked up behind him and put my arms about his waist. “Now you can kiss me,” I murmured into his bare back, peppering small kisses over his skin, loving the way he tensed and shivered in response.

Placing the vial of blood in his hand on the worktop, he turned around and gathered me into his arms, a huge smile on his face as his eyes travelled over me appraisingly. “I quite liked the punk rock panda look,” he said mischievously.

“You don’t look so hot yourself,” I retorted, hitting at him playfully, disgusted that he looked liked he’d just stepped out of the cover of Red Hot Hunks.

He just grinned back at me with a very self assured look on his face. “And to think I spent a whole hour doing myself up for you…”

I cut off anything more he might have been about to say as I reached up and grabbed the back of his neck, pulling his mouth down to mine and kissing him a very, long, slow, and passionate good morning. I ran my tongue over the edge of his lips, my stomach doing a quick summersault as he parted his lips and our tongues began a tangled dance in one another’s mouths. My hands wandered downwards to cup his ass, and his came up inside my shirt, running teasingly up my sides and over my ribs.

“Don’t you have to work today?” Mick murmured into my neck, nuzzling me, and dropping kisses into the hollow of my throat.

“Unfortunately..” I sighed, brushing one more kiss lightly over Mick’s lips before reluctantly drawing back slightly, “and I need to drive home to get a change of clothing first.”

“Get eating then,” he said, indicating the stool at the breakfast bar, “I didn’t cook all this for the fun of it.”

“Looked like you were having plenty of fun to me,” I snickered, and I could have sworn he blushed as he pointedly ignored my comment.

As I settled down to eat, Mick retrieved the vial of blood and took a syringe out of the cupboard, taking both and heading to the living room, where he sat down and proceeded to fill the syringe. Curious, I stopped with my fork midway to my mouth, fascinated to see what Mick was doing. He deftly injected the blood straight into his arm, whereupon he sank back against the back of the couch, looking for all the world like he’d just taken a shot of heroin - there was no other way to describe it - and I heard him hiss as his fangs appeared momentarily, only to retract again mere moments later. He stayed like that, eyes closed, leaning back against the cushions, for about half a minute, then he opened his eyes, looking directly at me as I sat transfixed with the morsel of food still halfway to my mouth.

“Hit the spot?” I asked, unsure of what else to say at a moment like that, but at the same time insanely happy that he’d felt able to do it in front of me.

He gave me a matter of fact look. “It’s quite a rush when you take blood that way, but it’s the quickest and most efficient way to get it into your system. It‘s usually how I start the day.”

“Okay….” I brought the fork to my mouth and ate the piece of bacon that had been suspended in midair for the duration.

“But isn’t this normally your bedtime?” I queried, gesturing with a piece of mushroom speared to the end of my fork. “I mean, aren’t you about to hit the freezer?”

“Usually, yes, but not always.” He levered himself up off the couch and strolled over to the sink, rinsing out the syringe before storing it away in the concealed cupboard. “Today I have a client coming at 9:00am. I’ll catch up on a little freezer time later.”

“Speaking of work…I’d better get a move on if I don’t want to be late. I still need to get home and change.” I cleared the last few morsels from my plate and slid off the stool to rinse my plate before stacking it in the dishwasher.

“Delicious!” I said, moving to give him a hug. “Thank you.”

“My pleasure,” he smiled. “But you get on, I can clean up here.”

Thanking him again with a quick kiss, I wandered off to unearth the previous day’s creased clothes from various corners of the lounge where they been abandoned, and went back upstairs to get dressed, while Mick set about clearing up the kitchen. When I came back down, he’d finished tidying up and was sitting on the couch, chewing nervously at a nail, clearly deep in thought.

“What’s up?” I asked, walking up behind him and leaning down to slide my arms over his chest, dropping a kiss on his cheek in the process.

He shook his head, “It’s nothing… just a thought I had. Probably not a good idea anyway..”

“What’s not a good idea?” He should have known better than to tell me if he didn’t want me asking.

“Never mind,” he said with finality, getting up and walking with me to the door. “Let me know how you get on with Ben. In the meantime, I’ve got some things I need to take care of this end… contact the cleaners, Logan and Guillermo… discuss a plan.” He looked me straight in the eye as he said the next words. “Come by after work… we’ll be needing your input.”

I was so ridiculously happy to hear those words come out his mouth. I’m not sure if he knew how much it meant to me that he wasn’t shutting me out of his vampire business, but it didn’t matter. He wasn’t, and even with the threat of exposure hanging over Mick’s head, I couldn’t have been happier in that moment. The smile on my face reached from ear to ear as I hoisted my purse on my shoulder and made ready to leave.

“Bye.” I said, reaching up to drop a quick peck on the corner of his mouth. I was already halfway out the door as I felt his hand grab me by the waist and spin me around, whereupon he drew my body hard against his and proceeded to crush his lips to mine in a spine-tingling, stomach flipping, bone melting, belter of a kiss that had me clinging limply to him and trying to catch my breath when he finally lifted his mouth from mine.

“Goodbye.” he grinned.

I practically floated to the elevator. I wasn‘t looking forward to broaching the subject of the list with Ben, but for now nothing could wipe that silly grin from my face.

****************

After a quick shower and change of clothes, I jumped in my car and headed in to work. No sooner had I walked through the door though, than Ben came running over. “Beth, I’m glad you’re here… we have a homicide I need you to cover.” Though that shouldn’t have pleased me, I was so overjoyed to finally have a real case to get my teeth into that I immediately brightened at this news.

“No problem. What do you need me to do?” I was already grabbing a pen from my purse and getting ready to jot down the details.

“Okay…. well we have a twenty-four year old male found decapitated at the bottom of an embankment. An early morning dog walker discovered the body after her dog found the severed head. No witnesses as yet, but I’d like you to do a reccie of the scene and take a detailed interview from the woman who discovered the body… see if she remembers anything more. We’ve no idea of motive, so I’ll need you to do some background research on the guy, see if you can come up with anything.” He looked at his watch with the air of someone who should have been somewhere half an hour ago.. “I’m in court again today otherwise I’d come with you. Will you be alright on your own?”

“You can count on me.” I affirmed.

He hurriedly fetched a file from his office and slapped it into my waiting hand. “The details are all in there. Call me if you need anything.” And with that, he seized his briefcase and dashed out of the door, breaking into a run as he hastened to get to his court appointment on time.

As the door swung shut behind him I had a moment to regret that I’d not had a chance to so much as mention the names he’d had me looking into. That would have to wait. For now I had to get moving. It seemed wrong to be so excited about someone’s untimely death, but I found myself itching to get going on the investigation. I grabbed a coffee from the vending machine, and took a few moments to read through the file Ben had given me, familiarising myself with the details before setting out. I was just tapping in a number on the phone to arrange an interview with the dog walker, a Mrs Patricia Millen, when my cell phone rang.

Locating my phone with unusual speed, thanks to my spring clean the other day, which had included my over-stuffed purse, I looked at the caller ID and was surprised to see Josef’s name displayed.

Frowning slightly in concern, worried that he would call me at this early hour, or at all for that matter, I stared at the screen for a moment. Maybe he just wanted to know if I’d made a decision on the re-location? As it rang again I answered in what I hoped was a professional sounding voice.

“Beth Turner.”

“Beth…. it’s Josef. There’s been a development…… Can you come to my office?” He sounded very unlike his usual chipper, mildly sarcastic self, worry very evident in the tone of his voice.

The decapitated body was instantly pushed back into second place on my priority list. “Of course. I’ll be right over… about twenty minutes.”

“Thanks..” I heard him mutter, and the line went dead.

I sat for a second, wondering what could have transpired to cause Josef to sound so uncharacteristically anxious all of a sudden. Then, kicking myself into gear, and focusing on the task at hand, I finished my cup of coffee, grabbed my purse, and headed out.

_____________

To be continued…..


	20. Some surprising results

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Rating: This chapter PG-13
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 20

Josef was sitting with his back to me facing the window when I walked into his office, jiggling his chair backwards in an agitated rhythm, as he tapped a pen repeatedly against the armrest. My heels clicked over the slate tiles with a loud clatter, drawing his attention to me, and he swung around to face me, a troubled look on his face as he frowned in thought.

“Hi Beth,” he said, a mocking smile beginning to play at the corners of his mouth as he regarded me, “I was thinking of setting up a bat signal…. save us both a bit of money on phonecalls…”

“Hmmm……” I smiled evilly, “well, if we were both complete geeks” I said, emphasising the ‘both’, “that would be a great idea…. as it is….” I sighed, letting my voice trail off meaningfully.

He smiled a grudging smile that said I’d got him with that one, and satisfaction welled as I sauntered up to his desk hiding a smirk. “So.. what’s up?” I asked, my face sobering as I took the seat he indicated with a gesture of his hand.

In answer, he took hold of his laptop and swivelled it to face me. Confused, I squinted at the screen, wondering why he was showing me his Facebook page.

“Is there any way that someone could have found out about you discovering that list?” he shot at me, fixing me with an intent look as he continued to bounce agitatedly in his chair.

I frowned, puzzled by the turn of events. “I don’t think so…..” 

“Then how come I suddenly get a threatening message from someone who assumes I’ve seen it and know what they’re talking about?” he glared at me.

I was thrown somewhat by his accusatory stance. “Okay…. you’re going to have to explain….”

“The message! From ‘Hemera’. Read the message!” He barked.

I leaned closer to the screen, reading the message displayed in the small pop up window.

“I KNOW YOUR SECRET. HOW MUCH IS IT WORTH? YOU HAVE 48 HOURS TO DECIDE OR MORE HEADS WILL ROLL.”

“Oh my God….” The timing certainly seemed too much of a coincidence to indicate any other reason, and I racked my brains to think how someone could have observed me taking the photos. “They’re blackmailing you?” 

He looked disgusted. “And on Facebook of all places! What is the world coming to when people can’t even be bothered to assemble a note cut from random newspaper clippings?”

“What do they mean… more heads will roll?” I looked at Josef uncertainly, and as soon as I’d said the words out loud, things seemed to start clicking into place. 

“Josef…..” I asked, hoping I was going to be wrong about this, “did you approach your contact already? The re-location guy?”

“I called in to see him last night after I left Mick’s. I provisionally arranged for new identities for all four of us… myself, Simone, you, and Mick.” He dragged a hand through his hair anxiously. “Why?” 

A horrible thought was starting to form in my mind. “This guy… what’s his name and how old is he?”

Josef leaned back in his chair. “Ah Beth… you should know I can’t give details like that out.. even to my best friends.. discretion is the name of the game where these matters are concerned.”

“Okay… I’ll make it easier for you,” I reached down for the file Ben had given me earlier, leafing through it until I came to the photograph taken by the crime scene photographer this morning. I tried not to look too closely at the severed head as I pulled out the sheet of paper and placed it in front of Josef. “Does he look anything like this?”

Josef sat up straight in his chair as he examined the picture, inhaling sharply before he pushed it back across the desk to me. “Shit.” he uttered under his breath.

“He was found early this morning. The police have no motive or suspects as yet, but they’re investigating.” I looked pointedly at Josef, and he met my eyes unflinchingly. “Is there anything I should know?”

“Well, he’s not a vampire if that’s what you’re asking,” he leaned his head in his hand, staring intently at the desk as though looking for the answer to appear out of the wooden surface, “he’s a friend of Rider’s… you remember? The guy who helped track down that missing girl a few months back. He’d not long graduated from college with a masters in mechanical engineering.” He glanced up at me. “Shit….” he reiterated.

“So the re-location thing was just a sideline?” I queried.

“He did it to earn his way through college I think. It’s a lucrative business for those that have the know how.”

“Speaking of Rider…” I remembered the rather awkward computer expert well, “maybe you could ask him to run a check on this ‘Hemera’ person, see if he can turn anything up on the ip address from the e-mail they used to sign on. It’s probably just some internet café somewhere, but it’s worth checking out even so.”

Josef glanced up at me, a look on his face that said he was rather surprised I hadn’t remembered. “He’s still on sabbatical in South America.” He sighed, “Best place for him at the moment, what with all this going on.”

“There’s always Logan..” I suggested, “….if you can manage to lure him out of his basement.”

He smirked then, raising his eyebrows suggestively. “Now really Beth… you’re asking if the master of temptation that is I ”, he used both hands to point at himself, “knows how to lure a person?” Grinning evilly, his eyes settled on mine and held, the blatantly wicked look in them leaving the double-meaning behind his comment in no doubt whatsoever.

I smiled my most charming smile back at him, my eyes never breaking contact with his. “I’m quite sure you could tempt birds out of the trees Josef…..” I let the smile fall from my face as I took out a pen and notebook, swiftly changing the subject, “…so, can you think of any reason anyone would want to kill this guy apart from that he was about to arrange new identities for the four of us?”

His face sobered up, eyes flicking to the photo, still lying on the desk, then away. “None whatsoever,” he stated. “Whoever is behind this is trying to cut off our escape route.”

Thoughtfully, I tapped the pen on my notepad, “There’s a good chance that whoever is behind this thought that….” I flicked through the papers in the folder to find the name on the case file notes, “…Brendon Morrison… was a vampire too. Why else would they have cut his head off?”

“Perhaps to demonstrate that they know how to kill those of us who are.” Josef suggested, leaning back in his chair and frowning.

“So to sum up..” I flicked my gaze to Josef once more, “from the fact that Ben’s had me looking into the names, we can assume the list didn’t originate from the D.A.’s office. It could have come from Emma Moinaghan, or maybe someone who got hold of it via Emma somehow. Or it could be someone else entirely?” I looked at him for confirmation.

“I’ve been thinking about that…” his brows knitted together thoughtfully, “if the list came direct from Emma, why would her and Jackson’s names have been struck out? Someone’s been updating it, and since, to all intents and purposes, everyone outside the vampire community thinks Emma and Jackson skipped the country to avoid her being convicted, it has to be someone with inside knowledge of the vampire community.”

“Either that, or someone who’s been observing the proceedings very closely.” I sighed. My head was starting to hurt, and I still had appointments to make and interviews to carry out. “Get Logan on the case with that Facebook profile, and in the meantime I suggest making no response to the threat. If it’s money they’re after, they’re not going to do anything to jeopardise their bargaining power.”

Josef gave me an uneasy look. “Not to me maybe... they could expose someone else to get their point across though.”

I snorted, smiling despite the gravity of the situation. “Who’s going to believe vampires actually exist anyway? There’s no such thing as vampires, remember?”

He rolled his eyes sarcastically. “Funny…. that’s not what the torch-bearing mob were saying back in sixteen ninety-eight, if I recall…”

I regarded Josef for a moment, trying to imagine what it must have been like to have lived through four centuries. Most of the time, watching him swan around in his Armani suits, surrounded by modern technology, it was easy to forget how old he actually was.

“We need to find out if anyone else received the same threat.” I said. “How many people on that list could you contact to find out?”

“Enough,” he said curtly. An impish smile spread across his face then, as he turned to his laptop and tapped a few keys. “I’ll just Facebook them now shall I?”

I started to lean forward to tell him that wouldn’t be advisable, then changed my mind, instead smiling at Josef’s dry sense of humour as I gathered up the papers and photo and tucked them back into the folder.

“Anyway, I’d better get going.“ I stood up to go. “I have a lot of people to interview today,” I sighed inwardly, not relishing the thought of having to work on a case that was going to cause a real conflict of interest for me. “We can compare notes later at Mick’s. I think he was intending having a meeting to discuss a plan of action. I take it you’re going?”

“I’ll be there.” Josef just looked at me for a moment, his expression unreadable, then he stood up and walked with me to the door. “Take care Beth,” he said, turning to face me as I paused outside the door.

“I will.” I promised. “You too.”

With that I turned and walked away, my heels making a hollow sound as they echoed over the tile floor.

**************

The rest of the day was spent in a flurry of activity. I did a recce of the crime scene, but turned up nothing that hadn’t already been documented by those first on the scene. My interview with Mrs Millen wasn’t much better. All she’d been able to confirm was that she’d left for her morning dogwalk at five-thirty am as usual, and approximately fifteen minutes into the walk, her dog, Taz - a German Shepherd, had failed to respond to her whistle. Upon investigation, she’d discovered what was keeping the dog’s attention, and had immediately grabbed her cell phone and called for the police.

Terrified that the killer might still have been around, she’d grabbed her dog and run back the way she’d come without taking much notice of what was going on around her. I couldn’t blame her really, it wasn’t the kind of situation you’d want to hang around in, but it didn’t help my investigation any. I left with the promise that she’d contact me if she recalled anything more about the incident.

The murdered boy’s parents were understandably too distraught to undergo interview, so I decided to check out the University angle and see what that turned up. Having checked into his background, I discovered that Brendon Morrison had attended Keyes college for five years whilst studying for his degree, and subsequently, his masters, in mechanical engineering. I was able to find out several names of friends from his course lecturers, and of the five names that came up, luckily three of them still lived in the vicinity.

All were shocked and horrified to discover what had happened, and not one of them could think of a single reason anyone would want to murder their friend. They all pretended not to know that Brendon had ever been involved with forging identity papers, but I could tell from their reactions that this wasn’t news to most of them. My gentle probing, however, as to the nature of his clientele, was met with blank, although honest, stares, and I didn’t get the impression that any of them knew he’d dealt with anything other than normal human beings.

By six o’clock that afternoon, I finally arrived back at the office. I’d spent the best part of the day driving all over the city on what seemed like a completely pointless exercise. There appeared to be absolutely no motive for the murder of Brendon Morrison, save, of course, for the glaringly obvious reason I already suspected, but was unwilling, and unable, to divulge.

It was just gone six thirty when Ben arrived back from his day in court, and I was sitting at my computer with a cup of fast-cooling black coffee in my hand, frowning as I put the finishing touches to my summary of the day’s inquiries. Quickly printing the pages out and slipping them into the casefile, I made my way towards Ben’s office and knocked on the door.

“Come in,” he called out through the partially open doorway, and I stepped inside, handing him the casefile and briefing him on my progress to date.

“Good work,” he told me, smiling, and obviously pleased with what I’d done so far, and I couldn’t help but feel guilty, knowing there was information I was holding back.

“How was your day in court?” I asked.

“Long and boring,” he smiled resignedly, “and lucky me if I don’t get to do it all again tomorrow.” He sighed, handing the casefile back to me, “You might as well hold on to this. Looks like you’ll be on your own again tomorrow I’m afraid. At least I don’t have to be at court until ten, so there’ll be time to go over the coroner’s report before I leave .We should hopefully find out more about the weapon used, which might give you something more to go on.”

“Great.” I smiled a rather forced smile, wondering if now would be a good time to probe further about the names he’d had me looking into before this had come up.

“So… um… I have an hour or so before I need to leave… I was going to carry on with those names you asked me to check out...” I hesitated, desperately trying to think of a reason for asking about them. “..I was thinking… maybe if I knew what you were looking for exactly.. that it might help me look in the right areas.” I smiled expectantly.

He waved away my concern with a gesture of his hand. “Don’t worry about it Beth. That can go on the back burner for now; we’ve got more important things to worry about.” He reached for another file, lying open on his desk, and handed it over to me. “Another killing… drug related this time by the looks of it…I was just reading through it when you knocked. Perhaps you could take a look tonight? Get a head start, and we can discuss it in the morning.” He smiled at me before reaching for his briefcase and effectively dismissing me. “I need to read over some witness statements.” he said flipping the catches and taking out a wad of papers, “… sorry to leave you on your own again. Shouldn’t be for too much longer though.”

“No problem.” I said through somewhat-gritted teeth. Hugging the two casefiles to my chest, I smiled in what I hoped was an enthusiastic looking way, before turning on my heel and making my way back to my desk.

***************

An hour and a half, and the beginnings of a thumping headache, later, I finally finished the last page of the report. Snapping the file shut, I quickly filed it away in the cabinet and rubbed my tired eyes, yawning as I retrieved my bag and shrugged on my jacket. Ben was still in his office as I passed by on the way out, so I knocked on the glass and waved goodbye, before gratefully heading out of the door.

I went home to take a much needed shower before going over to Mick’s, partly to freshen up, but mostly to try to wake myself up a bit, as it was getting harder and harder to keep my eyes open, and all I really wanted to do was go to bed and sleep. Emerging cleaner, but not as refreshed as I’d hoped, I pulled on a pair of jeans and tee shirt, blow-dried my hair and attempted to put on some mascara without poking myself in the eye, which proved even less easy in my tired state than it usually did. Not sure whether I’d end up staying over at Mick’s again, I packed a small bag with a change of clothes for work in the morning, just in case, quickly stuffing a spare pair of panties into my handbag.

I drove all the way to Mick’s with the car window open and radio on full blast, and somehow managed to stay awake for the duration. Finally, pulling up outside the brownstone building, I laid my head on the steering wheel and wished I’d thought to take some pills for my headache before setting out. Rubbing my temples, I grabbed my purse and got out of the car. Not wanting to appear too eager, I decided to leave the clothes bag stashed in the back of my car, where I could always retrieve it later if need be.

Arriving at last outside Mick’s door, I knocked, and waited. If I’d been feeling better I might have had time to worry about meeting the cleaner, or cleaners, if there was more than one here - they had a fearsome reputation from what I’d heard. As it was, I was too busy concentrating on just staying upright, as my head began to pound in earnest. As the door opened I practically fell inside, having not realised I was leaning against it for support. Mick caught me as I staggered, his face immediately showing concern even as I shrugged off his helping hands.

“Beth… are you okay?” He was bending down to peer into my face, before looking past me as though the cause for my illness might be lurking in the hallway beyond.

“It’s just a headache,” I said, wincing slightly as I held a hand to my temple. “I’ll be fine once I take some pills…”

I glanced about the apartment, expecting to see the other vampires, but the place appeared to be empty save for Josef sitting in an armchair with a drink in his hand. He raised the glass to me in salute as I looked over. 

“Hi Beth.”

“Hi Josef.” I squinted at him briefly, through half closed eyes, before collapsing gratefully onto the couch and leaning my head back against the wonderfully soft cushions in relief.

Mick was standing in front of me, frowning in concern. “Beth… are you sure you’re okay? You look like you need to be tucked up in bed.”

“I’ll be okay… I didn’t want to miss the meeting..” I looked around at the empty apartment, “..although it looks like I did anyway?”

“They left half an hour ago.” He bent down to peer at me closely. “I hope you’ve got some pain pills with you… I don’t tend to keep them… for obvious reasons..”

I nodded. “I could do with a glass of water though… please.”

While Mick was getting the water I pulled my handbag over to search for the tablets. I noticed Josef staring in disbelief as I fumbled for the zipper to open it up. That was when I realised with horror that my spare pair of panties was hanging over the side like some sort of red flag, the lace edging caught tightly between the teeth of the zipper, making it impossible for me to open the bag.

I struggled helplessly for a moment, and didn’t know whether to laugh or cry when Josef came over and kindly helped to disentangle the offending garment from the zipper so that I could open it. Glancing up at him as he struggled to free the material, I could see he was desperately trying not to laugh, and I couldn’t help but let out a snort at the stupidity of the situation.

“Ouch……” I moaned pathetically, putting a hand to my head as the laughter only served to jar my headache even more. “Thank you…” I managed to stutter out between giggles, unable to stop myself, despite the pain, as Josef finally liberated the panties and tucked them deftly away inside my purse just as Mick returned with the water.

“You okay Beth?” Mick asked, a rather confused look on his face as he handed me the glass.

“Fine,” I replied, hoping that Mick wouldn’t notice the blush that suddenly had my face feeling burning hot, “the … er…. zipper.. got stuck…Josef was just helping me with it.” I quickly located the painkillers and busied myself swallowing a couple down as Josef retreated back to his armchair, and proceeded to sit there with a huge smirk on his face.

Mick looked puzzled as he sat down by my side, looking from me to Josef, and back again. “What’s so funny?”

Josef snickered, shaking his head, “Nothing….I don’t know… I’ve just got the giggles for some reason… What’s in this blood anyway?” he said, inspecting his glass with a convincing air of suspicion.

Mick just frowned, giving Josef a doubtful look, and I took the opportunity to kick off my shoes and tuck my legs up underneath me as I snuggled into Mick’s side and laid my head wearily on his shoulder. Instantly his arm came around me, holding me tight against him, and he dropped a kiss on top of my head, his other hand coming around to cup the side of my face as he tenderly stroked a soothing thumb over my temple to rub away the pain. I sighed deeply, closing my eyes and nestling deeper into the crook of his arm, just grateful that I’d missed the meeting, and didn’t have to face a roomful of vampires right now. There was silence for a few moments as I gratefully succumbed to Mick’s ministrations, then I heard someone clearing their throat rather loudly.

“I think this is my cue to leave…” pronounced Josef in a dry tone of voice, “…I seem to be turning rather green and prickly all of a sudden…” 

He stood up and started to make ready to leave. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow Mick. Beth’s obviously in no state to undergo a debriefing right now, so I’ll leave you two lovebirds to it..” he waggled his eyebrows comically.

“Bye Josef” I muttered, giving him a quick glance before my eyes fluttered closed again.

“Bye Beth….. Mick…” I heard footsteps, then the door opening and closing with a click, and finally we were on our own.

Mick shifted position on the couch, pulling me around to sit between his legs and leaning me back against his chest as he put his fingers to my temples and began to massage in slow circles. His hands moved down to my shoulders, starting expertly to knead the knots from my tense muscles, and I let out an involuntary sigh of pleasure, my head rolling back in blessed relief.

“Oh… that feels good…” I murmured, giving myself up to Mick’s hands as they started to work on the back of my neck, “..you really should do this professionally you know…”

Mick snickered, “I don’t really think staring at the backs of people’s necks all day would be a good idea for someone of my ‘persuasion’, do you?”

“Maybe not…” I agreed, laughing.

“Hard day at work?” he asked, his hands moving down to my shoulder blades as his fingers worked their soothing magic on my back.

“You could say that…..” I groaned. 

I told him all about what had happened at work, beginning from the homicide case with the severed head, and ending with the hour and a half I’d spent pretending to read through the second casefile, whilst my tired brain was actually trying to work out how on earth I was going to carry on working on the first case, when I had such a deep personal involvement in it. Added to that the fact that Ben had brushed off my question about the list, and it seemed I was unlikely to be able to get any further information on it, and my day was complete.

After some coaxing, since he didn’t think I was well enough to be discussing it, I persuaded Mick to fill me in on what had occurred at the meeting earlier. Surprisingly, it turned out that Logan’s search on the IP address used to create ‘Hemera’s’ Facebook profile, originated from somewhere within the District Attorney’s office. Whilst this only narrowed it down to one of the hundreds of employees working there, it did throw a different light onto the question of how someone may have discovered that I’d seen the list in the first place. It also meant that it was a distinct possibility that I was working alongside the blackmailer, without any idea as to who they were. 

With regard to a plan of action, they had decided that the best way to handle it was to do nothing for the time being. Josef was going to ignore the Facebooked threat, and in the meantime a coded message was to be sent out to all vamps in the area to be on their guard and ready to re-locate at a moment’s notice. The death of the re-location guy was an obvious setback, and besides the fact that it meant re-locating might not be as easy as we’d thought, it also meant that whoever was behind all this was prepared to kill to get what they wanted. Luckily, Josef had several other sources he could use to arrange new papers for us, and was already in the process of doing just that. Only this time, he was taking every precaution possible as far as discretion was concerned, in order to ensure the safety of his contact.

It also seemed probable that I, Josef, and possibly Mick too, were being followed. For Josef and Mick, this just meant being extra aware and careful, but for me, weakling human that I was, they had decided a full-time babysitter was in order, to keep an eye on me. They had therefore elected to assign one of the cleaners to observe me, with the dual purpose of making sure that nothing untoward happened to me, whilst also hoping to uncover whoever was behind all this.

Although not terribly happy at the thought of being tailed by an unknown vampire - they had also decided it was better I didn’t know who it was, so that I had less chance of giving them away - it was better to be safe than sorry, and it meant that I could carry on working at the D.A.’s office without too much risk to my safety.

“So is that it?” I asked, looking over at Mick from my prone position on the couch, where he’d settled me with a large glass of wine, before taking a seat in the armchair opposite.

He looked down and away, and there was a slight pause before he looked up at me and answered my question. “More or less…..” he hedged.

“More or less?” I repeated, raising my eyebrows at him and giving him a hard stare.

“Just something we threw around, a possible alternative plan, but it’s not been decided yet....” he said evasively. “I’ll fill you in on the details tomorrow when you’re feeling better.”

“Okay…” I had the feeling he was avoiding telling me for some reason, but I let it go. I really wasn’t feeling up to coaxing it out of him if he wasn’t ready to tell me, and my mind was still reeling from the day’s events.

“I have something else to tell you though….” He looked slightly nervous, although happy, as he tapped his fingers on the arm of the chair, smiling. He crossed his legs and looked up at me, a slightly bashful look on his face, despite the broad grin he was wearing. “I…...um……I got the results of some tests today….”

“Tests?” I repeated foolishly, trying to think what he might be talking about. My brain must have been more fuddled than I’d thought, as I just couldn’t think what case we’d been working on that had involved any tests. I set the glass of wine down on the coffee table and sat up straight, frowning as I racked my brain.

Our eyes met across the table, and the look in Mick’s was as serious as I’d ever seen it, yet not in an unhappy way.

“Fertility tests…..” he stated, pausing to let me assimilate the information.

I stared at him stupidly for a moment, my mouth half open with a question I was just about to ask, then seemed to forget.

“You mean…. are you talking about…..you?” 

If he’d been human, I would have said he was blushing. As it was, he looked about as self-conscious as I’d ever seen him as he got up out of his chair and retrieved an envelope from the bookshelf, walking back over to hand it out to me as I sat staring in shock.

“I’d almost forgotten about it… I don’t know what made me remember” he shrugged, “…I had the test done shortly after I took the cure. I was just curious really…. I never expected anything…. Anyway…I went back for them today, and well…. you can read for yourself.”

I opened up the envelope and took out the sheet of paper, scanning the printed results but not really understanding what all the figures meant.

“MOT ninety-five percent…?” I read out, wrinkling my brow in puzzlement. “What does that mean?”

He came over to kneel in front of me, taking my hand in his as he looked up at me. “Well.. basically it means….that I was fertile, Very fertile in fact. They said it was the kind of result they’d have expected to see in an eighteen year old. Not an old man of thirty.” He grinned.

I was at a loss for words, mouthing like a fish, not at all sure quite how to respond to this news.

“So…are you saying that if you could find the cure again, there’s a possibility that you could have children?” I asked tentatively, desperately trying to wrap my head around it.

“Well.. not exactly no……” 

I felt disappointment hit me like a slap in the face as he said those words, and I hadn’t even realised how much I’d wanted this until that moment. It was all too much to take in. He saw my frown and immediately squeezed my hand reassuringly.

“I mean… yes…. probably….but what I’m actually saying is that I….. we….” he looked at me hesitantly as he said it, “…could have children….” He slapped his forehead, laughing at himself as he shook his head. “I’m not explaining myself very well here….what I’m trying to say is that I had a sample frozen…. when I was still human…before Josef turned me back….” His voiced trailed off as he continued to gaze at me.

I was completely gobsmacked. “Oh my God……” was all I could manage. I picked up the wine glass beside me, taking a couple of hefty gulps before setting it back down on the table, then launched myself into Mick’s arms, almost knocking him off balance as he quickly threw out a steadying hand to catch himself, before wrapping his arms around me and hugging me tightly to his chest.

When I could finally speak, I disentangled myself, pulling back slightly and gazing at Mick in wonder, smiling at the look of pure happiness written all over his face. Taking his head in my hands, I drew his mouth to mine and kissed him soundly on the lips. Not a passionate kiss, but one full of love, and of hope for the future. We were both smiling as we drew apart.

Grinning from ear to ear, I couldn’t help but tease him a little.

“So…. you want me to have your baby?”

He laughed, looking a bit embarrassed as he lowered his eyes before raising them to meet mine again. “Well…. I… er….” He laughed again, not seeming to know quite how to finish the sentence.

“Are we agreed on Elliott then?” I asked, grinning at him wickedly.

He looked back at me quite seriously, cocking his head on one side as if considering it.

“Well….. only if it’s a boy,” he smiled.

 

To be continued/………………………

 

________________________________________________


	21. Let's Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Rating: This chapter PG-13
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 21

*Jacqui Kostan’s office, February 2014*

Staring at the photographs on my desk, mixed emotions are fighting for dominance within me. On the one hand, the boiling anger I feel demands that I take revenge for what’s been done to me and my family, and I want nothing more than to tear apart those responsible with my bare hands. I can still see the look on Josef’s face when they’d dumped his broken and bleeding body at my feet. Punishment for what we’d done. For what I’d done. And yet on the other, the mother in me is urging caution. I have my daughter to protect, and I can’t just go running off willy nilly to exact retribution. For one thing, I’d likely get myself killed in the process. It would be foolish in the extreme to attempt to go up against vampires more than fifty times my age. Never act in anger they say; revenge is a dish best served cold. Time enough for avengement when I’ve had time to properly plan out my strategy. I’m a vampire now, and I need to start thinking like one. Time’s the one thing I do have plenty of.

The guilt’s the worst part of it. Knowing that everything that’s happened is my fault. If it hadn’t been for me, Mick and Josef would almost certainly still be living happy lives right now. Going about their daily business as they had been for countless years before I was even born. If I hadn’t been so selfish in wanting to be with Mick, if I’d just told him about the danger instead of taking things into my own hands, maybe things would have been different. And my selfish desire for something that fate had decreed should not be my destiny, had almost certainly been the cause of Josef’s demise. He’d done if for me, and unfortunately he’d been the one to pay the price. 

It’s pointless to dwell on what might have been though. To torture myself with the ‘what ifs’ and the ‘maybes’. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, but it can’t change the past. If things hadn’t happened the way they did I might never have had my beautiful daughter, and I wouldn’t change that for the world. She’s the most precious thing in my life; the one right thing to have come out of the whole tragic mess. Reaching my hand out to touch the glass, I stroke my finger lovingly over her blond curls, and smile in spite of myself.

With a sigh, I shake myself out of these negative thoughts to concentrate on the here and now. Evie’s waiting for me to pick her up, and I need to stop brooding and get moving. Shrugging on my jacket, I grab my keys and handbag, and switching off the lights on the way out, I set the alarm and lock up.

The night air is deliciously cool against my skin as I step out into the parking lot, the smell of winter jasmine infusing it’s delicate fragrance into the air. The moon is high in the sky now, much smaller than before, illuminating the darkness with a silvery white glow and casting shadows that throw everything into stark relief. Looking up at the night sky, I can see literally thousands of stars twinkling amidst the inky blackness of space. It still takes my breath away every time I look at the heavens these days. Before I became a vampire they all looked the same colour to me; basically appearing in varying degrees of white. Now I see colours dotted all over the place, ranging from an icy blue to a fiery orange, some pinkish, others pale yellow, and some with a very faint tinge of green. It fascinates me to think that these myriad hues have been there all along without me ever realising it, and it makes me wonder what other hidden phenomenon are out there hiding just beneath the threshold of our limited perception.

With one last glance at the awe-inspiring sight above me, I press the button on the car remote and climb into the sleek red Ferrari, sinking down into the plush seat, and inhaling that wonderful new-leather smell that never seems to age. Josef would probably turn in his grave if he knew I was driving it, and I couldn’t help but grin with the knowledge. I flicked on his iPod and turned the key in the ignition, thrilled at the throaty roar as the engine gunned to life. Reversing carefully, I pulled out of the parking lot, cranking the stereo up to full blast, and floored the accelerator. Instantly I was thrust back in my seat as the car surged forward in what felt like a rocket powered burst of speed. I absolutely knew why Josef had loved this car.

The selection of music on Josef’s iPod was strange to say the least; a bizarre mixture of genres and eras, ranging from Baroque, through classical Mozart, to modern day pop, and just about everything in between. I guess living for over four hundred years will do that to a person. The song currently blaring out of the speakers, Duffy’s ‘Mercy’, brings back memories. It reminds me of the day Mick took me to meet his ‘other girlfriends’ as he had called them. I’d been a bit dubious at the time, and a teensy bit jealous too if I’m honest, but that evening had turned out to be one of the best dates we’d ever had. 

***************

It had been three days since the Morrison murder, and ‘Hemera’s’ Facebooked ransom demand. I was about as fed up with work as I ever thought possible, and longing for the weekend to hurry up and arrive. All I wanted to do was put my feet up, relax, and hopefully spend some much needed quality time with my new boyfriend. Mick and I had both been running around like busy fools for the last few days, and a little time out was way overdue.

He’d been trying to track down the teenage son of a local wealthy businessman, who’d stolen his father’s yacht and was last seen headed toward Santa Catalina Island with his underage girlfriend on board. Sea voyages and sun obviously not being a good combination for a vampire, Mick had spent most of the time hunkered down below deck on board the vessel he’d chartered, pretending to be sea sick, while he hid from the extra debilitating effects of the sun reflecting off the surface of the water. He’d found no trace of either the boy or his father’s cruiser, only to discover that the abandoned yacht had been discovered anchored in a small private bay a few miles up the coast just hours before. After another fruitless search, he’d finally had to give in and return to his loft for some essential freezer time, before his sunstroke got out of hand.

I hadn’t fared much better, suffering through a gruelling two hour appointment with the coroner who’d carried out the post mortem on Mr Morrison. He’d painstakingly gone over the full gruesome details of exactly how the head had been severed from the body. It was one of those mornings when I dearly wished I’d not had such a hearty breakfast. The only saving grace was that he was almost certain the victim had already been dead at the time, having received four bullet wounds in the chest prior to the decapitation. 

The instrument used had turned out to be a common kitchen knife, and could have been purchased from any one of a million retailers. It certainly wasn’t going to help us find the killer. Ballistics had run a computerized gun print on the bullets found lodged in Mr Morrision’s heart and lungs, and we had the make and model of the gun; only problem was finding the owner. Trawling through the records of firearms dealers to try to find the names of persons who had purchased the particular make and model of gun, was a much more long winded process, and pointless unless we had some idea of for whom we were looking.

Mrs Millen, the unfortunate dog-walker, hadn’t come up with any additional information, so all we had to go on was that the killing most likely had something to do with Mr Morrision’s sideline in fake IDs; something the police had picked up on after examining the contents of his apartment. My heart had skipped a beat when I heard that the police had discovered the incriminating evidence, although Josef had already confirmed that he hadn’t handed over any information that could compromise us in any way. Luckily only blank documents and printing equipment had been found, and there was no trace whatsoever of any client records. Josef had been intending to procure the necessary photographs the following day, but hearing about the murder had obviously put paid to his plans. 

So, for now at least, our secret was safe, although how much longer depended on ‘Hemera’, and what they decided to do about the fact that Josef had so far completely ignored the message. Strangely, no other threat had been made, although had Josef not happened to check his e-mail that day, or bothered to sign into to Facebook to check the message, it was entirely possible that he may never have seen it in the first place, so maybe the blackmailer assumed that was the case. It was all a bit of a mystery, and certainly not the M.O. of a professional blackmailer.

I’d also Googled ‘Hemera’, and discovered that aside from being a Turkish resort and spa (which I quickly discounted as being in any way relevant), according to ancient Greek mythology, ‘Hemera’ was denoted as goddess of the daytime. It seemed an apt name for someone bent on extorting ‘creatures of the night’, and didn’t bode well for the possibility that the blackmailer was bluffing. I’d tried to track down the IP address Logan had traced for us, but information on computers within the D.A.’s office was strictly confidential and I’d hit a dead end with my inquiries. As Logan had pointed out, it was also quite possible that someone had tapped into the WiFi network from a laptop or suchlike, and although it was likely, there was no guarantee that the person actually worked there.

After three days spent obtaining evidential statements from both witnesses and victims of crime, and what seemed like three nights filling out the mountains of paperwork that went with it, I was quickly coming to the conclusion that working as a civilian investigator was not all it was cracked up to be. I hadn’t realised how restricting working within the confines of the law would be, and I really missed the thrill of the chase when there was a hot story going down. In fact I was sorely tempted to hand in my notice, and probably would have done had it not been for the fact that Ben Talbot was the one person who held the key to my finding out more about the list, and it’s origins. So I stuck it out, consoling myself with the thought that if the worst happened, and relocation did become necessary, at least Mick and I would be going together.

As Friday afternoon drew to a close, I prepared myself for yet another attempt at gleaning some much needed information on the list from Ben, and pasting on a cheerily enthusiastic smile, I made my way over to his office and tapped gently on the door.

He looked up somewhat distractedly, smiling when he saw it was me, and I immediately felt a little pang of guilt at my duplicitous intentions. 

“Hey Beth. How’s it going?”

“Great, thanks,” I lied, licking my lips nervously, “I’m really enjoying the job…” I paused at the whopping great lie, my mind desperately searching for a suitable in-road to the topic of the list. “I’ve just finished up with the statements,” I smiled, heaping the files onto the corner of Ben’s desk, “I thought maybe you’d like me to take another look at those names I was investigating before I finish up for the day?” Adding as an afterthought, “It would be refreshing to have something different to look at for an hour or so, after slogging through all those testimonies…” 

He leaned back in his chair, smiling at me warmly, “Honestly Beth…. don’t worry about it. It’s low priority at the moment, and if you’re all finished up I’d rather you took an early night and went home. You deserve it after all the hard work you’ve done over the last few days…” He sat up and snapped the file on his desk shut, “And I won’t be far behind you… it’s been a long week and I’m getting nowhere fast here.”

I pasted the smile more firmly on my face, determined not to be deflected so easily. “Oh, but I hate leaving a job half done… once I start something I do like to finish it… and it really wouldn’t be a hardship. It‘s not like I have anything better to do…. If you could just give me some more information on exactly what I’m looking for, I’m sure I could come up with something. There’s nothing I like to get my teeth into more than a good mystery….” I beamed hopefully at him.

He looked at me thoughtfully for a moment, and I could see him weighing it up in his mind. Then, to my chagrin, he shook his head. “Case is closed Beth. Forget it.”  
I knew better than to pursue it further at that point, so I just smiled sweetly while I inwardly gnashed my teeth in frustration. “Okay… you’re the boss. Thanks… and have a good weekend.” I made my way to the door, glancing back over my shoulder to flash another smile on my way out. “See you Monday.”

“You too…… night Beth.” I heard him say as I clicked the door shut.

I cursed silently. So much for getting information about the list! It looked like that topic of conversation was a no go from now on. Ben had made it clear in no uncertain terms that he wasn’t going to be forthcoming with any further information on the subject. I felt defeated, knowing that Mick and the others were depending on me to find out where the list had come from, and I’d failed them completely.

Driving home in my car, I took a cursory glance around, as I was wont to do from time to time, to see if I could catch sight of the vampire who’d been assigned to tail me, but as with every other time I’d tried, I could see absolutely no one. It creeped me out slightly to know that it was so easy for someone to follow me without my being aware of it, and not for the first time, I wondered at just how closely I was being watched. Shaking off the uncomfortable feeling, I tried to look on the positive side. At least if there was someone out there with any intentions of further head-rolling, hopefully I had back up on hand. Or at least I hoped that was the case - the cleaner wasn’t really there to be a bodyguard; the primary objective was finding out who the blackmailer was.

Mick wasn’t due to pick me up until seven thirty, so I had plenty of time to relax and get ready for our impending date. I was intrigued about the mystery outing that Mick had planned, and especially so about the interestingly termed ‘other’ girlfriends that he was planning on introducing me to. We’d only known each other for a few months (well at least if I didn’t count the time since he’d saved me from his deranged wife and then proceeded to stalk me for the next twenty-two years), but I thought I’d gotten to know him pretty well during that time, and not once had I head him mention this apparent hoard of female acquaintances. I was curious, and if I was honest, a little bit jealous too.

All he would tell me was that there was dancing involved, which wasn’t much to go on. Was he talking about a barn dance? Or would we be boogying the night away in some night club somewhere? I really didn’t want to turn up at a club in a checked shirt, jeans and cowboy boots, and similarly, arriving at a barn dance dressed in killer heels and a come-get-me dress would be highly embarrassing. 

In the end I settled for a blue flared skirt and cream lace top, that I hoped would be suitable for either, choosing a pair of medium heeled court shoes that wouldn’t have my feet crippled by the end of the evening. I curled my hair and added some natural looking make up, and I was done. Having learned from past experience, I’d foregone the comfortable work underwear in favour of one of my new sets of sexy lingerie, and I even had a spare pair of knickers neatly folded and tucked securely at the bottom of my handbag, where there was no danger of them falling out.

I was set to go.

*************

An hour later I was ensconced at a table with Beryl, Edna, Queenie, Mavis and Gladys, being given the third degree about my courtship with ‘Young Micky’ as they referred to him.

“How long has he been wooing you dear?” asked Mavis, as the others all looked on smiling encouragingly.

For some strange reason I blushed at the term ‘wooing’ - it sounded so old fashioned and romantic. “Just a month or so…” I stammered, “well… we’ve known each other a lot longer than that, but we’ve only started dating just recently..” I looked nervously at the women, who were all staring back at me like potential mothers-in-law weighing me up for suitable wife material.

“Ahhh…..” they all murmured in unison, nodding and making clucking noises.

“Have you discussed marriage yet?” inquired Queenie.

“Queenie!” exclaimed Gladys, digging her friend in the ribs, “the lass said they’d only been courting for a few weeks… give them a chance!” 

“He’s a wonderful catch my love,” Queenie carried on, ignoring her companion, “such a lovely young man. Impeccable manners, good-looking, a marvellous dancer… and he has good career prospects… works as a P.A. I understand …”

“P.I. dear” corrected Gladys.

“And I‘m sure he‘d make a wonderful father,” chipped in Beryl, “no doubt you’d want to start a family as soon as possible at your age..”

I was momentarily struck speechless. At my age?! I’m sure she meant it kindly, but the little dig about my age has me bristling - twenty-six wasn’t old, was it?

Edna reached across the table and laid her hand on my arm, smiling kindly, “Don’t you mind them sweetheart. You’ve got plenty of time yet.”

“Oh yes… plenty of time…...” they all chorused in unison, patting my arm.

Luckily for me, Mick returned to the table at that point, setting down a tray of drinks, gin and tonics and stouts for the old ladies, and a very welcome glass of wine for me. I grabbed my glass and downed half of it in a couple of large gulps, feeling their eyes on me, no doubt wondering whether Mick’s ‘intended’ was some kind of lush.

We were in an old hall that reminded me of being back in school. There was wooden flooring, and a stage at one end, upon which stood a set of speakers that looked like they’d seen better days, and in the other corner, somewhat haphazardly arranged, some ancient looking disco lights. At the other end of the room was a small bar, and lined up down each side of the dance floor were rows of tables with hard plastic chairs . The hall was currently lit by strips of unflattering fluorescent lighting, and I felt for all the world like I was back at my school prom, except that the patrons seemed to vary in age hugely, ranging anywhere from about eighteen to eighty, with the vast majority looking to be at least sixty or older. Modern Jive wasn’t exactly what I’d have chosen to do had Mick actually asked me, but now that we were here I was determined to make the best of it and at least give it a go.

Ominously, the lights dimmed, and a whine from the speakers heralded the entry of our dance tutors, as they began preparations for the lesson.

“Any ladies without a partner, please stand in the corner and you’ll be brought on as soon as possible”, announced the teacher.

“That’ll be us then,” sighed Edna, gesturing for the others to get up and follow her, “come on girls!” 

Off they bustled, leaving me and Mick alone. He held out his hand to me in a very old fashioned gesture, and I couldn’t help but smile as he helped me to my feet and led me across the floor to line up with the other couples already standing ready. Once we’d all sorted ourselves out, and were positioned in three lines down the middle of the dancefloor, men on one side, and ladies on the other, the instructor informed us we were about to learn the ‘Push Spin’.

“Okay… everybody ready?” he asked, and we all dutifully snapped to attention. “Man’s left to lady’s right,” he instructed, and Mick lightly took hold of my right hand. “Don’t grasp too tightly….. just keep it loose,” he said in a low voice, as I curled my fingers around his, and hastily uncurled them again. 

“Take a small step back,” came the next instruction, and we all complied. So far so good; I could cope with this I thought, beginning to feel a little more relaxed as Mick and I lightly held on to the tips of each others fingers. 

“Step in,” he continued, talking to the men, “and place your right hand around the lady’s waist, taking your left hand to your left shoulder.” I was suddenly held tightly against Mick’s side with his arm across my waist and my hand resting on his shoulder. “The lady should be snug to your right hand side facing in opposite directions.” I grinned up at Mick, thinking this wasn’t half as bad as I’d feared.

“Step back on your left leg as you twist the lady clockwise.” Confident, at this point, in my dancing prowess, I spun around as instructed as Mick lifted his hand, then promptly stumbled over my own feet and only just managed to catch my footing before I made a complete idiot of myself.

“Oops!” I laughed, subtly moving back into position and hoping that no one had noticed.

“You’re supposed to spin in the other direction,” Mick whispered, leaning in and putting his mouth against my ear as he spoke. “Clockwise…” he twiddled his fingers, “as in the same direction as a clock’s hands,” he finished with a smile.

“Okay!” I hissed under my breath. “New at this… I’m sure you had to learn once..”

“What? Learn what direction a clock’s hands go in?” he asked innocently.

I studiously ignored that comment, and concentrated on the tutor’s instructions as he told us the next steps.

“Return the lady to her previous position, with the left hand held up at chest height, palm to palm, your thumb to your right hand side.” We duly manoeuvred ourselves thus. “Now push her to spin three hundred and sixty degrees clockwise.” I made certain I turned the correct way this time, shooting Mick a ‘so there’ look as I did so. “And step back under tension.” Mick grinned at me as we stepped away from each other, only our fingertips still connected.

“Step in and bring the lady in to return.” I managed to spin in the correct direction once more. “And step back under tension.”

“Well done.” Mick congratulated me, still holding fast to my hand as he smiled at me warmly. “You’ve just learned your first basic move. Only another nineteen to go, and we’ll soon have you jiving around the dancefloor like a pro.”

I paled, “Nineteen?” I could barely remember the one we’d just done, let alone another nineteen!

“Don’t worry,” he laughed, giving my hand a reassuring squeeze, “you’ll only be learning three tonight, and they’ll go through it again a few more times before you have to do it to music.”.

We did indeed go through it a few more times, and although I made a couple of mistakes, I was starting to quite enjoy myself. When we were ready to give it a go to the music, Mick gave my hand another comforting squeeze. “Just relax and follow my lead… you’ll be fine..”

There was something so normal about dancing with Mick. Thinking about it, I realised this was the first time we’d ever really had ‘fun’ together, like a normal couple. It was one occasion where I totally forgot about him being a vampire, and just got to enjoy the happy fun-loving Mick that resided somewhere beneath the surface of the more restrained and serious man I’d come to know.

He was an excellent dancer, and I soon learned not to try to ‘lead’, but rather to follow where he lead me, and go with the flow. He kept up a running commentary of what he was about to do, telling me in advance what way I was going, as his hands on my waist or my shoulder gently nudged me in the right direction. All too soon though, we were moving on, as the ladies who’d been standing patiently in the corner were brought on, and the rest of us moved along to accommodate them. I found myself with a new partner; a grey haired man of about sixty or seventy, who unfortunately turned out to know as little as I did about jiving, so we stumbled about together, doing our best, and laughing at our mistakes, as we bumped each other and tried to catch with all the wrong hands.

Mick, I noticed, with a twinge a jealousy, was dancing with a dark-haired young girl, who looked to be about eighteen or nineteen. Looking stunning in black leggings and a long floral top, she was also an excellent dancer, and she and Mick looked great as they swayed and sashayed in time to the music, hands in the right places at the right times, and spins beautifully controlled and caught. They were both grinning broadly, obviously enjoying themselves, and with a pang, I felt myself wishing I was her, or at least that I could dance like she did.

Several times we changed partners, and each one was a new experience. Some were fantastic dancers, like Mick, and others had even less of a clue than I did. All in all though, it was a huge amount of fun. As the lesson came to an end, the instructor shouted out that we were to continue in freestyle, and I went into momentary panic mode, but I needn’t have worried; the man I was dancing with turned out to be a very patient teacher, and kindly stuck to the three basic moves we’d just learnt, until I was doing them almost without thinking.

As the music came to an end, my partner thanked me for the dance, and I thanked him profusely for his kind tolerance and understanding. Making my way back to the table, I noticed Mick heading back onto the dancefloor with Gladys in tow, and sat down to watch as I sipped my wine. For a large woman, Gladys was amazingly light on her feet, and I was fascinated observing them as they moved expertly in time with the music. It was like watching an episode of Come Dancing as they glided to and fro, Gladys seeming to effortlessly anticipate each subtle hand gesture, as Mick guided her skilfully about the floor. After he and Gladys had finished, Edna and Queenie both had their turns, and I wondered just how long exactly Mick had been doing this; they all seemed to know each other’s moves inside out..

After another round of drinks and a short respite, Mick once again hauled me onto the floor. It was one of my favourite songs playing, Duffy’s ‘Mercy’, and I was really quite looking forward to having my turn with the best looking, not to mention extremely expert dancing, delectable hunk of male loveliness, who I’d been watching with my tongue hanging out for the past half hour. Relaxed a little by the wine, and finding the music quite an easy beat to dance to, I don’t think I did too badly at all. Maybe not up to Gladys’ standard, but very passable for a beginner I reckoned. Feeling his hand in mine, and his arm around my waist, I felt like I was falling in love with him all over again. I’d never really met this carefree young man before, and I decided that I liked him. I liked him a lot.

“Ready for a bit a Salsa?” he said, and before I could answer, I was drawn into his arms, his hand coming around my back as he held me close, dancing pressed tightly together so that I could feel the muscles in his legs moving against mine as he swung us around in Latin-American style. It was so unbelievably sexy that if we hadn’t been in the middle of a crowded dancefloor, I’d have been just about ready to throw him down on the nearest available surface and rid his body of every shred of clothing he had on. Just as my dirty little mind began to wander, he released me and used his hand on my waist to push me into a spin, and we were suddenly back jiving again. I had to concentrate to keep my eyes off of his gyrating hips and tightly muscled ass though, and I had to pinch myself to remind me that this gorgeous man was mine!

Finally, the song finished, and reluctantly I took my seat back at the table, while Mick held out a hand each to Beryl and Mavis, and all three strode out onto the floor. Interested to see how he was intending to dance with the both of them at the same time, I swivelled my chair around so I could watch.

By the time the song ended, my mouth was hanging open in amazement. How on earth they’d all managed to synchronise their movements so perfectly had me completely baffled. It was like pure poetry in motion. 

“That was excellent!” I congratulated them, genuinely amazed, as they arrived back at the table, Mavis and Beryl a little breathless, while Mick looked fresh as a daisy and ready to go ten rounds with Mike Tyson.

“Plenty of practise..” smiled Beryl.

“And necessitated by the distinct lack of men to dance with!” laughed Mavis.

We stayed for a couple more songs, and I had one final dance with Mick, before he started making motions to leave, explaining to the ‘girls’ that we had yet to eat, and apologising that we couldn’t stay longer. Having kissed and hugged them all goodbye, we finally made our way out to the parking lot, Mick’s arm draped over my shoulder protectively, and big smiles on both our faces.

“That was so much fun!” I said, climbing into the car.

Mick turned to look at me as he pulled his door shut and fumbled in his pocket for the keys. “Glad you enjoyed it. I wanted to see them all one more time…..” he paused, gazing down as his thoughts seemed to drift for a moment, “….if it turns out we have to leave….” His voice trailed off, and he let out a soft sigh. Looking suddenly back up at me and grinning broadly, he added, “And they’ve been just dying to meet you… they’ve been wanting to get me married off for years!”

Married? My heart leapt for a moment before I swiftly pushed the thought aside. We were just joking around here right? He wasn’t saying he wanted to marry me…get a grip!

“And don’t forget the kids…” I snickered, “.. apparently we should be starting right away since I’m not getting any younger!” I rolled my eyes.

Mick snorted. “Well…. you are pushing thirty…” He sneaked a sideways look at me and ducked as I swatted him on the shoulder.

As the laughter died away, silence fell, and Mick gave me a somewhat regretful smile - one that I wasn‘t quite sure how to interpret - before turning the key and heading back to his loft.

*************

Mick had originally planned to take me out to dinner, but given our present situation, what with the possibility that we were being watched by the blackmailer, he decided that him sitting at a restaurant not eating, while I tucked into a large meal, wasn’t exactly the best of ideas at the moment. Instead, he’d decided to cook for me at his place and give me a rain check on dinner.

“Mmmm…… smells delicious!” I called through to Mick, who was currently bustling around the kitchen, rustling me up a homemade pizza and garlic bread.

I tried to feel guilty that I was the one draped over the couch with my feet up, holding a glass of wine, whilst Mick was slaving over a hot stove,. But all I could think was how lucky I was that a man who didn’t even eat, seemed more than happy to spend his time cooking up culinary delights for me.

“Ever thought about opening up your own restaurant?” I enquired, gesturing rather over-enthusiastically with my wine glass, and very nearly spilling it all over the cushions. I think I’d had more to drink than I realised, I was certainly beginning to feel quite warm and fuzzy all of a sudden.

He shook his head. “Not great hours for a vampire, and besides…..it’s hard work.” He grinned. “Makes being a P.I. seem like a walk in the park…”

“Well… it’s always good to have a back up plan in case the work ever dries up.” I toasted him, taking another gulp and sinking back against the edge of the couch as I kicked off my shoes and wiggled my feet down into the cushions.

The pizza was absolutely delicious, as I knew it would be, and I’d scoffed down four large slices and three pieces of garlic bread before I decided I was going to get very plump rather quickly if I didn’t watch it. Mick had returned to the kitchen with the dishes, and I saw him head to his ‘secret’ fridge, no doubt to get himself some liquid sustenance.

Putting the wine glass down on the table, the words were out of my mouth before I’d really had time to think about what I was saying. “Mick……” I said, holding out my arm, wrist turned upwards in invitation. “Why don’t you feed from me….?” 

He stopped, his hand halfway to the cupboard, and turned to look at me, the expression on his face incredulous. “What?” He asked, looking slightly confused, as though he thought he might not have heard me correctly.

“I said feed from me.” I replied, looking him directly in the eye. “It’s only fair… you cooked me a wonderful meal, and now it’s my turn to return the favour.”

He hesitated, and I could tell he was in two minds as he lowered the empty glass he was holding to the worktop, and looked back at me. “Beth…..” he paused again, seeming to flounder with his words, “….drinking from you when we make love is one thing…. feeding from you… that’s something else entirely.”

“Not that I don’t want to….” he said quickly, as my face fell, “but you’re not ‘food’ to me… you’re the woman I’m in love with.” he said softly, walking over to take my hand, which was still held out towards him in invitation.

“But I’d like to know what it’s like… you know… without the whole sex thing…..at least once…” I raised pleading eyes to his, “even if you never do it again.” I was starting to think I’d had way too much wine already; it wasn’t like me to beg like this, but I couldn’t seem to help myself. When he’d fed from me in the desert, the overwhelming feelings had been of regret, revulsion and despair. There had been a strange kind of pleasure too, I did remember that, but that had been far outweighed by the more negative emotions. I hadn’t experienced anything like the feelings that Mick’s previous freshies had apparently felt, and I really wanted to know what that felt like. I needed to know.

“Beth….” He was shaking his head, but I could see that at least a small part of him wanted to do this, even if he wasn’t willing to admit it.

“Please Mick..”

Seeing him still undecided, I decided to pull out the big guns. “After what happened in the desert, it would be nice to have a good experience to remember….” I let my words trail off and gazed at him hopefully.

“Beth… I’m sorry your first experience had to be that way, I honestly am, but drinking from you just for pleasure….like a freshie….I’m not sure I could do that..” He sat down next to me and stared at me earnestly as he held my hand in his lap.

“Besides..” he grinned, “I think you might have had just a little too much wine… and you might regret it in the morning.”

“One,” I began, pulling my hand from his and holding up a finger at him, “I have not had too much to drink…. well maybe a little… but I’m still perfectly capable of making decisions on my own. And two..” I held up a second finger, “..if you’re anywhere near as good as you’ve boasted you are….”

He let out a muffled snort, and I knew I’d got him with that one. “Then there is no way I’m gonna regret this… not now, not in the morning, not ever!. So unless that was all hot air you were blowing about your ‘superior bite capabilities’, then you’d better put your mouth where your mouth is, and prove it to me.”

He looked down, shaking his head again, but he was smiling, and I knew I’d made my point. He picked my hand up again, and a little shiver of anticipation went through me as he turned it palm up, his fingers stroking lightly over the delicate veins just beneath the surface of my skin. Closing his eyes, he brought it his nose, inhaling the scent as he swept his lips light as a feather across the sensitive skin of my inner arm. I couldn’t help but draw in a sharp breath, as a bolt of longing suddenly stabbed through me in anticipation of what was to come. I breathed out raggedly, stunned at the intensity of what I was already feeling, even though he’d barely touched me.

“Are you okay?” He looked up at me, and although I should have been expecting it, I was still surprised to see that his eyes had already changed to the luminous silver that signalled the change to his vampire self. I could see the points of fangs protruding ever so slightly at the corners of his mouth, and my insides clenched again at the thought of them sinking into my skin, and the pleasure they would ultimately, hopefully, bring.

I nodded, temporarily struck dumb as I gazed into those glowing eyes.

“You’ve no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do this.” he breathed, stunning me even more with the unexpected admission. “Don’t be scared Beth… I couldn’t hurt you if I tried..” He moved up and began to nuzzle the side of my throat, dropping small butterfly kisses wherever his lips touched.

The hairs stood up on the back of my neck, and although I knew there was no need to be afraid, my heart started hammering in my chest, and I couldn’t help but feel slightly nervous. It was strange to be feeling so apprehensive, but at the same time so aroused. My arms drew him closer as his mouth caressed along my throat, and I pressed his head closer, winding my fingers through his hair, unconsciously trying to press his mouth more closely against my skin.

“One last chance to back out…” he whispered, his breath creating delicious vibrations against my skin as he spoke. I felt the sharp points of his fangs graze lightly against me, and the touch of his tongue as it traced a wet path along the vein, now throbbing in time to my heartbeat. Mick’s hand wound it’s way through my hair and cupped the back of my head, while the other one curved around my back, holding me in a firm grasp, and effectively restricting my means of escape.

“Beth…” he repeated when I didn’t answer, “are you sure you want this?”

I‘d never been more sure of anything in my life. “Yes, I’m sure. But for crying out loud Mick….” the expectation was killing me, and I wasn’t sure how much longer I could hold out, “would you just do it already!”

The last word came out as a strangled cry as he chose that moment to sink his teeth into my neck, and my entire body went rigid with the shock of it. The acute burning sensation stung like I’d been pierced with a thousand tiny needles, and for a moment I couldn’t breathe with the impact of it. Then, all of a sudden, like someone flicking a switch, it felt as though a dam of bliss had been released within me, pulsing in waves through my veins as it flowed like a river throughout my entire body. It was like being hit by a ton of bricks, except that instead of hard clay, it was pure joy, and I could only allow the feeling to wash over me, completely bowled over by it, and able only to submit to the mind-blowing euphoria that held me captive and helpless in it’s wake.

Distantly, I was aware of Mick’s mouth moving against my throat, could feel the contractions of his throat as he swallowed, and the electrifying touch of his tongue as he lapped against the wound he’d created.

“Oh my God…..” I breathed, my hands slipping through his hair and falling to rest about his waist, as my body floated in seventh heaven, utterly intoxicated by the rush of endorphins flooding like lightning throughout my system. All I could do was close my eyes and give myself up to it. 

For long moments time seemed to ebb and flow, until Mick’s face abruptly appeared before mine. I hadn’t even felt him withdraw his fangs. His eyes still shone luminous silver as he stared down at me, his thumb stroking circles over my cheek as his other hand smoothed back the hair from the side of my face. A thin trickle of blood ran down his chin, and I stared at it, fascinated as it snaked it’s way like a river over the contours of his face. Reaching up, I used my thumb to catch the droplet before it fell, and without thinking, brought it to my mouth to lick it clean, tasting the sweet, coppery flavour in my mouth.

We both stared at each other for a moment, not quite sure what to say, and still kind of lost in the moment.

“Remind me never to do that when you’ve been drinking bagged blood.” I said, completely breaking the tension of the moment, as he practically choked on his laughter.

“Will do..” he sniggered, his eyes shifting back to their usual hazel blue hue.

“So…..” he looked down at me through half lidded eyes, the corners of his mouth turning up in an undisguised smirk, “….how was it for you honey?”

I stared back at those gorgeous hazel eyes with their long black lashes, smiling down at me, and my stomach turned to mush. I was determined not to feed his overblown ego though. “Hmmmm……” I pondered, screwing my face up and pretending to mull it over “ … I dunno…. I think there might have been something there… but I’m not quite sure…….” I gave him an innocent look, “it was kind of hard to tell…”. What with the complete rapture and everything going on at the time it had been a little difficult to concentrate. Understatement of the year…

I looked up at him under my lashes, “Maybe you should try it again, and I’ll see if I can pay attention this time….” 

“Okay…” he held up a finger just as I had earlier, “One…. no second go. If you weren’t paying attention the first time, you’ll just have to wait. Two….” A second finger shot up, “there was absolutely no way you didn’t get your rocks off just now…… and three…”

“Excuse me!” I interrupted him, my mouth gaping in surprise at the language he’d used, “Last time I checked I’m sure I didn’t have any ‘rocks’ buster.” 

“And three….” He continued, ignoring my comment, and slurring his words slightly, “I think someone was telling porky pies when she said she hadn’t had all that much to drink. I can barely see straight…” he giggled.

“Well….” I looked a bit sheepish, “I’m maybe just a tad tipsy. Anyway…” I fixed him with an accusing stare, “you were the one plying me with all the drink!”

He snickered at that. “Okay, you’ve got me there… it’s just been a while since I’ve felt like this. It’s like being a teenager again, and having my first taste of cider…I‘m scared to stand up in case I fall over..” He lowered his head and tried to stifle another bout of the giggles.

“But I didn’t think you could get drunk?” I said, honestly not having realised that the alcohol in my blood would have this effect on him.

“I can’t… not normally anyway. I only drink whiskey because I like the taste. It’s one of the few things that actually doesn’t taste like cardboard. But filter it through someone’s digestive system and into their bloodstream...” he gestured circles with his hand, “and you have yourself a walking bar at your disposal.” He cocked an eyebrow at me. “Not that I consider you a walking bar of course…”

“Of course…” I smiled, thinking I’d never seen him act so cute. The effect of the drink had softened and relaxed him in a way I’d ever seen before. He seemed almost more human now than when he’d actually been (albeit only temporarily) human, and I just wanted to wrap him in my arms and hold onto this carefree Mick for as long as I could.

He collapsed back against the cushions, pulling me with him and snuggling me in against his side. “We’re going to make this thing work, aren’t we?” he asked out of the blue, suddenly looking very vulnerable. “I really couldn’t bear to lose you, you know…” 

“Of course we’ll make it work,” I said immediately. He’d looked so forlorn when he said it. “I don’t know how exactly…but we’ll find a way.” 

He didn’t answer, just drawing me tighter against him, his thumb rubbing circles over my arm. There wasn’t really an answer he could give, since he’d already more or less told me he didn’t want to turn me. How we were going to make this work was an unanswered question, but I knew I didn’t relish the idea of growing old while Mick remained the same. There was going to come a point, if we stayed together, where something would have to give.

“Beth….” he started. But no other words were forthcoming.

I turned to look up at him. He was looking back at me with a strange expression on his face. It was the kind of look that made you want to hold your breath, and I found myself doing exactly that.

“Beth…you know I love you…” he began again.

“I know. I love you too.” I reached up and gave him a lingering kiss, savouring the taste of his lips, and his breath against my cheek.

As I drew back, he sat up, pulling us both into a sitting position on the sofa, and took my hand in his. He took a deep breath and looked at me in earnest. Not knowing quite what to expect, my heart started to thump in my chest, and a sinking feeling began in the pit of my stomach, as I wondered whether maybe he’d thought better of pursuing a relationship with a human after all.

“I’d ask you to marry me, but I’m not even sure I’m not still technically married to Coraline….” he said, with a snort of resigned laughter.

Stunned, I could only stare at him in shock.

“But I do want to be with you Beth, for as long as we have together.” He paused, taking another deep breath. “And I’d like that to be as long as possible…. so….. if you do ever decide you want to be turned…..” He stopped there, seemingly unable to complete the sentence.

He leaned forward until his forehead was touching mine, and I could feel the emotion coming off him in waves as he cupped my face between his hands.

“I’ll turn you if you want it,” he whispered, “but only if it’s what you want. If it’s not what you want, then I won’t try to change your mind. Either way, I want to be with you.”

I was so full of emotion I didn’t trust myself to speak. So I simply closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around Mick’s shoulders, our foreheads still pressed together as the tears began to roll down my cheeks.

Finally pulling apart to look at him, I couldn’t help but giggle.

“You are so incredibly sappy when you’ve had too much to drink Mick….”

 

To be continued/………………………


	22. Plans afoot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I apologise in advance for any errors in the text. I don't have a beta for this story so I've relied on my own checking and it may not be great!
> 
> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Rating: This chapter NC-17
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 22

*Jacqui Kostan, February 2014*

I pulled up outside of the small red brick house where Irene Anderson lived and turned off the engine, belatedly remembering to set the alarm before heading up the driveway. I felt better than I had in days, due in the most part, I’m sure, to Rachael’s impromptu visit earlier. I made a mental note to start looking after myself better, if not just for me, then for the sake of my daughter, who although only three and a half years old, had also lost one of the people she loved most, and needed her mother’s love and care more than ever.

I rang the doorbell, feeling bad that I’d left it so late. I should have been here to pick her up over an hour ago, and would have been if I hadn’t fallen asleep at the office.

Mrs Anderson answered the door cautiously, peering anxiously around the door until she realised it was me and slipped the chain off, drawing the door back fully to let me in. “Bethie – I’m so glad to see you, I was starting to get worried”. She pulled me into a quick hug as I entered the hallway.

“I got delayed at the office” I said, hugging her back and not elaborating. Although Irene knew practically everything there was to know about me, including what I was, I didn’t want to get a telling off for neglecting myself. Luckily she accepted my excuse without question.

“Evie’s asleep upstairs” she informed me, “I’ve given her something to eat and I’ve packed up all her bits and bobs ready to go”.

“Thanks, you’re a star Reni” I said, climbing quietly up the staircase hopeful of being able to carry her out to the car without waking her up.

As I inched open the door to her room a long, loud squeak from the hinges put paid to that plan.

“Mummy!” she yelled, instantly awake, teddy bear sent flying as she dropped out of bed and ran towards me, stumbling over her comfort blanket and lurching forward just as I deftly caught her in my arms and scooped her up, covering her small face with kisses.

“Hey V, how’s my little monster doing?” I said, hugging her to me and swinging her around until she squealed with delight.

“I did colouring today” she beamed.

“Ooo….what did you colour?” I smiled back, bending down to straighten up her bed covers and retrieve the abandoned bear.

“A big dog…” she paused, screwing her face up in concentration, “a flower….”, more face puckering, “a house…..”, her lips pouted as she tried to recall what else, “and……….. daddy’s car!”, she said finally, her face lighting up with happiness.

In contrast to her bright smile, my own face fell at the mention of ‘daddy’, and I quickly looked the other way, busying myself with fussing over the corner of the bedspread. “That’s nice…….you’ll have to show me the picture tomorrow.”

I carried her downstairs and she nestled her head into my shoulder, her eyes beginning to droop again already, as I collected her things up and made ready to leave. I thanked Irene profusely, apologising once again for my lateness and headed down the driveway toward the waiting car.

“Where’s daddy?” asked Evie, raising her head sleepily from my shoulder.

My stomach dropped, a sickening feeling lurching up out of nowhere, and I swallowed hard. She still hadn’t grasped that ‘daddy’ was no longer with us, and I was dreading the day when inevitably it would finally sink in. “We talked about this V….. daddy’s passed on to a better place. He’ll always be watching over you, but he just can’t be with us anymore.” My face stared to crease up even as I said it, and fresh tears pricked behind my eyes.

She screwed up her small face and shook her head. “No! Daddy’s going to wake up soon.” she stated. “When he’s done sleeping. Auntie Helena said so…”

I settled her down in the back of the car, silently cursing “Auntie” Helena. “It’s a kind of sleeping darling….” I told her “…just not the kind people wake up from.” I retrieved scruff bear from where he’d fallen in the footwell, settling him at her side as her eyes drifted shut, and planted a tender kiss on her forehead. “We’ll talk about it tomorrow V.”

The engine sprang into life with a loud throaty roar, and I glanced back at Evie to check she was OK, finding her already sleeping soundly, her mouth hanging half open in the abandon of sleep, before pulling out and heading home.

For the hundredth time I thought about what I should actually tell Evie about her origins. The plan had always been to tell her about her real father once she was old enough to understand, but recent events had changed things. In reality I actually had no idea what had happened to her biological father, or even whether he was dead or alive…

***********************

*Mick’s Loft, September 2008*

I awoke early Saturday morning feeling more than a little jaded from the previous evening. My wristwatch informed me it was still only just gone 6:00am, what would have been perfect for a nice long lie in cuddled up to Mick, had I not rolled over to find the other side of the bed empty. Mick had presumably retired to his freezer at some point during the night, understandable but disappointing nevertheless.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed, pulling on a pair of panties and borrowing Mick’s abandoned shirt from last night as a make do cover up, then padded off to the bathroom in search of some painkillers. Pills in hand I headed downstairs to the kitchen to fetch a glass of water, then started back to the bedroom to get dressed. On route I passed by the door to Mick’s freezer room, usually shut when he was ‘sleeping’, but today I noticed it was hanging slightly ajar. I paused just outside the door, not wanting to disturb him, but curious to see how he slept at night. 

After a moments deliberation I carefully pushed on the door, and slipped through the gap, my bare feet luckily making no sound as I approached the freezer. I could see the blurry shadow of his form behind the frosted glass of the long rectangular box, and wondered what it must be like to be forced to have to sleep like that. Of the many downsides to being a vampire, this certainly had to be one of the worst. Hesitantly, I closed the distance and leaned in to peer over the top at his sleeping form. The frosting on the glass made it impossible to see with any clarity so I leaned in closer until my face was nearly touching the surface, still to no avail. I had no intention of attempting to lift the lid. That was a step too far that even I wasn’t about risk. How was a person supposed to wake a sleeping vampire anyway? Knock on the side? I realised there was still a lot I had to learn about living as a vampire.

I was just beginning to move away, when a flash of movement from within caught my eye, and before I had time to react the lid erupted open, contacting painfully with the side of my head and knocking me backwards with enough force to send my flying into the wall at my rear. The impact knocked all the breath out of my lungs and sent the glass of water I was still holding flying with a crash. I just had time to register a very angry looking vampire, definitely not Mick, standing in full attack stance in front of me, as I slid slowly down the wall into a crumpled heap on the floor.

I knew I should be trying to run away, but nothing seemed to be working. My limbs felt like in a dream, when you desperately wanted them to move, but they just wouldn’t co-operate. Stars were literally floating in front of my eyes as I gazed in a daze at the figure before me.

Luckily the vampire, who was beginning to look quite familiar, didn’t appear to be moving either. Taking ragged breaths, he seemed to be making an attempt at collecting himself and was visibly trembling, engaged in what looked like a battle of willpower over his vampire side. For a few moments we simply stared at one another. Him taking deep breaths, fangs barred, and silver eyes boring into mine. Me like some kind of cornered prey, struggling to breathe at all and slumped unmoving against the wall.

As my vision started to clear I suddenly realised who I was looking at.

“Josef …..?” “Beth ..…?” we said in unison.

“My god, Mick is really going to kill me this time! I’m so sorry..” he apologised, eyes fading to warm brown as he took a step towards me, holding out a hand to help me up.

Reaching out my hand to take his proffered one, my eyes focused properly for the first time and it suddenly dawned on me that Josef was inches away from me wearing nothing but his birthday suit! And to make matters worse, from my half slumped position on the floor, my line of sight led straight to…

Before I could catch any more than a glimpse I hastily slapped the other hand over my eyes in horror. “Josef!” I exclaimed, hanging onto his hand as he pulled me up, and stumbling forward blindly. Then, stating the obvious, as if he might not have been aware, “You’re naked!”

He started to speak, but whatever he’d been about to say in reply was cut off abruptly as I yelled out in pain, realising too late that I’d just trodden barefoot on a piece of the broken glass.

“Ow! Ow! Ow!” I squealed pathetically, one hand grasping onto to Josef, the other now attempting to hold my injured foot, blind to boot as I squeezed my eyes firmly shut, desperately trying not to look at him.

“Beth, hang on, don’t move” Josef instructed, “there’s glass everywhere. I’m going to carry you out.” I felt his hand start to circle my waist as he prepared to lift me.

“Don’t you dare!” I yelled, standing on one foot with my eyes still screwed closed and attempting to brush his hand away. I had no intention of opening them again until he was either out of the room, or fully clothed. “Put some clothes on first!”

He duly removed his hand as instructed. “If the lady insists” he replied dryly, muttering loud enough for me to hear, “some people are such prudes…”. I heard him moving off and the rustling of cloth as he dressed. “No peeking” he added, and I shook my head in disbelief. It would have been funny it wasn’t so painful.

“What were you doing in Mick’s freezer anyway?” I asked, waiting on one leg like a flamingo, with a hand braced against the wall to steady myself.

“He called me about 3:00am this morning – you know…vampire stuff and all that.” I noticed he didn’t elaborate. “I’m sure he’ll fill you in on it all later.,,. Anyway, I was in need of some freezer time so he let me use his.”

“Talking of which..” he added curiously, “what were you doing looking in Mick’s freezer? I can tell you now, he doesn’t keep the Ben & Jerry’s chocolate chip in there..”

I hesitated briefly, momentarily caught out. “We were totally out of undead bodies in the downstairs freezer” I snarked back, avoiding the question.

As the rustling had stopped, I chanced partially opening one eye and was relieved to see he’d donned pants, shirt and shoes. “Really must speak to that boy about his choice of domestic appliances though…” he mused, tapping the freezer on his way past. “Not enough room to swing a cat in there.”

“I suppose you have the swan model with widescreen TV installed?” I replied sarcastically.

“You know me so well!” he smiled, crunching over broken glass as he stooped down ready to lift me up. With my left hand I hastily held down Mick’s shirt over my rear, hooking my right around Josef’s shoulder as he expertly lifted me up like I weighed no more than a doll, and carried me over the broken glass and out the door.

As we cleared Mick’s freezer room, I tapped my hand on his shoulder “You can put me down now.”

Glancing at me like I was an imbecile he ignored me and continued toward the stairs. “What are you going to do Beth? Hop all the way downstairs?” 

A suitably dignified response not springing to mind, I kept my mouth shut and allowed him to carry me down the stairs and across the floor to Mick’s lounge area, where he deposited me on the sofa and went off to search for first aid supplies.

Pulling my injured foot toward me I gingerly inspected the wound. A very sharp looking shard about an inch long was embedded in the sole just beneath the ball of my foot. Knowing that delaying the inevitable was just going to prolong the agony, I grasped it carefully between thumb and forefinger and yanked.

“Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow OW!” Dropping the offending piece of glass on the coffee table, I stamped the other foot on the floor and balled up my fists, releasing a string of obscenities as blood started to pour from the now open wound.

I tried to put my hand over it but blood was oozing around my fingers and starting to drip onto the floor by the time Josef arrived back with the first aid kit. Taking in the situation and dropping to his knees in front of me he grabbed the first bandage that came to hand and held it tightly against the cut. “Jesus Beth! What are you doing?!”

“I can’t help it!” I apologised, “I needed to get it out!”

Still holding my foot he raised himself up and was just about to sit down on the edge of the coffee table, when, seeing the piece of glass, sharp edge pointed upwards just below his descending rear, I pointed and yelled “don’t sit there!”

“What the blazers now!?” Executing a deft side swerve, he narrowly avoided the offending object and carefully retrieved it from the table, deposited it in a glass bowl before it could cause any more damage.

“This morning just keeps getting better.” He observed, shaking his head incredulously, then starting to look concerned as fresh blood started to drip through the still rolled up bandage pressed to the bottom of my foot.

Discarding the soaking bandage, he grabbed a second and holding it firmly against the bottom of my foot, attempted to raise it even higher in an effort to stem the bleeding.

Painfully aware I was flashing my underwear, I attempted to squirm lower into the sofa and hastily grabbed the throw, throwing it across my lap to hide my embarrassment. Meanwhile, Josef continued to hold my leg at forty five degrees, trying unsuccessfully to hide a smile at my obvious predicament.

“This is not the way I normally start the day…” I babbled, trying to make small talk as Josef checked the bandage, swapping it for a second time. “It’s normally coffee and a croissant…maybe a bit of egg and bacon…” Josef raised an eyebrow, “…hash browns and fried mushrooms… and a tomato sometimes…” I finished lamely, realising this was a daft thing to be telling someone who’d probably not eaten in over 400 years.

“It’s still bleeding” Josef informed me, ignoring my babble and removing the third blood soaked bandage. He stared thoughtfully at the wound for a few moments and seemed to come to a decision.

“I’m going to do something that might seem a bit strange” he stated matter of factly, “I’m not going to hurt you, so try not to struggle, and don’t worry if I vamp out briefly, it can’t be helped. I just need to stop this bleeding.”

Without stopping to explain, he lifted my foot and brought it to his mouth, proceeding to lick the cut with his tongue.

To say I was surprised was an understatement, but the logical part of my brain must have realised that if Josef had seriously wanted to drink my blood, this wouldn’t be the way a sane vampire would choose to go about it. So I just stared in amazement at the unusual spectacle taking place right in front of my eyes. Even when I heard a hiss, and realised he’d vamped out, I simply sat frozen to the spot as instructed, and squeezed my eyes shut, thinking that maybe if I couldn’t see it, it might not really be happening.

After what can only have been a few seconds (it felt like minutes) he obviously decided the cut had stopped bleeding and lowered my leg back to rest in his lap. I cautiously cracked open an eyelid.

“Mmmmm….. Chateau Neuf du Bethany Turner 2008” he quipped, smiling as he licked his lips and his features faded back to normal. “With a mild Stilton chaser…” he added with a wicked grin.

For once I could think of no adequate response, so I just stared at him aghast.

“It’s the coagulant in our saliva.” he stated by way of explanation.

“Oh…that’s good!” I replied, like we were talking about the weather.

He proceeded to clean up my foot with alcohol wipes he found in the first aid box, and applied a thick wad of lint to the tender spot under the arch, before expertly bandaging it up and placing it gently on the floor.

“But I wanted a Disney bandaid..” I pouted, flashing him a grateful smile now that it was all over.

He gave me a half serious admonishing look, “Pluto just licked your foot better kid, don’t be ungrateful.”

We were both still laughing as the door opened and Mick walked in.

*********************

Glancing from me to Josef, taking in my state of undress, bandaged foot, and our still blood-covered hands, Mick’s face displayed a mixture of confusion, concern and anger.

“Are you okay Beth?” he asked, frowning as he caught sight of the rolled up bandages soaked with blood, and the blood spots on the floor.

“I think I’ll have a sore foot for a while, but apart from that, fine.” I replied.

“What happened?” he threw a slightly accusatory glance in Josef’s direction.

Josef raised still blood covered hands as if in surrender, “Innocent of all charges M’Lord. I accidentally surprised your girlfriend, she dropped her glass, stepped on it, and voila!” he gestured toward my bandaged foot, “the scene you see before you.”

Mick narrowed his eyes suspiciously, obviously not buying Josef’s explanation as the whole truth.

“Did I miss out the part where I was naked and drank Beth’s blood?” Josef looked thoughtful as though trying to remember, “although technically not at the same time….” he added with an innocent smile.

“Oh…and I might have thrown her into the wall and nearly knocked her out too…” he raised a finger to his chin, considering, “Yep. I think that about covers it.”

Flabbergasted I looked in Mick’s direction, but to my amazement he was smiling. “I cannot leave you two alone for five minutes can I?” he said, shaking his head. “Come on,” he put an arm around me and helped me off the sofa, “let’s get you cleaned up.”

We headed off upstairs to the bathroom, while Josef washed up in the kitchen. On the way, I confessed the reason for my freezer visit and Mick apologised for not having thought to leave me a note.

“So what was the urgent business that needed attending to at 3:00am?” I asked, turning on the faucet and starting to rinse the blood from my hands.

Perching on the edge of the bath, he looked uneasy at my question. “Umm… we were discussing a plan of action in response to the threats.” He replied somewhat evasively.

My eyebrows shot up at that. “So there’s a plan?” I asked, sensing his unease at my questioning.

“Um… yeah…” he paused, looking up, and our eyes met in the mirror. His face alone told me I wasn’t going to like the plan, but I could see by the resigned look on his face that he was going to go along with it. “We still have to work out the details, but yes, there’s a plan” he sighed.

My hands stilled in what they were doing and I just instantly knew that somehow this plan wasn’t going to be good news.

I turned off the faucet and grabbed a towel, hobbling over to join him on the edge of the bath, where he was sitting with his head in his hands.

“What aren’t you telling me Mick?”

He ran his fingers through his hair and finally turned to look at me, a pained expression on his face.

“I’m going to France” he stated.

It took about a second, then the penny suddenly dropped.

“Coraline.” I said, knowing I was right even as I said it.

My expression must have said it all as Mick looked like he’d rather be anywhere else than under my intent gaze.

“You’re going to France because of Coraline?” I repeated, hoping against hope that I might have got it wrong.

Mick turned to face me, taking hold of my hands and holding them tightly in his. “Beth, if this ‘Hemera’ is for real and they’re the one who sent that list, none of us are going to be safe, even if we can manage to relocate. Coraline knows the location of the remainder of the cure, and she’s convinced that with our help, she can get it out of France and back here where it can help all of us if we need it.”

I was shaking my head, knowing that what he was saying made sense on one level, but my instincts where suddenly firing on all cylinders, questions were whirling in my head. How had Coraline gotten involved in all this? Had she and Mick been in contact all that time? And, most importantly of all, what were Coraline’s motives for wanting to help?

I looked at Mick in disbelief, anger beginning to rise that he just couldn’t seem to see it.

“This is the woman who turned you against your will Mick, made you feel like you were a monster,” I paused thinking of the young girl he’d tried to turn, and how hard it had been for him to confess to me. “She KIDNAPPED me! With the intention of turning me into the same! You CANNOT trust her!” I practically shouted the last, snatching my hands from his grasp and stumbling to my feet.

“Beth…” he began, but I cut him off before he could get any further.

“Why does it have to be you?” I was practically spitting now, and I knew I was over-reacting, but I just couldn’t seem to help myself.

“Why can’t someone else go Mick?”

For a second we just stared at each other, Mick’s face resigned, mine angry and demanding answers.

“I volunteered Beth” he said, his expression sombre but determined, and I knew without a doubt that there would be no changing his mind.

I whirled, slapping my hand against the wall in frustration. Tears started to prickle behind my eyes, threatening to spill over, but I didn’t want Mick to see them so I took a few moments to calm myself before turning back to face him.

For a long moment we just looked at each other, then quite suddenly all the fight seemed to go out of me and I moved back over to take a seat next to him, placing my hand over his where it curled over the lip of the bath. “Oh Mick”, I sighed, shaking my head, but this time in realisation that this was just something Mick had to do, “why do you always have to do the right thing?”

His hand moved to entwine his fingers with mine, and he lifted my hand to his lips, bestowing a soft kiss against my skin. “Just stupid I guess,” he smiled wistfully.

“When do you go?” I asked, half expecting him to be setting off immediately.

“Not for a day at least. Flights have to be booked and provisions made for the duration. I can’t exactly pack a suitcase of bagged blood”, he smiled, “luckily Josef seems to have a network of freshies on hand, so I’ll most likely be taking a couple of his ‘packed lunches’ with me.”

“You could take me” I offered hopefully.

He shook his head, “Beth there’s no way I’d put you in danger like that.”

“But what about the freshies you’d be taking? Wouldn’t they be in danger? What’s the difference?”

“They won’t be going anywhere dangerous Beth, they’ll be there for one purpose only. Plane taxi, hotel, then back with us on the return trip. You, on the other hand”, his eyes softened as he gave me a knowing look, “there’s no way you’d agree to stay in the car. I know you too well.”

“Who’s the ‘us’?” I asked, picking up on what Mick had just said. “Is Josef going with you?”

“No, he’s not going. We need someone here to handle things this end if necessary. It’ll probably be me and two of the cleaners as back up, and” he sighed, “ just in case we need a clean up team.” He looked me in the eye, taking both my hands in his in an attempt to re-assure me, but somehow not quite managing to look like he believed what he was about to say. “But I’m sure we won’t.” 

I gave him a stern look. “You had better come back safe and sound Mick St. John, or you’ll have me to answer to!”

He smiled, his eyes crinkling up at the corners and hair flopping over his forehead, and my heart just melted. “I’ll do my best” he promised.

“What am I going to do with you?” I asked, only half jokingly, wishing that for once my white knight would stop charging off to everyone else’s aid.

He lifted a finger to my cheek and trailed a soft line down to my jawbone, his smile widening as I nuzzled into his touch, enjoying the physical contact.

“I can think of something…” he suggested, a wicked grin spreading across his face.

“Hmmmm…..,” I said, moving closer and taking hold of his shirt collar, pulling him towards me. “What might that be?”

Our foreheads touched, warm skin to cool as we rested against each other. We were so close I could feel his breath whispering over my skin, strangely cool, but also now familiar to me in its peculiarity. For a few seconds, there was just our breathing, as our lips hovered mere centimetres apart, neither of us moving, inhaling each other’s air and enjoying the heightened sensation our close proximity presented. Anticipating the kiss that must surely come at any moment, my eyes closed of their own volition, and an involuntary sigh escaped my lips as I felt Mick begin to close the distance. 

“A.. hem!” The sudden interjection came from the doorway, and we sprang apart like teenagers caught making out on the sofa.

Josef wrinkled his face in mock disgust. “Why do I suddenly feel like your father?” he asked Mick, checking out his reflection in the mirror and straightening his tie. “I really do not look old enough!”

Mick looked half embarrassed and half amused. If it hadn’t been for the fact that he was a vampire, I’m sure he would have been blushing to the roots of his hair. “Well you actually are kind of like my ‘dad’ now – technically” he said.

Josef shot him a withering look. “Don’t call me dad”, he snapped with an air of bristling annoyance, earning a wide grin from Mick.

Ignoring Mick’s obvious amusement Josef moved rapidly on. “I hate to interrupt your ‘cleaning up’ but I’m heading home and I need a quick word with Mick before I go.” He glanced at me, raising a questioning eyebrow in request. “With the young lady’s permission?”

“Anything for my boyfriend’s ‘dad’” I smiled, enjoying the irked expression on Josef’s face as he made his exit from the bathroom, before getting up and hobbling back to the sink to finish my ablutions.

Mick and I exchanged at conspiratorial look in the mirror, identical wide grins plastered over our faces.

“I hope he’s not going to give me the birds and bees talk..” whispered Mick as he followed Josef out the door.

I smiled. “Bit late for that” I said, earning a wink from Mick as he closed the door on his way out.

Finally alone in the bathroom I rested my hands on the sink and peered at my face in the mirror. The face looking back at me looked much like the one I’d seen yesterday, except that now there was a slightly sad touch to the expression. It was barely 6:30am in the morning and already I’d been thrown into a wall, injured myself, been tended by a vampire nurse, and now the love of my life was about to depart the country to meet up with his ex, or maybe now not so ex, wife.

If he didn’t go, then in all likelihood we’d be having to re-locate, that was if ‘Hemera’ didn’t get to us first. On the other hand, if he went ahead with the plan, there was a high possibility he might get killed in the attempt. I was in no doubt that if Coraline feared these vampires, then they must indeed be formidable foes. Did Mick realise what he was getting himself into?

I sighed, blowing lout a long breath, trying to convince myself that maybe things weren’t as bad as they seemed. I’d been so happy yesterday when Mick finally admitted he’d turn me if I wanted. Now I was starting to have second thoughts about that as well. He’d been pretty drunk on my second hand alcohol when he’d made the offer. Would he still feel the same with a clear head?

I shook myself. Thinking like this was getting me nowhere. I had to trust him, and, more importantly, I had to trust in him. If anyone could do this, then Mick St. John was the one. He’d come through for me on every occasion up to now, and if there ever was such a thing as a guardian angel, then he was most definitely it.

“Pull yourself together Beth,” I whispered to my reflection, “and be the woman he deserves.” 

With that I finished washing up, cleaned my teeth and brushed my hair, then headed back to the bedroom to get dressed.

I bumped into Mick at the top of the stairs. “Plans all sorted?” I asked.

“Josef’s going to make the arrangements and let me know timings. I should be leaving in the morning.” 

“Oh…” I said glumly.

He pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arms tightly around me and planting a kiss on the top of my head. “We still have a whole day,” he said, drawing back slightly and planting a second kiss on my forehead.

“What do you want to do?” I asked, smiling broadly, determined to enjoy the rest of the day.

“Well..,” he murmured against my hair, his hands rubbing lazy circles up and down my back, “I thought maybe we could…” his mouth moved to drop butterfly kisses across my face, halting as he came to my lips, “…I thought we might….”.

“Work maybe? Make preparations for your trip?” I queried playfully, willing his lips to continue on their journey.

He hovered over my mouth looking thoughtful, “…could do?...” he furrowed his brows. “I do need to pack…”, he considered, and for a few heart pounding moments I began to think he wasn’t joking. “But hey…” he grinned “I’m a man…… how long can it take me?”

I was smiling broadly as his lips finally met mine, a sudden bolt of desire surprising me as his tongue parted my lips and his arms pulled me more tightly against him.

With each touch of his tongue to mine, another flame seemed to ignite and flare inside me and all thoughts of depressing vampire business vanished from my mind as I melted into his arms. A passion that shocked me with its intensity was growing ever more urgent with each passing second.

My arms were around his back, travelling up and down his spine. Somehow I’d managed to slip my hands under his shirt, hungry for the intimate contact.

Breaking contact momentarily to get some air, we grinned at each other as we both panted for breath. It briefly crossed my mind to wonder why a vampire would need to pant, but before I could think about it too deeply, Mick moved in and began raining kisses along my shoulder bone and up along my neck. I closed my eyes, throwing back my head ecstatically as he worked his way around to the other side and back up again to my eagerly awaiting mouth.

Still kissing, he started walking us backwards towards his bedroom, our mouths locked together as we stumbled through the door and somehow made it to the bed. As the backs of my knees made contact with the edge of the bed I toppled backwards onto the coverlet, landing softly amongst the still ruffled up duvet and pillows. Mick followed me so that we both ended up sprawled ungracefully, oblivious to everything as we fed at each other’s mouths, our only thought the heat of the moment.

Mick was struggling to remove his jacket while my fingers deftly unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it roughly from his jeans. He broke off our kiss momentarily to disentangle his arms from the sleeves that seemed intent on trapping his arms behind his back, and I smiled up at him, admiring the way the muscles rippled under his skin as he worked to free himself.

Finally escaping the offending garment, he positioned himself above me with his arms to either side and smiled down at me with an expression scarily akin to a hungry wolf. 

At the look on his face, a half grunt, half moan escaped my lips in response, and he grinned broadly, slowly lowering his face to mine, and, in contrast to our earlier frenzy, bestowing the lightest, gentlest of kisses. He drew back slightly, and for long seconds we just stared into each other’s eyes, the only sound our laboured breathing as our chests rose and fell in unison.

“I love you Beth Turner….” he smiled.

I smiled mischievously. “I quite like you too Mick St. John.”

He frowned and looked at me questioningly. “ ‘Quite like’ ?”

I gave him an impish look back.

“Am I going to have to tickle you again?” he threatened, moving his weight to one side, pushing my shirt up and spreading his fingers across my bare stomach.

At the touch of his hand another bolt of longing stabbed through me, and without warning I let out a sigh of pleasure, desperate for him to touch me some more.

“Okay! Love!” I squealed, giving in as he began to wiggle his fingers up my side. “I love you!”

“That’s more like it..” he smiled, his hand changing direction as he ran the flat of his palm back across my stomach and slipped his fingertips under the lace edging of my panties. He teased back and forth, enjoying the little gasps of pleasure I seemed incapable of holding back and I reached out for his shirt, intent of relieving him of some clothes, since I was already half naked, and began to tug it over his shoulders.

We both sat up as I shrugged the shirt down his arms and pulled. It snagged at his wrists and I paused, a handful of cloth in one hand as I leant over Mick’s shoulder struggling to undo the buttons with the other. Mick took the opportunity to start kissing wherever he could reach, dropping small butterfly kisses across my chest and neck. Frustrated, I gave up on the cuffs, buttons popping as I yanked them over his hands and threw the shirt on the bed.

Mouths once more glued together we fell back on the duvet on our sides, and our hands began to explore each other’s bodies. Mick’s fingers traced along the skin under my shirt and I took in a sharp intake of breath as he began tracing slow circles around my breasts, setting my skin tingling in the wake as he worked in ever decreasing circles. I ran my hand along his side to the top of his jeans, then tentatively down to lightly stroke my fingers over the hardness straining against the zipper. A small moan escaped his lips at my touch and his hand tightened around my breast, his thumb brushing across my nipple to send what felt like a bolt of electricity straight down between my legs.

It was my turn to let out a cry, and, inspired into action, I grasped Mick’s belt buckle and made short work of undoing his jeans. Mick’s hand had moved down and was now edging under my panties, slowly moving down until his fingers found their goal. I gasped out loud as he slipped a finger into the wetness at my centre, and moved up to begin tracing slow circles over my sweet spot. 

“Oh my God…. Mick….” I writhed under his touch, almost unbearable in its intensity.

Aching to have him inside me I placed my hand over the swelling in his underwear and stroked him lightly through the material feeling him jerk in response as he leaned in and started to kiss me harder. I slipped my hand beneath the waistband and curled my fingers around his erection, beginning to move them slowly up and down.

“Beth…” he groaned, breaking off our kiss, and sitting up once more to make quick work of removing boots, jeans and underwear, before turning his attention to me and whipping my shirt over my head in one deft movement. “It’ll be over before it’s started if you keep that up”, he smiled.

“I feel the same Mick” I admitted. “I don’t know why you do to me but I feel just about ready to explode.”

Mick just smiled in response and pushed me gently back down.

“Then let’s explode together….” he said, waggling his eyebrows mock suggestively.

I burst out laughing at that and he looked slightly disconcerted.

“That was an unbelievably cheesy thing to say wasn’t it?” he decided, shaking his head with an amused smile.

“Stop talking and start kissing.” I instructed him, lifting my hips slightly off the cover, and in one brief movement, pulling my panties down and over my feet, aiming them somewhere in the direction of the floor.

He didn’t need asking twice. The first kiss was a soft one placed just above my belly button, the second third and fourth moved steadily downwards in a direct line until, realising his intended destination, I sat up, drawing Mick with me and leaning in to kiss him on the mouth.

He cocked a quizzical eyebrow at me. “Don’t you want….?”

In reply I simply rolled him onto his back and straddled him, closing my eyes and rocking against him, wordlessly telling him what I wanted. The expression on his face when I opened my eyes nearly took my breath away and I leaned down to kiss him, none too gently, firmly parting his lips with my tongue and immediately feeling his mouth give way beneath mine as he returned the kiss fiercely.

His arms came around to encircle me, and abruptly he switched our positions. Breaking off the kiss, he lifted his hips and I manoeuvred into position as he took hold of his erection and placed himself against the wet folds between my legs. For a second we just stared at each other, and for the umpteenth time I marvelled at the beauty of those remarkable slate grey eyes with tiny gold and green flecks, currently boring into mine like he was looking straight into my soul. Then with a slight push, he was suddenly filling me up and the beginnings of my orgasm were already starting to radiate from my centre as he began to move inside me.

I wrapped my legs around Mick’s waist, changing the angle slightly and letting out a low moan as I felt him go deeper inside. 

“I think I’m going to come!” I blurted out, closing my eyes, unable to hold back the waves of ecstasy starting to rise up, roll and crash over in quick succession. As Mick continued to move inside me the waves seemed to come on endlessly and I clutched at Mick’s shoulders almost desperately, until at last they began to subside.

When at last I opened my eyes, Mick’s silver ones were staring back at me. His rapid movements began to still and I turned my head to the side anticipating that his orgasm, and consequently the need to bite, were imminent.

“Beth….oh God….” He uttered. I saw his mouth open, fangs barred in readiness, and again there was that tiny moment of fear mixed with the anticipation of the pleasure that would follow, knowing that at any second those fangs would be piercing my flesh.

I shut my eyes and held my breath, but the bite never came. As I felt him start to pulse inside me I turned my head to see him biting down on his own arm. Folding my arms around him, I watched for several seconds as he swallowed down his own blood, riding out his climax.

Finally spent, he let go his arm and collapsed on top of me, his head nestled into the crook of my neck breathing heavily. For a while we just lay there, entwined, one of my hands resting in Mick’s hair, the other tenderly stroking up and down his back as our breathing gradually subsided.

After a little while, Mick’s muffled voice came from against the duvet. “I like you quite a lot Beth Turner”.

I smiled and hugged him tight. “You’re not so bad yourself Mick St. John.”

When he raised his head his face was back to normal save for a smear of blood at the corner of his mouth. I made a little ‘wipey’ gesture to indicate he had something there and he quickly licked his finger, dabbing at the spot.

“It’s gone” I informed him.

He rolled off any lay on his back next to me, a broad smile plastered over his face.

“Why are you so smiley?” I asked, rolling onto my side and snuggling up to him.

“Just happy…”

“Me too…”

For a while we lay together enjoying the contact and the afterglow. Then the curious cat in me started thinking, and I couldn’t resist asking some questions.

“So…” I said, propping myself up on one elbow, “why the arm?”

He glanced at me, then down at my leg. “Your foot.” he replied.

“My foot?” I repeated stupidly.

“You lost a lot of blood this morning. I could hardly go drinking more now could I?”

I glanced down at my still bandaged foot and realised I’d forgotten all about it. Even now that I’d remembered it didn’t seem to hurt. Maybe vampire saliva was an anaesthetic as well as a coagulant?

“Ah…okay, that makes sense. Thank you for being so thoughtful.” I thanked him.

“My pleasure.” He responded with a grin. “Literally.”

My ears pricked up at that one. “So you actually get pleasure from biting yourself?”

“Well apparently…. I don’t exactly make a habit of it, but yeah…. I definitely got something extra there. I think?....” he sounded a bit unsure. “I had to bite something and my arm was the only thing that sprang to mind at the time.” He held his arm up to inspect it, but apart from dried blood on the surface of his skin, the wound had completely healed.

“On the same subject,” I carried on, thinking of Josef’s comment earlier, “is vampire saliva a coagulant?”

Frowning, Mick shot me a questioning look. “What makes you ask?” 

Realising I should have told Mick earlier, I explained about Josef licking the cut to stop it bleeding.

Mick’s frown deepened, but he answered my question. “Yes. It’s what stops humans from bleeding to death after a bite, especially somewhere extra vulnerable like the neck. Licking the bite isn’t just a way of cleaning up spilled blood, it also serves to heal the wound.” He looked at me seriously, “I think for once Josef may actually have acted out of a genuine desire to help. He knows I’d kill him if he drank your blood for any other reason.”

“Oh…..well that’s all right then….?” I was quite surprised at the vehemence in Mick’s tone as he’d stated the last.

I was quiet for a few moments after that, my brain taking time to process what Mick had said. I was just about to ask another question when Mick turned to me and surprised me by putting his finger over my lips with a small smile.

“How did you know…….” I splurted, managing to get my question out despite his blocking finger. He pushed harder and the last part came out as an indignant burble, “……I was going to ask a question?”

He laughed out loud. “You just can’t help yourself can you? I can read you like a book!”

“Am I that bad?” I said, belatedly realising that was another question.

“You’re that bad.” He stated with certainty, laying back and folding his arms under his head.

Five minutes of silence later I thought I would burst with all the questions I was doing my damnedest not to ask.

I only had to flick my eyes toward Mick and he instantly turned to look at me with a long-suffering expression on his face.

“Go on then, I can see you’re about to explode.” He smiled.

I looked back at him, knowing exactly what question I wanted to ask, but slightly unsure it was a good idea. Deciding that I didn’t ever want to be scared about asking something, I plunged ahead.

“Before this whole list thing started, were you and Coraline in touch after she was taken back to France?”

He took a deep breath, a pained expression on his face as he gazed up at the ceiling, obviously not wanting to answer.

I waited patiently, and finally, resigned, he turned to face me.

“Yes.” He paused, as though deciding whether to elaborate, then continued. “She contacted me about two weeks after Lance took her back. She asked me if I’d take care of her apartment for her, make sure her things were safe. Generally look after things until such time as she could get back.” He sighed, “I agreed. I felt I owed it to her after she sacrificed her freedom for my safety.”

“Since then she’s e-mailed me a couple of times. Strictly business”, he added, catching sight of my face, “just stuff concerning her affairs. Things she couldn’t do herself from out of the country.” He looked me in the eye. “That’s it.”

“Until she came up with the idea of stealing the cure?” I prompted.

“Yes, until then.” He looked uneasy.

“How did she know about everything?” I was starting to feel like a Spanish Inquisitor.

“Logan sent out coded e-mails when we thought Emma Monaghan might expose us.” He shrugged, “ The rest she found out about through the vampire grapevine. News travels fast.”

“Do you trust her?” I knew I was pushing it, but I had to know.

“Not a far as I could throw her.” He looked unhappy. “But I have to give her the benefit of the doubt for all our sakes.”

“Okay.” I nodded, indicating that I accepted Mick’s reasons, and he picked up my hand, brushing a soft kiss on the back of it and enfolding it between his own.

“Final question…...”

“You have to be kidding!” he interjected, rolling his eyes, but he squeezed my hand and nodded for me to carry on. 

“Did you mean it last night when you said you’d turn me if I wanted it?” I looked at him for a long moment. “Or was that just the alcohol speaking?”

His face softened and he reached out one hand to stroke my hair, the other holding onto to mine tightly.

“I meant what I said Beth.” I’d never seen him look so serious. “The decision’s yours to make, but it you want it, I’m willing to do it.”

I smiled. “I’m not ready yet..” then surprising even myself, “but I think one day I will be.”

His answering smile made my heart swell with love for him.

I grinned back. “Interrogation over.” 

 

To be continued/………………………

All reviews much appreciated.


	23. The Waiting Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I finally decided it was time to post chapter 23. It's not quite what I had intended but if I'd carried on the chapter would have been far too long, so the rest will be saved for chapter 24.
> 
> Apologies once again in advance for any errors due to this story having no beta. I hope you enjoy, and please do review. It helps so much to know someone is reading.
> 
> Galaxy 
> 
> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Rating: This chapter 
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 23

*Jacqui Kostan, February 2014*

Watching Evie sleeping soundly, arms stretched out at her sides in total abandon, I marvel for the millionth time at what a miracle she truly is. By rights I should never have been able to have her, and I was eternally grateful that I’d been lucky enough to flout the laws of nature and defy the barren existence that should have been my destiny. She’d saved me in so many ways since my turning, giving me the strength to carry on, when, had it just been me, I might had given up on life. Now, once again, I had a reason to keep going when all I really wanted to do was curl up in a corner and die.

Having lost so many people from my life made me terrified of losing another. Without Evie I just didn’t think I’d be able to carry on. Protecting her had to be the number one priority from now on, as I was not about to lose anyone else.

I thought back to my childhood when Coraline had abducted me, and wondered how my mother had ever survived that nightmare experience. Mick St. John had been her savior too, and for the first time I felt a true sense of empathy with my mother for what she must have gone through back then. Although I’d not seen my parents in over 6 years, I’d kept tabs on them, much the same way Mick had followed my life after he’d saved me, and I wished wholeheartedly there was some way I could see them again.

Becoming a vampire definitely had its downsides, and I wondered at how naïve I’d been to think it was a choice I could willing make, even in exchange for an eternity with the man I loved. Would I have changed my mind if I’d properly had time to think it through? Maybe…

In the end though, the decision had been taken out of my hands. I’d had a very romantic vision of how a “turning” would be. Me, calm and willing, held ever so gently in Mick’s loving arms, while he, possibly slightly doubtful, but nevertheless willing to go through with what he had promised, gently bit down on my neck to give me the love bite of all time.

The reality couldn’t have been further from the truth…

 

*Mick’s loft, 2008*

Our final day before Mick’s departure had largely been spent in bed, although not a lot of sleeping had been taking place. Finally we’d decided to get up and Mick had grabbed a few vital hours of freezer time while I went back to my apartment to pack a case with a week’s worth of clothes and toiletries. I wasn’t going to be accompanying him to France, although I had tried to persuade him again several times, before finally giving up and accepting that Mick would be much more able to get on with the job at hand without having the extra worry of having to look out for me as well.

It had been decided that I’d be safer staying at Mick’s than my own apartment, what with all the additional security he had. We still didn’t know how much of a threat this ‘Hemera’ might pose, so my personal vampire security guard would continue to keep a watch over me for the duration of Mick’s mission, which, all going to plan, Mick hoped would be no longer than a few days to a week at most. I was more than happy with this arrangement, as, much as I loved my apartment, being at Mick’s place gave me a real feeling of being a proper couple for the first time. Mick had expressly forbidden me riffle through his filing cabinets in his absence, but he knew me well enough by now to know that that wouldn’t stop me, and I felt joy in the knowledge that he would trust me to share in his private things.

My foot was still tender from the cut, and the bandage made walking in heels almost impossible, so having hobbled to my car and realised that there was no way I was going to be able to drive, I gave up and hailed a taxi. Glancing in the rear view mirror as I climbed into the cab, I saw a black coated figure stub out a cigarette and climb into a vehicle parked on the other side of the road. I wondered if this was the vampire assigned to tail me or just some random person. I don't know what freaked me out more, that my life might be in danger, or that someone was following my every move.

Arriving at my apartment, I limped inside and immediately kicked off my shoes, cursing myself for the curiosity which had ended up getting me injured. I just hoped it would be healed in time for Simone's party - I definitely did not want to be wearing flats with my gorgeous new dress. I grabbed a couple of pairs of low heeled shoes for work and threw them into a suitcase along with a week's supply of clothes for the office. The dress I'd purchased for the party was hanging in the wardrobe, and I took it out, holding it up against me and admiring myself in the mirror one more time before folding it neatly on top. Ever the optimist, I carefully packed the matching sandals and chose some bits and pieces of jewellery to set off the ensemble. Assorted pyjamas, slippers, loungewear, underwear, toiletries and a couple of romantic novels later, and I was just about set to go.

Changing into a pair of jeans and a shirt, I chose a comfortable pair of trainers and loosely laced them up around my bandaged foot before calling for another taxi.

Mindful of the distinct lack of food in Mick's cupboards, I stopped by the convenience store to pick up some groceries on my way back, somehow managing to stagger out with four bags full of supplies which probably would have lasted me a fortnight.

“Are you preparing for a siege?” asked Mick, opening the door and taking two of the bags from me before I buckled under the weight.

I grinned, somewhat guiltily, “ ‘Always be prepared’ they teach you in the girl guides. Wait till you see my suitcase….”

Having retrieved my suitcase from where the cab driver had left it in the lobby, Mick wrestled it into his apartment and eyed the enormous bag warily. “Did you pack the kitchen sink too? I only have the one wardrobe…”

“A girl has to have her things Mick, we’re not like you boys you know, able to get through the week on one pair of underwear…” I teased.

“I’ll have you know this boy’s underwear gets changed on a very regular basis!” he countered, looking slightly offended.

“Well let’s hope you’re not gone longer than a week then or you’ll have to start recycling” I glanced gloomily at Mick’s own small case, packed and ready for the morning.

“I’ll be back before you know it Beth”. He dumped the grocery bags on the counter top and came over to wrap me in a bear hug. “Besides, I can’t let you go to Simone’s party on your own can I?”

He drew back to look at me, and I obviously didn’t do a very good job of hiding the worry I felt, as he wrapped his arms around me once more and hugged me even tighter. “It’s going to be okay Beth…”

“I hope so..” I sighed against his shirt.

 

Josef stopped by later in the day to drop off the plane and hotel tickets and filled Mick in on the arrangements he’d made for his freshies. One of them would be travelling on the plane with Mick, just in case he needed to feed before reaching the hotel. The others would travel separately and join him there. Josef had booked the entire top floor of one of the best hotels in Paris, which sported a heated roof top swimming pool and spa facilities for his freshies, and a specially installed industrial freezer for Mick.

“Not that I don’t appreciate it Josef, but this isn’t exactly a holiday” Mick complained.

“It’s not for your benefit my friend. I’m not sending my freshies on a mission without a little bit of compensation..” Josef gave his friend a knowing look and lowered his voice conspiratorially, “..but the ice room is definitely worth a visit, and Chloe gives a great massage..”

Mick grinned then caught my eye and quickly wiped the smile off his face, replacing it with a look of righteous good boyfriendness. “I don’t think I’ll be needing to use any of those kind of services thanks Josef.”

Arms crossed in front of my chest I glared at Josef, and he had the decency to look slightly apologetic, or as apologetic as it’s possible to look whilst still smirking, as he muttered “Sorry Beth….”

I turned my stare to Mick and he visibly squirmed under my gaze.

“What? I didn’t do anything!” he defended himself. “It was him!” he pointed in Josef’s direction, throwing him an accusing look.

“Oh my, look at the time!” Josef made a point of looking at his watch. “I really must go.” He started to head towards the door, still snickering.

“Josef!” Mick’s shout stopped Josef in his tracks, and he turned back to face us.

“Look out for Beth while I’m gone..” Mick’s tone was sombre, and I could almost hear the unspoken “or else” as he fixed Josef with a meaningful look.

All traces of humour were instantly wiped from Josef’s face as he looked in earnest at his friend.

“Always Mick. Always..”

There was a pause where we all looked at one another very seriously for a moment and no one said anything. Then the pause reached that disconcerting stage when you know you need to say something but just can’t think of any words.

Mick started to shuffle. I uncrossed my arms and crossed them again.

Finally Josef’s face broke into a smile.

“I do ‘awkward’ so well!”

“You do.” Mick and I both chorused in unison.

 

For our last evening together we decided to do dinner on the roof. It was the next best thing to going ‘out’ for dinner, and somewhere where Mick’s not partaking of any food would not cause any suspicion. 

Mick was sprawled out on the tartan blanket with a glass of scotch, watching appreciatively as I tucked into Thai green curry and fragrant jasmine rice.

“Don’t tell me you used to cook this back in your days as a cook?” I wondered at the choice of tonight’s cuisine.

“No, but the chef at the Thai restaurant around the block has been doing it for quite some time I hear” he grinned.

I gesticulated at him with my fork. “Ah! So that’s what you were doing while I was in the shower. Ordering in take out! And all the while I thought you’d been slaving over a hot stove.”

“And to think you used to work as an investigative reporter..” he teased. “Didn’t you notice the foil tray clues in the garbage bin, and the lack of washing up? Not to mention the take out menu on the counter…”

“Well he or she, whoever it was, is a very good cook. This is delicious.” I put down my cleared plate on the blanket and poured myself a large glass of red wine, moving to stretch out on the blanket beside Mick.

It was a clear night and the moon was nearly full, a fact which I pointed out to Mick.

“Maybe it’s a good job you’re going away for a few days. Wouldn’t want you to be around when the fur starts to sprout…”

“You are so not a werewolf you idiot” he laughed, “but I bet you’d make a really cute one.”

“Werewolf? What are you talking about?” I teased. “I meant I just realized I forgot to pack my razor…”

“You fool..” he laughed, grabbing me around the waist and rolling me over onto my back on the blanket. I looked up at him smiling down at me and wondered if I’d ever felt so happy. If it wasn’t for the fact that Mick was going away on a dangerous mission the very next day, it might have been a perfect moment.

Before I could start to think too deeply about tomorrow, Mick’s lips descended onto mine and I wasn’t thinking about anything except how amazing it felt, and how much I wanted him.

Completely lost in our kiss, our bodies pressed tightly together, I totally forgot where we were for a moment and slipped my hands beneath his shirt, running them over his muscled back, hungry for the feel of his bare skin next to mine.

I don’t know how long we continued like that, like a pair of teenagers on a first date, but suddenly I was aware of his groin, rock hard, pressing into me, and in response, delicious butterflies beginning to flutter low in my belly.

Fortunately I could also feel the hard concrete beneath the blanket we were lying on, and before we could get too carried away, I came back to my senses, and reluctantly broke off our kiss.

Mick was breathing heavily when he finally raised his head, and his eyes were glazed as he looked into mine. “I think we’d better go inside” he suggested, adjusting his trousers.

“I think we had..” I agreed, somewhat breathlessly.

In deference to my injured foot, Mick scooped me up in his arms and carried me across the roof. I couldn’t help but think that this was a much nicer way to leave than the last time we’d been up here…

 

The following morning we were both up bright and early. I tucked into a breakfast of croissants and coffee, while Mick gave himself a final injection of bagged blood.

“Don’t get too used to feeding fresh while you’re away” I warned. “I don’t think I could get used to having freshies about the place.”

“It’s just for the duration Beth. I’m not about to turn into Josef.” 

“You’d better not” I only half joked. In truth I didn’t like the idea of Mick feeding from another woman. I remembered the look on Simone’s face when I’d walked in on the three of them a few weeks ago, and somehow the thought of how sexual it had looked would not get out of my head.

The buzzer went and Mick told the taxi driver he’d be down shortly. Shrugging on his jacket he walked over to take my hands in his.

“It’s going to be okay Beth. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“I know,” I tried my best to look convinced, “just be very careful around Coraline. I know I’m biased, what with the kidnapping and all, but …..” I couldn’t quite seem to finish the sentence.

What I wanted to say was that Mick’s common sense seemed to go out of the window when it came to Coraline. I wasn’t convinced that he didn’t still have some degree of feelings for her, and I knew she definitely did for him. What I wanted to say was “don’t trust her, and please don’t fall in love with her again”. What I actually said was

“…just be careful Mick.”

“I will,” he promised.

I stood on tiptoe and reached up to place a soft kiss on his lips, which he returned with a gentle pressure of his own.

“See you soon Beth.” 

“Love you Mick.”

He grinned, opening the door and wheeling his case out. “You too.”

“Oh..” he turned, groping in his pocket for something, and handed me the take out menu from last night. “Just in case you don’t feel like cooking.”

I laughed, shaking my head. “Thanks!”

The door closed and I leaned back on it thinking this was going to be a long, long week.

Looking at the menu in my hands I thought maybe take out wasn’t such a bad idea. Last night’s meal had been absolutely delicious. I opened up the menu to have a browse, and let out a surprised, but happy squeal at the words scrawled in black marker across the page.

BETH TURNER AND MICK ST. JOHN 4 EVER

 

Contrary to what I’d thought, the week flew by. Mick had texted me when he arrived at Charles De Gaulle airport, and we’d exchanged texts every day since, although the nine hour time difference made things a bit awkward. He didn’t fill me in on any details of the mission, only that things were going to plan and all being well, he hoped to be back on Friday.

I had plenty to keep me occupied at work, and although I was fast coming to the conclusion that being a civilian investigator was not for me, I was glad of the diversion and it served to keep my mind off Mick and what was happening in France. The Morrison murder investigation seemed to have reached a dead end, and, in the absence of any other leads, Ben was now concentrating his efforts on finding the dead man’s re-location clients in the hope of finding a motive for the murder.

Worryingly, forensics were currently examining Mr Morrison’s computer hard drives with a view to finding a client list, and no amount of assurance from Josef that he was confident Brendon had not kept any electronic records, was enough to convince me. If my name were to turn up in connection with the re-location customers, I would have a lot of explaining to do.

Meanwhile Josef had also been busy with his own investigations into who was behind the strange Facebooked threat. It had been over a week now, and no other communication had been received. He’d enlisted the help of Ryder England, who was currently secreted away in an unknown location somewhere in South America. Luckily Ryder was still contactable by a very complicated series of anonymous e-mails, and had been working on pinpointing the origin of the message. Hacking Hemera’s Facebook account had been relatively easy, but uncovering the identity of the person or persons who had set it up was proving to be more difficult.

Logan had already tracked the IP address to the DA’s office, and Ryder had confirmed this to be the case. The question was from which one of the hundreds of computers within the building had the account been set up? 

I was almost certain Ben was an innocent party in all this. I knew him well enough by now to know that he was honorable and totally straight down the line where it came to law and justice. Wherever he had gotten that list from I had a feeling he was as much in the dark about this as we were. Nevertheless, it made me very nervous to think that I was quite possibly working unknowingly alongside someone who was capable of the horrific murder that had taken place.

It was Wednesday afternoon, Ben had been in court all day giving evidence for the prosecution on a high profile drugs case. He’d said not to expect him back before close of play, so I was hanging around tidying up some loose ends until an opportunity arose when I could sneak another look in his desk. I wasn’t sure quite what I was looking for but if there were any clues to be found which might throw some light on who had sent the list then it had to be worth a try.

“Do you have any shredding?” I started, surprised by the voice from the woman standing next to me.

She was holding a white sack containing a stack of confidential papers destined for destruction.

“No, thank you.” I shook my head.

“Okay, well have a good evening.” She closed the sack, tying the top off with a secure fastener before heading off to the office next door.

Angela, the lady who worked at the reception desk opened the door briefly on her way out. “Night Beth, don’t stay too late” she smiled.

“I won’t.” I returned her smile. “Just finishing this report off for Ben.”

That was all the excuse I needed. As soon as the door closed behind her, I stood up grabbing a set of statements from my desk, and headed to Ben’s office to put it on his desk. It was locked, but I had a key - another reason I was sure Ben knew nothing of what the list meant or he wouldn’t trust me with it.

Slipping inside the door I made a beeline for the drawer where I’d found the list. It wasn’t where it had been when I found it a few days ago, so I quickly skimmed through the contents, my breath catching in my throat as I came to a manilla folder ominously marked ‘Mick St. John’.

Flicking through the contents a feeling of dread came over me as I saw a series of photographs of Mick, taken outside his apartment block on the night when he’d been hit by the speeding car. Checking the contents again, it was apparent the photographs were the only item in the folder. No notes or anything to indicate their purpose.

A sick feeling was starting to overwhelm me. Dean Foster! This had to be his work didn’t it? But he was dead wasn’t he? I took a few deep breaths in an attempt to quell the panic that was starting to rise up. Not wanting to be caught, I quickly checked through the rest of the drawer and the ones below, but there was no sign of the list. Heart thumping, I re-locked Ben’s office, switched off my computer, grabbed my bag and headed for my car.

On the way to the parking lot I dialled Josef’s number. It went straight to voicemail so I left a short message asking him to meet me at Mick’s.

The traffic was diabolical, and I once again cursed my curiosity as my still sore foot was forced to press constantly on the clutch pedal. Finally reaching Mick’s brownstone building I parked the car and headed on up.

When I opened the door I was only half surprised to see Josef stretched out on Mick’s sofa with his feet up on the coffee table, nursing a frosted glass of his favorite beverage.

He placed the glass on the table and stood up as soon as I walked in, coming over to place a small kiss on my cheek in greeting.

“What’s up Buttercup?” he looked half worried and half amused.

“Josef…” I paused, not quite sure how to phrase my question. “You remember the photographer guy who was going after Mick?”

“Dean Foster?” 

I nodded. “That’s the one.”

Josef looked at me quizzically, “What about him?”

“He was…” I hesitated, “..taken care of, wasn’t he?”

He stuck his hands in his trouser pockets and began to pace in front of me. “Yes, he was ‘taken care’ of. Why do you ask?”

I explained about what I’d found earlier in Ben’s desk, and Josef sank back down on the sofa running his hand worriedly through his hair.

“That’s not good news, but really it doesn’t prove anything.” The worried look on his face as he said it belied his optimistic words. “Maybe this was his back up plan if blackmailing you didn’t work?”

“But what would he have to gain from the DA’s office?” I searched my brain for an answer. “Do you think he has anything to do with Hemera?” I had no idea what the connection might be, but nothing seemed to add up at the moment and I was clutching at straws.

Josef looked as mystified as I was. “I don’t know, but I can assure you he definitely wasn’t the one who sent me that message last week.”

He stood up making ready to leave. “I’ll pass the information on to Ryder and see if he can make anything of it. In the meantime,” he fixed me with a fatherly stare, “lock that door, and do not open it to anyone.”

As he turned to go I couldn’t help but ask, “Has Mick been in touch?”

He paused at the door, “Only to say everything’s going to plan and he hopes to be back Friday.” He must have caught the look on my face, as his face softened adding, “Beth, don’t worry. I know he loves you. Psycho bitch from hell doesn’t have a cat in hell’s chance against you..”

I smiled, not quite convinced, but thankful for his efforts. “Thanks Josef. Let me know if Ryder finds anything out.”

“Will do Baby Blue.”, and with that he was gone.

 

The following evening I was sitting at Mick’s desk trawling the internet in an attempt to find out any additional information I possibly could about Dean Foster. I’d already found out from Ben about a restraining order filed against him five years ago by another actress he’d been hounding, but other than that his record seemed clean. I’d managed to dig around at the DA’s office to confirm what Josef had already told me, and was relieved to see that his death had been recorded as homicide by unknown perpetrator, case closed due to lack of evidence. The theft of his camera equipment had been listed as possible motive.

He’d never married and had no children, something that came as a relief to me as I realized I’d never even stopped to think about whether he had a family. I made a note of his address and tried to get my head around a plan to search his home without incriminating myself in the process.

I was starting to get a bad feeling about the whole thing. I didn’t regret for a moment my decision to protect Mick, but I was beginning to realize that I’d crossed a dangerous line by going behind Mick’s back to ask for Josef’s help.

I snapped the laptop shut and headed to the kitchen in search of a glass of wine. As I was digging about in the cupboards in search of a corkscrew, the door buzzer went, and, feeling a bit jumpy as I wasn’t expecting anyone, I crossed the lounge to the viewscreen by the door. With relief I saw it was Simone, and pressed my finger on the button to let her in.

She was smiling broadly and brandishing an expensive looking bottle of wine as I opened the door.

“Hey Simone, it’s great to see you! This is a surprise…” I was so glad to see her. I hadn’t realized how alone and scared I’d been feeling until she showed up.

She stepped inside holding the wine bottle aloft. “A celebration is in order and I wanted someone to share it with” she beamed.

“Perfect timing,” I smiled back, throwing a slightly guilty glance in the direction of the bottle I’d just been trying to open, and running to grab an extra wine glass from the cupboard.

“So..” I asked exitedly, as we settled ourselves down on the sofa and Simone poured the wine, “what exactly are we celebrating?”

In response Simone smiled a huge Cheshire cat grin and raised her hand to brush the hair away from the side of her neck, turning slightly to the side so I could see.

The two small bitemarks showed clearly against her otherwise flawless skin, quite obviously, judging by Simone’s ecstatic face, of Josef’s doing.

I was so happy for her I squealed and threw my arms around her in delight. “Oh Simone, I’m so happy for you!” It seemed Josef had finally made the decision to move on, and I was so pleased for both of them. This was just what I needed to lighten the mood.

She hugged me back and, grinning, we clinked glasses in a toast.

“To our bloodsucking boyfriends!”

“So how did it make you feel?” I asked, taking a gulp of wine and tucking my legs up under me on the sofa, ready to hear all the details.

Simone blushed slightly, the wide smile on her face never diminishing as she recounted what had happened.

“I knew it would be more intimate, but I never expected to feel quite so…” she paused searching for the right word. “… connected? Is that the right word?” she looked at me for confirmation.

I knew just what she meant. The first time Mick had bitten me during lovemaking it had felt almost like we were together in mind as well as body. Hard to describe, but an amazing sensation to experience. I nodded in agreement.

There was a pause as we both remembered the strange experience.

I leaned over to top up our glasses, and fixed Simone with a happy grin of my own. I didn’t want to steal her thunder, but I wanted to share some good news of my own.

“Mick’s said he’ll turn me if I want it.” I said, somewhat shyly.

“Oh Beth!” This time it was Simone leaning over to hug me. “That’s wonderful news. You must be so happy!”

I looked at her, hoping she didn’t think I was being smug about it, but she must have realized what I was thinking. “Oh, don’t worry Beth… I’ll give Josef a while to get used to things, but if I’m reading him correctly I don’t think he’s ruled out the possibility. I’ll definitely be bringing up the subject again soon.”

The talk turned to Simone’s upcoming party, and we were soon discussing hairstyles and make up for the big event, polishing off the bottle of wine in the process.

Finally Simone’s taxi arrived and she stood up to go. We exchanged kisses, looking forward to the party on Saturday.

“I just hope Mick makes it back in time.” I said, trying to keep a positive note in my voice.

She looked at me sympathetically “I’m sure he will Beth” she assured me, giving me a warm hug on her way out.

Lying in bed, I was glad of the soporific effect of the wine. I didn’t want to think of the possibility of Mick not coming back.

I was just starting to drift off to sleep when a text message chimed on the phone next to the bed.

Love you, Mick X

I quite like you too, Beth X , I texted back with a grin, then another a couple of seconds later, Sorry… LOVE xx

With a happy smile, I pulled the comforter over me and turned over to go to sleep.

 

Friday morning came but no more texts from Mick, and I was starting to worry that maybe he wouldn’t be returning home today after all. Before he’d left he’d promised to text me to let me know when he was leaving. Not knowing what was going on was killing me, but I resisted the temptation to call Josef, sure that he would let me know straight away if anything had gone wrong.

Ben had asked me to help with some investigative research on the drugs case he was currently working on. Part of that research involved a trip to the other side of town to interview the defendant’s ex girlfriend, who Ben hoped might provide the essential evidence to convict him. Glad of something meaty to get my teeth into for a change, I gladly accepted the assignment and relished the opportunity to concentrate my mind on something other than what may or may not have been happening in France with Mick and Coraline.

The interview went better than expected. The girl was very young, and at first had seemed terrified of giving any information for fear of the retribution it might bring on her or her family. With gentle persuasion, and an extensive explanation of our witness protection programme, I finally managed to reassure her that we would not consider asking her to give evidence unless we were sure it was likely to bring about a conviction. I took down her statement and let her know we’d be in touch once Ben had had a chance to review it.

Feeling that for the first time I’d finally made a difference in my new job, I returned to the office with a sense of satisfaction in my work that I’d not felt in a long time. Ben was already back from court, and I proudly handed over the statement for him to assess.

“Excellent work Beth” he congratulated me, leaning back in his chair and scanning the first page with interest.

“Thank you” I beamed, blushing slightly at the praise.

“I’m going to read this through now. As for you…” he glanced up from the papers, “take an early night. You deserve it after all your hard work.”

“Thank you very much boss,” I grinned cheekily, tipping an imaginary hat at him, “I’ll do just that.”

He grinned back. “Goodnight Beth. Have a good weekend.”

“You too” I replied, turning and heading out the door. This would be the start of a perfect weekend I thought, if only Mick were back. As it was I was heading back to an empty apartment and another night wondering what was happening on the other side of the globe.

I grabbed my jacket from the coat rack and started out the main office door. As I turned the corner I walked slap bang into Josef, and almost let out a scream before I realized who it was.

“Jos……” he’d covered my mouth with his hand before I could get anything further out, and steered me down the corridor with a vice-like grip on my arm.

He leaned close to my ear, and spoke in a low voice, “You’re coming home with me tonight Beth. I’ll explain in the car.”

My heart had dropped to the floor at his words, and a sick feeling began to rise up in my stomach. My first thought was that something had happened to Mick, but I knew there was no point in trying to question Josef right now. He was on a mission it seemed, and not wanting to arouse suspicion while we were still in the District Attorney’s Offices, I allowed him to steer me towards a staircase and down several flights of steps that lead to a fire exit. Josef pushed on the bar and the door swung open to reveal a narrow alleyway with several dumpsters lining the walls.

I glanced at him in alarm, wondering why we couldn’t just have used the main exit. Closing the door, and walking me briskly along Josef obviously decided it was now safe to speak. “It’s okay Beth, I have a car waiting,” he reassured me, placing a comforting arm around my shoulder as he guided me down the dark passageway.

Looking at him in growing alarm, I had to ask, “Is Mick all right?”

He didn’t answer as we approached the car, a sleek silver Mercedes waiting with the engine running at the end of the alley, quickly opening the door and ushering me inside with a helping hand on the small of my back. The second the door closed the car was moving off, Josef’s driver at the wheel, and we both sank back into the seats as the car speeded away.

Apprehension mounting I turned to Josef and repeated my question, determined that this time he was going to answer me. “Josef, is Mick okay?”

“I don’t know Beth,” he answered honestly. I could see by the expression on his face that he was as worried as I was. “He’s not been in contact since yesterday..” he paused, the concern in his eyes very apparent as he held my gaze, “…neither have the two cleaners who went with him.”

“What about your freshies?” I asked, starting to worry in earnest. “Have you heard anything from them?”

“Mick was at the hotel last night. Coraline was with him.” He must have seen my look of alarm at that, adding “Not ‘with’ him, with him. Separate rooms I’m sure. They were planning the last stage of the operation. That’s all they know.”

Separate rooms? How could Josef possibly know that? I slumped, tears starting to prick behind my eyes, then gave myself a mental slap. Why was I worrying about separate rooms when Mick could be dead?

As if he’d read my mind, Josef picked up my hand and gave it a small squeeze. “Mick’s not stupid. He wouldn’t have gone into this if he didn’t think he could do it.” Changing tack, he looked at me quizzically. “Aren’t you curious as to why I practically just kidnapped you?”

Jerking myself out of the pointless anguish that would certainly do neither myself nor Mick any good, I quashed the tears that had been threatening and managed a small smile at Josef’s question. “Sorry, I'm just so worried about Mick, being kidnapped's just a minor blip on the radar at the moment." Giving him a serious look I made an attempt at humour. "You know I'm unlikely to command a large ransom don't you?"

He grinned at my half hearted joke. "Damn! I may as well kill you now and go find myself a wealthier hostage!" 

I made a feeble attempt at a smile."Okay, so why did you come get me?" I asked.

Josef's face was all seriousness again as he responded, “Your flat got broken into today.” 

“How…?” I started, suddenly panicked again but for a different reason this time.

“I’ve had a couple of my security team do regular checks on the place while you’ve been staying at Mick’s. It must have happened sometime between midday and 4:30pm today. Whoever it was turned the place upside down but I can’t tell if anything’s been taken.” He looked at me questioningly. “Would you know if there was anything anyone would be looking for?”

I was shaking my head, thoughts whizzing through my mind, trying to think of a reason behind it. “No…. I can’t think of anything..”

“What about Mick’s place?” My laptop, probably my most treasured possession, and all of my back up drives, were at Mick’s.

“His place is untouched,” Josef assured me. “I’ll have someone stop by and collect your things.”

Worried about whether someone else could be relied on to fetch all of my things, I managed to persuade Josef to make a diversion to Mick’s so we could pick up my belongings.

One short stop later I was ready to go. “If I’d have known you were bringing this much paraphernalia I’d have sent a removal truck..” Josef scowled, hefting my bulging suitcase. Refusing his driver’s offer of help, he lifted it easily and deposited it in the trunk himself.

I stifled a snicker and thanked him politely, climbing back into the silver Mercedes and fastening my seatbelt as Josef slid in to the seat beside me.

***************************************

Josef’s house was a stunning work of modern architecture, nevertheless nestled harmoniously into the surrounding hills and greenery. Slightly incongruous to the modern theme, two stone lions guarded the entrance gates like a pair of feline gargoyles. As we pulled up the security guard greeted ‘Mr Kostan’ and the gates swung open, the gravel scrunching loudly under the tyres as we made our way up the winding driveway, passing through a beautifully manicured shrubbery, finally pulling up in front of a wide set of steps leading up to the ornate glass front door.

I couldn’t help but admire the beauty of it all. It was a mix of modern clean lines and symmetry, cleverly mixed with the ornate decoration more akin to historic homes.

“You have a beautiful home Josef” I complimented him, running my fingers appreciatively over the ornate carved stone banister.

“It beats hanging upside down from a cave ceiling,” he quipped, watching with amusement as his driver hauled my case out of the trunk and eyed the flight of steps with trepidation. Grinning, he moved in and took the case from him, “Thanks, but I’ll take Miss Turner’s bag from here.”

Looking relieved, the driver let Josef take the case, and we walked up the steps to the front door. Before we even reached the top the door was opened by a tall woman with shoulder length auburn hair, who looked to be in her forties. “Good evening Mr Kostan…” she greeted him, holding the door to let us through. Her eyes turned to me expectantly and she raised her eyebrows at Josef, “…and ..?”

“Beth” Josef supplied, looking amused at the woman’s obvious interest.

“Beth,” he turned to me, “meet Helena Johnston. My P.A. for the last twenty five years.”

I dutifully shook Helena’s proffered hand. Josef shot Helena a wicked grin, adding “…although I think she thinks she’s also my mother…”

"Take no notice of him." Helena shot a scolding look at Josef before turning back to me. "I'll show you to your room dear, then we'll see if Reni can't rustle you up something for dinner. Are you hungry?"

I couldn't help but take an instant liking to Helena. She did indeed have the air of a mother hen and was totally not what I had expected as Josef's choice of P.A.

As Helena linked her arm through mine and began leading me through the enormous open plan hallway toward a wide set of winding glass stairs, Josef had no choice but to follow in our wake with my case in tow. I had to snicker at her irreverent attitude towards her employer. I was more used to seeing Josef treated with deference by those in his service and it was refreshing to see someone other than Mick take such an assertive attitude. 

My room was divine and almost as large as my whole apartment, tastefully decorated in subtle pale earthy tones and with an equally oversized en suite bathroom with marble fittings and a stunning lion's foot bath set at the centre. Exploring further I discovered a walk in closet I could have got lost in, and certainly had no hope of filling with the paltry few clothes I had with me.

After dropping my suitcase off, Josef had excused himself, apologising that he had several urgent things to see to back at work, but would call in to check on me later if I was still up.

Helena introduced me to Reni, a very down to earth looking woman who looked to be in her early sixties, and also turned out to be a superb cook. I tucked in to a helping of delicious lasagne she'd made for two of Josef's live in freshies, only wishing I had a bottle of wine to wash it down with, but not liking to ask in case they thought I was some kind of lush. I didn't imagine I was going to get much sleep tonight, with my mind still running through possible reasons for Mick's lack of contact, and a glass or two of wine would certainly have helped in that department. 

Helena made sure I had everything I needed and offered to keep me company for the evening, but although under normal circumstances I would have loved to get to know her, all I really wanted to do was be by myself for a while and give my brain a chance to digest the latest developments. 

Helena normally only lived in during the week, but she would be staying the night tonight to ensure I didn't feel left on my own. I’d made the assumption, from her warm handshake, that Helena was human, and it was comforting to know that I wasn’t a lone human in a vampire dominated environment.

She'd introduced me to Josef's security personnel, who I guessed from the temperature of their handshakes, consisted of a mixture of vampires and humans, and I knew the number to dial should there be any reason for concern.

Bidding me goodnight, Helena headed off back downstairs to catch her favorite soap on television, and I collapsed gratefully onto the bed, sprawling with a sigh across the super soft and luxurious coverlet and staring up at the ceiling, utterly exhausted by the day’s events. I was instantly fascinated and surprised, instead of a plain white ceiling, to see an exquisite painting depicting delicate climbing roses in subtle shades of pink and yellow, scrambling along the domed glass roof of an old fashioned conservatory. The pale blue sky and wispy white clouds were clearly visible through the panes. Whoever had painted it had managed to instill a true perspective of depth into the artwork, and I felt as though I could have been lying on the floor of a real greenhouse on a warm springtime day.

Totally distracted from my current concerns over Mick, my apartment break in, and the whole Hemera threat in general, I gazed up at the painting, utterly captured by its beauty, and marvelling at the skill it must have taken to produce such a masterpiece. Was this guest bedroom intended for a vampire I wondered? To give them a taste of sunshine and the outdoors, without the obvious drawbacks that came with being a vampire?

I was still staring in awe at the sight above me when I was startled out of my reverie by the ringing of my phone. Immediately I scrambled up off the duvet and dived for my purse which I’d thrown on the armchair adjacent to the bed.

With immense relief I saw the name Mick St. John flashing on the display, and hastily swiped my finger across the screen before the phone could get past its third ring and go to voicemail.

“Mick! Is that you?” I tried not to sound too desperate, but failed utterly.

“No, it’s the Chinese takeaway calling to ask if you wanted prawn crackers with your order…” came the deep, warm voice I’d come to love so well, “…of course it’s me!” he answered, sounding somewhat amused and maybe just a little concerned too.

It was like a switch had been flicked in my head, worried and tired over to wide awake and ecstatic in the push of a button. “It’s so good to hear from you! Are you on your way back?” I asked, mindful of not asking any pertinent questions over the phone.

“Plane boards in half an hour,” he replied, and I could hear the smile in his voice as he said it. “I should be touching down in LAX in about 12 hours from now. Everyone’s fine”.

My face felt like it was going to split from the wide grin plastered all over it. Everything was going to be okay. Mick was coming back. I’d always known I felt safe with Mick around, but it wasn’t until he’d been physically out of the country for a week that I had any inkling of just how safe.

“What’s your flight number?” I asked. “I’ll be there to pick you up.”

He gave me his flight details, and, giving up on ever finding a pen and pad in the disorganized jumble inside my purse, I jotted the number down in eyebrow pencil on the back of my hand.

“One more thing…” he said, the tone of his voice indicating suppressed excitement, “… could you do me a favor and stock up the food cupboards for me before I get back…?”

There was a pause as my brain ticked over, trying to decide whether he meant what I thought he meant, or whether he was talking about blood.

“Coffee, bacon, bread, butter, ketchup… you know the kind of thing..” he supplied.

Oh my God…oh my God…oh my God!! I was screaming with happiness inside my head, careful not to let it spill out into actual speech, my Cheshire Cat grin spreading impossibly wider by the second.

“And we are so stopping at In-N-Out on the way back from the airport…” he sounded so hungry I could almost see him licking his lips on the other end of the line, “… I am going to have the biggest quadruple with extra cheese, cheese-burger they do!”

I was momentarily struck dumb with happiness that for a few seconds I was totally incapable of a response.

“Beth…? Beth…are you still there?” came his anxious voice.

Letting out the breath I didn’t know I’d been holding, I practically squeaked back at him I was so overjoyed. “Yes…yes.. I can do that!”

“I’ll tell you all about it when I get back. I love you Beth.”

“I love you too. See you tomorrow Mick.”

The scream of excitement I let out as I flung my phone back into my purse and did a happy dance around the room was so loud that three of Josef’s security staff burst through my bedroom door mere moments later, bemused expressions crossing their faces as they lowered their weapons and tactfully withdrew.

 

To be continued/……………………


	24. Mirror In The Bathroom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It took a while but I'm finally posting chapter 24. After putting it off for a few chapters I'm now moving the story onwards at last. I hope you enjoy.  
> Galaxy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Rating: This chapter NC-17
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 24

*2008*

The following morning Josef drove me to the airport himself, flatly refusing to allow me to go anywhere on my own, insistent that Mick had entrusted him with my safety and that his undead life wouldn’t be worth living should anything happen to me before Mick got back.

“I really don’t know what Mick’s fascination with mortality is,” grumbled Josef, ramming the Ferrari back down a gear as the early morning traffic slowed, “I mean who seriously wants to listen to the tick tock of their own looming demise all day long?” he grimaced, “And all those uncouth bodily functions!”

I glared over at him and he spared me an apologetic look, realising what he’d said. “Present company excepted of course,” he swiftly back-peddled, flashing me a charming, slightly scared looking, smile.

“Well absolutely Josef.” I said icily. “I couldn’t agree more that having to suck all that icky, messy blood out of one of those humans is so much less uncouth than using a knife and fork, even if we do have to use the restroom occasionally!”

There was a pause as Josef opened his mouth, then, failing to come up with a suitable witty quip, slowly closed it again. “Sorry,” he said, looking genuinely contrite.

“Apology accepted,” I smiled, shaking my head, “and I promise I’ll try to keep my bodily functions to myself,” I teased.

“Touché,” he smiled back.

“Seriously though,” he continued, “with everything going on right now, Mick really couldn’t have picked a worse time to decide to re-enter the mortal coil.”

“Josef, just because we’re human doesn’t mean we’re incapable of looking after ourselves you know.”

He glanced at me, his expression suddenly sober, “Beth, turning Mick back was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.” He stared ahead at the road, a pained expression on his face, as if reliving the experience. “But I did it because he begged me to do it. He couldn’t save you as a man, but he could as a vampire. I really don’t want to have to do that ever again.” Frowning, he took his hand from the steering wheel and nervously raked it through his hair.

I was momentarily taken aback by his emotional outburst, almost feeling the physical impact of the pain radiating from him in waves. I’d never given much thought as to how Josef had felt about re-turning Mick, he always joked about it whenever Mick called him ‘dad’ or teased him about being his sire. I’d assumed it wasn’t a big deal. Quite obviously I’d been completely wrong.

I reached out a hand to touch his arm. “I’m sorry Josef,” I said simply.

Placing his own hand briefly over mine, he gave a small smile. “I suppose it comes with the territory when your best friend’s a non-fat, soy, vegan-blood-drinking ass!”

I grinned at his comment, then, in a bid to lighten the mood a bit, I reached down for my purse in the foot-well and hauled it onto my lap, proceeding to open it up and rummage around for the long piece of wood I always kept in there. Locating it at last, I brandished it at him, “Girl Guide motto – always be prepared! I have a stake, and I’m not afraid to use it!”

Glancing at the implement in my hand, he snickered warily. “I’ll remember to keep on your good side.” 

………………………………….

 

Waiting in the arrivals area I started to get strangely nervous about seeing Mick again. Thoughts of what might have taken place during the week away started running through my head, and I found myself wondering about Mick and Coraline. Mick had already pre-warned me that Coraline was returning to L.A. with him. Her friend Cynthia had rented an apartment somewhere where Lance would be unlikely to track her down if he decided to come looking, and she’d be safer in L.A. with Mick and Josef able to look out for her. I still couldn’t help be suspicious of her motives in the whole thing though, and I’d yet to find out why Mick had used some of the cure. Was it Coraline’s doing, and, if so, what had she to gain from it? What exactly had they been doing the whole time in France? Surely it hadn’t taken a whole week to put the plan into action? Had they reconciled their differences?

“Beth!”

I started as Josef barked my name, and came back to reality just in time to right my coffee cup before I spilled the entire lot down my cleavage.

Grabbing a napkin from the nearby coffee stand, Josef took the coffee from me with one hand whilst handing me the napkin with the other.

Disposing of the coffee in a nearly trash receptacle, he shook his head as he watched me dab at the front of my shirt in an attempt to wipe off the ugly brown stain. “I cannot take you anywhere can I?” Then, looking up as he caught sight of Mick and Coraline appearing though the doorway. “Ah, here they come now.”

I looked up and instantly stiffened at the sight of Coraline, walking closely at Mick’s side, looking for all the world like they were the happy couple. Mick was smiling, turning his head toward Coraline to say something. Whatever he said made her laugh, and without warning the loathing I felt for the woman who’d tried to steal me away as a child started to bubble up inside me.

A hand on my shoulder brought me back to the moment, and Josef leaned close to my ear, speaking in a low voice. “If you’re thinking of using that stake in your bag, I’d recommend you don’t do it in the airport”. He grinned, glancing at the security cameras, “CCTV is everywhere.”

I blanched, wondering for a second if Josef could actually read my mind, then put on my best smile and walked forward to greet a very happy looking Mick, and an impeccably dressed Coraline, who, most annoyingly, definitely did not have an ugly brown coffee stain down the front of her impeccably tailored, low cut, cleavage-revealing, blouse.

…………………………………..

 

As soon as Mick caught sight of me my fears were instantly quelled. He broke away from Coraline, a huge smile on his face, and caught me up in a tight bear hug, pressing his face into my neck and breathing my name hotly against my skin as he rocked us gently back and forth. 

Finally loosening his hold on me, we pulled apart enough to look at each other, and I could see Mick's face was beaming with the same happy look I remembered from a few months ago. His ‘human’ look. Like an excited little boy, full of the joys of spring and eager to do some exploring. It was infectious, and I couldn't help but reflect it back at him through my own broad smile. He leaned down to me and our lips met in a chaste but lingering kiss that wiped all coherent thought instantly from my brain, as all I knew was the warmth of his lips on mine, his strong arms holding me tight, and how everything was suddenly right with the world.

For a few brief moments it was just us. The noise of the airport receded and we were in a world of our own, oblivious to our surroundings and lost in a perfect moment. But as with all moments, suddenly it was past, and as our lips parted, the noise and bustle of the airport rushed back in, and Mick seemed to be sniffing the air, trying to identify something he'd smelled.

I looked at him curiously, then the penny dropped as he finally identified the scent and beamed the word "Coffee!" 

"Yeah," I grinned, "couldn't find my usual perfume, so I thought I'd throw on some 'eau de coffee' instead. You like it?"

"I have to have coffee," he stated, grabbing my hand and dragging me over to the nearby coffee stand. His face melted into ecstasy as he took his first sip. "Whatever they serve on planes is definitely not coffee," he decided.

Josef sauntered over with his two freshies, Chloe and Emily, each clinging onto him possessively. I studied the two young women, knowing that Mick had fed from these girls. It was an intimacy that I was still uncomfortable with, even though I knew it had been necessary for this trip. At least with Mick I knew he wouldn't be in need of their services again for a while. How Simone coped with the situation with Josef, I found hard to comprehend. I guess I still had a lot to learn about vampire ways.

"Coraline’s gone with Cynthia, and I’m taking these two lovely ladies with me,” he informed us, eying Mick with a look of slight distaste as he swallowed down another gulp of coffee and let out a deep sigh of satisfaction. “Want a ride with us, or are you making your own way back?”

“Thanks Josef but I think we’ll take a cab,” Mick told him, turning to look at me, “..if that’s okay with you Beth?”

“Fine with me,” I confirmed, realising belatedly that I’d not even noticed Coraline had already gone, and feeling a bit bad that I’d not even acknowledged her. “Maybe we can stop for breakfast on the way back?” I suggested, seeing Mick’s eyes light up at the idea.

Josef’s face wrinkled in disgust. “See..” he directed at me, “bodily functions already! What did I tell you?”

Mick ignored the comment, too happy at the thought of food to worry about Josef’s distaste for the human condition. He drained the last of his coffee like it was nectar of the Gods and grinned at Josef like he was fit to burst with happiness. “You have no idea what you’re missing my friend. Did they even have coffee back in your day?”

“No Starbucks, but yes, we did have coffee actually,” Josef answered sarcastically. “We even had clothes back then. You’d be amazed how civilised is was!”

Before we left, Josef took Mick aside for a quick de-briefing on the week’s events, and to bring him up to speed with the latest developments with regard to the break in at my apartment. We accompanied Josef back to his car, where he surreptitiously slipped something into Mick’s hand, before bidding us goodbye.

“Don’t be late for Simone’s party,” Josef reminded us as he climbed into the Ferrari, a giggling Chloe and Emily already ensconced in the back.

“We won’t!” I promised as the engine gunned to life and the sleek car roared away from the curb. As they sped into the distance I realised guiltily that I’d completely forgotten about Simone’s impending party.

……………………………………

 

We ate breakfast at a small family restaurant just around the block from Mick’s building, and I couldn’t stop smiling at how Mick practically had an orgasm over everything he ate.

“Is there anything you don’t like?” I teased as he tucked into second helpings of chocolate pancakes, eggs, bacon and hash browns. 

Having a mouthful of bacon at the time, he couldn’t reply, only shake his head with a smile as he chewed. I’d finished my breakfast already, but watching him eat was a whole new experience for me and I was fascinated at the simple pleasure a morsel of food could bring to a person.

“The rate you’re going we’re going to have to stop in at the outsize men’s store on the way back to get you a new outfit for the party!”

“I have an idea how I can work off a few calories,” he grinned back at me, “…that’s assuming you’re free this afternoon?”

“I might be..” I hedged teasingly. “Are you sure you won’t just be collapsing on the couch for a post breakfast nap though?”

“No napping,” he promised, “at least not until we’re fully reacquainted.”

“’Fully reacquainted’?” I laughed. “Shouldn’t you be giving me a full de-briefing me and planning our next move?”

He raised one eyebrow and eyed me suggestively. “Trust me, I know exactly what moves I plan to make, and I can assure you that you’ll be getting a full de-briefing.”

I nearly choked over my tea at his last comment. I gestured at his still half full plate, “you’d better get on and finish that then, or were you planning on having thirds?”

He managed to forgo a third helping, and finally we arrived back at his brownstone building just before midday. The sun was high in the sky, and rather than the normal long sleeved jacket and sunglasses, Mick was luxuriating in the heat of the day in a short sleeved t-shirt, squinting his eyes against the bright sun. As we stood before the door to the building he turned his face up to the sky, spreading his arms wide and taking a deep breath as though to inhale the sunshine.

“I’ve missed this,” he said. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed this.”

I smiled at the sight of him, shaking my head, glad he was happy, but not really fully understanding what all this meant to him. “Come on,” I said, pushing open the door, “apparently I have a full de-briefing to undergo, and I’m warning you now, I will require at least three hours to get ready for Simone’s party tonight.”

We opened the door to Mick’s loft and I was glad to see my giant suitcase had already been dropped off. I walked forward to grab the handle and started to wheel it toward the stairs, when Mick’s hand on mine stopped me in my tracks, and he stood the suitcase firmly back on its base, taking both my hands in his.

“This is the first time we’ve been totally alone together since I got back, and the first thing you want to do is unpack?”

“Well I er……”

Before I could finish he hooked one arm around my back and the other under my legs and scooped me up, a big grin plastered all over his face. “I have other plans for you….” he raised his eyebrows meaningfully, “….that don’t involve clothes...”

“Well I guess the unpacking can wait!” I laughed.

Starting towards the staircase, he re-adjusted my weight in his arms, and looked a bit puzzled. “Have you put on weight since I’ve been away?”

Staring back at him like he was an idiot I resisted the temptation to say ‘Duh!’. “Erm…, ever think that maybe being human again has something to do with it?”

“Ah..”, he had decency to look apologetic, “you may have a point there.” Reaching the bottom of the stairs he set me gently on my own two feet. “Wouldn’t want to drop you,” he grinned mischievously, leaning down and touching his lips to mine.

Like it always seemed to do whenever we kissed, my belly instantly flip flopped, and I stepped into him, twisting my arms around neck and deepening the kiss, any plans about unpacking my suitcase completely forgotten. By the time we finally came up for air I could feel his erection straining hard against his jeans, and a moist heat beginning to blossom between my legs.

“Oh my God Beth…” he groaned, his hot breath feeling at the same time alien and wonderful against my neck, “I’ve missed you so much..”

 

……………………………………

 

Somehow we made it up the stairs and into the bedroom without ever breaking off our kiss. We stood beside the bed, lips still pressed together, exploring each other’s mouths with our tongues as our hands attempted to remove each other’s clothes with our eyes closed. I had Mick’s shirt unbuttoned and pushed down as far as it would go, while his hands were underneath my shirt, attempting to undo my front-fastening bra from the back.

“It’s front-fastening”, I managed to gasp out, momentarily breaking off our kiss.

We stepped apart slightly, Mick never taking his eyes from me as he freed his arms from his shirt and moved forward to unbutton mine.

I stood on tiptoe and reached up to claim his mouth once more, my hands moving down over his hot skin until they reached his belt. My fingers felt their way to the buckle and urgently began to tug it undone. Having released the clasp, I inched down to start work on the buttons below, and he took a sudden sharp intake of breath as I brushed over his erection.

“How on earth does this new-fangled contraption undo?” he moaned, still struggling with my bra.

I reached up and deftly undid the hook, my breasts falling heavily into Mick’s hands as I shrugged it over my shoulders and tossed it onto the floor. He cupped both breasts tenderly, lowering his head to bestow a kiss against each nipple. As his lips touched my skin, it felt like a bolt of electricity shot straight to my core, and I let out a surprised gasp.

Mick raised his eyes to mine. “Beth, you are so beautiful.” 

I stared back into those beautiful eyes, framed with long black lashes, the irises sparkling amber in the centre, circled with green and outlined in blue.

“You’re not so bad yourself..” I smiled wickedly. Then running my tongue suggestively over my bottom lip, with a come hither lift of my brow, “..now get your clothes off!”

His laugh lit up his whole face, but he didn’t waste any time obeying my order. I followed suit, quickly unzipping my jeans and casting them aside. Finally slipping my panties off and throwing them on top of the abandoned pile of clothes. As Mick’s underwear hit the pile I turned to look at him, standing before me in all his naked glory. Weirdly I was somehow expecting something to be different now that Mick was temporarily human. But apart from a slightly more rosy tone to his skin, he looked every bit the same as he’d looked before.

He smiled as he caught me looking him over. “Did you expect something to have changed?” he said, emphasising the ‘something’ as he peered down at himself as though to double-check.

“Of course not!” I lied, feeling the heat of embarrassment colouring my cheeks, “I mean…why would it?”

He smiled, shaking his head. “You don’t suddenly get a bigger one the minute you’re turned!” he snickered.

“Actually….” I decided, pretending to scrutinise his mid-section, “… the stomach area definitely looks a bit more paunchy…”

“It does not!” he retorted indignantly, even as he ran his hands over his impeccably muscled stomach to make sure.

“Made you look though….” I teased, squealing as he made a grab for me and wrestled me to the bed, trying his best to find my ticklish spots. 

Panting from the exertion of trying to squirm away from his roaming hands I finally called for a truce, and we lay on the bed trying to get our breath back. I was underneath, the lower half of my body pinned by Mick’s, and the upper portion held in place by his arms pinning mine against my sides.

Pressed together skin to skin as we were, I could feel the heat radiating from him and, in turn, warming my own skin. It seemed incredible after being used to the usual coolness, and I wiggled my arms free, caressing every inch of flesh I could reach, revelling in the new, albeit temporarily, human Mick. He felt hot and alive. The sensation of it was wonderful.

“Mick,” I breathed, as he nuzzled into the crook of my neck, bestowing little butterfly kisses as he went, “you’re so hot…”

Laughing, he looked up, giving me a smutty grin in response. “Don’t you know it baby..”

I whacked him playfully on the shoulder. “You know what I mean,” I quickly clarified. “Your skin…it’s so warm…so human.”

He regarded me seriously for a moment, reaching out his hand to smooth a tumbling lock of hair away from my face. “Do you realise this will be the first time I’ve made love as a human in over fifty years?”

I caught his hand, holding it against my cheek, and turned to place a small kiss against his palm. “So I guess it’s sort of like... I’m your first?" Somehow just the thought of what that implied made me feel very honoured.. "At least in a ‘human again’ kind of way?”

“I guess…” he replied, looking suddenly nervous.

Before he could start to think about it too deeply, I quickly closed the distance between us and kissed him with all the love and longing I felt inside. He responded instantly, his arms closing tightly around me, and kissed me back with a passion equal to my own. Pressed as closely as we were, I could sense the slight movement in his groin, and the feel of his burgeoning erection pressing into my belly seemed to set off a chain reaction, producing an echoing response from between my thighs.

Mick's expert hand between my legs was fast bringing me to the edge, but what I really wanted was to come with Mick inside me, so I gently moved his hand away, threading my fingers through his and wordlessly telling him to roll over as I pinned his arm to the sheets. Our positions now reversed, I settled my thighs to either side of Mick’s hips and, with my other hand, reached down to guide him to my entrance.

Quite suddenly, as if he’d just remembered something, Mick pulled away slightly, sitting bolt upright with me in his lap.

“God Beth!” he exclaimed, slapping a hand to his head as if he’d just remembered something. “I’m such an idiot!”

Confused, I stared at him, perplexed. “What do you mean? What’s wrong?”

He shook his head, the expression on his face panicked. “Protection! I don’t have any protection!”

“Protection?” I echoed, not getting it. We’d locked the door and Mick’s apartment had a state of the art security system. If anyone was trying to get in, we’d know about it.

“I’m human Beth…” he stated, looking at me as though I should understand.

“Oh!” Suddenly I got it. “Oh…..” I repeated, this time with disappointment tingeing my voice as I realised the implications. Mick obviously didn’t want to risk getting me pregnant.

“Are you on the pill?” he asked, looking momentarily hopeful.

I shook my head. “I stopped taking it after Josh died…,” I frowned at the sudden painful memories that the mention of his name evoked. “…there didn’t seem much point…” my voice trailed off.

Mick looked both mortified and apologetic. “Beth…I’m so sorry, I completely forgot.”

For long moments I just sat in his lap, not sure how to respond. We’d talked about the possibility of maybe being able to have children together at some point in the future. Hell, we’d even jokingly picked out a name! Sure, this unexpected turn of events had thrown a slight curve ball into the mix, neither of us had expected Mick to regain his humanity again so soon, if ever. But now that he had…

I looked at Mick. In contrast to his earlier happiness, his face was a picture of frustration and disappointment. With sudden clarity it dawned on me that if we were really serious about wanting to be together forever, and maybe having a child of our own some day, there was never going to be a better time than right here and now.

I took a deep breath. “I’m okay with it if you are.”

Initially he looked surprised, then his eyes flicked to the distance, and I could almost see him thinking it through, his brows knitted together, deep in thought.

Finally his eyes met mine. “It’s okay with me.” He said.

The certainty in his voice as he said it made my heart feel fit to burst. It was as though we’d all at once crossed a line in our relationship. There was a definite future stretching ahead of us. One we both intended to share together.

I didn’t seem able to speak, but the Cheshire Cat grin plastered all over my face must have been words enough, and Mick tilted his head towards mine, brushing his lips against mine in a sweet, slow kiss that started off chaste but soon deepened as I ran my tongue along the seam of his mouth and felt his immediate response as his tongue thrust eagerly forward to meet mine.

When, for the second time, Mick was at last poised to enter me, our eyes locked, and for an instant it felt like there was a joining of minds as well as bodies. I stared at Mick, thinking that whatever happened now, I wanted to be with this man for the rest of my life. So what if he was a vampire and I was a human, we’d work it out together somehow. As he gazed back at me, the love I saw reflected in Mick’s eyes almost took my breath away.

A mischievous look crossed suddenly crossed Mick’s face. “Be gentle with me….” he said, his eyes sparkling with humour, and maybe just a hint of a challenge.

Sinking down onto Mick’s length, feeling him stretching and filling me, and stifling a moan at the intense burst of pleasure that the sensation of fullness induced, I looked back at him in total seriousness.

“Just lie back and think of England…”

He started to laugh, but the laughter turned to groans of pleasure as I rolled my hips above him, angling them so Mick would hit my pleasure spot, and gasping aloud as he did.

His arms pulled me down into a kiss and I continued the slow undulation of my pelvis, feeling the pleasure begin to build with every downward stroke, and an element of power as Mick's kiss became ever increasingly frantic under my ministrations.

Suddenly he reversed our positions, his dark hair tumbling around his face as he moved above me and began to thrust into me with painfully delicious slowness. For minutes on end, we moved together in total harmony, our whole beings joined and interacting seemingly of their own accord, the only sounds in the room our gasps and groans of pleasure.

Mick began to speed up the pace, each thrust coming faster and faster, and what had been slowly building before, suddenly seemed to be rushing to a climax.

“Oh God… Mick….” I uttered, feeling the ballooning sensation inside that at any minute was threatening to erupt.

Mick's hazel eyes gazed fervently into mine. "Come for me Beth.."

As if those words were all I needed to hear, my lips parted in a surprised ‘o’ and the damn inside me finally broke as I began to convulse around him. I stared helplessly into the depths of his exquisite eyes as my release finally burst outward, tingling throughout my body until I felt saturated and overdosed with euphoria.

A couple of seconds later Mick’s own eyes widened as his orgasm overtook him, his body stilling and a barely stifled cry escaping his lips, as, shuddering, he gave himself up to the bliss, coming hard and deep inside me.

Collapsing on top of me, he buried his head against my neck and brought his arms tightly around me. In turn I folded my arms over Mick's back and held him gently as we both took time to get our breath back.

Finally lifting his head from the nook of my shoulder where it had fallen, Mick bestowed a light but lingering kiss on my lips.

“I love you Beth Turner.” He smiled.

“And I love you Mick St. John.” I smiled back. Then, teasingly. “You didn’t do too badly for a first time…”

I laughed at the indignant look on his face, adding, “I’m a willing teacher though. I think I can fit you in most evenings….”

He shook his head, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “What am I going to do with you?"

…………………………………

We snuggled together, Mick pulling the comforter over us for warmth, which in itself was unusual, although not in a bad way. Normally it was me reaching for the blankets, while Mick relished the air conditioned coolness of the air on his exposed skin.

Mick lay on his back with me curled into his side, my head resting on his shoulder and his arm wrapped around my shoulders.

“So…” I said, feeling a discussion coming on, “… now that I’ve undergone the de-briefing… do I get to hear about what happened in France?” I lifted my head to look at him questioningly.

He gave me a resigned look that said he’d been half expecting an interrogation, and half smiled in response. “It’s a long story,” he said, sitting up slightly and pulling some pillows behind us to make us more comfortable, “..but long story short, we got what we went for, and although Lance knows I broke Coraline out, I’m pretty sure that’s all he knows. I don’t think he’s aware that she got away with the hidden stash of the cure.”

I propped myself up on one elbow and turned to look at him. “So you got it all then?”

“Not all. Lance still has the small amount he took back from Coraline when she bargained it for my life.” He looked thoughtful.

“But wouldn’t that be the first thing Lance would check? That Coraline didn’t rip him off a second time?” I questioned, thinking that this all sounded a bit too easy.

“If he has checked, we can only hope that he didn’t do it too thoroughly,” Mick smiled, “…and that the damson confit Coraline used to fill the container back up, is still doing a passable impression of the real thing.”

“You used damson jelly?” I was incredulous. “Won’t Lance be able to smell the difference straight away?”

“Not through an airtight sealed jar he won’t.” Mick shrugged. “But if he opens it….”

“So you’re hoping Lance is just going to think you went back for Coraline..” I paused for a moment, my thoughts starting to wander in a direction I didn’t want to go, “…because you’re still in love with her?”

There was a slight pause before Mick answered. “…Yes.”

He must have seen the sudden look of doubt cross my face because he reached out a hand to caress my cheek softly. “But you know that I’m not, right?” He raised his eyebrows, looking for an answer.

Did I? I knew he loved me. I wasn’t in any doubt about that. What I wasn’t so sure of was whether he still harboured a spark of love somewhere in the depths of his heart for the woman who’d driven him to the brink of insanity, then stolen his life from him. What were the words Josef had used? ‘One of those terrifying, completely self-destructive freakshows that you spend your whole life searching for knowing it can only end in one or both of you dead.’

Mick was gazing at me intently, my lack of reply causing a furrow to form between his brows. “Beth….”

I cut him off, covering his hand with mine where it lay against my cheek. “I know Mick. I know…”

He didn’t look convinced. “Beth… there is nothing between Coraline and I anymore. You’re the one I want to be with. You’re the one I love.”

I wanted to believe him. I wanted to believe him so much. But that tiny flicker of doubt still remained. I leaned forward to place a light kiss against Mick’s lips, lingering for a few moments to savour the sweetness.

He gave me an odd look, almost like he knew what I was thinking, a mixture of sadness and disappointment. I wished so badly that I didn’t feel the way I did, but I’d seen the way Mick looked at Coraline, and no matter how much he wanted to be with me, I knew he still had feelings for her, despite what he might say.

Before the moment became uncomfortable, I swiftly changed the subject. “So how come you used some of the compound then? Was it necessary to pass for human at some stage? Did Coraline take it too?” I was deliberately bombarding him with questions in an attempt to distract from my jealous feelings towards Coraline. I took an inward sigh of relief as my diversionary tactics seemed to be working.

“No,” he assured me, “..it was just me. And it was only ‘necessary’ for one reason really…” He raised his eyes to mine. “I took your advice…”

“My advice?” It was my turn to raise my eyebrows.

“Not to trust her. I needed to be sure we weren’t getting duped. It seemed the best way to be certain.” His face split into a wide grin. “And it feels… just amazing! I can’t wait to wake up tomorrow morning snuggled under a duvet with you!”

I laughed. “And the breakfast... don’t forget the breakfast!”

“Oh…” he sighed in ecstasy, closing his eyes as his tongue snaked hungrily over his lower lip, “… I won’t be forgetting the breakfast..”

“Human Mick…” I mused, grinning and patted his tummy playfully. “Just remember that fridge pickers wear bigger knickers…”

“Hey!” he retorted indignantly. “I exercise!”

“Well try ‘exercising’ a bit of control in the eating department, or you might find yourself changing back into a pot-bellied vampire at some point.” The thought of Mick ever developing a beer gut was hard to imagine, taking into consideration his strict workout regime, but I couldn’t resist ribbing him about it.

“Okay,” he conceded, “maybe you have a point.”

“So…” I continued my line of questioning, “..where is the compound now exactly? Do you have it?” A sudden terrible thought occurred to me. “Please don’t tell me Coraline took it with her?” 

“No…” he was quick to reassure me. “We split it into three, partly to reduce the risk of it being confiscated by customs, or lost in the luggage. Coraline has one third, the cleaner took one, and I had one.”

“Had?” I picked up on the past tense immediately.

“I gave it to Josef when we left the airport.” Mick explained, and I realised that what I’d thought was Josef slipping something into Mick’s hand had been the other way around.  
“Now that you come to mention it…” he looked concerned, “..maybe I’d better call and make sure his freshies don’t have damson confit in their sandwiches tomorrow?”

I raised my eyes to his in horror, only to see a wicked grin splitting his face from ear to ear.

“Not funny!” I exclaimed, thinking this still sounded far too good to be true. “So….” I mused, my brain trying to work the plan out, “..what, will Josef keep hold of it in case the balloon goes up and then dish it out as required?”

“Not quite….” Mick explained, “Josef agreed to fund a new lab to try synthesising the cure again. Coraline will be in charge of the research while Josef stumps up the money.”

“Oh?” This was news to me. “But didn’t Coraline already try that?” I queried.

“She was getting close, but the lab got torched after Lance paid a visit and beheaded the lead scientist. Coraline is convinced that given more time, and a team of specialised research scientists, she should be able to at least make a synthetic substitute capable of producing the same effects as the real thing.” He looked at me pointedly. “Ultimately, it could even be possible to improve on the original and make the cure permanent.”

A permanent cure! I could see by the look in Mick’s eyes that this was all he’d dreamed of since the day he’d found out about the ‘mortal’ cure. He looked so full of hope as he spoke about it. I wished with all my heart that his dreams would come true, but I knew in my head that life never turned out quite the way you hoped.

I tried not to sound like too much of a kill joy as I poured cold water on his excitement. “But it may not be possible Mick. Maybe there is no permanent way back?”

He didn’t look in the least bit deterred. “But Beth,” he said, picking up my hand and squeezing it with his own warm one, “…we have to at least try. Don’t we?”

We did have to try. He was right. “But Mick,” I counselled with my sensible head on, “you also have to be prepared for the possibility that it won’t work. That you’ll always be a vampire.” I could almost see the light fading from his eyes as I said it. “You have to accept that’s what you are, and most probably always will be….” 

I felt awful now at the look of consternation on his face. “But I fell in love with Mick the vampire, and whether you can make it back to human or not, I will always love you. Vampire or man. It’s Mick I love. Not what you are.”

He looked at me then with a look so full of love I felt almost bathed in the warmth from it. “Ditto Beth Turner. Woman or vampire.”

We exchanged a knowing look and I grinned, my mood suddenly lighter. “Woman or Werewolf even?” I suggested.

He grimaced in mock disgust. “Well… I wouldn’t go that fur..."

Giggling at his terrible pun, I steered the conversation back to the subject at hand, my thirst for information nowhere near satisfied.

“Anyway…” I said, drawing circles on his chest with my left hand, “..going back to the lab…won’t Lance be likely to find out about what’s going on?”

“It’s at a secret location somewhere on the outskirts of Escondido. Even I don’t know where it is.” He gave me a sidelong glance. “The less people know about it the better.”

“So what about Coraline?” I said, still not quite getting to grips with how easy it had seemed freeing her from her brother’s custody. After all, he’d come all the way from France, a place he apparently rarely left, to track her down and take her back with him. “How did you get her out?”

“Well.....” he looked almost sheepish, “..I had a bit of help from Logan on that one.”

“Logan?” He hadn’t gone with them had he? The kid never left his basement!

Mick noticed the astonished look on my face and quickly clarified. “Hacking help that is… from his basement. He hacked into the security system protecting Lance’s mansion and used some kind of algorithm to decode and deactivate the alarm system.”  
He chuckled. “I just had to call him Lando Calrissian for the duration!"

I snorted. Logan was such a geek, but his knowledge of all things digital was invaluable at times.

He wanted to call me Han Solo, but I drew the line at that...." he rolled his eyes, "next thing you know, we'd have been calling Lance 'Darth Vader', and well..." he paused, screwing his face up comically, "...that's just plain silly..."

I grinned from ear to ear, sneaking my hand under the duvet and running my fingers down Mick’s firmly muscled stomach. “So.....what would I have to do to get you to agree to call me Princess Leia then?"

Mick shot me a considering glance. "Maybe get a couple of daft looking side buns?" He suggested innocently.

I narrowed my eyes. "Maybe I'll just do that."

He laughed, reaching his hand over to pick up a lock of my hair and running it through his fingers, his eyes smouldering into mine all the while. "You'd still look adorable."

"Let's find out!" I teased, throwing back the bed covers and making a dash for the bathroom. "I think I'll try it out at the party tonight!"

Turning back as I reached the door I couldn't help but think that he looked pretty adorable too, with his mouth hanging open in surprise and a look of horrified trepidation on his face.

………………………………………

 

Three hours later I was standing in front of the mirror, adding the final touches to my make up and wondering why it was that men seemed able to do nothing more than throw on a fresh shirt, smart suit and shoes, and brush their teeth in order to be ready to go.

I smoothed my hands over the soft crinkle voile of my dress, marvelling at my luck in finding such a beautiful dress. The light material was cinched in at the waist by a wide black satin belt and flowed downwards in soft folds that created a rippled effect at the bottom. Pin tucks and delicate beading on the bodice lent the dress an elegant evening feel, while the small capped voile sleeves gave it a very feminine look.

The colour was a fusion of just about every shade of pink there was, from palest baby pink, through rose, carmine, fuchsia, magenta and mauve, all swirled together in a tie dyed explosion of colour.

As for my hair, tempted as I was to twist it into two cinnamon buns over my ears, just so I could watch Mick's horrified reaction as I descended the stairs, I was far too vain to actually go out looking like I had a pair of giant blonde headphones on. Instead I chose to wear it long, parted on the side and twisted in loose curls around my shoulders. I pinned back one side with a jewelled comb to show off my drop pearl earrings, and added a delicate pink pearl necklace to finish the ensemble.

Adding a touch of Fuchsia Fever to my lips I stood back and checked out my reflection from all angles, finally deciding I was ready to go. Gingerly I tested my high heeled shoes, bouncing a couple of times on the balls of my feet, and was amazed to find my cut seemed to have completely healed. Whatever was in vampire saliva had worked wonders.

Throwing my lipstick in my matching satin pink, snap-top clutch, I made my way downstairs, catching sight of Mick leaning back on the couch, one arm thrown casually over the back, the other clutching a glass of Scotch. He was dressed from head to foot in black. Suit, shirt, tie, socks and shoes, all working together to create a vision of lean, muscled perfection. His foot rested casually over one knee, as he tapped it in time to the music, his fingers drumming out the rhythm on the top of the cushion, and his dark hair, curling just over the collar of his suit, flopped over his eyes as he nodded his head to the beat. Vampire or human, he was simply stunning.

As he heard my footsteps on the stairs, he turned his head towards me, swiftly placing his drink on the table and rising from the couch in one smooth motion, a wide smile spreading across his features as he looked me over from head to toe and slowly back up again.

"Wow!" He shook his head slightly, almost in disbelief. "You look stunning Beth. Absolutely stunning..."

"No need to sound so amazed!" I laughed. Then, looking him over in turn I let out a deep sigh, "And you.... you look..." My voice trailed off for a moment as I considered my choice of words, "...you look..." I tilted my head and regarded him from beneath my lashes, "......like an absolute dream come true."

He blushed, his skin flushing bright red in a way I'd never seen it do before, and his face broke out in an embarrassed smile. He laughed, not looking quite sure how to respond to my compliment, then he stuck out his elbow in invitation and I slipped my arm through his.

Arm in arm, we grinned at each other like idiots and headed out the door.

 

……………………………………

 

Josef had hired a beautiful annexe of the Hotel Arecaceae, situated on the outskirts of Beverly Hills, a luxurious, sprawling, Mediterranean style resort, secreted away under the protection of the surrounding woodland. Tall palms skirted the collection of buildings, lending both privacy and beauty to the enclave.

The main part of the hotel sat atop a shallow incline, exquisitely manicured gardens stretching down and away from the entrance, bordered on either side by citrus orchards and ending at the bottom with a wide lake. The event annexe was set to the left of the main section, joined by a living corridor of climbing vines, hanging with exotic looking flowers.

The doorman greeted us as we entered, checking off our names on an elegant register. As Mick gave our names he frowned slightly at his list looked up at me apologetically.

“I’m sorry to have to ask madam, but do you have any identification on you?”

Mick instantly stepped in, his brows knitting together indignantly as he peered over the doorman’s hand at the list of attendees.

“What’s the problem? Beth’s name is clearly on the guest list.”

“Yes sir, but I’ve already checked her in.” The doorman looked slightly nervously at Mick, but held his ground. “I’ve been instructed to ensure that only listed guests enter the premises.”

“But there must have been a mistake..” Mick protested. “…maybe you checked off the wrong name?”

“Mick…” I put a hand on Mick’s arm. “..it’s fine… I have my driver’s license in my purse.”

As I was handing over my license for the doorman’s inspection, Josef appeared from the hallway beyond, and came over to see what the problem was. The doorman started to explain, but Josef held up a hand and cut him off mid sentence.

“I know they look like troublesome reprobates,” he told the slightly ruffled looking doorman, “..and you’re just doing your job..” he winked at me and gave a quick closed lipped smile, “.. but I can vouch for Miss Turner and Mr St. John.”

“Of course sir.” The doorman swiftly handed my license back and lowered his clipboard, standing back to allow us entry.

Slightly perturbed by the incident at the door, I stepped through the door and into the marble floored hallway beyond, instantly forgetting all about it as I caught sight of Simone heading towards us, a beaming smile lighting up her face as she held open her arms to hug me.

“Beth! I was beginning to think you weren’t going to make it!” She drew me into a quick hug and I caught a waft of a delicious lemon scent from her hair before she stepped back to admire my outfit.

“Pink perfection!” She decided. “You look absolutely lovely Beth. And your bag!” Catching hold of my pink satin clutch bag, she cooed over the ornate metal clasp, adorned with crystal encrusted leaves and flowers. “It’s gorgeous!”

“Thank you!” I laughed. “Happy birthday!” I handed over a gift and card, which Simone quickly stashed away on a table already heaving under mounds of presents.

“I hope you don’t mind if I open it later?” She asked apologetically.

“Of course not.” I assured her, eyeing her lovely outfit.

The gorgeous emerald and acid green Donna Karan dress floated on Simone like a second skin of shimmering silk, ruched at the front and draping to the floor in a gathered V shape. It set off her brunette hair and golden tanned skin beautifully, and with the delicate gold sandals she resembled nothing less than a Roman goddess.

Josef, wearing a black dinner jacket and white shirt, was sporting a green satin bow tie and handkerchief in deference to Simon’s choice of colour. With their outfits each complimenting the others, they looked the epitome of the perfectly elegantly dressed couple.

“You look amazing Simone.” I said honestly. Then, glancing at Josef lounging nonchalantly and effortlessly dashing at her side, with one hand in his pocket and the other around Simone’s waist, “.. and your date doesn’t scrub up too badly either.”

Josef smiled and tipped an imaginary hat in my direction. “Touché blondilocks!”

Pleasantries over, we headed through an arched entranceway, flanked either side by marble columns, to the main hall. The room was an enormous circle, windowed all around, with graceful columns set at intervals at the outer edges. Tables, beautifully set in roman style, were arranged all around, leaving an open area at centre of the room, where guests were currently mingling, as waiters and waitresses carried trays of champagne through the crowd. On the far side of the room was a raised staged area, where, slightly incongruous to the Roman theme, an orchestra was playing 1940s style swing and jazz.  
It all looked at the same time both stunningly earthy and stylish, reminiscent of an outdoor courtyard fit for royalty.

“It’s absolutely breathtaking.” I told Simone as we took our seats at the table. “What a beautiful place!”

Mick and Josef were dutifully fetching drinks for the four of us, and I could see Mick gesturing toward the orchestra with an appreciative smile on his lips as they made their way back to the table. Having dropped off our drinks they set off again in the direction of the buffet and Simone leaned over to show me her birthday present from Josef.

“I’m not sure whether to take this as some sort of message.” She said, looking unsure and holding out her necklace to show me. “Maybe I’m just reading too much into it?”

Swinging from the chain was an exquisite antique gold key, the top of which was shaped like a heart. Intricate engraving decorated the surface of the heart and it was encrusted with tiny glittering diamonds. 

I studied it enviously “It’s lovely.” I said, turning it over in my fingers. “Key…heart….”

My eyes met Simone’s and I raised my eyebrows with a questioning smile. “He’s given you the key to his heart?” I suggested.

Simone’s face beamed. “That’s kind of what I’m hoping it means.” She whispered shyly, quickly sitting back and clinking her glass to mine as Mick and Josef approached the table, each carrying a plate piled high with assorted nibbles.

“To a great party!” she toasted as they set the food down on the table.

“To a great party!” We all toasted back.

 

……………………………………

 

Two hours later I was taking a well earned rest at the table, and absently nibbling at a piece of delicious bruschetta. I felt mellow, chilled out and more relaxed than I had been in weeks. I’d danced for practically the last hour straight, but now my feet were beginning to ache, and the ball of my foot where I’d trodden on the piece of glass was starting to feel like someone was stabbing a knife through it. I was beginning to wonder if a sensible pair of low heels would have been more practical. Although admiring my lovely pink sandals with the dainty ankle straps and pretty pink flowers adorning the toes, I had to agree that ‘no pain no gain’.

I watched Mick with a mixture of admiration and pride as he spun Simone effortlessly around the dancefloor to the orchestra’s version of Glen Miller’s Chattanooga Choo Choo. Up until a couple of weeks ago I hadn’t even know Mick could dance, but he looked totally born to it, almost Fred Astaire-like with his natural rhythm and debonair style. I almost felt jealous of Simone as she was effortlessly twirled about in his arms, gazing up at him with a huge smile on her face, looking happy and carefree. But I couldn’t be jealous of Simone. She and I were fast becoming firm friends, and I knew with absolute certainty that she was head over heels in love with Josef. You only had to see her face whenever she looked at him to know exactly what her feelings were. Watching Mick and Simone dance together made me feel happy inside, and I was quite content to sit out for a while to catch my breath.

Josef’s arrival at the table broke my little reverie, and I glanced up, smiling at him in greeting.

“Looks just like Prince Charming dancing with his Cinderella, doesn’t it?” He commented, sitting down as his gaze flicked towards the dance-floor in amusement. “I, on the other hand,” he gestured toward his impeccably shod feet, “was blessed with two left feet.”

I laughed at his pretense at modesty. “You so do not,” I told him, “I’ve seen you dance before if you remember? At Sarah’s Sports Arena dedication? And you definitely looked like you knew how to cut a rug then.”

He smiled bashfully. “The lady is too kind.” He retorted, breaking out into a grin. Then, as The Chattanooga Choo Choo came to an end and a slightly slower number started up, he stood up, and with a small bow, held out a hand in invitation. “Would you do me the honour of dancing with me?”

“Why…kind sir..” I replied coyly, silently wondering if kicking off my shoes and dancing barefoot was an option, then deciding it really wasn’t, “..I would be most honoured to accept your invitation.”

Dancing with Josef was an absolute pleasure, despite my feeling like my foot was on fire. He obviously realised I was no expert, and skilfully led and steered me about the floor, nudging me in the right direction with a well placed foot and a push of his hand on my waist at the right moment. I found myself forgetting all about worrying what my feet were up to, and simply followed his expert lead, going wherever his gentle push sent me, and allowing him to draw me back in to his side with a lightly coaxing hand.

To my intense amusement, Josef sang along with the song as we twirled around, and I did my best to hide my smile. Unlike his skilful dancing, his singing left a lot to be desired. But it was lovely to hear nevertheless, and by the time we came to the end of our dance I was grinning broadly at his heroic efforts at the high notes.

"Thank you Beth, that was charming." He brought my hand to his lips and placed a small kiss on the backs of my fingers.

"The pleasure was all mine." I replied honestly, glancing over his shoulder as Mick approached with Simone.

"Shall we swap?" Suggested Mick, handing Simone over to Josef as the orchestra started up again with Moonlight Serenade. 

Despite my aching feet I went willingly into Mick's open arms, feeling over the moon with happiness as he slipped one hand around my waist and the other took hold of mine tightly in his. The warmth of his hand on my back felt almost hot, and his face was slightly flushed from the exercise. Human Mick was going to take a bit of getting used to, but I was so looking forward to falling asleep later tonight, holding his warm body next to mine.

"I love this number," I said, gazing up into Mick's face dreamily, "it's so....." I searched for the right word, "...old fashioned."

"Hey!" He protested teasingly, "this happens to be a song from my teenage years. One day they'll be calling Dashboard Confessional old fashioned you know!"

"Yeah..." I teased back with a wicked smile, "like you know who they are..."

"I know!" He insisted, but rather tellingly not elaborating. "Hey," he said, changing the subject, "did you know that this song was originally called 'Now I Lay Me Down To Weep' ?"

I listened to the clarinet weaving its magical notes around the room, while the saxophones sang their undulating melody in the background, and thought that it certainly didn't sound like a sad song to me.

"I prefer 'Moonlight Serenade' " I decided. " 'Now I Lay Me Down To Weep' sounds so sad."

As the music swelled and the trombones kicked in, Mick's arms tightened around me and expertly he twirled me around and around until I began to feel dizzy in more ways than one. Heaven in that moment was just to be swept away, held tightly and securely in the arms of the man I loved.

As the music drew to a close, Mick pulled me tightly to his chest and pressed his cheek against mine. Warm skin to warm skin, his hand holding tightly to mine, it was as though time briefly stood still. The noise of the crowd receded into a gentle murmur and the sound of the music faded away into the background. The words Mick whispered against my ear as he hugged me tight seemed the only real sounds I could hear.

"I wish this could last forever..."

I pulled back slightly so I could look at him, shocked to see that his hazel blue eyes were gazing back into mine almost desperately.

A sudden rush of emotion hit me as I stared back at him, knocking the breath from my lungs. "Me too." I choked, meaning it from the bottom of my heart. I knew with total certainty that whatever life had to throw at us, I wasn't giving up on this wonderful man. Ever. For a few heart pounding seconds our gazes locked and I had the strange feeling we were looking straight into each other's souls.

I was brought back down to earth by a sharp stabbing pain in the ball of my foot. "My feet, on the other hand...", I glanced down at my daintily, but painfully, shod feet, "...are in complete disagreement and are insisting they want out!"

Mick laughed. "Women and their vanity!" He kissed me lightly on the cheek and started leading us back towards our table. "Come on...I'll get you another glass of champagne and you can kick your shoes off for five minutes."

"Oooh..champagne sounds lovely.." I sighed, "...but if you'll excuse me I'm just going to take a quick visit to the bathroom."

I watched Mick's departing back as he headed off to the drinks table, admiring his lean yet muscular physique, accentuated by the well cut suit, and the way his dark hair curled just over his collar. As he passed by, women's heads turned in admiration, and far from being jealous, I was filled with a sense of pride. I still couldn't quite believe he was mine.

Shaking my head and telling myself not to be such a besotted fool, I grabbed my purse from the table, then set off to find the bathroom.

As I headed down the corridor I was taken aback to see a familiar face heading in the other direction.

Darkest brown hair tumbled in loose curls around her milky white shoulders and a figure hugging sleek black dress accentuated her perfectly curved shape. Her freshly painted lips were blood red, emphasising the paleness of the flawless skin. Elbow length black satin gloves completed the femme fatal look.

Coraline! 

Although I could understand why Josef would have invited her, given that they'd been acquaintances for more years than I'd been alive, I was surprised that I'd not seen her earlier in the evening.

She caught my eye as we neared, glancing in my direction with a cool, self assured look, totally different to the face she displayed in the presence of Mick.

"Beth.." She purred, in a voice that could melt butter. But as my eyes met hers, what I saw in them was not friendly. It was the look of someone who knew they knew something you didn't. A bold, challenging look.

For an instant I felt flustered, disturbed by that look, and I berated myself for still allowing her to hold that power over me. It was as though I was still that small child, cowering and afraid. Terrified I'd never see my mother or father again and clinging desperately to a small brown bear, who offered the only comfort to be found in the frilly pink and white prison that had become my room. 

Except that I'd had a guardian angel. A man who had come to save me. And now he wasn't just my guardian angel, he was the man I loved, and I was the woman he loved in return. I was stronger now, wasn't I?

I took a deep breath, forcing a smile to my lips and nodding slightly in acknowledgement as I tried to keep my voice steady. "Coraline...."

Then the moment had passed. Coraline sashayed past on her way to the main hall, and, breathing a sigh of relief, I continued on to the ladies restroom.

The bathroom was the height of luxury, fresh flowers stood in vases at each corner of the large marble vanity stand and a wooden wall unit held hoards of small white fluffy towels, intended for single use. Every conceivable necessity was artfully arranged in wooden baskets, from handy items like face wipes, hair pins and nail files, to essentials such as towels and tampons. There was everything a girl could possibly need!

I quickly used the toilet then headed to the sink to wash my hands and touch up my make up. Another woman was at the mirror next to me applying mascara and I smiled politely at her as our gazes met in the mirror, at the same time opening up my small clutch bag and taking out my lipstick. As she smiled back I thought she looked vaguely familiar, although I couldn't place where I knew her from. Something else about her also triggered off a spark of recognition in my brain, and I squinted more closely at the dress she wore. A simple sleeveless dress in midnight blue satin, with a lightly pleated a-line skirt, v-necked halter style top, and a pretty silver brooch decorating the faux belt at the waist. I wasn't just surprised to realise I owned the exact same one; I was totally spooked by it. It was an exact replica of the bridesmaid's dress I'd worn at my cousin's wedding two years ago. I was certain she'd said they'd been exclusively designed for the occasion.

"It's a great party isn't it?" She said conversationally as she brushed her long blonde hair, pulling it back at one side to secure it with a pin.

I nodded. "Yes. Wonderful."

With a growing sense of unease, I quickly added a layer of Fuchsia Fever, pursed my lips together and used a tissue to blot the excess. 

"You must really be enjoying yourself tonight? You and your 'man'." She said. The inverted commas she placed around the word 'man' quite obvious to my ears.

"Er..... yeah.... it's great." I replied, beginning to feel more than a little unnerved by the exchange. It sounded like a way too personal comment for someone I'd just met in a bathroom. Throwing the lipstick haphazardly back in my purse I didn't even bother to check my reflection in the mirror, a growing sense of foreboding was telling me to get out of there. Right now. I picked up my purse and turned to go.

As I did so the woman quickly sidestepped into my path and I halted abruptly. A bit startled at her action, my first instinct was to step around her, but as I did so, she once again moved to block my exit.

Looking at her close up for the first time, my eyes were drawn to the jewelry she was wearing, and with a now real sense of impending dread, I knew for certain that the earrings and necklace she wore were not just identical to a set I owned; they were mine.

"Something wrong......Beth?" She asked, her words instilling the cold fingers of dread in the pit of my stomach.

This time I pushed past her to grab the door handle and, with a rising sense of panic, found it locked. Rather pointlessly I found myself rattling the handle just to be sure. As my eyes cast about desperately searching for the key her voice came from behind me.

"I wouldn't bother Beth....I have the key."

I turned to see her holding a finger up as the key dangled enticingly from the chain. I'd barely begun to open my mouth when she forestalled the shout for help I'd been about to let out.

"And don't try yelling for help..." she reached inside her bag and deftly removed a small gun, aiming it in my direction, "...or I might just have to use this."

My heart was starting to pound a staccato beat in my chest as my mind raced like lightning trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

"Who are you?" I demanded, sounding braver then I felt.

She shook her head, a look of bitter disgust distorting her pretty features. Her voice dripped with undisguised hatred. "No.... I didn't think you'd recognise me.... I mean why should you? We've only worked at the same office for the last couple of months." She snorted derisively. "Invisible Amy, that's me."

I stared at her face, and for the first time recognition dawned. I hadn't known her name, but I realised I had seen her, several times. She worked in departmental security, specifically with the collection and destruction of sensitive materials emanating from the D.A.'s office. In short, she bagged up documents and was responsible for ensuring their secure disposal.

"Amy...." I said, trying to placate her, "..yes I do know you. I'm sorry....I didn't recognise you at first."

Her face hardened. "Enough with the pleasantries Beth. We both know you couldn't give a rat's arse about me. I'm just some office dogsbody to you." Her lips curled in a disgusted grimace. "Just a pathetic human..."

My breath caught in my throat at her last words, and thoughts were flying through my head at a rate of knots as I considered the implication of what she'd just said.

"Amy..." I was struggling to find the right words. What to say that wouldn't give away the fact that I knew that somehow she knew I was involved with vampires. "I don't know what you're talking about...?" My words sounded lame even to my ears.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about Beth." Her eyes bored into mine. "Superhuman strength... people who can get knocked down by a car and get straight back up again... Rings any bells does it?"

My mind flew back to that evening a few short months ago when Mick had been knocked down by a car, obviously intent on aiming straight at us. He'd thrown me clear just in the nick of time and we'd thought no-one had seen the incident until Dean Foster had e-mailed me the pictures out of the blue.

My lack of response elicited a triumphant twisted smile from her. "... Oh...?" She taunted. "I see that it does....?"

"What do you want?" I asked resignedly. I knew there was no point in lying to her at this stage.

"What do I want?" She repeated in a deranged tone of voice, and for the first time I saw a hint of madness in her eyes as she stared wildly back at me. "Revenge, Beth." Her arms levelled the gun straight at me as she spoke. "Revenge is what I want."

Revenge? For what? I stared at her, transfixed, icicles of fear staring to drip slowly down my spine as I desperately tried to make sense of the words she'd just spoken.

Quite suddenly, like a light going on in my head, I knew with certainty exactly what she was referring to. I remembered the call I had made to Mick's best friend. The man I knew would do whatever was necessary to protect Mick. The man who wouldn't let morals get in the way of what needed to be done. 'I need your help Josef.' Was all I'd said, and, no questions asked, he'd been at my apartment within minutes. 'The rest of the paparazzi have moved on. Dean won't. He won't stop stalking Mick.' Josef had known exactly what I was asking of him. 

'So what do you want me to do about this Foster character?'

'I thought you could handle it, you know, pay him off or something?'

'You think that'll work?'

'No.'

'Well, then you know how I'm gonna handle it.'

'Mick has protected me, saved me more times than I can count.'

'And you're returning the favour?'

'Just don't tell him we're doing this... '

'I can keep a secret. But as long as you're involved with Mick, and you work at BuzzWire, Mick's secret will always be in danger.'

I'd quit BuzzWire that very same day, and I was shocked to realise that I'd never given Dean Foster another thought until I'd come across his photographs in Ben's office the other day.

"Who are you?" I demanded, a strange calm beginning to descend on me as I realised these could well be my last few moment on Earth. "And why did you break into my apartment?"

"Still trying to pretend you don't know what I'm talking about?" Her eyes took on a demented look as she spoke. "You had Dean killed you bitch!" She yelled.

Adrenalin started to pump through me I struggled for a response that wasn't a downright lie. The truth was that she was right. Was I going to deny it? “I don't know who killed Dean." I stated. It was partially true. I suspected Josef hadn't carried out the deed himself, and I didn't know who he'd hired to carry out the task.

"Don't lie to me!" She practically screamed it. "I heard you! You called in your hitman and asked him to do it! You.... sick... cold-blooded.... murderer!"

Her words shook me to the core as the realisation that she was absolutely right sank slowly into my brain. 'Sick. Cold-blooded. Murderer.' Had I been in the company of vampires so long now that I'd come to accept their idea of justice as my own? How had I managed to convince myself that 'dealing' with Dean Foster in the manner I had known Josef intended was somehow acceptable? As I stared back at her, the awful knowledge of what I had done made me feel sick to the core. How had I not seen it before? Deep in my conscience I'd known it was wrong. Had known Mick would never approve. That was why I'd gone behind his back.

"How do you know all of this?" I asked in a small voice, no longer even trying to deny it.

Unaccountably, her face seemed to crumple at my words, and tears shone in her eyes as the gun in her hands started to shake. "Dean had you bugged." She choked out. "I heard it all..... How?! How could you do that?" She seemed on the point of breaking down and I almost felt sorry for her as I looked at the anguish in her eyes. "How could you kill to protect those...... those........." Her voiced wavered. "Those ... monsters....?"

"They're not monsters.." I replied automatically, without thinking. No. They weren't monsters. Mick would never have done what I did. Was I the monster in all this? "Oh God...... " I uttered, sobs beginning to wrack my body as the wrongness of the whole situation began to overwhelm me.

My legs started to wobble beneath me, and, scared they wouldn't hold me up, I reached out for the marble sink top gripping it tightly to keep myself from falling as I shakily sank to the bathroom floor.

Amy's face was streaked with tears as she followed my passage to the floor with the point of the gun. Then, in an action that mirrored my own, she leaned her back to the wall, and, still with the gun trained on me, slid into a heap on the cold tiles in front of me.

"Dean and I were going to be married..... " She told me matter of factly.

"I'm so sorry....." I somehow managed to meet her gaze as I made my apology. I meant it. The gravity of what I'd done was all too clear to me now. I'd convinced myself I was protecting Mick, but in my heart of hearts I knew it my own happiness I'd been protecting.

"I'm sorry too..." The words were spoken apologetically, but the meaning behind them was clear as she aimed the point of the gun straight at my chest, and with a click, drew back the hammer.

At odds with my dire situation, I suddenly had a vision of Mick the very first time we met by the fountain. The tall, dark, handsome stranger, that somehow I'd know wasn't really a stranger at all. If only it were possible to turn back time to that innocent moment and begin again with the knowledge of how to do it right this time. But life moved inexorably onwards, there was no turning back the clock. I'd very quickly learned my lesson, but it was likely to be the last I would ever learn.

My eyes met Amy's, and, with an eerie sense of calm, I waited for whatever was to come.

Suddenly a loud explosion sounded from the distance, and the floor beneath me rocked with the impact of it. At the exact same moment I felt as though I'd been punched in the chest as the air was knocked from my lungs and time slowed to a strange slow motion in which I saw Amy's eyes widen in apparent shock as she gazed at something on the front of my dress. The gun she'd been holding turned a slow descending circle in the air as a small trail of smoke from the muzzle shimmered upwards toward the ceiling. I watched it, fascinated, as it slowly dissipated into the air.

As the gun hit the floor, bouncing on the tiles, time swiftly caught up with itself, and with a resounding clang, it clattered to a halt on the floor to my left.

There was a ringing in my ears that might have been from the explosion I'd heard, or maybe it was from the gunshot at close range?

As if only just remembering the gun, I became aware of a fire starting to explode inside my chest. Intense, wracking pain, the like of which I'd never known before, paralysed me as I collapsed like a stone onto the hard floor. Transfixed, my eyes slowly followed a spreading river of red liquid as it began to pool on the tile before me.

Ridiculously slowly it began to dawn on me that I was dying. I could see movement from the corner of my eye as Amy staggered to her feet and brushed past me. Could hear her fumbling with the key at the door. As I heard the door open and sound from the corridor began to filter in, I tried to call out, but my voice didn't seem to be working. I tried again, but a weak croak was all I could manage. 

"Mick......."

I was powerless to do anything but lie blinking on the floor, staring at the ever growing pool at my side.

Muffled sounds of screaming drifted through the door and a part of my mind registered dimly that something very bad must have happened. I was breathing very fast. Way too fast. My brain knew that I was hyperventilating, but my body seemed no longer under my control and I was powerless to do anything about it.

My mind started to drift and random thoughts seemed to pop up out of no-where. I thought of Josh as he lay dying, talking about our first date. I'd loved him so much back then. My dog..... his soft fur under my fingertips as I rubbed his belly, wiggling his body happily from side to side. My mom tucking me into bed and kissing my forehead, the comforting smell of her vanilla perfume surrounding me with its warmth. My best friend from school and the stupid songs we'd made up and laughed at so heartily. Mick St. John at the wheel of his old car, smiling at me as he told me he could fly like Superman.....

Stars began to twinkle at the edges of my vision and I struggled to focus. The scene before me seemed to be fading ever dimmer, making the shimmering stars shine ever more brightly against the encroaching blackness.

Gradually, no longer able to see anything but the stars, I watched the pinpoints of light sparkle with a distant fascination. Coherent thought was slipping away and I began to feel like I was no longer inside my own body. The pain, which had been fierce before, was receding, and I was starting to feel an intense drowsiness taking over me.

"Beth!"

The shout reached my ears as though from a great distance, and I tried to shut it out, like a child on a school morning trying to ignore it's mother's wake up call, and pulling the covers a little higher over its head. Don't want to wake up .....

"Beth!" The shout came louder this time, closer and more urgent. Almost against my will I was roused from my torpor.

Abruptly the pain intensified, and I came back to myself with a sickening jolt as I felt strong arms sliding beneath me, lifting me from the hard floor. I whimpered in agony as pain seemed to flood through my whole body, and felt the soft whisper of air over my skin as I was carried outside, cradled tightly against someone's chest. My last rational thought as I dimly registered that someone was saving me was 

'Mick....'.

 

To be continued/………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All comments very welcome - it helps just to know someone is reading!  
> Thank you in advance.  
> Galaxy


	25. Waking from a dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Rating: This chapter 
> 
> Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 25

*2008*

*Beth's dream*

Like struggling up from the depths of a deep ocean, my consciousness fights back to awareness. Piece by piece, limb by limb, I slowly start to feel my body. I seem to be in a half sitting position. Something rough and hard is against my back, supporting me. I try to move, but I seem to have forgotten how. It's so hot here.... the acrid smell of smoke is assailing my nostrils, and I feel I ought to be attempting to get away, but my body feels unresponsive, like lead. It's all I can do just to open my eyes.

When I do, it's bright. Dazzlingly so. I have to squint against the blinding sun, burning white hot, up in the cloudless blue sky. I think I must be in the desert because all I can make out through the shimmering heat haze is mile upon mile of sand and a few small scrubby trees in the distance. Everywhere around me is dry, and barren, and empty, and lifeless. I can almost taste the heat in the air. The only thing stirring is the gentle breeze as it rustles the canopy above my head.

I realise I'm sitting propped against the trunk of a tall tree, cradled somehow by its large roots at the base. How did I get here? Nothing makes sense. I struggle to remember, but my thoughts seem wooly and confused, paralysed like my limbs. My mouth feels parched and I run my dry tongue over the cracked skin of my lips. I'm thirsty beyond belief...

Movement far away catches my eye and my attention is drawn to a shape moving steadily across the dry, brittle sand. It's too far away to see it's shape clearly but it appears to undulate, gently swaying from side to side as it moves. My gaze is transfixed on this one sign of life in the parched, empty sea of sand, and I watch it's progress towards me with hungry eyes.

As it draws nearer I see that it's a snake. It's tongue is flicking in and out. A lightning fast movement as it tastes the air around it. Ever nearer it draws, but I'm not afraid. An idea has taken shape in my mind, and I'm watching it. Waiting for it to get close enough. Within that muscular body I can almost taste the life essence flowing through it's veins, like a cool summer brook on a boiling hot summer's day. Soon... very soon it will be near enough.....

Suddenly I remember I can't move. Panic sets in as I realise it's going to pass me by and there's nothing, absolutely nothing I can do about it.

Unexpectedly a drop of liquid hits my cracked, dry lips from above, and my tongue snakes out to lap it instantly from my skin. It tastes so unbelievably clean and cool and refreshing. My head snaps back to stare up into the upper branches of the tree, searching for the source of this nectar from heaven. Way up high, sparkling in the sunlight, I see another clear, pear shaped, droplet, attached to the underside of a beautiful green leaf. It's bulging, elongating, quivering in the balance. Surely it must spill onto my parched, waiting lips at any moment. I dart out my tongue and open my mouth in eager anticipation, the desperate need to catch that life giving droplet my one and only focus.

I watch transfixed, as the bead of liquid finally separates from the leaf, slowly oscillating through the desiccated air. The thrill of the moment as it finally lands on my waiting tongue feels nothing less than euphoric, and I savour the sweet, wet, globule, pressing it to the roof if my mouth to taste it's coppery tang, before swallowing it down.

Abruptly, from the corner of my vision, my eye catches the movement of the snake as it slithers by close to my side. Before the thought has even fully formed in my consciousness my hand has shot out and grasped the muscular writhing body body in a grip of iron. Surprisingly the snake doesn't attempt to struggle in my grasp, and I use my other hand to lift it's heavy form, eagerly bringing it to my mouth to drink.

My teeth slice through it's thick flesh like a knife through butter, and almost instantaneously I feel it's warm, fresh, blood gushing into my scorched mouth like sweet, cool, ambrosia. I swallow it down like my very life depends on it. Mouthful after sweet mouthful slides down my throat like molten honey, and the more I drink the stronger I begin to feel.

The snake begins to struggle in my grasp and I'm surprised to find it still alive. Reflexively, my fingers tighten around it's cylindrical body, my mouth intent upon drawing it's life force from it's body before it can attempt to get away again.

"Enough!"

The cry sounds distant, as though from another world, not this dry, barren desert. 

Even as the snake begins again to fight in earnest, it's unable to shake my clinging teeth from it's mangled flesh and I'm crushing it's wildly thrashing body with my hands as I greedily attempt to suck every last drop from it's squirming form.

"ENOUGH!"

Louder this time, the voice demands my immediate compliance, and I instantly let go my hold. I can feel the fine hairs on the snake's skin as it slips from my fingers, and I think how strange... The desert seems to be dissolving before my eyes, and, as my hands fall to my sides they alight not upon hot sand, but cool, fine blades of verdure, soft and supple between my fingertips, and I realise I'm laying, not on sand, but on grass.

As a new reality gradually coalesces around me I see that it's now nighttime. A figure is looming over me in the darkness. I can't see their face clearly as it's thrown into shadow by a bright halo of fire. Orange flames licking blazingly upward to illuminate the night sky. For a brief moment they hold me transfixed in their eerie brilliance, as I watch them dance and flicker. Then the memories of the evening's events come flooding back, and as full awareness finally returns, I take a deep breath and scream.......

.  
…..  
.

 

I woke up with a start, to find myself laying on my side, cradled snugly against the body spooned in behind me. Mick's arm was around me, holding me loosely from behind, and in the dimness I drew it more tightly around me, lacing my fingers through his and snuggling gratefully down into his embrace. Relief flooded over me as I realised I'd been dreaming. It had all seemed so real. I closed my eyes and thanked God it was just a nightmare.

My sense of peace lasted only a brief few seconds. Something didn't feel right. Opening my eyes, I looked down at the arm clasped to my chest, and, with alarm, registered the charred and ragged suit sleeve. Tattered remnants of white shirt showed below the sleeve, and a pair of gold cuff links that I was sure I couldn't remember Mick wearing the night before. With growing apprehension it dawned on me that I was in bed still wearing my dress from the previous evening. Then, for the first time looking properly at the hand I was holding, I knew instantly that this was not Mick.

"Beth?" Josef's soft voice came from just behind me.

At the sound of his voice, adrenalin flooded my system in an instant, and all of my senses were suddenly on high alert. An awful sense of sick horror began to creep over me as I lay there, frozen stiff, still clutching Josef's hand to my chest. My eyes started to take in my surroundings, and I saw that we were laying inside what appeared to be an enclosed bed. My head was on a pillow and there was a soft mattress beneath me, but to the sides and above me was what looked like frosted Perspex or glass. Tiny ice crystals frosted the inside and I reached out my hand to scratch a line in the thin covering of ice with my fingernail. Definitely a freezer. Please no.... 

"Beth? Are you okay?" Came Josef's voice again, this time a little louder.

I couldn't seem to speak. My mind was too busy digesting information and trying very hard to reject the conclusion it was reaching. Please let me still be dreaming.... I didn't care if it was a nightmare, as long as it wasn't real....

Panic started to overwhelm me. Please no... please no... please no... This couldn't be happening could it? "Oh my God...... " I whispered.

I felt Josef move behind me as he propped himself up on one elbow, detaching his hand gently from mine and moving it to my shoulder to urge me to turn over.

I refused to move. If I turned over and saw Josef, that would make this real. I didn't want it to be real. This could not possibly be real. I stubbornly resisted his gentle coaxing and stared straight ahead, hoping against hope that at any moment I would wake up from this awful nightmare and find myself snuggled under a warm duvet with Mick.

"Do you know what happened Beth?" He asked softly, his hand gently stroking my arm like he was soothing a frightened puppy.

I blinked rapidly and pinched my arm. It hurt. Oh my God... this wasn't a dream? It was really happening? Memories of the night before came flooding to the surface, hitting me like a slap in the face. Did I know what had happened? I wasn't sure if he was talking about the shooting in the bathroom or what had taken place after. I wasn't really totally clear about last night's events, but one thing I remembered with certainty was that I had been shot. And I hadn't woken up in a hospital ward. I'd woken up here. With Josef. And I felt......... absolutely fine.

No..I amended that. Not fine. Sick... terrified... in shock. There was only one reason I could think of why I should be waking up in a freezer with Josef. Did I feel like a vampire? Was I a vampire? I had absolutely no idea.

"Beth?" Came Josef's worried voice.

"I thought I was dreaming...." I still wasn't completely sure I wasn't.

"But you know what happened?" He repeated gently.

"Yes..." I managed, my voice catching in my throat. "Yes... I think I know what happened."

Finally saying the words seemed to release me from my paralysis, and I slowly turned over to face Josef.

He looked absolutely wretched. Deep lines were etched between his brows and his soft brown eyes, normally sparkling with warmth and humour, looked sunken, tired, and empty. His hair, in comparison to the usual groomed perfection, was in disarray and caked with dirt and dust, his face smeared with smudges of soot. His expensive designer suit looked like it had been dragged through a hedge backwards. What on earth had happened?

"Am I...?" I couldn't seem to bring myself to say the actual word. My voice cracked ".... am I...?"

"A vampire?" Josef finished for me. He held my gaze almost apologetically for a few seconds before replying. "Yes.... " He looked like he was fighting not to cry and it was scaring the hell out of me. "I'm so sorry Beth.." 

Sorry? So sorry for what? Instantly my thoughts turned to Mick. What had happened last night and why wasn't he here with me? If it were possible to feel any worse, then I instantly did.

"Josef..... " I asked, my voice trembling. ".....is Mick here? What happened last night?"

He didn't answer me straight away, just looked at me, his warm brown eyes shiny with unshed tears, struggling to maintain his composure. The seconds ticked by, and as I stared back at Josef's anguished face, a knot of despair was tightening in my stomach.

"Josef... please... where's Mick?" I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer.

"I don't know Beth.." He shook his head, his voice cracking, "I really don't know..."

Don't know? "What do you mean you don't know?" I asked. "How can you not know ... ?" My question came out more harshly than intended, and I saw him flinch slightly in response.

"Beth, I ....."

Whatever else he'd been about to say was cut off abruptly as an overwhelming urge to throw up came on me as though out of nowhere. "Jos...!" I clapped a hand over my mouth, trying to sit up and banging my hand frantically on the lid still enclosing us. To my shock and surprise the glass lid cracked and my hand punched a hole straight through.

Josef grabbed my arm and pulled it back, at the same time reaching over and flicking a switch that released the lid.

"Jos...ef!" Beginning to retch, I shot him a panicked glare. "Bath....ugh...room...NOW!" Please don't let me throw up all over him.

I practically threw myself over the edge of the bed, looking around frantically for a door that looked like a bathroom. Running towards the first door I saw, I was pulled back with a jolt as Josef grabbed my hand and steered me quickly towards the other end of the room.

"Much as I'm sure you'd love to vomit all over my best Armani suits, the bathroom is over here." He said, propelling me through the door in the direction of the toilet. I practically fell to my knees and threw my head into the porcelain bowl, my stomach heaving as I brought up what felt like it's entire contents in a series of body wracking ejections.

Clinging weakly to the seat, I stared into the bowl, waiting for the next wave of sickness. "Is this supposed to be happening?" I asked feebly.

Josef came to stand beside me, gathering my hair into a loose ponytail to keep it out of the way. With a wry sense of amusement it reminded my of my best friend doing the exact same thing the first time I drank wine after the school prom.

"It's just your body's way of getting rid of what it can't now absorb." He stroked my hair back soothingly. "I vaguely remember the same thing happening to me."

"Oh God..." I breathed, heaving as another bout of sickness overwhelmed me.

At last it seemed there was nothing left in my stomach to come back up and I sat back weakly, wiping a shaking hand over my mouth as Josef pushed the flush and helped me to my feet.

"This isn't what I'd expected being a vampire to feel like." I said, making my way over to the basin to rinse my mouth.

"It gets better. I promise." Josef handed me a towel as I looked up into the mirror.

To say that my appearance shocked me was an understatement. My skin looked white as a sheet. Last night's make up stood out starkly against the sickly pale background, the remains of the fuchsia lipstick now smeared like an ugly pink gash across my mouth. My hair was matted with dried blood on one side, and my once beautiful dress was tattered and torn, a large brown stain covering the whole front of the bodice where the bullet must have entered. I had a sudden flashback of Mick telling me how amazing I had looked last night. How quickly things change...

"Josef.." My eyes met his in the mirror. ".. what did you mean when you said you didn't know where Mick was? He's not...." I paused, not even wanting to think what I was imagining, let alone say the words out loud, "...he's not...." I choked over the last word. "..he's not...dea..."

"No." Josef interjected before I could finish. "I don't think so Beth, but I can't be certain." The look of sorrow written all over his face didn't help convince me. "It was total chaos last night after the bomb went off.."

"Bomb?!" I interrupted him, fear beginning to clench a knot in my stomach. "What bomb? What happened?" I was staring to feel sick with fear.

Josef moved towards me to take my hands. "I'll tell you everything I know Beth, but first let's get you cleaned up.."

"No!" I snatched my hands away from his. "You have to tell me now Josef! Mick was human .... he couldn't have.... oh my God..." My mind was racing like lightning thinking of all the possible reasons he wasn't here with me right now. Mick would never have left me alone unless something dreadful had happened to him. He was my guardian angel.

"Beth..." Josef began again.

Before he could get another word out a sharp pain ripped through my stomach and I doubled over in agony. Beginning to realise that my body was about to go through another, more embarrassing round of expelling it's contents, I practically screamed at him. "Josef....GET OUT!"

When he didn't move, I physically pushed him backwards towards the door. "I need some privacy. NOW!"

He took the hint and swiftly exited, closing the door behind him on his way out. "I'll be right outside if you need me."

..............................................................

Ten minutes later, my humiliation complete, I opened the door feeling for all the world like an empty shell of skin and bone. I'd always imagined that being a vampire would feel powerful, strong and vital, but all I felt was weak, embarrassed and pathetic.

Josef was sitting on the edge of the bed, bent forward, cradling his head in his hands. He looked up as I came out of the bathroom.

"Feeling better?"

"I think so...." I replied, not at all sure that I was. "Is it normal to feel this awful when you've just been turned?" I sat down on the edge of the bed beside him, grateful to take the weight off my wobbly legs.

"Sorry..." He glanced at my apologetically. "I should have warned you, but my memory's a little hazy after four hundred years.."

"It's okay.." I glanced at the pile of shattered glass to the side of the bed. "I'm sorry I broke your bed."

Josef snorted. "Now there's a sentence I never in a million years expected to hear from your lips..."

Our eyes met, and despite the awful situation I couldn't help but laugh. It was either that or cry. But as I looked at Josef, sitting there looking every bit as miserable as I felt, my face started to crumple, the laughter turned into tears, and soon I was bawling like a baby.

Josef scooted over and put his arms around me, and I buried my head against his shoulder and cried my heart out until there were no more tears left to cry.

"I'm sorry..." I blubbered.

"What for?" He stroked my hair. "You didn't ask for this."

I sat up and wiped the tears from my face. "For being so pathetic." Although even as I said the words I knew that wasn't really what I meant. Sorry for asking you to 'handle' Dean Foster... sorry for putting you in a situation where you were forced to save me. Sorry for being so selfish....

"Strong-willed.... stubborn.... obstinate maybe?" He smiled. "Never pathetic."

"Josef, what happened last night?" I asked, the need to know taking precedence over everything else.

He let go of me, and put his head in his hands once more, running his fingers anxiously through his ash covered hair, before finally looking up at me, a pained expression on his face. "It was awful Beth..." He cleared his throat, obviously having difficulty speaking, "... one minute the party was in full swing, people were dancing and enjoying themselves, the next there was an explosion and all hell let loose." He looked down and paused.

Just when I thought he wasn't going to continue, he looked up, staring into the distance as though he was seeing the events of last night as they took place. "There was a deafening bang... what felt like an earthquake... then one of the columns collapsed. The whole room was suddenly filled with smoke, dust and flames. It was total confusion. People started running in all directions, screaming... "

"Was anyone killed?" I was imagining that beautiful Roman hall, destroyed and in chaos.

"Um.... " His voice was hoarse as he struggled over his words. He looked away for a moment, then turned back to me. "Um... I think maybe two or three people died..." He swallowed. "... most managed to get out... lots of injuries though."

"What about Mick?" I held my breath.

"He was over by the orchestra when it happened.... he was talking to one of the trumpet players.... " Josef glanced up at me, "...I think he'd gone to request a song..." His voice trailed off.

I didn't want to ask my next question, but I had to know. "And afterwards... ?"

He cleared his throat again. "I .... I saw him fall.." He blinked rapidly, holding back tears that were springing to his eyes. "But... um.... but when I finally got to where I'd seen him last, he wasn't there..."

"He wasn't there?" I repeated stupidly, hope starting to rise up in me.

Josef visibly gathered himself and sat up straight. "No. He was just.... gone..." He turned sad eyes to me, "... and I've not seen him since."

"Who on earth would plant a bomb at a birthday party?" The instant I asked the question I realised I quite possibly knew the answer.

"I can only guess that it has something to do with this whole 'Hemera' situation?" He looked at me pointedly. "Do you know who shot you?"

I paused, feeling sick inside. "It was Dean Foster's girlfriend." My voice was barely above a whisper.

At my words, Josef looked like he'd just taken a punch in the gut. He gasped audibly and closed his eyes for a few seconds. When he opened them again, they were shuttered, his expression blank.

"Josef?"

He didn't answer, but instead rose up and began to pace the floor purposely. I could almost see his mind working as he strode back and forth repeatedly across the carpet.

"Josef?!" His lack of response was beginning to worry me. "What are you thinking?"

He glanced at me, continuing to pace, clearly deep in thought. "It's all beginning to make sense now... but where's the connection with the D.A.'s office?"

I realised I'd never had a chance to tell him. "She worked there. I didn't even recognise her until she told me.."

"Did you get her name?" Josef fired back at me.

"Amy..." I frowned, trying to remember, "I'm sorry.. I don't think I got her last name."

"Beth.." Josef was anxiously fishing about in his pockets as he spoke, "... damn! Where is my cell phone?" He looked at me apologetically. "I need to make a phone call. Will you be all right on your own for a few minutes?"

I nodded, grateful for the chance to be alone with my thoughts for a while.

"Stay here. I'll be right back." He promised.

As soon as the door was shut I lay back on the bed and closed my eyes. I thought back to the moment in the hotel bathroom just before I'd been shot, and realised that the sensation I'd felt of the floor shaking beneath me must have been the moment the bomb went off. I thought of Mick in the main hall and tried not to imagine him being crushed beneath the falling pillar. Had Amy been responsible for that too? I didn't want to think about it. It made me feel sick to the core to think I may have been the cause of Mick's ..... I couldn't even think the word. He had to be alive! Surely Josef would have found him if he'd been injured or killed?

I covered my face with my hands and rolled over face down on the bed. I wanted out of this nightmare. I wanted to turn back the clock and start again, undo the wrongs and erase the consequences in the process. Why hadn't I just told Mick about Dean Foster? Why had I been so selfish? If it turned out that my actions had resulted in Mick, and anyone else, getting hurt or killed, how was I ever going to live with the guilt? Please let him be alive. Please.

I don't know how long I lay there, feeling sorry for myself and wishing I could will myself into oblivion, until a sharp knock on the door brought me back to reality with a jolt.

"Beth?" It was Josef's voice. "Is it okay to come in?"

I rolled over and quickly swung my legs over the side, not wanting him to see me in the state I was in. Wiping my eyes and straightening my dress, I called out, trying to keep my voice normal. "Come in Josef."

He opened the door slowly, popping his head around the door before stepping inside. Taking a seat on the bed next to me, he got straight to the point. "I've got people on it." He looked at me with steely determination in his eyes. "If she wants a war, she's got one." 

It was on the tip of my tongue to beg him not to do anything rash. I didn't want any more blood on our hands. Dean Foster may have started it with the blackmail, but he certainly hadn't deserved to die, and I almost felt deserving of the revenge Amy had served upon me. But seeing the look in Josef's eyes, I knew this wasn't my decision to make. Josef would fight tooth and nail to preserve the secrecy of vampire society, and there wasn't a thing I could do to stop him.

I lowered my eyes and stared into my lap, my thoughts turning back to Mick. "Josef, you said you didn't think Mick was...." I still couldn't bring myself to say the word. "What makes you think that?" I asked, raising my eyes to his hopefully.

He considered for a moment. "I don't really know...but ever since I re-turned Mick, there's been a connection of sorts. I can't really explain it and I've no idea whether he felt it too.... if he did he never spoke of it.....but I think I'd know if ......" He paused, clearly not wanting to say the words either. "... if something had... 'happened' to him."

It wasn't much, but even a feeling was better than nothing, and I clutched onto Josef's words desperately.

"We need to find him." I said, standing up.

" 'We' don't need to do anything Beth." Josef shot me a warning look. "If you think I'm letting you loose in the outside world before you've learned how to control yourself, think again." 

"But..."

Josef interrupted me. "I will do whatever I can to find out what happened to him. You will stay here until I say you can leave."

Taken aback by Josef's commanding tone of voice, my hackles went up instantly. "Who do you think you are, telling me what I can and can't do?!"

He stood up, his eyes boring into mine, and I could almost feel the energy bristling from him as he spoke. "Your Sire Beth." He paused for a second to let the words sink in. "Your Sire is who I am. And, as such, it's my responsibility to make sure you don't go on a rampage and start slaughtering every human in sight. You will do as I say until such time as I'm convinced you can control yourself. Then, and only then, will you be allowed your freedom. Now sit down!"

Stunned at his words I sat back down immediately, wanting to defy him but somehow feeling compelled to comply.

I glared up at him defiantly and his look in return was challenging me to disobey. When I didn't move, he sat back down next to me and we sat in silence for a few moments digesting what had just happened.

"Is this how it's going to be then?" I asked, staring at the floor angrily. "You giving the orders and me obeying?"

"Beth..." He reached his hand towards my face and I shook it off furiously, continuing to glare stubbornly at the carpet. "It doesn't have to be like anything... it's whatever we make it. But you must understand I can't just let you loose until you've learned to control yourself."

He was right. I knew he was right. But how could I just do nothing knowing that Mick could be hurt... or worse? My anger dissipated as quickly as it had flared up.

"But I don't feel anything... should I? I don't know what I'm supposed to feel like." I could feel tears starting to threaten again, and tried to blink them away. "Should I be hungry for blood? I don't feel any different." 

"Beth..." He reached for my hand, squeezing it reassuringly, and this time I didn't pull away. "It's going to be okay. One thing at a time.. I can assure that that once the bloodlust kicks in, you'll know all about it. It doesn't happen straight away, but it will happen, and I don't want you to be on your own when it does."

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.

"Why don't you go get yourself cleaned up?" He suggested, indicating the ensuite. "There's a clean bathrobe in there and I'll find you some fresh clothes to wear when you're finished." He looked me up and down appraisingly. "Size six?"

I gave him a small smile, aware he was attempting to flatter me. "Eight please."

"Eight it is." He stood up and walked over to the nightstand, opening the cupboard to reveal a small refrigerator, and taking out a flask and glass. Setting them down on the top he turned to me meaningfully. "If you get thirsty before I get back, you know where it is."

Warily, I looked at the flask, easily able to imagine it's contents, but not over eager to have my suspicions confirmed anytime soon.

He made towards the door. "I'll be back shortly." He looked at me pointedly, "Please do as I asked and don't try to take off."

I gave an almost imperceptible nod, and he turned to leave.

"Josef..."

He stopped with his hand on the door knob and turned back to face me.

"Thank you."

He smiled. "You're welcome."

..........................................................

When I finally emerged from the bathroom, clean and refreshed, wrapped in an oversize fluffy white bathrobe, Josef was just finishing changing the bed sheets.

"Don't you have 'people' to do that?" I asked, surprised at the sight of Josef carrying out a domestic task.

He eyed me speculatively. "No-one that I'd be willing to sacrifice to a newly turned vampire, no."

I started in surprise. Did he really think me capable of that? I felt odd... different... but I certainly didn't feel like I was about to attack anyone.

"Besides, it's nearly eight o'clock in the evening and even I don't force my staff to work that late.."

"Eight o'clock? In the evening?" I'd thought it was more like eight in the morning. I went over to the heavy drapes at the window, and pushed them aside, looking, in surprise, out into the shadowed darkness of the grounds outside.

"I slept for a whole day?"

"More or less..." He shrugged. "You were out like a light once you'd sucked me dry.."

"Oh my God...! I sucked you dry?" I was aghast.

"Well... not quite, but you had a pretty good appetite." He smiled.

I thought about my dream and the writhing, struggling snake I'd crushed without a thought, in my overwhelming need for it's lifeblood. I looked at him apologetically. "I'm so sorry Josef..."

"It's okay... at least I knew it worked this time." He regarded me sadly.

Oh my God... I'd not thought of Sarah. Josef must have felt sick that I'd come through while his beloved Sarah was still stuck in limbo somewhere between the two worlds.

"What exactly happened last night Josef? How did you find me?" I frowned, trying to recall the events after I'd been shot. "It was you who found me wasn't it?"

"Yes, it was me." He paused, smoothing a pillowcase before throwing it onto the bed. "I'd been looking for Mick..... " He paused, a pained expression on his face, "...I hadn't been able to find him... The place was on fire by that time. I was in the corridor, heading outside, when suddenly I caught the scent of your blood."

"My blood?" I was confused. "How did you know it was me?"

"Your foot? Remember?"

Of course, how could I forget that weird moment? I think my brain had tried its best. "Oh... of course.."

"A vampire never forgets the scent of blood they've tasted. Especially not one as rare and delicious as yours."

"My blood was delicious?" Mick had never mentioned that it was any better than any other person's.

"It was." He confirmed.

"I remember feeling like I wasn't in my body any more...." With a shiver, I remembered the out of body sensation I'd experienced, laying on the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, ".... then the pain when you picked me up.... it was unbearable..."

"You were literally a hair's breadth away from death Beth... if I'd been any later I really don't think you'd have made it."

"So what happened next?" I had a morbid fascination to know all the gory details.

"Well... I carried you outside into the grounds, and headed though the orchards to a spot where we couldn't be seen. It only took seconds at the speed I was going." He paused, smoothing down the coverlet and coming over to stand with me at the window. "I laid you down against the base of a large oak tree..... there was no need to drain you... you'd lost so much blood already.....and...well... I guess you can work the rest out for yourself?"

"I remember bits of it..." I thought back to the vivid dream. I must have been barely conscious at the time... everything had seemed so totally unreal. Or was it just my subconscious trying to make sense of what had happened? "...at least I think I do? I remember opening my eyes right at the end and seeing flames leaping into the sky."

"That's right.." Josef confirmed. "...the hotel annexe was on fire by then.."

"I don't remember anything after that until I woke up here though?" I frowned, trying to dredge up any recollection of those events.

"You started screaming your head off once you realised what had happened, so basically I had to knock you out to keep you quiet." He looked somewhat apologetic.

"Oh..." I wasn't sure quite how to respond to that.

"After that I drove us back here and got you settled in the freezer. You were out like a light."

"What about Simone?" I realised I'd not even asked how she was.

Josef looked down and for barely an instant I felt an emotion so strong I nearly stumbled, then, as suddenly as it came, it was gone. The silence in the room was deafening. A horrible sense of foreboding began to creep over me. Please don't tell me something happened to Simone.... I couldn't bear it if something had happened to her as well. Long seconds ticked by as the chill fear inside me grew, then finally he raised his eyes to look at me and I almost flinched from the agony they reflected. Grief and anguish was written all over his face. He looked completely heartbroken, lost and alone, and I felt my stomach drop to the floor.

"She...she didn't make it Beth." His face crumpled.

For a moment I just stood there, his words sinking in. She didn't make it.

"Why... why didn't you tell me Josef?" My voice was shaking.

He looked shell shocked standing there. Still wearing the dust covered, ripped suit, he could have just walked straight out of a war zone.

"I thought you had enough to deal with... I didn't want to make it any worse." 

I moved towards him but he took a step back. "Sorry Beth... I think I need to be on my own for a while."

He backed away, looking uncertain. "I won't leave you on your own for long... I just need a little time to..."

I nodded dumbly, at the same time reeling from the news of Simone's death, and appalled that he'd felt the need to keep it from me.

He turned around and walked slowly to the door. "I'll....um.... I'll.... be back...." He shook his head and left without another word.

With that he closed the door and I was alone.

.................................................

For a long time, I simply stood where I was, my mind in shock over the devastating news of Simone's death. I couldn't believe that Josef had kept it from me all this time. He must have been feeling terrible, and all I'd done was barrage him with questions about Mick. Pulling back the drapes I rested my head against the cool window pane and stared unseeingly out into the night. This was all my fault. The bomb going off at the party. Simone's death. Mick's disappearance. Josef having to turn me. Not to mention that he was now saddled with the responsibility of a newly turned vampire, while at the same time having to deal with the death of the woman he loved. I closed my eyes, feeling tears start to burn behind my eyelids, then cursed myself for my own self pity when I'd been the cause of it all. I would not cry. I didn't deserve to cry.

I thought of Mick, hoping against hope that he was okay. Not knowing what had happened to him was driving me crazy, but I had to cling on to the meagre bit of hope that Josef's 'feeling' was right. But even if it was, what would Mick think of me when he found out what I'd done? Would he even want to be with me? I didn't think so. It would have been better if Josef had just left me to die. Then I wouldn't have to deal with this awful guilt that was eating me up. 

The tears I'd been trying so hard to hold back began rolling down my face. I couldn't even be bothered to wipe them away, and they dripped from chin unchecked. I gave myself up to the overwhelming grief of it all and cried my heart out, my hands spread out against the windowpane, clutching desperately at the empty air.

I've no idea how long I stood there. Long after my tears had finally dried into salty tracks on my face, my mind had drifted off into a state of shutdown. Just a numb nothingness like everything had simply stopped. 

A voice at my shoulder startled me back into the real world. I'd not even heard him enter.

"Beth... are you okay?" Josef sounded concerned.

I turned to him slowly. No... I was definitely not okay. I couldn't seem to shake of the paralysing stupor that had settled over me. Maybe I didn't want to.... Not thinking was good..... I simply stared at him dumbly, still lost in a world of my own.

"Beth?" 

He touched my shoulder and the contact seemed to break me out of my reverie. "I'm okay Josef." I answered woodenly.

"Liar." He said.

There was a pause as we just looked at each other for a moment.

"I"m so sorry...." I started.

He held a hand up, cutting me off. "Beth... can we not talk about it please.."

"But...."

"Beth... PLEASE!"

He looked distraught, and immediately I dropped back into silence, withdrawing into myself, not knowing what to say or do.

"Beth... " his tone was softer this time. "... can we just concentrate on teaching you what you need to know to be able to control yourself.... then we can start to get to the bottom of whatever the hell is going on.." He looked at me pleadingly.

I nodded. "Okay."

"Okay." He looked relieved.

He looked much better than he'd been earlier. He'd showered and changed, his hair still slightly damp, and I caught the fresh, woody scent of his cologne as he walked past me to the night stand, where he retrieved the untouched flask of blood and glass he'd taken out of the cupboard earlier. Heading for the window seat and sitting down, he gestured for me to join him.

I eyed the flask warily, wondering if he was going to force me to drink it. I really didn't want to. In fact I wasn't feeling hungry at all. Just empty. Maybe there was something wrong with me? Was I supposed to be craving blood by now?

"Beth.." He patted the seat beside him. "...there's nothing wrong with you.."

This wasn't how it was supposed to be though. I didn't want to be a vampire if Mick wasn't one with me. What was the point without him?

"I'm sure Mick will turn up soon.." 

My eyes met Josef's sadly. He might..... but even if he was okay, was he even going to want to speak to me when he found out what I'd done?

"Are you worried about him finding out about Dean Foster?" Josef fixed me with a questioning look.

Had I spoken the words out loud? I might have been mistaken, but I didn't think I had.

"Are you reading my mind Josef?!" It was like he was answering my unasked questions. Was there some kind of Sire/Turnee link that allowed him to read my thoughts? I hoped to God there wasn't.

Josef did a double-take, frowned, then shook his head. "Beth.. I can assure you, I cannot read your mind."

I buried my face in my hands. Was I going mad? I didn't want to be here. I didn't want to be a vampire. Just the thought of having to drink someone's blood made me feel sick.

"I won't make you drink it unless you want to." He assured me.

"You're doing it again....! " 

"Doing what?" He looked genuinely unaware.

"Answering my thoughts..."

"I'm not...." He shook his head, as if to clear it. "Look... I know you might not think you want it, but you do need to feed, and the sooner you start the better." He looked at me meaningfully, "and the sooner you'll be able to get back into the outside world again."

"Okay..." I looked at him dubiously as I sat down beside him on the couch, "... but aren't I supposed to want to drink it?"

"Trust me," he said, uncapping the flask and pouring a generous amount into the frosted glass, "I think you may find you want to..."

I'd started to recoil at the unwelcome idea of drinking someone else's blood when the sudden sharp aroma hit me and I stopped in my tracks.

The mouth-watering scent assailed my senses, and I felt a sudden sharp hunger begin to tug at my belly.

Taken totally aback, I had the first inkling of the effect that the smell of human blood could yield over a vampire. The only thing I could liken it to was the smell that vinegar evoked when I had shaken it over battered fish. Saliva began pooling in my mouth and before I knew what was happening, I let out a throaty growl, realising too late as I felt two sharp points slice into my tongue, that I'd vamped out.

"Oh my God Josef..." I struggled to speak. That was as far as I got before I snatched the glass from his hands and brought it to my mouth to drink. The feeling of emptiness inside me was begging to be filled, and this, I somehow instinctively knew, was exactly what I needed to fill it. As soon as it touched my tongue I began to gulp at it greedily, savouring the wonderful, sweet taste as it slid down my parched throat. Within seconds I had drained the the glass, and I looked up at Josef with only one thing on my mind.

"More." I said, holding it out to him, and licking my lips.

I suddenly became aware that the lights in the room had brightened to an almost dazzling degree. I blinked, thinking at first that something was wrong with my eyes. Almost instantly though, I realised this was how a vampire saw through silvered eyes. Distracted, momentarily, from the need for more blood, I looked around the room, fascinated by the sparkling colours and vivid intensity of everything I saw. It was as though I'd previously been looking through a blurred camera lens, and suddenly someone had brought everything into a sharp focus. Colours I couldn't even name gleamed from all around the room.

I looked back to Josef, surprised to see that he'd vamped out too. I was instantly drawn to his glowing, arctic blue, eyes. I'd seen him like this only once before, and I only remembered his eyes appearing a dull silver colour. What I was staring at now was the most beautiful colour I thought I'd ever seen. It was like staring into a living, dancing gas flame.

A low growl came from his lips, and almost before I saw him move, he was across the room in a flash, retrieving another two flasks from the cupboard, and returning to stand before me as though he'd never left my side.

"Wow!" I said, impressed, in spite of everything.

He handed me a flask, and within seconds I'd greedily drained the contents, even licking the rim to capture the last few drops.

Josef smiled approvingly, then lifted his own flask to his lips, downing it in three quick gulps, wiping a drop from his chin and quickly licking it off the back of his hand. Almost instantly the burning blue light in his eyes faded and his eyes returned to normal. Although 'normal' wasn't quite what I remembered. With my enhanced eyesight they appeared a jumble of amber, gold and cinnamon.

"I really am a vampire..." I said wonderingly, still not quite able to believe it was true. "Even with everything that's happened... the shooting... the waking up in your freezer... I didn't really believe it.... until now."

"You really are Beth." Josef smiled the first real smile I'd seen on his face all day. "Welcome to the family."

I was silent for a moment, letting the truth of it sink in, then, realising I wasn't changing back like Josef had done, I started to panic.

"Why aren't I going back to normal?" I asked with some difficulty, unused to my new fangs. 'Fangs' ! Had I really just thought 'my' fangs? 

"Sometimes it can take a little time, especially when you're first turned," Josef sounded sympathetic, "but you'll soon learn how to control it. I think for now you'll just have to wait it out."

A sudden thought occurred to me. I'd seen Josef, but what did I look like as a vampire I wondered? Haltingly I walked over to the full length mirror, almost too scared to look, but my curiosity quickly overcame my fear. To my surprise, my eyes, which I had expected to be a glowing blue/white like Josef's had been, were a startling luminous green, flecks of turquoise and yellow intermingled with the intense emerald green. I stood, fascinated, surveying my new face, putting a hand to my upper lip to properly see my fangs. I touched a tentative finger to the tip and quickly jerked it back in surprise as I discovered they were sharp as cactus spines. Raising my eyes once again to the mirror, I saw my own 'normal' face staring back at me, and realised I'd changed back in an instant.

I turned around to face Josef, happy as a child who'd just learned a new skill. "Look! I just turned back!"

Josef smiled. "I guess that's lesson number one completed."

My face dropped slightly. "Lesson number one? What's lesson number two?"

He gave me a closed lipped smile. "Feeding fresh of course."

............................................................

Josef brought me some new clothes as promised, and I had to admit that whoever had picked them out had done a great job, choosing a range of colours and styles ranging from casual to smart casual. Half-heartedly, I'd picked out a comfy pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. I couldn't really see the point of getting dressed when I seemed to be under house arrest. He hadn't actually locked me in, but Josef had made it perfectly clear that under no circumstances whatsoever was I to leave his room until such time as he decided it was safe for me to do so. Naturally that hadn't gone down too well, but I had to accept that he was doing it not only for the protection of the human members of his household, but for my own good too. An out of control, newly turned vampire, was unlikely to last very long in vampire society.

He'd decided, now that I'd fed, that I could be trusted to be on my own for a little while while he took care of some business. I had the TV to keep me company, but knowing that television was unlikely to keep me amused for long, he'd also provided me with several paperback novels, and best of all, the item which was currently resting on my knees, a laptop computer. I was under strict instructions not to communicate with anyone, friends, family, colleagues or otherwise, since to all intents and purposes I was, at least with respect to the human world, considered to be dead.

I'd argued until I was blue in the face. Why could I just not say that I'd survived? But Josef was adamant. Amy was nowhere to be found, and, if whatever organisation she belonged to (and he was sure now that she was not working on her own) discovered that I was fit and well, that would be all the proof they'd been looking for. Josef had enlisted the help of Guillermo at the morgue to secure a Jane Doe who would serve the purpose. I'd not asked the details, but he'd taken my bloodied dress and jewellery and assured me that the pathologist would take care of the rest. There was also the matter of Amy knowing that it was me who had arranged Dean's murder. Even hearing myself think those words made me feel unwell. At the time it had seemed like such a logical thing to do, but now I couldn't believe I'd made the request of Josef so casually. Whether Amy had been aware of Josef's part in the whole thing was unclear. She'd called him my 'hitman' in the bathroom, so it was still possible that his part in the killing was not known to her.

I was having a hard time accepting that everyone I'd known, now believed, or would soon believe, me to be dead. I'd watched the item on the news channel, and, although none of those killed had yet been named, it was only a matter of time. I was horrified to hear that three people in all had been confirmed dead, in what was suspected to be an attack on the head of Kostan Industries. I was one, Simone another, but that meant that someone else, some innocent person, had died because if my actions. The thought sickened me to the core, and not being able to do anything to find out what had happened to Mick was driving me crazy. I knew Josef was deploying every resource possible to find out exactly what threat we were up against, and neutralise it as quickly as possible, what I wasn't so sure about was what he was doing, if anything, to find Mick. My mind was torturing me with the thought that the other 'confirmed dead' may have been Mick, but if Josef knew anything about it he wasn't letting on. I had to believe that he would tell me if he found out any information about what had happened to Mick, but in the meantime that didn't stop my thoughts from running riot.

I'd explored Josef's bedroom from top to bottom, more out of boredom than anything else. Bigger than my entire apartment, it was the most fascinating and beautifully decorated male bedroom I'd ever seen. Like the room I'd stayed in just a couple of days ago, the ceiling was covered in the most beautiful painting. However, instead of vines and blue sky, this one depicted rather voluptuous naked figures, tastefully covered in part by strategically placed billowing ribbons of cloth, all seeming to be frolicking and making merry in a very joyous and free manner. The walls of the room were tastefully decorated with rich and expensive embossed wallpaper, and several oil paintings hung at intervals between the antique dark wood furniture. One picture in particular caught my attention. A tall, slim man wearing a cropped riding coat and dark breeches, tucked into high leather boots, he carried his hat and gloves in one hand, the other holding a riding crop. His hair was long, and his cheeks were covered by the mutton chop style sideburns of the era, but it was unmistakably Josef. I stared for a long time at that picture. Although I had known how old he was, seeing this painting, presumably dating from some time in the late 1700s, I began to understand, for the first time, what it really meant to be a vampire.

There were several antique style, but obviously newly upholstered armchairs dotted about the room, and a large, comfy looking leather couch strewn with a multitude of cushions. In front of one of the tall windows was a wide red quilted sofa. I'd explored the walk in closet that was about the size of my whole bedroom, and discovered that Josef was obviously completely OCD about wardrobe organisation. Shirts, suits, shoes, all arranged by colour in pristine rows. In contrast to the antique dark woods and almost gothic style furniture of the main bedroom, the bathroom was a state of the art, contemporary design of marble and glass, and, as I discovered to my delight, had a whole wall which at the press of a button revealed itself to be a window overlooking a Japanese style garden courtyard below. 

I supposed that as places to be confined in went, there were definitely worse ones than Josef's room. Money might not be able to buy love, but it certainly bought luxury and comfort.

Finally, having thoroughly explored my immediate surroundings, I'd decided that if I couldn't go out, I'd have to be content with doing some investigating via the Internet. Having spent a good few hours surfing the Internet for every little piece of information I could possibly find on Dean Foster, I'd hit a dead end. Aside from hounding celebrities to the point of court injunctions, there was nothing out of the ordinary to go on. I sighed in frustration. In desperation, I started searching randomly for phrases like 'humans against vampires'. I don't know what I'd expected to find, but all that seemed to come up were articles about books and films concerned with vampires and vampire hunters. One article about mythical folklore caught my attention, and soon I was reading about vampire legends from the Balkans and Eastern Europe dating back to the early 1800s. According to the article there had been a period of mass hysteria in Europe, during which time people had actually dug up corpses in order to stake them, and had accused others of vampirism. I could not seem to draw my eyes away from one particular quote, written in his Philosophical Dictionary, by the revered writer and historian of his time, Voltaire

"These vampires were corpses, who went out of their graves at night to suck the blood of the living, either at their throats or stomachs, after which they returned to their cemeteries. The persons so sucked waned, grew pale, and fell into consumption; while the sucking corpses grew fat, got rosy, and enjoyed an excellent appetite. It was in Poland, Hungary, Silesia, Moravia, Austria, and Lorraine, that the dead made this good cheer."

I stared at the words on the page as if transfixed. If I'd read those words a week ago, that all they would have been. Now the words seemed to burn themselves into my brain, accusing, reviling, and taunting me. No matter that so far I'd tasted only bottled blood, I was now one of these vile creatures being denounced and stigmatised. Had these legends been borne out of real encounters with actual living vampires? Vampires the like of those I knew, and loved?

Aghast, I threw the laptop onto a pile of cushions at the other end of the couch I was sitting on, as though in throwing it away I could disassociate myself from the repugnant creatures being described in the page. But I continued to stare at it, even when the tears started to prick behind my eyelids, and blurred my vision. I didn't need my eyes, my mind was busy conjuring pictures of bloated pale creatures cruelly draining the lifeblood of the innocent humans they preyed upon. Was this really what I had now become?

"Beth?"

The knock on the door was a welcome distraction from my morbid thoughts. I knew it would be Josef. He'd promised he'd be back just before sunrise, and I could already see the sky starting to lighten at the bottom of the heavy drapes.

"Come in Josef", I hastily wiped at my eyes and got off the couch attempting to pull myself together before he caught sight of me.

He looked drained as he walked in, his complexion even paler than normal, his shoulders slumped. Throwing a roll of duct tape on the bed, he headed for the couch without giving me more than a cursory glance, sitting down heavily and resting his head back against the cushions as he massaged his furrowed brow.

I regarded him for a few seconds, desperate to ask after any news of Mick, but aware that it would be a very thoughtless and selfish thing to do under the circumstances. So the question I wanted to ask teetered unspoken on the tip of my tongue.

Finally opening his eyes, he looked up at me, and I realised he looked totally wiped out.

I went to the concealed fridge inside the nightstand cupboard, and took out a flask and glass, wordlessly placing them on the low table in front of him.

Sitting up, he poured himself a glass and downed it in one. "Thank you Beth," he sighed gratefully.

"You're welcome." 

We were silent for a few moments, then Josef noticed my abandoned laptop still resting amongst the cushions. "What the hell are you reading about Beth?" He frowned, picking it up and reading the passage I'd been looking at earlier.

"I was.... I was just.... just doing some research." I stuttered, embarrassed at being caught Googling 'Vampire' like it was really the mystical folklore humans believed it to be, rather than the reality of my own life right now.

"Voltaire..." The name dripped from Josef's tongue almost lovingly. He glanced up at me in amusement. "You know I met him once, not long before he died. I'd gone to see one of his new plays and he just happened to be attending.." He was smiling, obviously lost in a good memory, "... he was a very wise man you know.. I feel honoured to have met him." Closing up the laptop, he placed it on the table in front of him, "I'm pretty sure he never believed in vampires though... at least not the sort that all the debate was about..." He raised his eyebrows, shrugging slightly. "Shame really, as he would have made a great one."

I looked down, wondering if this was a good time to ask my question. I really couldn't hold off any longer.

"Josef... is there any news about Mick?" I couldn't keep the note of desperation out of my voice.

He spared me a sympathetic glance and shook his head slowly. "Sorry Beth...I've checked every place I could think of.. his loft....every hospital in the vicinity... every police station... the D.A.'s office..... the morgue..." He shrugged helplessly, "...there's just no sign of him. I don't know where else to look..."

I really hadn't expected Josef to have found him. I knew he would have told me straight away if he had any news, but still I felt the disappointment hit me sharply.

"The police havn't found anything though. No watch, no jewellery....no anything.." He spread his hands in a gesture of bafflement, "...I just don't know....there would have been something."

Getting off the couch, Josef headed over to the large chest of drawers on the other side of the room, retrieving a pair of grey sweatpants and a t-shirt. "I'm sorry I can't give you any better news right now, but I really I think I'd know if the worst had happened Beth... I can't explain it, but I'm sure he's still alive." He turned back to me, his arms full of clothes and headed for the bathroom. "I'll search again tomorrow... I promise."

He disappeared into the bathroom and I sat on the edge of the bed, lost in my thoughts, my mind formulating new scenarios as to what might have happened to Mick. Had he been injured when the bomb went off? Maybe he'd been taken to hospital somewhere and was lying in a ward unconscious, unable to contact anyone? Josef had assured me he'd checked all the hospitals in the area, but what if he'd missed something? What if Mick had been taken to another county, or even across the state border? I'd no idea what had happened to my cell phone. What if Mick had been trying to call me? What if he was being held captive? Not knowing was literally killing me. I felt like I was going crazy. I couldn't seem to shut my mind off.

I listened to the water running in the bathroom as Josef cleaned his teeth. It only dawned on me then that Josef was getting ready to go to bed. Where was I going to sleep? Could I even sleep now that I was a vampire? I thought of Mick's freezer, bare and empty, sitting in his apartment with no one inside. The thought of sleeping inside a glass box terrified me.

I got off the bed and went over to the pile of clothes Josef had brought me earlier, looking for a nightshirt or a pair of pyjamas. I rifled through the the garments, but could see nothing that resembled sleepwear. Anxiously I checked the pile again, only to come up with the same result. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes again, and cursed myself for crying over such a stupid thing. 

By the time Josef came out of the bathroom I was kneeling on the floor clinging desperately to an armful of clothes and wondering what the hell I was going to do. I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I wanted to get out there and start searching for Mick. I wanted to carry on as if nothing had happened. I wanted not to be a vampire. Panic was starting to rise up in me as I felt trapped in a situation I didn't have a clue how to resolve. Where was I supposed to go? I couldn't stay here with Josef, but I had nowhere else to go. I didn't even have a toothbrush...

"Beth... ?" I jumped as Josef touched my shoulder.

Clinging onto the only belongings I now owned in the world, I looked up at him in desperation. "I don't have a toothbrush...."

"We'll find you a toothbrush," he promised me, his tone soothing and reassuring.

"Or pyjamas...." 

"I can get those too.."

I nodded tearfully, feeling ridiculously grateful for his kindness.

"Beth... I can get you anything you need...you only have to ask." He looked at me earnestly. "Please don't feel like you can't ask. I know I've had other things on my mind today, but I want to be here for you. I promise you we're going to get through this.... together."

I nodded again, even managing a small smile. It didn't last long as my face crumpled again. "I can't do this... "

"Can't do what?" 

"Can't be...." I stumbled over my words, "... I can't be a vampire Josef...." I looked up at him despairingly, ".... not without Mick..."

He sat down on the carpet beside me and bowed his head. Reaching out to take the pile of clothes from me, he set them down on the floor, and took both of my hands into his.

"Beth.. I know you didn't ask for this..." he raised his eyes to mine, "... and I want you to know that I'm sorry for having turned you without your consent..." He paused, waiting for my response. When I didn't answer, he continued his explanation, "I never even gave it a thought... when I realised how close you were to death there was no decision to make... it just needed to be done." He looked at me imploringly. "Can you forgive me?"

"Of course... there's nothing to forgive." Horrified that he felt he'd done something wrong I felt the need to reassure him immediately. I hadn't meant to make him feel bad, it was just so hard coming to terms with everything that had happened. I felt so lost and so alone without Mick, but it certainly wasn't Josef's fault. He'd done what he believed to be the right thing.

He squeezed my hands and nodded, clearly relieved at my response. "Beth...you can do it..." His eyes found mine and held my gaze, "I won't let you fail."

He looked so determined, I couldn't help but believe him. "Okay.." I whispered.

"So.... are you ready for the freezer?" He flicked his eyes over towards the bed.

"I can't sleep in a glass box..." I really was terrified at the thought. "... I'm sorry... isn't there anywhere else I can sleep? A cool room maybe?"

He looked at me sympathetically. "You do need to be in a proper freezer, especially when you're first turned. If you don't keep yourself properly cooled during your sleep time you're likely to start feeling the ill effects of it very quickly. You'll need more blood to compensate, and things can spiral out of control more quickly than you realise."

"Are you going to be with me?" I felt like a scared child during a thunderstorm.

He smiled. "For now... at least until you're comfortable with it and I'm confident of leaving you on your own." He looked suddenly unsure. "You are okay with that, aren't you?"

Relieved that at least I wasn't going to be alone, I started to relax. "I'm good with it..... " my thoughts turned to the hole I'd punched though the freezer lid earlier, ".. but doesn't your freezer bed thingy have a hole in it?"

"Hence the duct tape.." He indicated the roll of silver tape on the coverlet.

I smiled, just happy at least to know that I wasn't going to be left on my own in a box. "Thank God.." I grinned, attempting a joke "... I was worried you were into bondage."

He regarded me with a completely straight face. "That's only on Wednesdays... and I prefer rope..."

............................................................

Joseph had managed to dredge up a spare toothbrush from the bathroom cabinet and I couldn't believe how much better I felt just being able to brush my teeth. As I came out of the bathroom he was just putting the finishing touches to the temporary repair on the freezer lid.

"There...that should be sufficient for now." He cut off the last piece and smoothed it down, pressing the switch that opened up the lid.

I looked dubiously at the freezer come bed. It didn't seem right somehow to be getting into bed with Josef, even if it was technically a freezer.

"Right or left?" He asked courteously.

It was getting weirder by the moment. I shrugged, "I don't mind...just sleep whichever side you normally do.... I'll take the other one." 

"Oh... before you get in though..." He gestured for me to pay attention, "...this is the switch that opens and closes the lid." He indicated a button on the side, situated within easy reach from a horizontal positional on the bed. Then, like an air steward giving a safety talk, he opened his arms to demonstrate. "There's one on each side..."

"And this..." He pointed behind the raised lid to the panel on the headboard, "...this one opens the lid from the outside. Okay?"

"Message received and understood." I confirmed guiltily, giving him a short salute.

"Come on then.." He switched off the overhead light, leaving just the bedside lamps on, and picked up the edge of the comforter, climbing wearily inside.

After a couple of seconds I headed for the other side and did the same. "Do you always sleep under a duvet?" I asked, curious, as I'd always thought vampires slept naked in an empty freezer box.

He turned on his side, plumping the pillows under his head. "Not always, but it's more comforting somehow... and I thought you'd appreciate it under the circumstances."

"I do... thank you." I lay down on my side, leaving as much space as I could between us without actually falling over the edge.

"Do you want the light on or off?" His finger was poised over the switch.

"Do you mind leaving them on?" I couldn't explain it, but even with Josef here with me, I couldn't be inside a box in the dark. It would feel too much like being inside a coffin.

He moved his hand away, reaching down for the switch at the side of the bed. "Scoot in a bit", he advised, "I'm going to close the lid."

I obediently moved over a bit, pulling up the side of the comforter as the lid slowly descended over us, clicking into place with a soft clunk. As soon as the lid was closed a soft hum started up, not intrusively loud, but noticeable nevertheless.

"You'll get used to it." Josef gave me a small smile. "You won't even notice it after a while."

"How cold is it going to get?" Although I'd not noticed the cold at all since waking up the previous evening, I didn't like the thought of getting too frosty.

"Beth.... don't worry about it... you're not going to mind. Trust me." Josef's eyes were starting to droop.

"Josef..." I hesitated, but the need to say something about Simone was overwhelming, "...I'm so sorry about Simone..."

He shut his eyes. "I know..." 

"I..." I didn't get any further as Josef abruptly turned over to face the other direction.

"Josef I ....."

"Go to sleep Beth." The was an edge of finality to his voice as he punched at the pillows once more and pulled the duvet more tightly around him.

Not wanting to face his turned back, I rolled over and tried to get comfortable, feeling suddenly very cold and alone. I wished so badly that Mick was here to hold me. I imagined his strong arms surrounding and holding me, his warm, deep voice telling me he loved me, and squeezed my eyes shut as fresh tears began to trickle down my face. Missing him was like a physical ache inside, and I found myself curling tightly into a ball as I tried in vain to find some comfort.

It was going to be a long night.

.

.................................................

.

*Jacqui Kostan, 2014*

And so began my life as a vampire.

Not at all what I had expected, and certainly one of the lowest moments in my life up until now. It's funny though, how your perspective changes through the years, and looking back at that time now, I'd give anything to be back in that moment again.

Tiptoeing silently to the door, I clicked off the light, then, turning back once more, just to check Evie was still sound asleep, I stepped out into the corridor and pulled the door to behind me.

The house seemed so quiet now. With Josef gone, I'd just wanted to be alone. I'd told everyone to get out and take a couple of weeks vacation. With the exception of Reni, I'd barely spoken to a soul in over a week. Now I wished so badly there was someone here to talk to. Rachael's visit earlier had made me realise how much I needed my friends, and I would have loved to have sat down and poured my heart out to her now. They were hurting too and I treated them so unfairly. I vowed to call them all in the morning, ask them for their forgiveness, and beg them to come back.

In the meantime, it was just me and Evie. And what was I going to tell Evie? She'd grown up believing Josef to be her father. How could I tell her now that he wasn't? Should I leave her to believe what she thought to be true, or should I tell her the truth? She was too young to understand now, but one day I'd have to make the decision. Was it fair not to tell her, when her real father might still be alive?

As I approached the door to the bedroom Josef and I had shared, I hesitated. I hadn't slept there since it had happened and I didn't think I could do so now. But it was time to start facing up to things. Running away wasn't going to get me through this, and I had to start somewhere.

My hand hovered uncertainly over the door knob, then, taking a deep breath, I took hold of it and stepped into the room. Everything was exactly as I'd left it. The evening gown I'd been wearing was thrown haphazardly across the back of one of the chairs, my shoes abandoned on the carpet. It seemed like a scene from a year ago, rather than just a few short days.

I walked over to the window and tugged open the heavy drapes, letting the moonlight stream into the dark room. Staring numbly at the empty room, my gaze alighted on one of Josef's old shirts, laying over the back of a chair. In a daze I walked over to it, lifting it slowly in my hands and bringing it to my face. Burying my nose amongst the folds I closed my eyes, inhaling the woody scent of Josef's cologne, and, more subtly, beneath that, the warm, familiar smell that was uniquely him.

As the sense of loss hit me afresh, I crumpled slowly to the floor, still clasping the one physical reminder of the man I'd loved, like it was the last lifebelt on a sinking ship.

Yes, I'd give anything just to be back there now.  
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.  
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……………….

 

To be continued/………………………

Please review and let me know what you think. I really do appreciate it and it helps just to know that someone is reading!  
Galaxy451


	26. The Girl in the Garden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Disclaimer: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._
> 
> Rating: This chapter NC-17
> 
> **Full Circle - Beth’s Story**
> 
> **Chapter 26**

_*2008*_

I breathed out as far as I could and tried not to think about breathing in again. I noticed, with a detached kind of interest, that the glass, a mere few inches from my mouth, did not fog up from my breath, instead remaining coolly frosted and unchanged.

One...two...three...four....five...six...seven...eight... I counted silently inside my head, trying hard to ignore the almost overwhelming urge to draw a breath. Nine...ten...eleven...twelve..... My eyes were bulging with the effort not to breathe. I felt like I was about to choke. Thirteen...fourteen...fifteen...sixteen... my whole body was screaming out with the need for air. Seventeen...eighteen.... Suddenly, with what came out as a loud strangled gulp, I finally gave up and took in a much needed lungful of air. 

I was a vampire. I wasn't supposed to need to breathe, so why couldn't I stop? I tried again, this time breathing in and holding it rather than breathing out. I managed almost a minute, then, like before, my body just seemed to take over, and I breathed out, quickly gasping in breath after breath, until I fell back into a steady rhythm once more.

Realising I wasn't going to be able to test my theory by holding my breath, I gave up on the not breathing thing and concentrated instead on the beating of my heart. The quietly droning background hum of the freezer was the only noise I was aware of aside from the slowly beating organ within my chest. The more I concentrated on the sound the louder it seemed to become. I could hear the pounding in my ears and the swoosh of the blood moving through my veins. Would it stop if I fell asleep I wondered? I remembered the first time I'd been dozing off to sleep on Mick's chest, my ear pressed to the skin just above his heart, quietly both feeling and listening to it beating. It had gradually slowed until it had stopped completely, and the feeling of overwhelming panic that had come upon me at that point, thinking he had died, had made me shake him awake, only to realise he was absolutely fine. It didn't matter that I knew he was a vampire, my instinct had taken over and reacted as though he were human.

I don't know what I'd expected being a vampire to feel like, but it certainly wasn't at all like I'd imagined. I couldn't help feeling a little disappointed, cheated even. Josef had promised things would get better, and I clung on to the hope that he was right. Feeling the way I did right now, for eternity, was just unthinkable.

The brief experience I'd had with Black Crystal, had, I'd believed at the time, given me an inkling of what it felt like to actually be a vampire. At first, taking the drug had made me feel like the most powerful being on the planet. Like there was nothing I couldn't do. Nothing that was beyond my reach. 

Including Mick St. John.

.................................................................

_Flashback to 2007_

_I'd been doing research on a story about a model who'd died from a drug overdose. A sudden spat of deaths from an unidentifiable drug had the police department baffled. With Mick's help, I'd managed to gain entrance to the elite upper level of the nightclub that was peddling the drug, and met the nightclub owner Lola, a vampire even older than Josef by all accounts. Although the police had raided the place not long after I'd arrived, I'd managed to obtain and secret away a small vial of the drug, known as Black Crystal. A substance I later found out to be vampire blood, obtained through paralysing vampires with silver. At the time though, I was unaware of what the drug consisted of and was trying to identify the possible ingredients. Sitting at my dressing table making a list of how various drugs tasted, my eyes had been drawn to the innocent looking vial hanging from my mirror._

_'What does it feel like?' Lola had said. 'Just once and you'll see.....'._

_As I studied the tiny black crystals it suddenly seemed very clear to me that the best way to find out was to try it for myself. Before I could change my mind I'd taken the vial and opened it up, cautiously dabbing a small amount on my fingertip and raising it to my tongue to taste. Moments after it dissolved, my eyes widened in surprise as I experienced a rush that seemed to set my whole body tingling._

_Against my better judgement I dabbed my finger once again into the dark crystals and tasted it for a second time._

_This time, the effect was overpowering. Almost instantly I felt like I was suddenly in tune with everything, like I could feel everything, and nothing, absolutely nothing could stop me. I glanced in the mirror and was shocked to see the reflection looking back at me didn't seem to be me at all. The mirror image smiled back at me like she was someone else altogether._

_I was filled with confidence, one hundred percent certain of my ability to do anything I wanted. Nothing could hold me back. I felt like I could rule the world if I wanted to. But that wasn't what I wanted. What I wanted was Mick._

_Mick St. John. The man I was trying very hard to tell myself was just a friend, a colleague, a guardian angel even. In reality though, he was so much more than that. I'd been attracted to him from the moment we met, even before I knew what he was. But I was with Josh, and neither Mick nor I were the type to take our relationship any further while I was with someone. That and I loved Josh._

_Things had been getting strained with our relationship since I'd been spending so much time working with Mick, but we were trying to work things out, and whatever I felt for Mick, I knew that nothing could ever actually happen between us. Mick drinking my blood in the desert aside, it had remained strictly platonic._

_That was, until I took the Black Crystal._

_All my inhibitions seemed to have disappeared completely under its potent effects. My conscience had taken a holiday, and my mind was focused with crystal clarity on one thing only. Doing what I wanted. And to hell with the consequences._

_I remembered getting changed, almost as if in a daze. I dressed in a skin tight, black, silk dress. It had been hanging in my closet, unworn, for over a year. I'd bought it in a moment of madness, then realised it was far to daring to actually wear. So it had stayed gathering dust in the wardrobe, almost like it was waiting for that one day when my reserve would go out of the window. Slipping it on, I admired myself in the mirror. I looked good in it and I knew the effect it would have on Mick. That was all that mattered. I curled my hair and applied make up, far more than I would usually have worn. I was on a mission, and failure was not an option._

_Feeling a vitality and strength that made anything seem possible, I forwent a taxi, and throwing on a short, red raincoat, set off to walk the several mile journey to Mick's loft.  
The fact that I was wearing six inch heels and walking through the streets on my own after dark didn't bother me in the slightest. I felt overwhelmingly powerful, like nothing could touch me at all. _

_As I passed by the various shops and apartment buildings, I could feel the occupants inside. Nothing specific, just a sense of other human beings going about their business, but it was unlike anything I'd ever felt before. The night air, as I walked, was like a fine mist, as I felt the electric touch of each particle as it flowed over my skin._

_It was exhilarating._

_By the time I reached Mick's building and walked up the stairs to his apartment, I felt almost drunk with elation. I knocked on his door without a trace of fear. I already knew he was at home. I could feel him._

_The door swung open. Mick was walking towards me from a few feet away, the remote pointed at the door._

_"Did you forget something?" His voice trailed off as he realised it was me. The stunned look on his face told me he was more than a little surprised to see me. Or maybe it was the way I looked._

_I regarded him through half lidded eyes. "Hey..'" I said, my voice low and sultry. "Can I come in?"_

_He looked momentarily confused. "Yeah... of course.."_

_I strolled jauntily through the door, undoing the belt of my coat as I went._

_"Is everything okay?" Came Mick's concerned voice from behind me_

_Shrugging off my coat and throwing it haphazardly onto the couch, I closed my eyes and breathed deeply of the scents of the apartment._

_"Everything's great. I feel fine. I walked all the way here."_

_"Why?" He sounded incredulous._

_I swiveled around to face him, fixing him with a sultry stare. "I wanted to feel... the night."_

_He looked at me like I'd gone mad. Then, as though with sudden realisation, "Did you take some of that drug?"_

_I shrugged my shoulder nonchalantly, licking my lips as the memory of the bitter kick of it came back to me. "It was research for my story.... it tasted really weird....."_

_Mick regarded me seriously. "Yeah... that's because it's vampire blood...."_

_Ignoring his admonishing look, I began to stalk slowly towards him, backing him into a corner as he took a couple of steps back. "Do you feel like this all the time?"_

_He gave me a puzzled look. "I don't know...." he frowned. "... I doubt it."_

_I took another step closer and felt his reaction, a slight intake of breath, as I entered his personal space. "I feel everything....." I purred, "...when I was walking... the breeze felt like individual molecules brushing against my skin."_

_I leaned forward slightly so my hips brushed against him._

_His eyes widened and he swallowed reflexively, sidestepping out quickly from between me and the wall and quickly taking a few steps away, his hand going to his mouth in a nervous gesture._

_Not at all disconcerted by his reaction I followed immediately, slinking up behind him and slipping my arms around his chest._

_"I felt people in their houses......" I went on, feeling him stiffen slightly under my touch, though he didn't pull away. "I could feel their lives......."_

_My hand stroked sensuously across Mick's chest. "Can you do that? Do you feel me?" I slipped my fingers under his shirt, tugging at his collar and turning him around to face me._

_He pulled back slightly as I stepped into him, regarding me with a kind of wary fascination. I took the opportunity to slip my arms up over his shoulders and twined them around his neck._

_"Or... or is it more of a 'scent'?" I moved my face towards his, breathing in his scent as I spoke._

_Frowning slightly, he moved his head back away from mine. "You have no idea what you're doing."_

_His pulling away only seemed to make me want to be closer to him and I quickly closed the gap he'd made. "I feel... close... to everything."_

_"To you." I gazed up at him, resting my pelvis against his and relishing the feel of our lower bodies pressed firmly together. His hazel eyes regarded me with a strange mixture of restraint, wonder and desire._

_My gaze dropped to his mouth as I leaned in closer. "There's no space between us." I whispered._

_Just as my lips were about to touch his, he jerked his head backwards out of the way. "Yeah.... there's space....there's space." He gave me that look that someone gives you when they know you've had too much to drink, to stop you making a fool of yourself._

_I took no notice whatsoever, my mind focused on one thing, and one thing only. Seducing him._

_"You saved me twice." I reminded him, stroking my thumb sensuously over the nape of his neck._

_His eyes fluttered shut briefly as I squirmed against him._

_"There are no barriers between us." I murmured, my lips hovering a hair's breadth from his.._

_He pulled away again, reaching his hands up to mine to untwine them from his neck. "You just think there aren't. This is the drug...it's not you."_

_Not put off in the slightest, I put my finger to Mick's lips. "No no no.... shhhhhh... this is me." Slowly and deliberately I ran my fingertip across his mouth, watching his eyes darken with desire as I dragged my fingernail down over his lower lip. "I just didn't know it.... and I like it."_

_Closing the distance between us once more, I whispered softly. "And I wanna be close to you..."._

_This time he didn't move away. His searing gaze locked on mine, his desire no longer hidden._

_My eyes never leaving his, I deliberately leaned in, my mouth hovering over his, although not quite touching, my lips parted invitingly._

_Mere seconds ticked by, but it felt like a lifetime, as I waited for Mick to make the next move._

_Just as I was starting to think he never would, Mick's gaze dropped to focus on my lips, and he moved in to close the gap._

_Before his lips could touch mine I drew back, smiling into his startled gaze with the knowledge that I had him now._

_He looked at me with a mixture of desire and confusion as I backed away._

_"Come on Mick..." I made my intentions clear as I turned slightly in the direction of the stairs._

_"....join me."_

_He made no move to follow me, but the look in his eyes was pure wonder and desire as he watched me walk purposely towards the stairs and begin to climb them._

_As I headed up the staircase, Mick's eyes riveted on me, I didn't have the slightest doubt in my mind that he would follow me. When I reached the top, I took a few steps down the hallway, then realising I didn't know where I was going, I turned around to wait for Mick._

_I didn't have to wait for long._

_As he came around the corner I gave him a long, slow smile._

_"Beth...." He began, his sentence cutting off short as I ran a slow sensuous hand over my breast and down across my stomach, walking purposely towards him as he backed up against the wall._

_"Yes Mick...." I breathed, resting one hand against the wall beside his head and reaching up with the other to trail a path down the side of his face and over his strong jawline._

_"Beth....this isn't you....." He started again, his breath hitching as I took a step closer, placing one leg between his and pressing my hips firmly against his._

_Taking hold of my shoulders he pushed me gently but firmly away, spinning us around and effectively reversing our positions so that my back was to the wall._

_Totally unfazed, I leaned back, regarding him with sultry eyes. "Oh but it is me Mick..... this is just me doing exactly what I want to do... without all those human inhibitions holding me back."_

_I could smell his desire as easily as I could have recognised his after shave. "And I know you want it too..."_

_He shook his head. "When the drug wears off you'll regret this Beth...."_

_I licked my lips seductively. "Well if that's how you feel....." I pushed myself away from the wall, turning to walk back down the corridor on the way to the stairs. I paused, looking back over my shoulder, "....I'll have to go find myself someone else who's willing...."_

_Before I turned my back I caught the brief flash in his eyes that told me I'd said exactly the right thing. Of course I had no intention whatsoever of carrying out my threat, but he didn't know that._

_As I reached the top of the stairs he caught my arm and spun me around to face him. My momentum caused me to stumble into him and he caught me deftly, his hands on my arms, holding me firmly but gently._

_"Beth...." He sounded almost desperate._

_Before he could say anything else, I reached up and touched my lips to his in a brief, almost chaste kiss._

_I drew back, and for a moment we regarded each other, both shocked at the intensity of feeling that brief kiss instilled. Suddenly I felt hesitant, unsure, not quite certain what I should do next._

_It didn't matter though, because Mick knew exactly what to do._

_His hazel eyes almost black with longing, he drew me towards him and lowered his head to mine, capturing my mouth in a kiss almost violent in its urgency, crushing our lips together with a fervor that completely took my breath away._

_For a second I froze with the unexpectedness of it, going completely still in his arms as his hand descended over my lower back, pressing me so hard against him that I was left in no doubt whatsoever of his obvious desire. He parted his mouth slightly, the tip of his tongue sweeping briefly across my lips, sending a bolt of lightning straight to my core. My stomach bottomed out and my knees almost buckled as I parted my lips and met his searching tongue with my own, exploring his mouth, as he, in turn, explored mine. Every nerve ending in my body was raging on fire with an overwhelming wave of passion coursing through me, and had it not been for his strong arms around me holding me up, I think I would have fallen._

_I'd never in my life experienced a reaction so intense. I could feel the strength of his longing for me through the connection of our kiss, and something else, something totally unexpected. Something wonderful... and warm....and totally amazing. It felt almost like...... All coherent thought was instantly obliterated as Mick's hands moved to encircle my waist, his thumbs stroking my stomach in slow circles, slowly moving upwards to caress agonisingly against the underside of my breasts through the thin material. My hands began to move down his back, relishing the feel of the hard muscles beneath my fingers. Without really thinking about what I was doing, my hands slid lower, feeling his muscles tightening under my touch as I cupped my hands over his buttocks and pulled him tightly against me. He let out a strangled sound into my mouth, breaking off our kiss briefly before grabbing me by the shoulders and pushing me back, none too gently against the wall. Without wasting any time, his lips descended to mine once more and our kiss deepened instantly. I was glad I was sandwiched between the wall and Mick's body because I don't think my legs would have held me up. I was overwhelmed with his nearness, his scent, and the delicious things his tongue was doing inside my mouth. I'd wanted this for so long, imagined it even, but the reality was so much more than anything I could ever have dreamed of. I returned his kiss with a passion that almost scared me in its desperation._

_In one swift movement his arms went underneath me, lifting me up, his hands under my thighs supporting me as I wrapped my legs around his waist. With nothing at all to separate us except the denim of his jeans, I could feel the hardness of him pressing straight against my core. It was wonderful, but at the same time completely overwhelming. I let out an involuntary gasp at the sensation, my insides clenching tightly in longing._

_Mick began to trail hot kisses along my jawline and down my neck and I threw back my head in ecstasy as he traced his tongue along my skin, setting my nerve endings on fire in its wake. Unconsciously I ground myself against him, the rough fabric of his jeans scraping over the most sensitive part of me. The resulting jolt of electricity that the movement sparked was enough to make me cry out. My whole body was trembling, a strong tingling sensation burning through every limb, until I felt like I was actually on fire. Pleasurable at first, the violence of it soon became unbearable as I began to feel like my body was out of my control._

_"Mick!" It was almost a cry of desperation at the overpowering feelings threatening to engulf me as I started to struggle in his arms, unable to take any more._

_Immediately Mick's arms loosened around me and he lowered me gently to the floor, still holding me, but more gently, as his hazel eyes regarded me with a look of confusion._

_"You're trembling..... Beth, are you okay?" His expression was changing from confusion to worry._

_I took several deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. "I just need a moment..."_

_"Beth.... “he put a cool hand to my forehead, "... you're burning up."_

_"I'm okay...." The tingling sensation was starting to recede now that I wasn't in quite such close proximity to Mick, and I was starting to miss it. Stepping into him I pressed myself up against him once more, my arms snaking up around his neck as I stood on tiptoe to place a sensuous kiss against his lips._

_"Beth..." He began to protest, but I silenced him with another kiss, edging my tongue between his lips as I tried to pull him closer. He returned my kiss, but with a lot less passion than before, quickly pulling back and peppering me instead with a series of soft, light kisses. Kisses that felt more like an ending than a beginning._

_Untangling my arms from around his neck he drew my clasped hands up to his lips and laid a gentle kiss against my fingers._

_"Mick...what's wrong? Don't.....don't you want this?" I couldn't keep the slight pleading note out of my voice._

_He reached up to brush a lock of hair away from my forehead, tenderly tucking it behind my ear as he cupped the back of my head and reached down to brush another soft, very gentle kiss against my lips._

_"Beth...." He shook his head sadly. "We can't do this... you know that, don't you?"_

_A sense of panic rose up in me at his words. The confidence I'd felt earlier seemed to be seeping away, leaving a desperation in its wake._

_"Mick.... we can!" My voice sounded almost hysterical. I was confused. Why the sudden turn-around when Mick seemed to want this every bit as much as I did?_

_"No Beth..." The finality of his words stung me._

_"But Mick....."_

_"Beth...I'm sorry.... I shouldn't have kissed you.." He lowered his eyes. "It was wrong of me to take advantage like that."_

_"You weren't taking advantage Mick!" Sudden tears of frustration were stinging my eyes as I realised he meant what he said. "Mick... Please!"_

_"Beth... it's the drug. I know you...and I know you'd never act like this..."_

_"If I was a vampire would you be saying this?" I was clutching at straws, and I could feel the drug inspired confidence beginning to slip away. I desperately wanted that feeling back._

_"Where is this coming from Beth?" Mick frowned. "You think I'd want you more if you were a vampire?"_

_"Turn me Mick." I could hardly believe I'd just said the words._

_He looked aghast. "Beth...you don't know what you're saying...."_

_"Please Mick...." I was begging him. "Please turn me...." I started to cry, unable to control the powerful emotions beginning to overwhelm me._

_"Beth.....oh my Beth...." Mick's voice was distraught as he drew me into a fierce hug, holding onto me tightly and rocking me gently._

_"Mick....." I cried, holding onto him for dear life as my body began to shake like a leaf._

_I hardly knew what I was doing anymore, clutching onto Mick, my body wracked with sobs, pleading with him over and over to turn me. I was vaguely aware of being lifted, carried into the bathroom, of Mick taking off my shoes._

_Without knowing quite how I got there, suddenly I was standing in Mick's shower being doused with freezing cold water. I gasped with the shock of it, only realising as I tried to get away, that Mick was standing behind me, holding me tightly against him. I desperately wanted to turn around, to throw my arms around him, to kiss him, but he held me so tightly all I could do was struggle uselessly against his much greater strength._

_"It's the drug Beth....." Mick's deep voice came from right beside my ear._

_"Turn me....." I begged again, writhing within his grasp. "Turn me. Do it!"_

_"No Beth." His voice was gentle._

_My head fell back against Mick's shoulder as I twisted frantically in his arms. "Do it!"_

_His arms tightened around me, his hands clasped together over my chest. "It's just the drug...."_

_I was crying, sobbing, no longer even knowing what I was crying about, aware only that Mick was holding onto me, supporting me, whispering soothing words of comfort as the water carried my tears away. I had no idea how long he held me like that, just a vague awareness of the water finally shutting off, of being gently wrapped in a soft towel, and of Mick's strong arms carrying me, my head resting against the damp cotton of his shirt._

_The last thing I remembered was being laid gently onto something soft, and the feel of his soft lips pressing a gentle kiss against my forehead._

_......................................._

_I awoke to the comforting sounds of someone rattling about in the kitchen, stretching slightly as I opened my eyes, almost about to close them again and snuggle back down, when suddenly I realised I wasn't in my own bed. Glancing down, with a start I recognised Mick's couch, and my eyes took in the large shirt, presumably Mick's, that I appeared to be wearing. Why was I waking up on Mick's couch? And more to the point why was I wearing nothing but Mick's shirt? What on earth had happened last night?_

_Sitting up and at the same time struggling to keep the shirt from riding up, I glanced over my shoulder as footsteps sounded from the kitchen area. Mick appeared, carrying a cup of steaming hot tea, which he set down on the glass coffee table in front of me, before taking a seat in the armchair opposite._

_I smiled my thanks. "What time is it?"_

_"It's early." He was looking at me with a strange mixture of affection and reserve._

_I glanced down at the shirt I was wearing, already knowing the answer to my question. "Is this yours?"_

_He smiled. "Yeah. Your clothes were wet, but they're dry now." His eyes met mine, his expression carefully guarded. "So, do you remember much?"_

_Did I remember much? I stared at him for a moment, unsure how to answer._

_"No."_

_As soon as the words left my lips I knew that wasn't true. A sudden flashback of me strutting into Mick's lounge, feeling nothing less than sex on legs, and backing him into a corner, came back to me. I'd tried to seduce him._

_Oh my God...._

_"Yes." I admitted, feeling heat rushing to my cheeks._

_His only response was a small smile and the slight flicker of one hand, as he lowered his gaze momentarily._

_Oh God...._

_More snippets of last night flashed through my head as I struggled to keep my expression neutral. Mick's lips on mine...... my legs wrapped around his waist........._

_Oh God..._

_Had we?_

_I couldn't possibly ask him. Maybe it would come back to me? No... we couldn't have? There were gaps in my memory, but Mick would have remembered everything....._

_Oh God...._

_All these thoughts flashed through my mind in the briefest of moments. I decided to brazen it out._

_"The drug made me feel invincible, like I was more than human. I felt like the hottest thing on the planet, like no one could resist me."_

_He smiled again. "Wow. It sounds like this drug really gives you all the highs of being a vampire without the lows."_

_He seemed to be offering me a get out of jail free card. We were going to pretend this had never happened? It seemed like a good plan to me._

_"What could be the downside of feeling like that and living forever?" My question was a genuine one, since, at least in the early part of the evening, I had felt truly amazing after taking the drug._

_His expression as he answered my question was so warm and affectionate. Something had definitely changed in our relationship since yesterday._

_"The scrounging, the hiding, missing all of the things that you once loved, like sunbathing, food. I used to love that prime rib at Musso's." He grinned suddenly at the memory. "Now I can't even remember what it tastes like." His expression sobered again. "And they say it gets easier the longer you live, but I hope that's not true."_

_"Really? I'd think you'd hope for the opposite." I was trying very hard to concentrate on our discussion, but as another flashback from last night popped into my head my insides clenched and I fought to keep my eyes focused on his. If he noticed he did a good job of ignoring it._

_"To forget what it's like to be human? No way. Never." He shook his head emphatically._

_I glanced over at the dress hanging from the lampshade, realising I must have been wearing it, but genuinely having no memory of getting dressed in it._

_"I was wearing that?" I was honestly surprised._

_Mick smiled. "Yeah."_

_"That is not like me at all." I realised as I said it that it was a bit of a ridiculous thing to say, considering I owned it._

_He grinned. "Actually, you said it was the real you."_

_I laughed, but I did have to wonder how much of last night was the drug, and how much was really me._

_I put my tea down and stood up, taking care to keep myself covered by the shirt as I didn't appear to be wearing any panties. God.....I sighed inwardly......how on earth was I supposed to ask Mick where they were?_

_"I better get going. I have some apologies to make." I headed upstairs to use the bathroom._

_I didn't much relish the thought of putting last night's dress back on, but there was really no other option. At least I still had my red coat to cover it up. The fact that it would look ridiculous, considering it was at least 80 degrees outside, didn't matter. It would cover me up._

_Mick needed to hit the freezer, so he called me a taxi. Walking back was not an option. I may not have remembered everything about last night, but my feet certainly remembered walking all that way in six inch heels._

_I was dressed and ready to go. Mick saw me to the door, smiling slightly at the sight of me all bundled up in my coat._

_"Bye Mick....thanks for....." I'd been about to say 'everything', but that just sounded wrong under the circumstances. ".....looking after me." I finished._

_"You're welcome." He smiled, and for a moment we shared a look that spoke volumes. I almost reached up to kiss him goodbye, catching myself quickly before I could act on my thought._

_I turned and started through the door, taking a couple of steps out into the hallway, when something made me turn back._

_"Erm.....Mick?"_

_"Yes?"_

_I desperately wanted to know how far things had gone last night, but I was afraid to ask the question. Or, more accurately, I was scared of what the answer might be._

_Mick noticed my hesitation. "Beth?"_

_I took a breath, then shook my head. "It's nothing......it doesn't matter."_

_He leaned against the door jamb as I headed for the elevator._

_"Beth......"_

_I turned back at the sound of his voice._

_He paused for a moment, swallowing before he spoke. "We didn't."_

_As the elevator dinged and the doors slid open, he gave me one last look, his expression unreadable, before quietly closing the door._

.....................................

_*2008*_

The frost on the inside of the freezer was thickening, but sleep still eluded me. I'd spent what felt like hours torturing myself with every possible 'what if' scenario that my mind was able to imagine. I felt mentally exhausted, but there was no respite, and I realised I was never going to be able to sleep. Rolling slowly onto my back I turned my head hopefully to the left, only to be confronted with the lonely sight of Josef's turned back. He didn't appear to have moved a muscle all night, or technically all day, I amended. I knew exactly what people meant when they described someone as sleeping 'like the dead'. He was perfectly still and perfectly silent. Try as I might, and I had tried, I couldn't hear a single sound coming from him. I could only assume that he was fast asleep in whatever kind of 'sleep' vampires slept. I only wished I could do the same, but the longed for oblivion of slumber seemed, at least for tonight, beyond my grasp.

I badly wanted to talk about Simone. I needed to know how she'd died. Had it been instant, or had she suffered? I hoped the former. We hadn't known each other that long, but in the time we had, we'd become close friends. Both in similar situations and sharing similar problems, we'd gelled almost from the moment we'd met, and Simone's open friendly nature and honesty had won me over, even against my better judgement when I'd 'caught' Mick drinking her blood. I'd managed to walk in at just the wrong moment and totally mis-read the situation when I saw her, Mick and Josef apparently enjoying a little threesome of mutual blood sharing. To say I was surprised was an understatement. To my knowledge Mick only ever drank bagged blood, so to find him with his fangs in her arm and an orgasmic expression on her face, while Josef looked on approvingly, was just too much for my confused and very hurt feelings. He was happy to bite Simone, but refused to drink from me? His explanation that he'd only been checking her blood type had seemed ridiculous until I'd later found it out to be the truth.

Simone had come to my apartment the very next day and apologised very genuinely for being the cause of my distress. She'd explained, in very pragmatic and practical terms how little an incident like that meant to a vampire, how we were just a blip in their lifespans, and how the only way to really mean something to a vampire was to become one of them. It had seemed that she might get her wish, as Josef had gradually come to the realisation that in order to love again he had to take a leap of faith and overcome his fear of condemning her to the same fate as Sarah. I, on the other hand, wasn't sure if I wanted to be turned, and Mick had initially been dead set against turning me into the monster he believed himself to be. Even though he had finally agreed to turn me if I really wanted it, his recent spell as a 'human' had seemed to offer another possible path for our future happiness. It seemed ironic that I should be the one to be turned by Josef, while Simone's life was cut painfully short, her dream of everlasting life unfulfilled, and I was left suffering the nightmare of its reality.

I stared up at the frosted lid above my head despairing of ever being able to switch off from the rollercoaster of thoughts that was streaming through my mind. Thoughts of Mick... of Simone...of my parents and friends, and what they might all be thinking and going through right now, of Josef and how he must be feeling having just lost Simone. The last thing he needed right now was a newbie vampire to be babysitting. I was just one more problem for him to be dealing with. One he could surely do without.

Recent events circled around and around in my mind, as I went over each and every one of them thinking how I could, and should, have done things differently. And it all came back to the same thing.

The request I'd made of Josef. Asking him to commit murder on my behalf.

Squeezing my eyes shut, I let out a sob as tears sprang to my eyes, utterly desolate at how stupid I'd been. I threw my arm over my eyes as I cried, as if I could somehow hide from the horror of what I'd done and the awful consequences it had reaped upon us all. I wished for the millionth time that Josef had just left me to die. Tears ran down my face unchecked as heaving sobs racked through my body, small involuntary whimpers escaping as I wept in complete and total abandon.

I cried until there were no more tears to cry. As the last few sobs gradually died down, I found myself taking deep breaths, breaths I certainly didn't need to survive, but seemed incapable of doing without. A sense of panic was starting to take hold as I began to feel the constraining oppressiveness of the closed lid above my head. I pressed my palms against the glass, desperately wanting to be out of the confining space which seemed to be fueling the dark and negative thoughts whirling around my mind in an endless dead end loop. I didn't care about Josef's warning about needing to keep my body temperature down. I had to get out, and it had to be right now, before I went completely stir crazy.

Glancing over at Josef I quickly ascertained that he was still sound asleep as I began to feel urgently down the side of the bed for the release switch. If my memory served me correctly the lid had opened with a minimal amount of noise, so with any luck I could make my exit without disturbing him. He'd seemed to be completely exhausted when he'd come in earlier, and the last thing I wanted to do was to interrupt his much needed rest. My fingers located the switch, and before I could change my mind I quickly pressed it down, breathing a sigh of relief as the mechanism released with a small hiss, and the imprisoning lid glided smoothly upwards. The background hum, which Josef had correctly advised I'd get used to, abruptly ceased, and the ensuing silence was like having a heavy weight lifted from my shoulders.

Glad that Josef still showed no signs of waking, I slowly and carefully drew back the covering duvet, and swung my legs over the side. Very gently, so as not to disturb the mattress, I stood up, quickly scanning the headboard for the switch that closed the lid back down. Once it was down, and still no signs of movement showed from within, I padded as quietly as I could in the direction of the bathroom, a half formed idea in my mind that maybe I could fill the bath with cold water and sleep in there.

It just felt so good to be out of the freezer. Being able to move around freely helped distract my mind from the grim thoughts it had been focused on. Entering the bathroom, I instinctively headed over to the mirrored wall, which currently revealed nothing of the outside world beyond, appearing only as smoky black glass. I flicked the switch that I'd already discovered would turn the wall into a two way mirror, becoming a window from the inside and a reflective mirror from the outside. I flinched at the unexpected burst of sunlight that immediately streamed through the glass and quickly turned my head away from the blinding rays. Blinking rapidly to clear the sun spots swirling in front of my eyes, I struggled to regain my vision, using my hands to shield the worst of the dazzling light as I searched for the button that would darken the electrochromic glass to filter out the worst of the sunlight. The brilliant glare shut off abruptly the instant I depressed the button, and I cautiously turned my head back toward the window as my eyes adjusted to the much more comfortable level of illumination.

It looked to be around midday from the current angle of the sun, but I was pretty sure the specially treated glass would protect me from its effects, and it was so wonderful, after being cooped up in Josef's room, to be able to see the outside world again. I couldn't seem to pull my gaze away from the beautiful garden just beyond the glass. I sank down onto the floor and rested my forehead against the cool glass, strangely at odds with the vista of blazing sunshine and heat on the other side. The smallish oriental style garden was nestled into a natural nook created by the shape of the house, protected on three sides by the walls, and creating a sheltered and private area through the use of dense planting and artful landscaping. 

My eyes were drawn to a tall structure of stacked glass squares, each set at a slightly different angle, down the side of which flowed a stream of sparkling water, twinkling in places as the sun caught the angle just right. At the base was a round stone fountain with a stone seating area in a semi circle around it, surrounded on all sides by gently swaying bamboo. It would be the perfect place to spend a quiet moment away from the hustle and bustle of life, or maybe just to sit and read. I looked longingly out of the window, watching the small birds and insects as they flitted to and fro through the lush green foliage. It looked so peaceful and inviting, and I wished I could simply step outside into the sunshine and take a seat by that soothing waterfall for a few moments just to be out of the house for a while. Maybe later after the sun had gone down, Josef might allow me a bit of freedom to enjoy the garden for a short while. I was starting to get cabin fever stuck inside one room even though it had only been just over a day.

My ears picked up small sounds from outside, much more than I would expected to be able to hear, and I wondered if it was some kind of enhanced vampire hearing that enabled me to pick out the sounds of a birds wings fluttering and the scratch of claws against bark as a small grey squirrel darted through a nearby pine tree. I closed my eyes, concentrating on the sounds, and realised that if I thought about it I could hone in on one particular thing at a time. The buzzing of a bee's wings, the rustling of the bamboo as it swayed gently in the breeze, the sound of the water as it trickled over the surfaces of the glass fountain. It was an intensely soothing sound and I let it cascade through my head, filling me with a sense of calm and tranquility. For several minutes I simply let myself enjoy the feeling of wellbeing it instilled in me, using its mesmerising cadence to lull my mind and, if only for a short while, to distract me from the endless torture my mind seemed unable to keep from inflicting upon itself.

My eyes flew open at the sudden unmistakable sound of footsteps on the stone courtyard floor, and my gaze snapped instantly to the figure making her way through the pathway of pink azaleas towards the circular area around the fountain. Throwing her duffel bag haphazardly onto the ground, she flopped down on the bench, and, leaning back, proceeded to put her booted feet up onto the lip of the fountain, crossing her ankles as she leaned her head back and closed her eyes. 

She couldn't have been more incongruous with the natural beauty of the garden if she'd tried. Jet black hair, cut almost razor short at the sides, was left long in the centre, and fell in a straight black sheet over one eye almost to her jawline. Her skin, in sharp contrast, was palest cream, her pale pink lips providing the only hint of colour in an otherwise black and white landscape. The one eye I could see was outlined heavily in black, and she wore several small hoop earrings in her ear and two more in her nose. She was clad head to foot in black leather, topped off at the foot end with a pair of scuffed, rather old looking Doc Martens. 

As I watched, fascinated by this new distraction, she leaned down and loosened the strings of the duffel, reaching inside and retrieving something which she held concealed in her hand. She glanced around, almost as though checking that no one was around, before leaning back, apparently satisfied that she was alone, and took a cigarette from the packet she held, quickly putting it to her lips and lighting it. I clearly heard the sizzling spark followed by the brief whoosh as the flame sprang to life, then the crackle of burning paper and tobacco as she held the flame to the tip and drew on it. Her exhale as she blew out the fumes was a deep contented sigh, sounding as loud to my ears as if she had been breathing right into them. I had to smile as I watched her puff away, swirls of blueish smoke rising up and swirling through the bamboo canes. I was curious as to who she might be. I was pretty sure Josef's security wouldn't be so lax as to allow entry to any Joe Bloggs passing by, but she certainly didn't strike me as the type to have been picked as one of Josef's live-in Barbie Doll freshies. The very thought of her simpering and fawning on his arm almost made me laugh out loud.

So who on earth was she?

Certainly not a vampire by the way she appeared to be lapping up the midday sunshine, although she could easily have passed for one with her deathly white complexion. Flipping her long black fringe out of the way, she took a last deep drag on her cigarette before getting to her feet and extinguishing it in the fountain. Throwing the butt into the undergrowth she grabbed her bag and swung it over her shoulder, disappearing back into the dense foliage in the direction from which she had come. Scanning the edge of the garden where it met the lawn on the other side, I followed her progress as she emerged back out onto the path, until she turned the corner around the side of the building and was lost to my sight.

The brief interlude had completely managed to take my mind off things I didn't want to be thinking about, and feeling suddenly quite tired, I lay down on the cool tiles, resting my head in the crook of my arm for a few moments as I gazed sleepily at the lush foliage, dotted here and there with blooms of bright pink and fiery red and orange flowers. My eyes drifted shut, but in my mind I could still see the beautiful garden, and my thoughts mused drowsily on the strange girl and her weird gothic appearance. In the back of my mind I was aware of Josef's warning about keeping my body temperature down while I slept. I'd just lie here for a while I thought, then I'd get up and run myself a cold bath... that should suffice to keep me cool while I slept. Yes... I'd just lie here for a little while longer.

..................................

_To be continued/……………………_


	27. The Bloodlust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Disclaimer: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._
> 
> Rating: This chapter - R
> 
> **Full Circle - Beth’s Story**
> 
> **Chapter 27 ******

_*Josef's House, 2008*_

 

"Beth!"

I jerked abruptly awake at the sound of urgent shouting coming from outside.

Sitting up, groggily, I knew at once that I must have been asleep for quite some time. The bathroom was almost in darkness, just a very pale light showing through the darkened window. I felt hot, like I had a temperature, and vaguely woozy, as I unfolded my arms and struggled to sit up.

"Beth!" The shout came again. It sounded like Josef's voice, and he sounded worried, panicked almost.

In the gloom outside I could make out two figures in the distance, security staff by the look of their clothing, searching the grounds beyond the garden. In sudden understanding I realised Josef must have woken up to an empty freezer and thought I'd gone outside!

I scrambled unsteadily to my feet, lurching slightly as a wave of dizziness washed over me, and hurried to the bathroom door and out into the bedroom. As I'd thought, the lid to the freezer bed was open and the room was empty, the bedroom door left ajar. Without thinking, I ran across the floor and out into the hallway.

"Josef! I'm here!" I shouted, leaning over the banister and aiming my voice in the general direction of the huge open hall below. 

There didn't appear to be anyone around, and I stopped for a moment, wondering if I should go downstairs. That's when I suddenly became aware that I was not alone on the landing.

It was as though every molecule in my body stood on immediate alert. My eyes shot towards the figure standing stock still, way over on the far side of the galleried landing. It was the girl from the garden. In an instant, before I even knew what was happening, I felt my fangs descend and my vision sharpen to crystal clarity. She stood as if transfixed, not moving a muscle, her eyes locked on mine like a rabbit caught in the headlights. I could hear her heart beating a staccato rhythm in her chest. The sound filled my mind like it was the only sound in the whole world in that moment. I could smell her fear. Her need to flee. I heard her blood rushing through her veins, faster and faster as her heart sped up from the adrenalin coursing through it.

And the blood. Even from this distance I could smell her blood as though she were standing right next to me. It was intoxicating. The scent filled my nostrils deliciously, and I could almost taste it in the back of my throat. Sweet, warm and deliciously tempting, it called to me like nothing else I had ever experienced. Then, without having a clue how I arrived there, I was suddenly standing just a few feet from her on the other side of the expansive landing. I'd not even realised I'd moved, but I knew that I must have. Her dark eyes widened, regarding me with a strange mixture of terror and curiosity as she pressed her back to the wall, as if willing it to open up and swallow her.

A small voice somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind was screaming at me to stop, but it was like my body was acting of its own volition. I had no control. It was as though I was just an onlooker, powerless to do anything to stop myself. At this distance the smell of her blood was overwhelming. My mouth began to water, and a hunger the like of which I'd never known drowned out any rational thought, as the world receded to a single focus point on her long slender neck. A fast steady pulse was beating, beckoning me towards it with the promise of the sweet, hot liquid flowing just beneath the surface. Try as I might I couldn't drag my eyes away from it.

As if she realised what I was looking at, she raised a shaking hand to cover the spot on her neck, her eyes meeting mine boldly, even as she took quick shallow breaths, her whole body quivering with adrenalin.

'Beth... no... You can't do this..' the small voice shouted inside my head, but it paled into insignificance beside the urgent desire that was fast overcoming any reason.

Suddenly I was mere inches away, once again having moved without even knowing it. Still the girl stood frozen, her eyes wide and fixed on me, a strange mixture of terror and some other emotion, something that almost resembled desire, warring for dominance on her features. My lips parted, my mouth salivating with hunger as I honed in my gaze on the pulsating area of flesh still covered by her trembling fingers. Almost distractedly I took in the shiny black nail polish, gleaming brightly on her short fingernails. 

'No!' Pleaded the small voice in my mind, faint and distant, as though from the depths of some great cavern.

Completely unable to stop myself, I reached up my hand to hers, closing my cool fingers over her warm ones, and easily pulled it away from the quivering pulse point she was attempting to cover. She let out a strangled gasp, turning her head to the side and squeezing her eyes shut as I grasped her other hand and pinned both her wrists against the wall. Her breathing sped up and her heart was going nineteen to the dozen, her breath coming in short gasps, as I leaned in, completely and utterly focused on the heady aroma of that warm, sweet, delicious blood, flowing just beneath the surface of her flawless creamy skin.

As my lips drew back, revealing fangs, sharp and poised for the bite, I heard her sharp intake of breath and I closed my eyes in rapturous anticipation of what was to come.

I was barely a hair's breadth away from piercing her warm, tender flesh, practically able to taste her exquisite blood, when suddenly I was jerked abruptly backwards. One unyielding arm encircled me tightly around my waist and another held me in a vice-like grip across my chest, hauling me forcibly from my prize and pinning me effectively against the solid chest at my back.

Outraged to be denied what was mine, I began to struggle, fighting wildly to free myself from the restraining arms holding me back from my prey.

"Run!" My captor shouted, and even as I battled violently to escape, the small suppressed part of me that was Beth was begging me to stop.

For a long moment the girl remained absolutely motionless, her brown eyes riveted on me, unable to tear them away, watching in horror as I snapped at her like a rabid animal.

"NOW!" The voice shouted again, more urgently this time, and somehow my blood crazed mind finally recognised the owner of the voice as Josef. He was struggling to hold me as I writhed in his grasp like a thing possessed.

As if suddenly released from her paralysis, the girl sprang into motion and ran swiftly in the direction of the stairs.

"NO!!!!!!!" I screamed, renewing my struggles. One part of me was crying out for me to stop and the other, the vampire part of me, was acting on pure instinct alone.

Blood. I had to have her blood. It was a simple as that.

"NO!!!!!!!!" I screamed again, a series of guttural cries bursting forth from my mouth as I practically howled in frustration.

I felt the restraining hold on me loosen as Josef withdrew the arm holding me across my chest, and sudden hope flared as I saw my chance to escape. I began to struggle with renewed vigour when all of a sudden my senses were unexpectedly overwhelmed by the pungent aroma of fresh blood. Distracted, I immediately ceased my struggles and focused my attention solely on the enticing scent emanating from the dark red blood oozing slowly from the arm held in front of my face.

"Drink Beth....." Josef's voice urged.

Fresh blood welled from the two recently inflicted puncture wounds, as trails of crimson began to snake slowly down his pale skin. For a moment I was completely mesmerised, rooted to the spot by the overpowering desire I felt rising up inside me like a tidal wave. Then, quite suddenly, it burst over me, and, like a snake striking at its prey, I grabbed his arm and sank my teeth straight into his flesh. The second his blood touched my tongue, the sense of relief was like nothing I'd ever felt. It was as though I'd been drowning and someone had just thrown me a lifebelt. An instant sense of calm and comfort flowed through me as I drove my fangs more deeply into the wounds, encouraging the blood to flow more freely. As I swallowed, a rush of endorphins assailed me. Suddenly I was intoxicated with euphoria. A river of fire began flowing throughout my body, igniting every nerve ending it passed, and exploding again and again in a shower of ecstasy. Over and over the feeling engulfed me, a chain reaction conquering me totally in its overpowering wake, drowning me in bliss. And all I knew was that I never, ever, wanted it to stop. 

Distantly I was aware of Josef relaxing his hold on me, as the pressure around my middle eased off. It didn't matter though. I no longer wanted to get away. I was right where I wanted to be. The blood flowing down my throat tasted sweeter than anything I could ever have imagined. And it felt so good. Nothing mattered except this one thing. I could drink forever and never have enough.

Time had no meaning as I swallowed down mouthful after sweet mouthful. This was nothing like the bottled blood I'd tasted. It was invigorating, exhilarating, charging me with a vitality that coursed through my veins like nothing else I'd ever experienced. The girl now totally forgotten, I drank with a seemingly unending thirst, drawing Josef's blood into my mouth with a desperate hunger that demanded to be fed.

I've no idea how long I drank for. Completely lost in a world of my own, I was brought swiftly back down to earth by the sound of something crashing loudly into the wall next to my head, shattering into pieces as a cascade of broken glass exploded and fell down around me.

Instantly I let go the arm I was holding, feeling it drop like a lead weight into my lap as I turned to see where the object had come from. A low growl escaped my lips as my eyes fastened on the source of the interruption.

A woman stood on the other side of the landing, breathing heavily, but making no move towards me. Her hair was like fire, reds, golds and amber glittering around her shoulders. Her piercing green eyes regarded me warily, but she stood her ground, something raised in her hand, in readiness, poised to throw again.

"Beth!"

The use of my name startled me. For a moment I think I'd completely forgotten who I was. Confused, I looked around, taking in the shattered remains of the crystal vase, and a pair of legs, clad in dark grey sweatpants, sprawled out limply to either side of me. 

"Beth!" I turned back towards the sound of my name, frowning slightly, trying to clear my head. Her hair no longer appeared to be the colour of fire, and I wondered if I'd imagined it before.

Another missile suddenly came flying at me through the air and automatically I reached out my hand, catching it effortlessly before it could hit me. Examining the object, it took me a couple of seconds to realise what I was looking at. A bag of blood. Like the ones Mick used to keep in his fridge. Bewildered, I looked up at the woman questioningly.

"Feed it to Josef!" She waved her hand, pointing at something behind me.

Josef.....? What was she talking about?

I twisted around, looking behind me, gasping in horror at the sight of the limp body slumped, apparently unconscious, against the metal banisters. Reality came back to me with a bang.

"Josef!" I cried, appalled. What had I done!?

"Josef!" Shaking him, I started to panic when there was no response.

His skin was deathly pale, paler even than his usual fair complexion, and his closed eyes were rimmed with dark red circles.

"Beth! Feed him the blood!" The voice was a little closer now and I turned to see the woman advancing slowly along the galleried landing. It was like a fog finally lifted from my mind as I suddenly realised who I was looking at. It was Helena, Josef's P.A.

"Oh my God..... What have I done?" I was starting to go into meltdown. 

She came to a halt a few feet away from me. "Beth....." He voice was gentler now, coaxing. "....you need to feed him the blood...." She nodded her head towards the bag I was holding in my hand. "... just uncap it, put it to his mouth, and squeeze a few drops onto his tongue.."

My hands shaking, I tried to concentrate on carrying out her simple instructions, but I couldn't seem to work out how to open it. Finally, frustrated and hardly able to see through the tears clouding my vision, I tore the tube open with my teeth, holding it over his mouth and letting a few drop fall onto his pale lips.

Absolutely nothing happened. The excess blood began to run from Josef's slack lips, dripping uselessly onto the wooden floor.

I turned to Helena in panic. "It's not working!"

"Open his mouth and try squeezing a few drops into his tongue..." She instructed me, her brows knitted in a worried frown.

I turned back to Josef, pushing the tube between his lips and squeezing the bag again, watching desperately for any sign of movement to indicate he was swallowing the blood. "Come on Josef....." I whispered, squeezing the bag in both hands, "......please drink... please...." But his head rolled to the side, the tube slipping from his lips as the blood spilled uselessly onto the floor. His body was completely still, no movement, no breath, and no sign of life whatsoever.

I glanced up at Helena, my eyes pleading for help. "What do I do? He's not drinking it!"

"Try tipping his head back to open up his throat, and put the tube it a bit farther so it doesn't slip out." Her voice was very calm and re-assuring, although the worried look on her face told a different story.

I tried again, this time moving to kneel behind him and tilting his head back as Helena had suggested, and coaxing his mouth open with my fingers as I once again slipped the tube between his lips, trying my best to make sure it was as far inside his mouth as possible. Steadying his head between my knees I used both hands to empty the bag of the remaining blood, my eyes fixed on his throat, desperately willing him to swallow.

Still nothing.

"Helena!" I was distraught. "I think.......oh my God....... I think he's dead!" I looked up at her, terror beginning to rise up inside me. "I think I've killed him!" 

"Beth honey... calm down..." Her voice was carefully controlled and soothing. "... I'm pretty sure you haven't killed him..." She took a couple of steps towards me, "....I can't be sure, but I seem to recall Josef telling me that you can only kill a vampire by fire or beheading...."

Her words were meant to reassure me, but they did nothing to quell the rising panic bubbling up inside me. When Mick was in the desert, hadn't he been at the point of death just from over exposure to sunlight? Josef was my sire. What was I supposed to do without him? I needed him. He couldn't be dead. He just couldn't be.

Not knowing what else to do, I gathered him up in my arms, supporting his upper body against me in the hope that the blood would somehow drain down his throat. Instead, it began to trickle uselessly from his mouth.

"No!" I screamed, rocking him back and forth, "No Josef! You can't die. Please don't die!"

"Beth!" I dimly registered the sound of Helena's retreating voice. "Stay where you are.....I'm going to get help. I'll be right back."

Tears were streaming down my face as my mind raced, trying to recall everything Mick had ever told me about vampires. It all came back to one thing. The only cure I knew of, for a dying vampire, was blood. I'd saved Mick's life once by feeding him my blood. Why hadn't it worked on Josef? Was he simply too far gone?

His body felt like a dead weight in my arms. He'd survived for over four hundred years. How could he die like this? It just wasn't possible. There had to be a way. I held him to me tightly, rocking him gently, willing him to wake up.

Suddenly it was like a light went on inside my head. My blood. I'd fed Mick my blood. I'd no idea whether it would make any difference but it had to be worth a try.

Shaking like a leaf, I sank my human teeth into my arm and bit down. It hurt like hell but without fangs to pierce the flesh, it barely broke the surface. Frustrated, I realised I had no idea how to just vamp out. I looked around in desperation for something I could use to cut myself. My gaze fell on a shard of broken glass from the shattered vase, and I snatched it up, steeling myself as I quickly sliced it across the tenderest part of my arm.

Blood started to well from the cut immediately, and desperately I pressed it against Josef's slack lips, praying with all my heart for it to work.

For long, heart-stopping moments, I held my breath as I waited for some sign of life from the inert body I held in my arms. I was starting to fear nothing was going to happen when a very faint shudder went through Josef's body, his hands came up to grip my arm, and an instant later I felt the movement of his tongue against my skin as he started to lap the blood from the wound I'd made. A wonderful rush of relief washed over me, overtaken a second later, as I felt him draw strongly on the open wound, by a tidal wave of the most amazing, mind-blowing feeling. My mind went blank. Suddenly everything seemed to make absolute sense. I was melting and exploding. In dire need, but completely and utterly fulfilled. Totally out of control on a wild roller-coaster ride. Desperate for it to stop, but at the same time wanting it to continue forever. I was drowning in pleasure. Falling willingly into the abyss. Time lost all meaning as everything condensed into a feeling so wonderful, so overpowering, that literally nothing else mattered.

Time ebbed and flowed. My mind drifted, aware only that it was happy. Was I in heaven? It felt like it.

Abruptly it ceased. I screamed as hands pulled at me, arms constraining me, tearing me away from the source of my pleasure. For a second, the gut wrenching loss of it was exquisitely, unbearably painful. An agonizing white light exploded in my head, searing, burning, increasing in intensity until I could take no more. I felt sure I would certainly die.

Then, thankfully, darkness descended, and I knew no more.

..........................................

I woke up disorientated. It took me a few moments to recognise Josef's freezer bed. I was laying on soft pillows, and wrapped in a comforting duvet. I turned to my side, looking for Josef, only to realise I was alone. Instantly panic rose up as the memory of what had happened returned. Trying to sit up, constrained by the still sealed lid, I started to fumble urgently for the release switch, the need to find Josef the one and only single focused thought on my mind.

Before I even had a chance to find the button, the lid disengaged and Josef was reaching out a hand to mine.

"It's okay Beth....I'm here."

"Oh my God!" Before he knew what had hit him, I'd launched myself out of bed and into his arms, clinging to him for dear life. "Josef.....I'm so sorry....." sobs and sniffles punctuated my words as I cried my relief out against his chest, ".....I thought I'd killed you...."

He laughed, hugging me back and stroking my hair, "Well...technically I'm already dead....but thanks for the sentiment."

"I'm so, so sorry...." I couldn't stop apologising. "I don't know what I'd have done if I'd killed you...."

He laughed. "Well...burial or cremation is generally the usual procedure...but hey...fielder's choice."

"Josef..." I disentangled myself from him for a moment to look him in the eyes, "....I mean it... " the smile slid slowly off his face as he realised the seriousness in my voice, "...I don't know what I would have done without you...." I struggled to put into words how I'd felt looking at his lifeless body lying on the floor, "...if I'd lost you....." I paused, unable to adequately express the feeling of total desperation and desolation, ".....you're the only person..... the only one I have left right now....." my voice petered out, unable to go on.

He looked at me pityingly. "Beth....I'm so sorry.....I really am. But we are going to find Mick..." He reassured me, a look of steely determination in his eyes. "...we have to."

I simply nodded, unable to speak as a powerful wave of emotion hit me at the mention of Mick's name, bringing fresh tears to my eyes and an unbearable heaviness to my heart.

Josef pulled me back into his arms and for a few minutes we just stood, silently holding one another, both deep in our own thoughts, taking what comfort we could from each other's embrace.

After a while, as neither of us appeared to be moving, the urge to say something became overwhelming. "Is this getting awkward or is it just me?" I asked, my face still buried against his chest.

"It's so completely awkward...." He sighed dramatically, making no move to release me. "I love awkward." 

I smiled against his shirt. Everything was going to be okay. We'd find Mick. Things just had to get better from here. For now, I still had Josef. All was not lost. Finally I could feel a little hope, a small chink of light at the end of the very dark tunnel.

Unexpectedly, a sudden sob came from Josef's chest. Surprised, I pulled away to look at him, alarm replacing my surprise as I watched his face distort with emotion, his shoulders starting to shake. Aghast, I watched in horror as he proceeded to double over and break down in tears.

"Josef!" I was momentarily stunned, baffled as to what had caused this sudden breakdown. He was falling apart right in front of my eyes. I did the only thing I could think of and drew him into my arms, cradling his head against my chest as he clung on to me and wept.

"Beth...." His strangled voice was barely above a whisper, his hand clutching onto my arm desperately. "It hurts so much..."

"I know Josef....I know..." I stroked his hair and struggled to swallow past the lump that suddenly came to my throat.

"I really loved her......and now it's too late..."

"She loved you too Josef. " I hugged him more tightly, stroking slow, soothing circles on his back. "I know she did."

His legs buckled beneath him and we collapsed together into a heap on the carpet, his head against my chest, as his tears soaked wetly into my shirt. For long minutes I simply held him, wordlessly comforting as I rocked him gently. Gradually his sobs began to subside, until finally he was still and quiet in my arms.

He drew away from me slightly, wiping a shaking hand over his face and running it through his hair. "Not my greatest display of manliness this year…” he apologised.

"Don’t be stupid Josef….." I looked at him seriously.

He tried to smile but failed.

"Was it something I said?" I asked, half jokingly.

He snorted, the tears still wet on his eyelashes as he smiled, bowing his head. "You could say that...."

We were silent for a moment, Josef looking as lost for words as I felt. It had suddenly come to me what had set Josef off. I remembered vividly Josef's comments after I'd accidentally walked in on the three of them, catching Mick in the act of drinking Simone's blood. 

_"Hi Beth.....we were just having drinks...."_

_I'd glared back, in stunned horror, absolutely furious._

_Mick looked completely chagrined, like I'd caught him cheating on me. Josef had reacted like a naughty schoolboy who'd just been caught smoking behind the bike sheds._

_"But this is so awkward......I love awkward."_

_Simone had taken charge of the situation, discreetly dragging Josef out the door to give Mick and I some privacy._

_I think Mick had misunderstood my anger at the time. He thought I was horrified to see him drinking someone's blood, whereas in actual fact I was just angry it wasn't mine._

_Seeing him with his mouth wrapped around Simone’s wrist, and the ecstatic look on her face as he drank her blood, was hauntingly erotic. This was Mick the vampire, as opposed to Mick the 'anti-vampire vampire', and I was beyond excited to see it._

_I'd given him such a hard time over it, finally admitting to him that I wanted him to drink my blood. He'd been surprised, saying he didn't regard me as 'food'. I didn't want to be simply food either. I wanted to be that prime rib from Musso's that had brought such a smile of fond remembrance to his face._

My thoughts returned to the present. Thinking about Mick and Simone, one missing and one dead, I could feel the full weight of devastation start to overwhelm me again. My mind was starting to shut down as my thoughts drifted. I stared blindly at nothing in particular.

A squeeze on my hand brought me back to my senses, and I looked down, surprised to see Josef's fingers still wrapped around mine.

He took a deep breath and seemed to gather himself. "I guess you had better go and take a shower," he suggested, nodding at my shirt. "... you look like you just orchestrated the great Texas chainsaw massacre."

I looked down at my blood-stained t-shirt, aghast that I'd not even noticed.

"Eeeeew!"

"Go on," he nodded, rising to his feet and hauling me up along with him. "I'll wait out here until you're done, then we'll go to my study and have a talk." He smiled, "I might even introduce you to some of my freshies...,"

"Josef.....you don't have to wait outside, I'm quite capab...."

He interrupted me. "Oh...I think I do...." He caught sight of the look on my face, giving me a pointed look, "...and no argument."

He squeezed my hand once more before letting me go and propelling me in the direction of the bathroom.

....................................

Fresh from my shower and feeling a million times better than I had since my turning, I took a seat opposite Josef in one of the huge leather armchairs in his study. It was still early evening, and I'd been surprised to learn I'd only been out of it for just over an hour. I felt refreshed as though I'd slept for days.

The room was enormous, although the rows of dark wooden bookshelves, small tables and various leather sofas and armchairs scattered about, not to mention the two large fireplaces adorned with exotic looking ornaments, made it feel cosy and welcoming.

Josef poured himself a large glass of whisky from the cut glass decanter sitting on the table between us. He waved the bottle at me, raising an enquiring eyebrow. "Scotch?"

I gave him a looked that said 'duh'. "Do I look like I drink whisky Josef?"

"Whisky?..." he shook his head, appalled, "... this is so much more than just whisky... This.." he held the glass up to the light, admiring the sparkling amber liquid as it swirled in the glass. "... this is the finest traditionally made Scotch you will ever drink. Made from only malted barley, first dried over fires that have been stoked with dried peat harvested from the heather moors." He took a sip, closing his eyes in ecstasy as he drank in the taste. "You can actually taste the smoky tang of those heather fires in every mouthful."

I smiled. "Still not looking like I drink whisky..."

He held up a finger as a timely knock sounded on the heavy wooden door. "Which is why I asked Helena to rustle you up something special." He got up to open the door and Helena came in carrying a tray set with two glasses and a flask.

"How are you feeling Beth?" She asked me, setting the tray down on the table and sitting herself down in the armchair next to me.

I hesitated, taken aback by her friendly attitude, and more than a little disturbed that the scent of her human blood, even through her skin, came to me so strongly that I was worried I might suddenly pounce on her and try to take a bite. It was like sitting next to a juicy hamburger. Luckily my recent meal seemed to have satisfied my hunger for the moment, and my fangs remained safely sheathed.

I took a breath but no words came out. Hell, the last time she'd seen me I'd been trying to drain her boss to death. What was I supposed to say to her?

She didn't seem to be bothered by it in the least. "Reni thought you both deserved a special treat." She indicated the two cocktail glasses, frosted white on the rim. Reaching for the flask, she uncapped it and deftly filled each glass almost to the rim with a thick, red liquid.

Suddenly the pungent aroma of blood drifted to my nostrils, and to my absolute horror I felt myself vamp out on the spot. I did the first thing I could think of and quickly covered my face, turning my head away from Helena. Josef was by my side in an instant, his hand on my arm.

"Beth...it's okay. Helena's seen this before. You don't need to hide it." He took hold of my hands and gently pulled them away from my face.

"Are you sure?" I glanced at Helena. The flaming red hair that gleamed like a halo of fire around her head was back, and I realised I hadn't been imagining it before. "Your hair looks amazing." I said, saying the first thing that came to mind.

She looked surprised as she patted her hair in confusion. "Well....um....thank you."

"No.... well it does look nice…. but what I mean is that through vampire eyes your hair looks like spun fire. The colour is just beautiful." I gazed at her in wonder.

I think I left her speechless as she blushed, turning her attention back to the tray and concentrating on adorning each glass with a twisty straw and brightly coloured umbrella. Finally she lifted the lid from a small bowl and dipped in a teaspoon, dusting the top of each drink with sparkling golden sprinkles.

Handing one to each of us she smiled broadly. "To cheer you both up after your...." She paused, searching for the appropriate words. "....er.....rather traumatic start to the day. Reni thought the straws might be nice....like you could kind of...." she cocked an eyebrow, "....suck on it."

I burst out laughing at her apt choice of words. "That is so sweet of her....she's the lady who cooked me that lovely lasagne the other night isn't she?"

"That's the one." Grinned Helena. "She the veritable Mrs Beeton of Casa de Kostan."

I lifted my glass and drained it quickly. There was no denying that the addition of gold sprinkles, coupled with the elaborate glass, certainly made drinking blood feel a lot more normal and comfortable. Setting the empty glass back down on the tray I looked at Josef, who was staring at his with rather obvious distaste.

"Drink up Josef.." I urged with a wicked smile.

Obediently he put the straw to his mouth and drained his glass, glaring at me over the rim before placing it back down.

“Thank you Helena..” I smiled at her, “…and please thank Reni for her kind thought,”

She smiled back at me, “You’re most welcome.”

As I looked at her, I saw her hair was back to the usual light auburn, and quickly ran my tongue over my teeth to verify my face had gone back to normal. I'd not even noticed it happen.

Preoccupied with checking my teeth, I suddenly realized Helena was talking to me. "Let me know if there's anything you need." She was saying. "I'm more than happy to get you clothes, toiletries, make up, hair products....just make a list or phone it through to me. You can reach me on ext 451 from any of the house phones. Just leave a message if I'm not there." She smiled. "Oh, and I almost forgot...there's a pair of Hello Kitty pyjamas for you on the nightstand next to your bed."

I glanced at Josef curiously. "You asked for Hello Kitty pyjamas for me?"

He shrugged, shaking his head.

Helena put her hand on my knee. "No...they're courtesy of Rachael. She seemed to think you might like them. I hope you don't mind."

"Rachael?"

Josef turned to Helena with a slightly uneasy look. "I've not explained to Beth about Rachael yet....."

"Ah...." She nodded. "Well Beth...I guess I'll leave Josef to elaborate." Picking up the tray, she stood up to go as I looked from her to Josef curiously.

"And don't forget.." She paused at the door, "...anything you need, just let me know. Don't forget.... extension 451."

"I won't." I smiled at her gratefully. "And thank you."

"Anytime." She smiled back, pulling the door closed behind her.

"She's lovely Josef....." I was amazed and taken aback at her kindness. "...and I'd guess she's a lot more to you than just your average P.A. ...?"

"She certainly is..." He smiled, sitting back down in the armchair opposite, "...we go back a long way..."

I raised a curious eyebrow.

"But that's a story for another day..." He looked pensive for a moment, then seemed to collect himself. "Anyway....going back to your earlier question about Rachael....." he paused, choosing his words carefully, "....take a guess at who you were eyeing up for a quick snack on the landing earlier..."

"Oh no!" I couldn't believe I'd been about to drain someone who'd chosen me Hello Kitty pyjamas. "I feel so bad.... I must have scared the poor girl half to death."

Josef looked amused. "It takes quite a bit to scare Rachael...she's just never met a newly turned vampire before...I'm sure she'll get over it."

"Is she one of your freshies?" I asked curiously. "She doesn't seem the type somehow..."

He snorted. "Rachael? A freshie?" His face sobered.

"No."

My curiosity was piqued. "So...?"

"She lives here...has done for six years now." He shifted in the armchair, crossing his legs and running a hand through his hair as he gazed thoughtfully into his glass of Scotch. "I found her on the streets when she was just fifteen.."

"Oh?" Somehow I'd never pictured Josef as a Good Samaritan.

He smiled. "She tried to rob me....did rob me in fact.." He corrected, "...quite a feat when your victim is a vampire..."

I was impressed. "How did she end up on the streets?"

"Family breakup. Her mother and father split up, her mother's new boyfriend moved in, and it all went to hell from there. She left when the violence got too much. Slept rough in one of the worst districts of L.A. for over three months before I found her."

"And her father?"

"Not interested. Didn't even bother to keep in touch." Josef's face showed the disgust I felt.

"Oh my God... the poor kid.." She'd had a hard enough start to life without a newbie vampire trying to eat her to boot. "So...she just ended up staying?"

"Reni and Helena both loved her to bits. Spoiled her rotten and mothered her like she was one of the family. Helena convinced me to let her stay.." He shot me a small smile, "... not that I needed much convincing..."

Draining the last of his drink, he leaned forward and poured himself another glass. "She's in her third year of college now and doing exceptionally well.." I couldn't help noticing that he practically glowed with pride as he spoke the words.

I looked at him with new eyes. "I think I misjudged you Josef....maybe you're not such a reprobate after all?"

He smiled a wistful smile. "No...I'm definitely a reprobate.."

"I have to apologise to her..." I paused, wondering if she'd even want to see me, "...if that's okay... with her..." I looked at Josef questioningly, "...and with you?" I added.

"I'll talk to her. I'm sure she'll want to meet you anyway."

"Thank you..." I sighed, "...but what happened..." I shook my head trying to remember how it had felt, "... it was like I wasn't even in control. Like I was doing it, but I wasn't meaning to be doing it?" I glanced at Josef, hoping I was making some kind of sense.

"That's why they call it blood lust" he smiled a quick closed lipped smile that didn't quite reach his eyes, "... the lust part just kind of takes over." 

"But I'll learn to control it... right?" The thought of that happening every time was terrifying.

His eyes were full of compassion as he replied. "Eventually.....yes."

"But I didn't feel anything like that with the bottled blood?" I queried.

"It's different with a living, breathing human." He looked at me sympathetically. "They tend to be a lot more...." he paused, searching for the right word.

"... appetising." He decided.

"Appetising? That's putting it mildly....it was like...." I struggled to put it into words, "... I can't even tell you what it felt like. I've never experienced anything like it before."

"Which is why I asked you not to leave my room Beth.." His look was stern but kind.

"But I didn't...I mean..I did.. but I was only looking for you."

He looked at me confused.

"I mean... I only went to the bathroom.."

"You're trying to tell me you got up because you needed to use the bathroom?" He looked doubtful. "Most vampires I know don't use the bathroom that often.."

"No... " I faltered, "I mean I couldn't sleep... I was getting claustrophobic in the freezer... I had to get out." 

"Beth..." He regarded me sympathetically, "...you're going to have to get used to it. I cannot stress enough the importance of spending your sleep time in the freezer."

"I was going to fill up the bath with cold water..." I paused guiltily, "... but I fell asleep." I attempted to explain. "Your garden was so beautiful... and I so wanted to be outside.. I was just going to watch it for a while..." My voice trailed off and for some reason I omitted to mention having seen Rachael there.

"It is beautiful isn't it?" He smiled. "I'll take you out there for a while later..." He gave me a serious look, "I'm sorry... I hadn't thought how confining this must feel for you... but I need to know that you......." I could see him thinking his choice of words over before he said it,"... can be trusted... before I can allow you free run of my house. You must understand that?"

"Oh absolutely I do..." I nodded in firm agreement. "I hadn't even meant to leave the room really... but when I heard you shouting ... looking for me... I just wanted you to know I was here. I ran out onto the landing..... and well... you know what happened after that."

"Noted." He smiled ruefully. "Check bathroom first next time." He sank back in his chair and took another large swig of Scotch, running a hand through his hair.

"Josef..." I leaned forward, looking at him directly in the eye. "...I can't thank you enough for what you did to stop me. I might well have killed her had it not been for your intervention. I'm sure I managed to scare her half to death as it was."

He took a breath to say something, then stopped, choosing instead to pour himself another glass of Scotch, then downing it in one. He stared down into his empty glass as though considering what to say.

Neither of us had talked about what had happened earlier on the landing. It was almost as if we were in unspoken agreement not to discuss it. I didn't know about Josef, but ever since I'd awoken earlier, at least from the moment I'd realised I hadn't killed him, I'd been feeling a sense of peace and tranquility that seemed at odds with my current situation. The desperate unhappiness and sense of helplessness I'd been feeling were not gone completely, but I felt stronger, more able to cope than I had before. I had no idea why, but I was grateful for whatever the reason.

Putting his glass back down on the table, Josef fixed me with a searching look. "I've been meaning to ask you about that.."

I struggled to hold his gaze, not really wanting to talk about it.

He cleared his throat. "Um....how did it make you...um....feel....?"

Feeling suddenly embarrassed, I stared at the floor, wishing it would open up and swallow me.

"It...?"

He raked his fingers through his hair and his hand went to his mouth as he chewed nervously on a nail. "Drinking my blood."

"Um...." I faltered. What was he asking me exactly? I presumed all vampires liked drinking blood? "....err.....kind of good I guess?" I made it a question.

"Just....'good' ?" He raised an enquiring eyebrow.

"Well....." I shrugged. "....really good?"

He was just looking at me perplexed.

"Amazing?" I tried again.

"Beth...the reason I'm asking is because of the effect it had on me."

"Oh?" Now I was confused.

Now it was his turn to look embarrassed. "I should have been able to stop you. Instead I let you drain me almost dry. As your Sire it's my responsibility to control you until you're capable of doing it for yourself. I couldn't do that...." He put his head in his hands. When he looked up at me the pain in his eyes was palpable. "I failed you Beth."

"Josef!" I couldn't believe he was beating himself up over something I'd done. "You didn't fail me....what you did worked! You stopped me from hurting Rachael."

"Yes, but what if you'd tried to hurt Helena? I wouldn't have been much help there would I?" He seemed determined to take the blame.

“She was great with that vase…..” I said admiringly.

“She was…” he agreed. “I’ll have to thank her for that later..... " he paused, his expression slightly baffled, "....but it really shouldn't have been necessary.... I expected enjoyment, but I definitely did not expect to be completely overwhelmed the way I was." He eyed me thoughtfully. "Usually the enjoyment of the donor is directly related to the enjoyment of the one doing the drinking."

I lowered my eyes, embarrassed, unsure as to whether I'd done something wrong here. "Josef.... I'm sorry..."

"Beth... " Josef leaned forward and dipped his head down to catch my gaze, "... you've nothing to apologise for. It's not something you can control. I simply wondered how it felt... that's all."

I forced myself to look at him, although I had no idea what to say. It was almost impossible to describe the feeling because I'd never felt anything quite like it in my life. Or death for that matter...

Sitting forward in my chair, I picked up Josef's glass, pouring myself a generous measure of Dutch Courage and quickly downed it in one. The liquid burned hot against my throat and it's fiery taste felt oddly comforting.

Setting it back down, I took a deep breath. 

"It was kind of a rush....." I stared intently at the table. "...the way I guess maybe it feels to inject drugs...?" I shrugged, raising my eyes to his. "I've never taken them so I wouldn't really know......." He was staring at me intently. Steeling myself, I forced myself to continue. "It was definitely a high... addictive.... thrilling...." I tried to accurately put it into words, failing miserably, "..... gratifying?" I tried, almost asking him.

He motioned for me to continue. I gazed down at the floor, trying my best to recall the feeling. "It made me feel a sense of peace, but as the same time.....exhilarated.....like I was drinking pure power. My whole body was buzzing with it." I looked up, meeting Josef's intense gaze. "I just absolutely loved it. And I never wanted it to end. Ever. It felt like home."

There was a pause as I waited for Josef's response.

"Is that how it was supposed to feel?" He hadn't said anything and I was starting to wonder if I'd said the wrong thing.

He looked like he was trying to decide what to say. Finally leaning forward, resting his forearms on his knees, he took a hesitant breath. "..... Sometimes it's not so good....much depends on who you're with. Chemistry and all that.." He smiled. "As your Sire, I'd expect you to find my blood powerful. There's absolutely nothing wrong with you."

"So...how did it make you feel?" I asked tentatively.

He was silent for a few moments, and I could see he was trying to find the words to describe it. He gazed thoughtfully into the distance, then, slowly his eyes returned to mine.

"Happy." He decided. "And like absolutely nothing else mattered." He gave a lopsided half smile. "Doesn't sound like much does it?"

I looked at him for a long moment. "Josef....you're describing exactly how I felt when you drank from me. I'm not surprised you couldn't stop me. I thought I was going to die when it ended."

"Oh Beth...." He got to his feet and started to pace, shaking his head worriedly. "This is not good..."

I was confused. "What do you mean 'not good'?"

Ignoring me, he took his cell phone out of his jacket pocket and without ceasing his relentless striding, punched out a number.

"Helena?" There was a pause. "Can you get Alexander on the phone?" Another pause. "I don't care what time it is in England...he's woken me up enough times!" Another pause. "Okay...I'll be waiting." 

"Who's Alexander?" I asked as Josef's pacing increased in speed, his hand reaching up to run through his hair in a nervous gesture. "And why is it not good?"

Ignoring my first question, he went straight to the second. "It's not good because how on earth am I supposed to teach you what you need to know when we have that effect on each other?!" He practically shouted it at me.

"But Josef..."

He interrupted me. "I can't just let you loose on my freshies. You need to practice....."

The phone rang and Josef punched angrily at the button to answer it. "Kostan" he barked.

"Ah...Alexander...so you're still alive then?" He rolled his eyes as he listened to the reply. "Yes...I'm sorry to drag you out of your coffin at this hour but I have a favour to call in...." Looking a bit calmer, he sat back down in the armchair. "...well...I've just turned a beautiful young woman and I need you to come and babysit for a while.." He held the phone away from his ear as a string of obscenities issued forth from the other end of the line."...yes...you did hear correctly...and no, I'm not joking..." Another pause and more obscenities. Josef smiled. "So I'll see you tomorrow then?" There was another brief pause as Josef's face became deadly serious. "Alex...you owe me one.." His gaze flicked briefly to me as he nodded. "Okay...I'll send someone to fetch you from the airport. Text me your flight details." He finished the call and sank back into the chair, breathing a sigh of relief.

The sense of peace and calm I'd been feeling was beginning to slip away as I realised Josef was intending to pawn me off onto someone else.

I was starting to get angry. "Josef...have you just arranged to give up on me and ditch me with someone else?"

"Beth...calm down. It's not like that.."

I cut him off. "What do you mean? Not like that? That's exactly what you just did! You're my Sire Josef! It's you I need to teach me....not some...whatever his name is....Alexander...someone who just happens to owe you a favour!" I was the one up and pacing now.

He stood up and reached for my hands. I quickly swiped them out of his way behind my back. "Don't touch me!"

"Beth...come and sit down." He reached for my hand again. "I'm sorry...that was tactless of me." He looked genuinely contrite. "Sometimes I can be a complete jackass.."

I glared at his outstretched hand for a moment before crossing my arms defiantly and stalking angrily back to my chair. I looked daggers at him, “You certainly can…”

Josef sat back down, raking his hands anxiously through his hair. He looked at me beseechingly. “Beth…..I can’t do this on my own..”

He looked so anguished I couldn’t help but thaw a little. “Josef…..have you ever turned…tried to turn….anyone else…” I hesitated, not wanting to dredge up bad memories, “….besides Sarah?”

He regarded me somberly. “Not since Sarah. But when I was much younger… yes….quite a few actually.” He sighed, “But as far as I can remember, mutual blood sharing was never that intense.. I had hoped to teach you how to drink from a freshie by letting you practise on me, but as it is... " his voice trailed off, "... I don't think either of us should drink one another's blood until we know what we're dealing with here."

"So that wasn't normal then?" I was getting more confused by the minute.

He looked defeated. "No."

"Well that's just great." My shoulders slumped. I had hoped we could get the training part out of the way as quickly as possible so I could get back out into the world and start doing something about finding Mick.

"So that's where Alexander comes in...." Josef quickly reached across the table for my hand as I shot him a hard stare, "...he can help with the practice...assuming, that is, that you don't have the same effect on him." He suddenly looked worried, like he'd not considered the possibility before. "And Beth... " he looked apologetic, "...I have to be honest.... I'm really not sure I'm up to the task of giving you the attention you deserve right now. Simone's death....." His voice faltered at the mention of her name and I saw his eyes go shiny as he struggled to fight back tears.

Immediately I felt bad. Whatever I was going through, it couldn't possibly be as bad as the way Josef must be feeling right now.

"Josef... I'm so sorry...." I reached across the table to give his hand a squeeze.

He cleared his throat and pulled himself together to continue. "And there's the blood stocks.... I don't usually keep much in the way of emergency bloods supplies.... not a lot of call for it really...." He smiled. "... I've already had Helena bribe Guillermo for extra.... if I'd known I was going to be turning you, I'd have made preparations in advance. But you need to start feeding fresh as soon as possible. It's the only way you'll learn to control the hunger."

I thought about Josef's very female freshies and wondered if he expected me to drink from them. Should I have male freshies? Was that how it worked? And where exactly did a person get a freshie? Dial-a-Donor?

"So... who's going to be my freshie?" I was starting to feel nervous at the thought of having to feed from one of Josef's girls.

Josef looked down, before raising tired looking eyes to mine. "Again... if I'd known in advance I was about to be your Sire...."

"I don't know if I'm comfortable with the idea of drinking from another woman.." I stammered.

No sooner than the words were out of my mouth it dawned on me that I'd had no such qualms earlier on the landing. If Josef hadn't found me when he did I would almost certainly have drunk Rachael's blood. It hadn't seemed a problem at all at the time.

If Josef realised the irony of what I was saying, he didn't acknowledge it. He looked sympathetic. "I do have one male freshie.... Ramon ...... he's handy for when I have female vampires visiting. He doesn't live here, but I can ask Helena to contact him and see if he's available." He let go my hand to dig his cell from his jacket pocket and quickly punched in the number. "Helena... would you mind giving Ramon a call? Yes.... for Beth." He nodded. "Okay... that's great. In the meantime, would you mind asking Chloe or Emily if one of them could come to my study in about half an hour?" He frowned. "For me..." There was a pause, "... why do you ask?". He listened intently to the response, his frown deepening as he put a hand to his forehead and closed his eyes. "No... it's okay.... my fault, not theirs... " He reached for the bottle of Scotch and poured himself another large measure. "... well hopefully we can sort it out when Alexander gets here tomorrow....." The whisky was downed in a single swallow. "....yeah.....okay... I trust you. Do whatever you think is best."

Josef hung up, breathing out a deep sigh, and flung himself back in the armchair in a gesture of defeat.

"Dammit!" Josef's exclamation startled me as he punched the armchair in frustration.

"Crap! Crap! Crap!" I'd never seen Josef so upset.

I looked at him, bewildered. "Did you just get an attack of Tourette's, or is something wrong?"

He looked up at me and I saw the corners of his mouth start to twitch in the beginnings of a begrudging smile. He ran his hand over his face and let out a deep sigh. "Chlo and Em somehow got wind of what happened earlier and now they're scared to come near you..."

I let out a breath I didn't realise I'd been holding. That sounded like good news to me. Not having to drink from them then.... "Oh dear....." I tried to sound disappointed.

He cocked an eyebrow. "I could always take you to my club..... they have both male and female freshies in abundance..." 

My face must have been a picture of horror as I imagined some high class sleaze joint with semi clad freshies offering themselves up like sacrifices.

He shook his head, sighing. "I don't think you'd like it much though...."

There was silence for a few moments as I fiddled nervously with a button on my cushion and Josef tapped his hand repeatedly on the arm of his chair. 

I looked up. "Josef... why do I even have to feed fresh? If Mick had turned me....." I paused as tears came almost instantly to my eyes and I rapidly blinked them away, ".... I mean he doesn't even feed fresh himself....." 

"Yes... but Mick didn't turn you Beth."

I gulped.

He leaned forward, his hard gaze softening a bit at the look on my face, "Besides.... Mick did feed fresh for many years after he was first turned by Coraline. It was only after Coraline pulled her little kidnapping stunt, and he was forced to get a fiery divorce, that he decided to punish himself for being the monster he seemed to think he was." He raised his eyebrows, "Trust me Beth, Mick once enjoyed feeding fresh every bit as much as I do."

I looked down at my hands, remembering the sight of Mick, his mouth closed around Simone's wrist, her head thrown back as she moaned her pleasure.

Josef carried on when I didn't reply. "Sorry to be blunt... but there's no way I'm allowing a fledgling of mine to live a miserable existence getting by on bagged blood alone."

A knock on the door sounded and both Josef and I turned to stare at it. Before Josef could say anything the door opened and a head peered around it, one black ringed eyed regarding us questioningly, the other hidden by a long fringe of straight black hair.

"Okay to come in?" Her voice was soft and feminine, completely unlike her appearance.

"Rachael!" Josef's sounded overjoyed to see her. "Come on in..." He waved at one of the armchairs, ".... sit down."

I tried not to stare, but it was hard not to when her whole appearance seemed geared up to gain maximum shock impact. Black leather, chains, black nail polish, and various piercings, coupled with make-up that made her look like one of the walking dead. She sat down next to me, and once again I was immediately aware of the strong scent of her blood, drifting to my nostrils like a strong perfume. I glanced anxiously at Josef, terrified I might be about to vamp out and lose control again.

“Josef……”

He gazed at me calmly. “You’ve just fed Beth…don’t panic…it’ll be fine.”

Slightly reassured by Josef’s calm response I turned back to Rachael, who was watching me with intense interest.

It was a strange moment as our eyes met, no doubt both of us thinking of the last time we'd met out on the upstairs landing under rather different circumstances. The awkward moment was instantly dispersed as her face broke into a huge smile and she held out a black finger nailed hand to me.

"I'm Rachael. Nice to meet you." 

After a moment's hesitation I took her hand, giving it a brief shake. "Beth..." I replied. "The newbie vamp that tried to eat you."

Her eyes sparkled and she let out a delighted laugh. "Yeah... that was a bit weird..."

"Weird really does not do it justice..." I apologised. "....I promise you I have never in my life done anything like that before."

She grinned. "Funnily enough I've never had anything like that happen to me before either...." She glanced sidelong at Josef, a wicked glint in her eye, "...even having lived with Count Dracula for the last six years."

Josef rolled his eyes and shook his head. "That joke is getting old fast...."

I looked at Rachael in earnest. "Rachael.... I'm so sorry about what happened earlier. I really am. I can't even promise it won't happen again, because I had absolutely no intention of doing it in the first place." I grasped about, trying to find the right words to describe what it had been like, "... instinct just kind of took over."

"Honestly Beth... don't worry..." She smiled. "No harm done." 

"Thank you for being so sweet about it. I feel awful." I gazed at her apologetically, grateful only that Josef had intervened before I could do any harm.

Rachael looked from me to Josef almost guiltily. "I have a bit of an apology to make too," she confessed, "I was so freaked out just after it happened.... and I wasn't thinking straight..." she paused, biting her lip nervously, ".... I pretty much blurted out everything that happened in front of Sindy and Barbie..."

Josef sighed, flopping back into his armchair with an air of resignation.

"Sindy and Barbie?" I questioned.

"Chloe and Emily......." Josef clarified, rolling his eyes and shaking his head.

I couldn't help but smile at Rachael's nicknames. They were exactly what I would have chosen if I'd had the audacity.

"Anyway..." she continued, picking at her black nail polish, "...I think I might have frightened them a bit. Helena told me they were getting their little dolly panties in a right bunch after I left."

"She used those exact words did she?" Josef raised an eyebrow.

Rachael shrugged. "Well..."

Josef sighed again, shaking his head. "This isn't your fault Rachael. I should never have allowed it to happen in the first place. I'm the one who should be apologising."

Slightly alarmed, I looked at Josef. "So does this mean all your freshies are now terrified of me?"

He looked back at me reassuringly. "Beth.... don't worry. We'll find you a freshie. It doesn't have to be Chlo or Em. Trust me.... there are plenty of willing donors out there."

Rachael shifted forward throwing Josef a quick glance before turning to me. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about Beth... I thought maybe... " she paused, as though trying to get her thoughts together, "... I thought maybe.... if you wanted to.... " she bit her lip nervously, and I had a sudden inkling of what she was about to say, "... I could be your freshie?"

Josef's eyes snapped to Rachael in alarm. "Whoa..... Rachael! You are not a freshie. That is NOT happening. End. Of. Story." He sounded furious.

I looked on, dumbfounded, as Rachael turned calmly to Josef, totally unfazed by his angry words, fixing him with a steely stare. "It's not up to you Josef. I'm twenty one years old. I'm not a child, and if I want to offer my blood to Beth, then that's my choice. Not yours."

Momentarily speechless, Josef looked ready to combust the way he was glaring at Rachael.

Flabbergasted, I looked from Rachael to Josef and back again, absolutely no idea how to respond. "I ...... er....."

Josef held up a hand to stay whatever I'd been about to say. "Rachael...." His voice was eerily calm, his eyes glittering dangerously. "... I said.... no."

She met his gaze with every bit as much determination. "I wasn't asking you."

I almost laughed at the expression on Josef’s face, but I didn’t dare. He looked ready to kill.

"Beth?" Rachael turned back to me awaiting my response.

Josef launched himself angrily out of his chair, his hand automatically going to his hair, raking it through it in agitation as he began pacing back and forth. "Christ.... could this day get any worse..." he muttered under his breath.

I turned back to Rachael, staring in semi shock at her warm brown eyes gazing back at me with steely determination. I felt like a rabbit caught in the headlights, stunned by her offer and more than a little taken aback by Josef's vehement response. It was the last thing on earth I would have expected her to offer considering what had happened earlier. I remembered the look of abject fear on her face when I'd pinned her to the wall, mixed with some other emotion that I'd been unable to place at the time. Now I wondered if maybe I'd been right in thinking that possibly it wasn't just fear that she'd experienced? Josef was obviously dead set against the idea of Rachael offering me her blood, and I was astounded by the way she'd stood up to his overbearing reaction. He'd be completely and utterly hopping mad if I said yes.

The human side of me was wondering why I was even considering Rachael’s offer. It was wrong on so many levels. Josef obviously looked on her an adopted daughter, and by all accounts Helena and Reni were very protective of her too. What on earth would they think if I accepted? I also had to wonder what had possessed Rachael to make the offer in the first place. She didn’t even know me. If she was just feeling guilty over having scared Chloe and Emily, and was offering simply to make up for her faux pas, then it would be totally wrong of me to say yes. On top of everything else, she was just twenty-one years old, and a freshie virgin. There was no way I could accept.

I was suddenly aware that Josef had stopped pacing and was now gazing at me with a strange kind of horrified anticipation on his face. Rachael seemed to be holding her breath. Two pairs of brown eyes were riveted on me awaiting my response.

Against my better judgement, and for some strange reason that I really couldn't explain, I turned back to Rachael, regarding her strange brown eyes, heavily outlined in thick black make up, and my reply was out of my mouth before I could stop it.

"I accept your offer."

 

_To be continued/..................._


	28. Bite me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Disclaimer: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._
> 
> Rating: This chapter - R
> 
> ###### Full Circle - Beth’s Story
> 
> Chapter 28

_*Jacqui Kostan 2014*_

The scrunch of tyres on the gravel driveway startled me out of my reverie, and instantly I flew to the window to see who was calling at this late hour. With my enhanced vampire eyesight I could easily make out the dark blue Aston Martin parked outside. I was at once absolutely terrified and at the same time so gratefully relieved at the prospect of seeing my mentor again after so much time. Not bothering with niceties such as sedately walking to the front door, I ran from the bedroom and took a flying leap over the gallery banister to land gracefully in the middle of the oak floored hallway below.

Trying in vain to quell the completely unnecessary pounding of my undead heart, I reached a shaking hand to the door and turned the handle to allow the door to swing wide open.

In the moonlight his outline was achingly familiar, his well-built yet slim frame sporting the trademark exquisitely tailored suit, his shock of slickly cut hair framing a handsomely chiseled profile. I had known that seeing him again was going to be hard, but I was totally unprepared for the sudden wave of emotion that lurched up from my stomach to catch in my throat, practically choking me in the process.

His normally laughing brown eyes regarded me with a seriousness I'd rarely before seen, as he opened his arms wide and walked forward to envelop me in a huge bear hug.

"My dear Bethie." Was all he said as I collapsed sobbing into his embrace.

******************

_*Josef's House, 2008*_

_I concentrate on keeping my report succinct, looking earnestly into the camera in what I hope is a professional and no nonsense manner._

_“A promising life cut tragically short. Tonight a killer is on the loose.” I keep my expression deadly serious, hoping to instill an edge of hard hitting journalism into my final words. This is miles away from my usual fluff and I’m so excited to finally be out on a real story that I’m practically chomping at the bit to get out there and solve this mystery._

_“This is Beth Turner for Buzzwire. Cut!”_

_Steve gives me the thumbs up and I’m surprised, although pleased, that it’s a wrap on the first attempt._

_“Really? I was okay?” I raise my eyebrows dubiously._

_He’s already lowering the camera and making ready to leave so I guess he must be serious._

_“Oh yeah. Total Amanpour. I mean, no one would even know it was your first live web cast.”_

_Not wasting any time I hastily unclip the sound gear from my shirt and yank the battery pack from the waistband of my jeans._

_“We gotta get a shot of the body.” My mind is racing ahead as I absentmindedly thrust the gear into his hand, eager to get going._

_He shakes his head. “Nah, the cops won't let anyone get close.”_

_Cops aren’t going to stop me. Not when I’m on a roll. I will be getting that shot, and the look I give Steve is pure newshound in its determination._

_“I'm not leaving without my money shot.”_

_Suddenly I realise how that sounds. “Oh my God, did I just say that?”_

_Steve just smiles, looking totally unsurprised. “Yeah…”_

_“I've become a news whore overnight!” I am actually a little perturbed, but I’m too caught up in the moment to give it much thought._

_Steve’s expression is amused. “Not overnight.” He smiles._

_The sound of a car door slamming attracts my attention and I spy Lieutenant Carl emerging from a vehicle and heading towards the action. Steve forgotten, I’m instantly running in Carl’s direction._

_“Lieutenant Carl!” I fall into step beside him. “ Come on, what can you tell me?”_

_He looks irritated, throwing me an impatient look. “Let's see Beth...nothing!”_

_His annoyance rolls off me like water off a duck’s back. I’m like a terrier down a burrow and nothing is going to stop me from reaching my goal._

_“Come on, I was first on scene.”_

_He remains steely faced. That angle is clearly not going to work so I change tack._

_“Who fed you the location on the 10/7 freeway shooter?”_

_He relents. “Alright, fine. We think she's a Hearst college student. She had a mask and a tattoo on a very discrete part of her anatomy.”_

_My mind is already racing. Get as much information as possible. Piecing it together can be done later.._

_“Front or back?” I ask._

_He’s not listening. The arrival of a news van is demanding his attention as he moves to head them off._

_“Not these guys…” he mutters, turning to shout at them. “Get that camera out of here! Get these cameras out of here, now, move it!”_

_They take about as much notice of his rebuff as I did, the reporter hailing him hopefully._

_“Lieutenant!”_

_I take the opportunity to make my escape, eyeing up the fountain and the body lying prone at its centre. Reaching down to unbuckle my sandals I quickly slip them off and roll up my jeans. It’s a splash fountain so the water is not deep. Holding my shoes in one hand I step into the shallow, but freezing cold, water, and stride through it with purpose, my gaze fixed on the female form, recumbent on the wet stone._

_The Scientific Investigation Division is photographing the body as I arrive on the scene. Nobody challenges me. Maybe they saw me talking with Lieutenant Carl and assume I’m police? Whatever the reason I need to be quick before someone cottons on. My cell phone is already out and poised at the ready._

_The girl is lying on her back, sprawled almost elegantly, if such a thing can be said of a dead body. Her slim form is wrapped in a swathe of pink, leaving her legs and finely toned midriff exposed. Her arms are out at her sides, elbows at right angles and long legs slightly apart and bent at the knees. Her face is thankfully turned away from me. I take a quick shot of her body, my attention focusing in on an area of her exposed neck. Her long brunette hair is draped neatly over one shoulder, revealing a stark bloody mark on the otherwise flawless creamy skin. Dead centre in the bloody smear are two perfectly round puncture marks, and my brow furrows as my mind tries to make sense of what weapon could have caused such a strange looking injury._

_Quickly I take another snapshot, zooming in on the strange holes with growing curiosity. A weird thought comes to mind. If I didn't know better I'd have thought the girl had been drained by a vampire. But everyone knows there's no such things as vampires don't they?  
My musings are abruptly cut short by a shout from Lieutenant Carl, who has clearly finished dealing with the press and is now back to checking up on the other pain in the ass reporter, namely me._

_"Beth! Step away from the body."_

_I start guiltily and quickly begin to walk away. No need to piss Carl off when I already have what I came for. I just need to think of a good headline for my story and it’s pretty much a wrap._

_Swinging my sandals as I walk, I try out some possibilities. “Murder on Melrose...no...,” far too boring. “Southland student slain. Eh...” They sound too ‘normal’ for want of a better word. This murder definitely has something of a supernatural quality about it. Those marks…._

_A light goes on in my head. “Vampire!” Did I really just say that out loud? That certainly ought to get people’s attention. “Something with vampire in it…..” I mutter, so pre-occupied with trying to think of the perfect caption that I almost walk straight into him._

_My eyes travel upwards from the sturdy tan boots, over the strongly muscled legs, clad in tight-fitting, faded blue jeans, and flick to the handsome, yet also somehow familiar face. A pair of dark, grey-green eyes gaze warmly back at me, and I suddenly feel certain I’ve met him before._

_“Do I know you?”_

_A whisper of a smile shows around his full lips, and his expressive eyes stare into mine with a tenderness that makes me think I must be right. You wouldn’t look at a stranger like that, would you?_

_His answer only serves to confuse me even more._

_“You tell me.”_

_For a moment I scrutinize him, taking in the dark, wavy hair, curling just above the turned up collar of his black jacket. Dark stubble covers the lower half of his face, and there’s a very cute dimple right in the middle of his chin. Strong dark brows arch above those beautiful, sparkling eyes. Surely I can’t have forgotten a man this stunning?_

_“You're a cop, right?” I’m clutching at straws._

_He smiles like he’s enjoying this. “No.”_

_So he’s wants me to guess? I have another go._

_“Reporter?” I ask, though he looks nothing like one._

_“Nope.”_

_Well I kind of knew that already, but my brain’s having trouble pinning a name to the face. I know I’ve met this man before._

_“We've met before, you look very familiar.” It’s a statement. Not a question._

_“Well, maybe I've just got one of those faces.”_

_I gaze at him a moment longer, noting the grey Henley, and the thick silver chain about his neck, disappearing into the nest of dark hair peeking out from under his shirt. Maybe he’s right? Perhaps he does just have one of those faces? I shake my head slightly to clear it._

_“Okay. Question: what do you like better? 'Vampire slaying rocks L.A.-'”_

_Now he definitely looks amused, his face softening into an indulgent smile.“There's no such thing as vampires.” He states it like I’m some sort of idiot._

_Well he obviously hasn’t seen what I just saw or he wouldn’t be saying that. I turn around, my eyes fixing on the prone body of the woman, lying sprawled at the centre of the fountain._

_“I don't think the girl in the fountain would agree.” I state, turning back to him._

_“I mean…” My voice cuts off abruptly as I realise he isn’t there anymore._

_Empty space._

_He’s just..._

_Gone._

_I whirl around. He must be here somewhere?_

_Nothing._

_Panic starts to set in as I continue to spin around, scanning the surrounding scene for some sign of him. Where could he have gone? He was only just standing there?_

_A breeze suddenly whips my hair around my face, and the chill wind makes me shiver. The palm trees in the distance start to wave and blow about, and all at once fear grips me as I realise I’m all alone in the clearing._

_“Mick!”_

_I’m looking around, desperately scanning the area for someone. Where did everyone go? Only the body of the dead woman still lies unmoving behind a curtain of cascading water. Why did they leave her here?_

_“Mick!”_

_I go to take a step forward, but something holds my arm back._

_“Mick!” This time it’s a scream of terror._

_I struggle uselessly against the unseen force holding me back._

_“No! I have to find him!” I’m battling with all my might now, trying to yank my arm free. But the harder I try, the less I seem able to move._

_“Please!” I’m begging someone but I have no idea who. “Please let me go!”_

_He’s out there somewhere, I know. Out of my reach, somewhere in the darkness beyond. My eyes scan the wildly waving trees, blowing in the distance._

_“Miiiiiiiiick!” It’s a howl of terror and desperation as I fight futilely to be free from my bonds._

_(“Beth!”)_

_I’m crying now. Falling to my knees on the freezing cold concrete, feeling the icy chill of the water beginning to seep into my jeans._

_(“Beth!”)_

_I realise, in horror, as the moisture soaks into the cloth, that it’s not water, but blood. Thick, dark, red blood. As I raise my head to look for the source, a pale arm moves from behind the curtain of water, raising the body into a sitting position. Her green gown billows around her, shades of emerald, moss and jade mingling together as the wind whips it around her pale limbs._

_She looks straight at me. “You’re the killer Beth….” Her dark, empty eyes bore into mine as cascades of water plaster her chestnut hair to her head, washing blood from the two perfectly round puncture marks to mingle into the pool below._

_“No!" It can't be me! "I didn't mean it! I didn't......." Oh my God!_

_"Murderer!" She screams._

_"No!" I'm trying to cover my ears, but as I move my hands something jerks my left wrist back as though it’s caught on something. I try in vain to tug it free but it won’t move, and I can't shut her out. "Let me go!"_

_(“Beth…….you're safe…..I’ve got you….”)_

_“Nooooooooooo!” I scream._

_(“Beth…it's okay......you're just dreaming…")_

_Fingers close around mine and I practically go into berserker mode - struggling like a wildcat to free myself from my captor._

_"Let me go!"_

_Strong arms tighten around me and something's pinning my legs down so I can barely move. I struggle helplessly._

_"I HAVE to find him!" My desperate plea ends in a pathetic sob. "PLEASE....... I have to...."_

_("Beth...wake up.......")_

_"I've got to find him.....” I wail, “…he was just here......" My mind fogs as I try to remember where 'here' was. I frown as the details seem to slip from my mind like water through a sieve._

_"He.......he can't have gone far.....?"_

_(".... wake up Beth.......you're having a dream.......")_

"Wha....?" Suddenly a pair of warm, brown eyes comes into focus and for a moment I'm lost in the in between. Part way from dream to reality, my thoughts not quite in phase with my physical self. I have no idea where I am or what's going on. For a few seconds I just stare uncomprehending, at a loss to understand why I’m being held down, or why those eyes are regarding me so intensely. 

Recognition dawns with a slowly creeping awareness.

Josef?

Then all of a sudden it all rushes in, crashing down on me like a ton of bricks.

Mick is gone.

Simone is dead.

And me......

.....

Oh God.......

***************

"You were thrashing around......" Josef stated, by way of explanation as to why he was half lying on top of me, his hands pinning my wrists to the mattress. ".....and I'm running out of duct tape....." He raised an apologetic eyebrow, adding as an afterthought. "....for the repairs."

"Mick's gone." I stated numbly, the chilling eeriness of the dream still haunting me as I gazed hopelessly into Josef's concerned eyes.

“Beth...it was just a dream." Something about the intense way he looked at me instantly calmed me down, pushing back the darkness that had been threatening to engulf me.

I frowned, remembering that awful moment when I'd turned back to fine Mick gone. “He just vanished......." I was half talking about the dream, half about the reality of what had actually happened. 

The look of uncertainty in Josef’s brown eyes betrayed the conviction in his voice as he stared at me. “We’re going to look for him….and if he’s out there…” he paused, fixing me with a look of resolve, “…and I really do believe he is, we will find him Beth.”

I so wanted to believe him. "How can you be sure?"

Josef looked down for a moment, his brow furrowing, as though considering what to say, before finally raising his eyes back to mine. "I just ........ know. You'll have to trust me on this one."

“Okay?” His eyes bored into mine as he awaited confirmation from me.

I took a deep breath. “Okay…”

Josef nodded, looking at me for a few seconds more before moving to the side and releasing the lower half of my body from where he’d pinned me to the bed with his weight. I struggled to raise myself up, reaching down the side of the bed for the release catch, somewhat surprised when Josef jerked and fell inelegantly into my lap.

“What the hell….?” I stared in amazement at the stainless steel handcuffs linking our wrists together. “Did we somehow get arrested while we were sleeping?” I stared at Josef in confusion.

He raised a guilty eyebrow and shrugged at me from his prone position. “Couldn’t risk you getting up in the night for another bathroom visit. Humans they may be, but I’m very fond of some of them and it’s the height of bad manners to let one’s newtie dine willy-nilly on the staff.”

I was momentarily struck speechless, gazing at him dumbly. I couldn't quite believe he'd cuffed me to him like some common criminal. The audacity of it. How dared he!?

"How did you even.....?" I just shook my head, flabbergasted.

For a few seconds we simply looked at one another. Me, glaring angrily in disbelief, and Josef doing his best to look apologetic. Then quite suddenly my anger dissipated like smoke in the wind as I saw the funny side of it. I began to laugh, my whole body shaking as waves of mirth contracted my stomach over and over.

Josef’s face instantly broke into a smile and I laughed even harder just to see him looking happy. Soon he was laughing too and we both collapsed in helpless giggles.

“Oh my God Josef…… why do you even have handcuffs?” I managed to get out in between fits of laughter. “No wait… don’t answer that. I really don’t want to know.”

His snickers subsiding, he gave me a sidelong glance and raised a curious eyebrow. “Beth, I hate to dispel your illusions about me, but bondage really isn’t my thing. I borrowed these from my head of security…” He cracked a mischievous closed lip smile. “….obviously.”

"And what on earth is a 'newtie' ?" I enquired between giggles.

"Newly 'T'urned." My hand was jerked upwards as he made quotation marks in the air.

I shot him a meaningful stare. "You are so not calling me that."

He reached behind him with his free hand and released the lid catch. "Come on Newtie, Alex will be arriving soon. Showers to be had. People to see. Time is money. Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera." He gave me a cheeky smirk.

I scowled at him. "I hope you remember where you put the key."

**************

Showered, hair washed, and dressed in a very well fitting pair of jeans and turquoise blue shirt (I had to admire Helena's shopping skills), I sat in the large armchair in Josef's study, flicking idly through Cosmopolitan magazine. An article entitled '1-2-3 Steps to figure out your future faster' caught my eye. I wondered idly if they'd catered to the available opportunities for newly turned vampires when they wrote the piece, before moving swiftly on to 'Hot Tips for Hot Lips'.

Josef was ensconced behind an enormous oak desk, a beautiful antique incongruously laden with the most up to date technology money could buy. I could hear him muttering frustratedly under his breath as he tapped, rather more loudly than necessary, at the keyboard. He should really have been at the office today, but was working from home in order to babysit his new charge. Except for use of the bathroom facilities, he'd not let me out of his sight since the moment he'd unlocked the handcuffs. I'd been dutifully 'fed' every two hours whether I liked it or not, and I was beginning to feel like a rescued animal being bottle fed after its mother died.

Right on cue Josef's watch beeped and he got out of his chair to retrieve another flask from the mini fridge.

"Josef...... I really don't think this is necessary." I pleaded. "I don't feel in the slightest bit hungry. Can't you just leave it on the table next to me and I'll drink it as soon as I feel the urge to bite someone?"

"No." Resolutely he held the flask out to me. "You'll drink it now."

"Did anyone ever tell you what a complete and utter control freak you are?" I complained, accepting the proffered the flask with a grimace.

He gave me a scathing look. "Yes. I think they're currently lounging at the bottom of La Brea Tar Pits."

For the fourth time so far today I felt the weird sensation of suddenly having a mouthful of fangs and realised that maybe I was a little hungrier than I'd thought. "Is there ever going to be a day when I can control this?" I lisped at Josef, despairing of ever being able to live a normal life again.

In answer Josef swiped the flask from my hands and inhaled deeply. I caught a brief flash in his eyes that was gone before I could be sure it had ever been there, then he was handing the flask back to me and flashing me a rare toothy smile. "Look, no fangs! Does that answer your question?"

"But how long did it take you to get to that point Josef? I don't have the patience to wait four hundred years!"

He raised a sarcastic eyebrow. "Yeah...cause I only learned this trick yesterday."

My woebegone expression must have gotten to him because his face instantly softened.

"Months maybe? Weeks if you're lucky." His expression was sympathetic and uncharacteristically serious.

"But how do I do it Josef? How can I stop it happening?"

He shrugged. "I really don't know. It's not something I can explain, it just kind of comes to you."

I gave a resigned sigh, lifting the flask and draining its contents obediently.

A knock on the door has us both turning simultaneously, Josef in the direction of the sound, and me in the opposite direction, automatically hiding my face and willing my fangs and eyes back to normal. Amazingly I felt my fangs disappear and was so surprised it had worked I actually had to feel my teeth just to be sure. Maybe Josef was right about it just coming to me after all?

Turning back towards the door I saw Helena's auburn head peering around it. "Alexander's arrived Josef. Would you like me to show him in?" 

Before Josef could answer, Helena let out a high pitched scream, and, almost as one, both Josef and I surged towards to door, ready to save her from some unknown threat.

We needn't have bothered, watching as her face broke into an embarrassed smile, colour rising to her cheeks as two large hands encircled her waist and a wickedly grinning face appeared over her shoulder. With his shock of gunmetal grey hair, and somewhat weathered looking face, I judged him to be somewhere in his mid to late sixties.

"Alexander..... I see you've re-aquatinted yourself with my P.A. " Josef regarded the newcomer through narrowed eyes. "Perhaps you could put her down now?"

Oblivious to Josef's scolding, Alexander turned to a very flustered looking Helena, raising her hand to his lips and kissing her hand reverently. "I beg the lady's pardon. I hope we shall be able to spend some more time together during my visit?"

His British accent was very pronounced and a delight to my ears. I'd loved watching old black and white movies as a child, and he sounded just like the stiff upper lip actors in the British films I'd watched.

Helena's cheeks turned a deeper shade of pink if that was possible, smiling a wary grin at Alexander. 

"Yes...... I'm sure we will." She stammered before making a hasty exit.

"What a marvelous woman!" Exclaimed Alexander, looking after her admiringly as she all but ran down the hallway, her auburn hair flying in her wake. As she disappeared around the corner he turned his attention back to us.

"Charles old boy!" He declared, turning to Josef and clapping him on the back. "You haven't aged a day!" Then, advancing towards me. "And who might this charming young woman be?"

I took a couple of involuntary steps backwards as Alexander barreled towards me, glancing sidelong at Josef for help. 

Josef shoved his hand in his pockets, rolling his eyes at Alexander's obvious enthusiasm. "This is Beth Turner, newly turned by my good self just a couple of days ago." He raised a sardonic eyebrow. "And it's Josef if you don't mind. I haven't been Charles for over half a century now."

"Josef.... of course.... of course..." Alexander seemed barely to be listening as his focused his attention on me. Deep brown eyes surveyed me almost as though he was lining me up for his next conquest. It was quite alarming in one way, but flattering at the same time. Despite his age, Alexander was a very handsome and distinguished looking man. From what I could see from the way he filled his very expensive looking suit, he was also in very good shape for a man of his advanced years. Moreover, he simply oozed charm from every pore. I was beginning to feel mesmerised under his blatant stare.

"Not your usual type old boy....." He mused. ".... but absolutely stunning." He took my hand, never taking his eyes from mine as he raised it to his lips and bestowed a soft kiss against my fingertips. "Enchante mademoiselle." He purred.

I gazed up at him, completely enthralled, the power of speech having temporarily deserted me. I shook my head to break the spell and belatedly remembered my manners.

"It's lovely to meet you too." I smiled.

Still holding my left hand he glanced at my fingers with a raised eyebrow and turned a questioning look at Josef. "You're not yet engaged to be married?" When his gaze turned back to me there was a slightly more predatory gleam to them and my eyes widened in alarm. "Still courting you is he my dear?"

Josef came to stand at my side, putting a protective arm around my shoulders and gave Alexander an exasperated look. "Nobody's courting and nobody's getting married. Beth's not mine Alexander. She belongs to someone else."

" 'Belongs' ?" I did a double-take at Josef's choice of words.

Josef ignored me, but I felt his hand tighten on my shoulder.

Almost instantaneously Alexander's stare turned from predatory to warm and twinkling as he looked inquiringly from Josef to me and back again. "My apologies.." He directed at me. "...I misunderstood..... This 'someone else' did not wish to turn you himself?" He looked bemused.

"It's complicated." I told him, reluctant to launch into a full explanation.

For a few moments we all looked at each other in silence before Josef broke the moment.  
"Come Alex...." Josef waved him forward, steering me towards the nearest armchair and depositing me there as he indicated that Alexander should also take a seat. "...you've had a long journey and I'm sure you must be in need of some refreshment?"

We sat down, eyeing each other speculatively as Josef fetched a decanter and glasses.  
"Scotch?" Josef asked as he set the glasses on the table.

"Yes please." Alexander and I said in unison.

Josef raised a surprised eyebrow, pouring my glass first, then filling his and Alexander's before returning to the drinks cabinet to retrieve another flask.

"A-positive chaser ok?" He directed at Alexander.

"No on tap refreshment available old boy?" Alexander looked disappointed.

"Erm...... Beth's not been introduced to that pleasure yet, so alright if we stick to this for now?"

Alexander looked surprised but nodded his acceptance as Josef proceeded to top up our glasses. When they were all filled he held up his glass in a toast and we clinked glasses together.

"Bottoms up!" Declared Alexander, proceeding to down his in one.

Josef grinned. "Bottoms up!" He replied, tossing his back in one gulp as well.

Well, in for a penny, in for a pound I thought, smiling in spite of myself. "Bottoms up!" I toasted, almost choking as I chugged my drink back and instantly vamped out.

I still couldn't get used to the sudden change in my vision, staring in ill-concealed wonder at the two vampires gazing back at me. In vampire Technicolor, Josef's eyes gleamed like pools of golden chocolate, speckled with flecks of yellow and Amber. Turning my gaze to Alexander I was surprised to see an identical pair of iridescent eyes staring back at me. The sudden resemblance between them struck me like a bolt out of the blue. Even the way they were both leaning forward in their chairs, elbows resting on their spread knees in identical stances was just so alike. It was unnerving to say the least.

Both Josef and Alexander had briefly vamped out as they downed their blood laced drinks, but they'd changed back almost immediately. Not so for me. I squeezed my eyes shut, willing myself to turn back. Nothing. Cracking on eyelid open it was obvious I was still in vamp mode. I quickly shut it again.

"I'm never going to be able to go out until I work out how to change back am I?" I whined, attempting through force of will to make my fangs go back to wherever they came from.

"Beth..." I felt a hand reach out and grasp mine. "Try to concentrate on somebody you love. Your mother, father, a beloved pet maybe? Don't think about anything else. Just try to see that person in your mind. See their face. See their love for you written on their face and just concentrate on that."

Immediately I was back in my apartment, that night I thought I'd lost Mick's forever. It felt like my whole world had ended. I remembered that awful feeling of desolation when he'd walked out that door. But he'd come back. I would never forget that look on his face the first time he told me he loved me.

I opened my eyes to find Josef kneeling at my side, a slightly pained look in his now chocolate brown eyes.

"Okay Beth?" He was looking at me somewhat warily.

I stared at him. Not really…no. Okay would be having Mick here with me. Okay would be not being a vampire. Okay would be the last three days never having happened in the first place. I so desperately wanted to turn back time and go back to that perfect place before where it all suddenly went wrong.

I took a deep breath, reaching up a hand to check my teeth, already knowing I was back in human face. I gave him a shaky smile. "All good here...."

He winced. "Do you think I could have my hand back then?"

I glanced down at the hand I was currently crushing between my fingers and attempted to relax my grip. The pained look in his eyes receded as he gently eased his hand out of my grasp.

Reaching for the decanter, Josef poured me another large glass of Scotch. "Here..." He placed it in my hand and gave me a reassuring smile before sitting back down in his chair.

I looked down at my drink, swirling it around in the glass thoughtfully. "Can I get drunk on this stuff or am I immune now that I'm a vampire?"

"Drink enough of it and you could probably get merry, but alcohol doesn't affect vamps to anywhere near the degree if affects humans. The only way you can really get drunk is to drink directly from a human with alcohol in their bloodstream." Josef raised his eyebrows at me. "But I think we'll leave that lesson for another day..."

Alexander had remained quiet throughout, but seemed to be watching the interaction between Josef and me with interest. Now, in the sudden silence, he spoke up.

"So... Josef.... would you like to explain the circumstances in which you came to turn Miss Turner? And why my services as babysitter are required?"

Josef poured himself another glass of Scotch and leaned back in his chair. "First things first Alexander..... I think some proper introductions are in order here."

Before Josef could continue, I interrupted him. "Are you two related? You look very alike."  
Josef went as if to say something then closed his mouth. Alexander looked from me to Josef and back again. They turned to one another, something unspoken passing between them, then turned back to face me as one.

"We're twins." They stated.

****************************

"Twins?" I gaped stupidly.

Josef rolled his eyes. "Yes 'twins'. You have heard of the phenomenon I presume?"

Alexander just laughed.

I was confused. "But...... but..... how can you be twins? You're........ " Even as I said it realisation dawned. Of course. They were turned at different times.

"Yes. Exactly." Josef nodded.

I turned to Alexander. "I thought maybe you were Josef's father?"

He nearly spat out his drink. "Saints preserve us!"

Josef grinned. "He's actually younger than me. Only by a few minutes, but I'm the older brother."

I turned back to Alexander. "But you're British?" I was still baffled. "... and Josef's American?"

"My dear..... both Josef and I were born in England. Josef didn't emigrate to the Americas until sometime around 1800 I believe?" He turned to Josef for confirmation.

"It was 1795." Josef supplied. "The Reign Of Terror in Europe had vampires flooding into the south of England to escape the witch hunters." He shrugged. "It seemed as good a time as any to make a fresh start in a new land."

I turned to Alexander. "And you stayed behind?"

"My dear, England is my home. Always was, always will be." He grinned. "Besides, the weather over there is so much more vampire friendly. I don't know how Josef puts up with all this constant sunshine." He shook his head vehemently. "Perfectly dreadful stuff as I'm sure you'll find out for yourself soon enough."

Josef flashed me a quick closed-lipped smile. "Anyway..... we digress..."

"Yes...." Alexander sat forward in his chair, looking first at me, then Josef. ".... now we all know who I am, could someone please explain what I'm doing here?"

Josef paused, glancing at me to check I was happy with him telling the story, before turning to Alexander with a sigh. "To cut a long story short, three days ago I threw a party for my girlfriend, Simone." He paused and I could see him visibly steeling himself to go on. "It didn't go well..... Beth got shot, my girlfriend died in an explosion, Beth's boyfriend, Mick, disappeared in the chaos, and I ended up turning Beth before she died. Mick is still missing and there seems to be some sort of problem with Beth and me exchanging blood. She almost attacked Rachael yesterday and I barely managed to stop her." He looked at Alexander imploringly. "The crux of the matter is that I don't feel confident in my ability to control Beth. And the last thing I want is her going rogue on me." With a small smile he raised his eyebrows and cocked a finger at Alexander. "That's where you come in."

Alexander was silent for a few moments, letting the information sink in, then he leaned forward and stretched out an arm to rest on Josef's shoulder. "I'm sorry about your girlfriend Jimmy."

Josef reached up to cover his brother's hand with his own, his face contorting with effort as he struggled to hold his emotions in check. Finally giving his brother's hand a gentle pat he rose from his chair and began to pace the floor.

Changing the subject, Alexander gestured toward me, looking me up and down appraisingly. "Beth doesn't look very rogue to me old boy. I think you're doing yourself an injustice here."

"Apart from mine, Beth's drunk nothing but bottled blood since she's been here Alex." Josef snapped. "I'm feeding her every two hours just to keep the hunger in check, but it can't go on! Beth needs to learn how to feed from a freshie and I'm afraid I can't teach her that!" His voice was rising in panic.

"You said something about a problem with you and Beth exchanging blood.... what did you mean exactly?" Alexander's voice was calm.

Josef put a hand to his forehead, pinching between his brows as if almost in pain. "When Beth was about to attack Rachael I used my blood to distract her." He looked at Alexander, embarrassed. "I was so overwhelmed when she started to drink from me, that I practically passed out and let her drain me dry."

"Overwhelmed in what way exactly?" Alexander looked curious.

"Um..... " Josef ran his hand over his face tiredly. "......it's kind of hard to explain...."

Alexander gave Josef a pointed look. "Try....."

Josef knitted his brows and began stroking his hair back and forth in what I now recognised as a nervous gesture. "I don't know exactly...... just happy I guess?"

"Happy?" Alexander looked nonplussed.

"Well...." Josef stroked his finger over his bottom lip, his eyes moving nervously. "...you know....very happy."

Alexander's eyebrows shot up. "In a sexual way?"

"God no!" Josef and I both exclaimed at the same time.

"Very happy in an ‘at peace and serene’ sort of way..." Josef clarified. "....although it was kind of exhilarating at the same time...." He looked embarrassed. "I just sort of forgot myself for a moment. Well....quite a long moment."

"Four hundred years old and you just forgot yourself?" Alexander looked at Josef in disbelief. He nodded in my direction. "What was the experience like for you?"

"It just felt amazing. Basically what Josef said and more." I struggled to find the right words to describe it. "Like I was drinking pure energy."

"Go on...." Prompted Alexander.

"Well.....I don't really remember much until something smashed into the wall behind me...."

"Helena threw a vase....." Josef interjected.

Alexander's face lit up. "Marvelous woman..........what an absolute treasure she is." He nodded his head approvingly.

"It was quite an expensive vase...." Josef smiled.

I explained what had happened from thereon in and Alexander listened with great interest, occasionally stroking his chin and casting curious glances in Josef's direction. When I finished he was quiet for a few moments, mulling over the information.

"So your security guards had to pull you off?" He seemed astounded.

Josef looked ashamed. "I couldn't stop Alex." He looked thoughtful for a moment. "I suppose it could have been due to my weakened state, but that doesn't explain why I let Beth drain me dry in the first place. But more to the point, I couldn't even think of stopping when Beth fed me. I wasn't really aware of what I was doing."

Alexander's face was a picture of aghast, appalled, and disbelief.

"Are you serious old boy?"

"Deadly." Josef's expression was grave.

Alexander thought for a moment and raised an eyebrow. "So I take it I'm the Guinea pig then?"

"Well...." Josef looked sheepish.

Alexander looked dubious, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

"How am I supposed to teach Beth what she needs to know if we can't share blood?" Josef looked desperate. "What if she has that effect on everyone she drinks from?" His voice went up several octaves. "She'll kill every freshie she touches in seconds!"

I listened to the exchange between them with growing anxiety. Up until that point it hadn't really dawned on me how unusual a reaction it had been.

"But it's not just Beth is it?" Alexander frowned. "You had the same effect on her?"

"Exactly!" Josef threw his hands in the air. "Beth I could maybe have put down to her being newly turned, but me....... that definitely shouldn't have happened." He shook his head. "I even had one of my security guards keep watch when Chloe came to my office for my nine o'clock last night, just in case I lost control and drained her!" Josef dropped to his knees in front of Alexander, raising imploring eyes to his. "Please bro!"

"I take it you didn't?"

Josef looked confused for a moment. "What? Oh..... er.... no...... it was fine. Just like normal."

Alexander looked over at me, a cheeky smile sneaking round the corners of his mouth as he gazed down at the still kneeling Josef. "Well this is a first..... "

"Alex please...." Josef's voice sounded desperate.

A wicked gleam entered Alexander's eyes. "Will you put in a good word with Helena for me?"

"What?" Josef looked incredulous. "Yes..... whatever."

Alexander's eyes shone with laughter. "Excellent old boy, then we have a deal!"

I cleared my throat loudly, interrupting their exchange.. "Excuse me, but there are three of us here........ " I glanced at Alexander. "..... if you're the Guinea pig, what exactly does that make me?"

Josef looked at me apologetically. "We have to try this out Beth. If you two can exchange blood without any strange effects then at least we'll know that whatever happened with us was......" He shrugged. ".....well I don't know what it was, but at least we'll know it wasn't just you."

He was right. I knew that. But Josef had a way of just expecting everyone to do as he wished, regardless of their thoughts on the matter. And drinking from his brother, who I'd barely known for five minutes, wasn't high on my wish list right at the moment. There was also the distinct possibility that something could go wrong and I'd end up harming him in some way. On the other hand, if this was going to help get me on the road to getting out of this house so I could search for Mick, then that had to be a good thing.

I poured myself another glass of Scotch (I was really getting quite addicted to the liquor) and gave Alexander a businesslike look. "So how do you want to do this?"

Josef held up a hand whilst digging in his pocket for his cellphone. "Hold fire. I want to get some extra security in here just in case of an emergency."

While he was on the line to his security staff, Alexander and I nursed our glasses of Scotch and regarded each other rather warily. I guess it must have seemed just as strange to him as it did to me. I was praying things would go normally, although I didn't really know what exactly 'normal' was, since my experience in the field was limited. Before Josef, I'd only ever been on the receiving end of a vampire bite as a human. Except for the first time, the experiences with Mick had mainly been sensual and highly sexual. The sexual part, especially with Josef's younger brother, was the thing that was bothering me most. Being new to the whole vampire thing, casual sex through blood sharing just did not come naturally to me.

"Have you known Josef long?"

The question startled me momentarily . "Oh......um...... about a year."

Alexander nodded. "How did the two of you meet?"

"He and my boyfriend, Mick, were......." I gulped, correcting my statement. "...are...... best friends."

Alexander nodded. "Yes....... I've heard of the talented Mick St. John. An excellent detective and a superb fighter by all accounts?"

I nodded. "Yes....he....is..."

Thankfully Josef returned at that moment, saving me from any further questions. "Luke and Tobias will be arriving at any moment so we'll be good to go."

I undid the buttons on my shirt cuffs and began nervously rolling up my sleeves in preparation. Alexander stood up, shrugging off his suit jacket to reveal a snugly fitting crisp pinstripe shirt beneath, and began to remove his cuff links. I tried not to, but it was hard not to stare at the well-defined muscles, flexing and rippling beneath the thin cotton as he moved. His body was certainly not what I would have expected of a man his age.

A knock sounded on the door and Josef shouted a sharp "Come!"

The two vampire security guards entered and situated themselves discreetly at the opposite end of the room, doing that well schooled security guard trick of managing to look everywhere but at the people they were watching.

Josef joined us and indicated that we were now good to go.

I nervously held out my arm in Alexander's direction. "So how do you want to do this?"

To my surprise, Alexander looked as nervous as I did. "My freshies would normally sit in my lap...." My eyes widened. "...... but I think we'll do this standing if that alright with you?"

I stood up gratefully. "Sounds good to me...."

He moved somewhat awkwardly towards me, stopping about a foot away. His warm brown eyes, so like Josef's, regarded me warily, and I hoped to God this wasn't all about to go horribly wrong. I still couldn't get the idea out of my head that what had happened with Josef wasn't somehow all my fault. I threw him a panicked look.

"Josef, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Beth, I really don't know how else we're going to find out what's going on. I can't risk you biting a human until we're sure you're able to stop before things go too far." He gave me a pointed look. "A human won't recover from being drained."

I knew he was right but I was suddenly starting to get very nervous about what Alexander and I were about to do. What if I embarrassed myself somehow? Having been on the receiving end of several bites from Mick, I was only too aware of how sensual blood sharing could be, and I barely knew Alexander. What if he made me feel things I'd rather not be feeling? Or what if I hurt him accidentally? My mind started spinning with all the scary possibilities.

My hesitation must have shown on my face, because Josef walked forward and gently took hold of my arms. "Beth, I trust Alexander completely." He threw a sideways look at an equally uneasy looking Alexander. "You couldn't be in safer hands, I promise. And if I see any sign of anything going wrong, I'll be here to stop it immediately." He gestured over to the windows, where the two guards were pretending to examine the embroidery on the curtains. "And if for any reason I need backup, my two most trusted security officers are right over there."

I nodded, swallowing nervously, and raised my eyes to Alexander's. "So, do you want to go first?"

His own nervous eyes looked back at me. "Well, normally I'd say ladies first....... but under the circumstances....."

As Josef stepped back, he moved to my side and took hold of my left wrist, his other hand supporting my forearm as he raised it to hover a few inches from his mouth. I couldn't help but hitch in a breath in anticipation. Rotating my arm slightly to expose the soft flesh of the underside, he moved to lightly graze his lips along my skin, inhaling deeply of my scent. Quite suddenly he vamped out, barring a sharp set of fangs as his eyes flashed silver. A long hiss sounded from his lips and a sharp frisson of fear took hold of me as he opened his mouth and sank his teeth into my arm.

I let out an involuntary gasp which was more of a reaction to the surprise rather than pain. Although I could feel his fangs enter my flesh, it didn't really hurt. I gazed, fascinated, at the point where he was attached to my arm, his eyes closed as his mouth began to move rhythmically, his throat working as he drank. Relief began to wash over me as I realised I'd been worried over nothing. This really wasn't as bad as I'd feared. I glanced over at Josef who was watching us avidly, poised to jump in if required.

I smiled at him. "I think it's going to be okay........... ahhhhhh!" Before I could finish my sentence the sudden sensation of Alexander drawing strongly on my arm triggered an intense stab of desire low in my abdomen, and my legs instantly turned to jelly. I closed my eyes, gasping for unneeded breath as the unexpected sensation passed.

I opened my eyes in stunned surprise, gazing straight into Josef's watching ones. "Josef.......is this supposed to be........." My words were once again cut off as another serious of delicious contractions interrupted my train of thought. "Ohhhhhhhhh......" I breathed, my eyes widening in shock. Josef stared back, surreptitiously raising his hand to brush across his mouth in an unsuccessful attempt to hide the smirk beginning to spread over his face.

In between waves of lust, I glared at Josef as he did his best to try to look serious. "Make him stop Josef......." I managed to gasp out, before another wave hit and I let out a long moan of pleasure.

"Are you sure? You look like you're enjoying yourself?" I wanted to kill him as he gave me a mischievous grin. Obviously I was going to have to take this into my own hands.

"Alexander!" I shouted, trying to ignore the wonderful clenching sensations reverberating low in my belly. "Stop!" I tapped him on the back with my other arm to get his attention.

Immediately he withdrew his fangs, laving his tongue once across the wound before his eyes faded back to warm brown. Still holding my hand, he bestowed a brief kiss on the back of it before letting me go. "Thank you my dear, that was delicious." His eyes sparkled with warmth and mischief.

Unable to quite believe what had just transpired, I gazed from Alexander to Josef, and slowly back again. At a loss for words, I took a couple of steps backwards, practically falling into the armchair as the back of my legs collided with the front of it.

I lay, sprawled in the armchair, dumbfounded. Dazedly I watched as the bite mark on my arm healed over right before my eyes.

A glass of Scotch waving in front of my face brought me back to the moment, and I practically snatched it from Josef's hand as I shot him an accusatory stare.

"You knew that was going to happen, didn't you?"

He raised his hands innocently. "Honestly Beth, I had no idea what was going to happen. I'm just glad you were both able to enjoy the experience without a repeat of what happened with the two of us yesterday. All things considered, I think it went very well. Don't you?"

I glared. "Did you know it was going to be like....... " I hesitated, raising my eyebrows in a suggestive way. ".........you know?"

He feigned ignorance. "Like what?"

"So help me Josef, I will sink my fangs into you and drain you dry if you can't be serious for one moment."

He held up in hands in surrender. "Okay, okay...... I knew it was a possibility." He raised apologetic eyes to mine. "But would you still have done it if I'd warned you?"

I thought about it. "Probably not. No."

"Which is why I didn't tell you." He glanced over at Alexander, who promptly picked up the newspaper lying on the table and hid himself behind it. "Alex's skills in that department are quite legendary."

"Shouldn't I be immune from all that now I'm a vampire?" I was confused.

"A vampire's bite works on humans and other vampires alike." He explained. "As a vampire, though, you have more control." He raised his eyebrows. "You were able to tell him to stop."

I thought back to the previous day and how it had felt when Josef drank from me. "When you drank my blood I couldn't even have thought of asking you to stop."

He shrugged. "Ditto."

I frowned. "Is it because you're my sire?"

He shook his head. "No....that shouldn't make a difference. For you, my blood will be more powerful and will heal you faster if you need it, but apart from that it shouldn't be any different." He made a flummoxed face. "I don't know ........ maybe it was simply a fluke? Perhaps the emotional overload of our situation just got the better of us?" He was quiet for a moment, a shadow passing over his face, and suddenly I could feel the crushing weight of that situation threatening to overwhelm me again. Before the mood could descend any further, he shook himself and the weight lifted almost immediately. "But let's not go there."

He gestured to Alexander, who appeared deeply immersed in reading his newspaper. "We still have to try this the other way around."

Alexander lowered the paper, peering at us over the top. "I'm ready whenever you are."

I pushed myself out of the armchair. "Okay, let's get this over with."

********************

It wasn't until I was standing in front of Alexander holding his arm in my hands that I realised I still had absolutely no idea how to make myself vamp out.

"Shall I start you off my dear?" Alexander nodded at his arm, starting to raise it to his mouth when Josef stopped him.

"No! It might confuse the results if you do it. I need Beth to do this for herself."

I looked at him apologetically. "I don't know how."

"You really are blonde, aren't you?" He shook his head, reaching behind him for the still half full flask on the table, uncapping it and waving it under my nose.

"Abracadabra! Presto changeo!" Declared Josef, grinning at his own joke.

As soon as the pungent scent reached my nostrils I felt the change flash over me. An involuntary hiss escaped my lips as the world around me took on an extra dimension.  
Alexander's sparkling cinnamon eyes showed just a hint of trepidation as I picked up his arm and raised it to my mouth, mirroring his earlier actions as I inhaled his scent. The action only served to increase the hunger now gnawing at my belly, and with one final look at Alexander, who nodded his assent, I bit down on the soft flesh of his inner arm.

Cool refreshing blood trickled from the bite marks to pool against my tongue, melting like liquid chocolate as I pressed it to the roof of my mouth, savouring the rich golden taste. His blood was delicious. Far superior in every way to the bland, tasteless, bottled blood I'd been drinking, this exploded against my taste buds in a riot of flavour, triggering a rush of endorphins that flooded my senses with delight. Instantly forgetting about experiments and what could go wrong if I got carried away, I thought about nothing but drawing more of this delectable blood into my body as I dug my fangs deeper into Alexander's flesh. I was rewarded for my efforts as the blood began to flow faster, and I eagerly swallowed down mouthful after mouthful. There was a delicate balance of sweetness, coupled with bitterness, a rich satisfying buttery element, and just a hint of summer rain on strawberries. It was nothing short of a feast. Like sitting down to a gourmet dinner after eating nothing but dry crackers for days.

After what seemed like no time at all, Josef's voice interrupted my indulgence. "Beth. I think it's time to stop now."

I opened my eyes, glancing up at him, although I didn't relinquish my hold on Alexander's arm.

He was looking at me rather sternly. "Beth. I said stop drinking."

Something about the tone of his voice made me comply immediately, and I reluctantly withdrew my fangs, careful not to cause any further damage. The temptation to lick the excess blood from Alexander's skin was too much though, and feeling like a naughty child disobeying its mother, I quickly lapped up the last remnants before releasing Alexander's arm.

He looked to be none the worse for wear for his ordeal, although he was looking at me with some amusement, and, if I wasn't mistaken, a little admiration too. He dropped back into his armchair and placed the newspaper he'd been so ensconced in earlier, strategically across his lap. A snort from Josef's direction made me turn my head.

Still in full vamp mode, I gazed at a now helplessly giggling Josef and demanded to know what was so funny.

Attempting to stifle his laughter, Josef pointed to Alexander's lap and smiled. "I think you gave him as good as you got!"

My eyes swiveled back to the aforementioned lap and sudden realisation dawned. If I'd still been human I'm sure my cheeks would have been as red as beetroot.

"But..... but.... I wasn't even thinking about....... you know!" I spluttered, looking from Josef to Alexander in panic.

"You don't have to be." Josef explained. "It's all part of being a vampire. If humans didn't enjoy the experience we'd find it a lot harder to feed. I can't pretend to understand exactly how it works but I do know that the more you enjoy it, the more the person you're drinking from enjoys it. It's all a matter of communication.......... and a little bit of chemistry."

"Chemistry?" I was puzzled.

"You obviously liked the taste of Alexander's blood?"

It seemed odd to be discussing the subject of how someone's blood tasted but I guessed I was going to have to get used to it. "Yes......it was........quite nice."

Alexander stifled a laugh.

"Sometimes..." Josef went on."...... not that often......... you might come across a person whose blood just doesn't taste good. It's usual a matter of degrees though. Some just tastes better than others. It's chemistry, pure and simple."

"So the communication part....how does that work?" I needed to know because there was no way I'd be able to feed from a freshie if I thought it would have that effect very time.

Josef gestured to the chairs, indicating that we should sit. "That's normally something that you learn to refine as you gain experience. The pleasure you feel as you feed is transmitted to the person you're feeding from. It's all a matter of how that pleasure translates........... it might just feel pleasantly 'nice', or maybe blissful, ......other times......" He gestured vaguely, rolling his hands. "...... intensely sexual.........it's kind of hard to explain." He frowned, scratching his head thoughtfully. "Then again.... you might just end up zoning out completely, float off to happy land, forget everything and everyone, lose every semblance of control and allow someone to drain you totally dry." He paused and shook his head. "I really have no idea what I'm talking about do I?"

I shook my head in confusion. "I just need to know how not to make it sexual!"

Josef put his head in his hands. "I don't think I can help you with that Beth. I'm sorry."

Alexander shot Josef a confused look and opened his mouth as if to say something, then appeared to change his mind. He turned to me. "Don't worry Beth, I'm sure we can work on it..."

Josef looked chagrined. "I'm sorry.....I should be able to help."

Before he could continue, a knock at the door interrupted us, and I immediately turned my head away, automatically hiding my face, still in vamp mode, from whoever was outside.  
One of Josef's security guards went to the door, and I could hear him speaking in hushed tones with someone. The rustle of a newspaper under my nose caught my attention and I glanced up as Alexander kindly offered me the newspaper to hide behind. I took it gratefully, peering cautiously over the top to see what was going on.

"Mr Kostan....." The security guard approached Josef. "...... there's a visitor here to see you."

"Alex..... stay with Beth." Josef ordered, getting to his feet. "Do not let her out of your sight for a second. There's blood in the secret compartment at the back of the mini fridge if you need it."

Alexander and I exchanged looks as Josef and the two security guards swiftly exited the room.

Rolling his eyes, Alexander helped himself to another glass of Josef's Scotch. "Not a 'please' or 'thank you' to be had, did you notice? Two minutes older than me and he thinks he has the right to order me around. Nothing ever changes...."

I laughed, able to sympathise with being bossed around by Josef. A subtle change in my vision alerted me to the fact that I'd slipped back into human face and I automatically rubbed my finger over my teeth just to be certain. Sure enough the fangs had disappeared.

I watched Alexander as he swirled his Scotch around in the glass. "I'm sorry..." I apologised. ".......I feel bad being the reason Josef dragged you half way around the world."

He immediately dismissed my apology. "My dear girl, don't apologise ...... this is not your fault. I must admit that I was none too pleased when Jimmy called, but now that I've met you I can honestly say it will be my pleasure to assist with instructing and guiding you."

My ears pricked up at the mention of the nickname. "That's twice you've called Josef 'Jimmy'." I was intrigued. "I thought it was just accidental the first time. Is that his real name?"

"Well... technically it's James, but we always called him Jimmy." His eyes took on a faraway look. "Our older brother, Barnaby, coined the nickname if I recall correctly?"

I sat forward in my chair, eager to know more about Josef's past. "How many of you were there in your family?"

"Six in all. Myself, Jimmy, our two younger sisters, Joyce and Rose. Our older sister Audrey, and of course, Barnaby, who I already mentioned."

"So you and......." I paused, almost about to say Josef. "..... Jimmy .... you're identical twins?"

He grinned, and suddenly the likeness to Josef was startling. "Even our mother couldn't tell the difference sometimes. And we used it to the maximum advantage alright. Oh the fun we used to have....... " His voice trailed off as he shook his head in amusement.

"Do you share the same sire?" I enquired.

He hesitated. "Er..... no. Different sires." He didn't elaborate.

"So how old was Josef when he was turned?" I asked, lapsing back into the more familiar name.

"Oh, now there's a question...." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "....... I think he must have been about twenty-six at the time?"

"Only twenty-six?" I was surprised. "That's the same age as me. I always thought of him as older somehow?"

"Well, technically he's four-hundred and nine." He raised an eyebrow in an exact imitation of Josef's trademark 'duh' look. "So maybe that accounts for it?"

I smiled. "Maybe.."

He grinned, an exact replica of Josef's trademark no teeth smile, and I wondered how on earth I'd missed the resemblance when Alexander first walked in.

"So how about you? How old were you when you were turned?"

As Alexander drew a hesitant breath I realised that my question was probably a little bit on the personal side for someone I'd only just been introduced to. "Sorry..... I didn't mean to..."

He waved off my apology. "No... it's fine.... a reasonable question considering not many vamps get turned at my age." His brown eyes regarded me with a hint of amusement. "I was sixty-eight."

"Wow....." was my articulate response. I'd certainly never seen such a fit looking sixty-eight year old before. "....... I guess you must work out a lot?" As soon as the words left my lips I realised how inappropriate they sounded. I didn't want him to think I was hitting on him.

He grinned, his eyes sparkling with mirth. "Thank you."

I cleared my throat, changing the subject.

"So, um....... did you choose to be turned?"

Alexander's face turned serious again. "Yes...... it was my choice."

"So.... was it like a wife..... girlfriend....... partner?" When he didn't respond I thought of my own circumstances. "Were you dying?"

Ignoring my question he leaned forward, scrutinising me more closely. "Why do I suddenly feel like I'm under interrogation?"

I backed off immediately. "I'm sorry.... I used to be a news reporter." I was genuinely apologetic. "It's habit I guess.."

"A reporter?" He quirked an eyebrow. Now there's an unusual choice of friend for Jimmy.... he's usually very careful to avoid the media." He looked genuinely surprised.

"Well..... I wouldn't really call us 'friends'." I looked down. "Well..... kind of more like acquaintances that just got better acquainted." I looked up into Alexander's confused eyes. "I mean I like Josef.... don't get me wrong..... and I think he likes me....." I gesticulated with my hands, realising I was rambling, ".......but he would never have turned me if it hadn't been for Mick. I did something really stupid..... well at the time it didn't seem stupid......but in hindsight......" The words now seemed to be falling out of my mouth completely unhindered. "I managed to get myself shot, and I think I would have died there on a bathroom floor if Josef hadn't found me. He was just doing his best friend a favour really......" Unaccountably my eyes suddenly started to fill with tears. "And now he's just kind of stuck with me........" My vision was blurring rapidly. "We don't know what happened to Mick......" I started to choke. "..... or even if he's still alive....."

That was it. The floodgates opened, and before I knew it I was blubbering like a small child, heaving great ragged breaths between bouts of sobbing. It was like the whole awful situation had suddenly landed on me like a ton of bricks, and try as I might I couldn't seem to hold back the torrent of emotion pouring forth. I looked up at Alexander through teary eyes to find him staring at me with an appalled look on his face.

I sobbed even harder. "And now you're stuck with me too......." I hung my head and cradled it in my hands, not caring how pathetic I looked.

After several seconds of hard crying, I felt a tentative hand touch my shoulder and begin to pat me soothingly. A handkerchief waved under my nose and I took it gratefully.

"Oh God...... I'm so sorry..... you must think I'm a right idiot." I looked up at Alexander, wiping the tears from my eyes and blowing my nose noisily.

He was looking at me curiously. "Is the bond between you and...Josef....particularly strong?"

"Bond?" I shook my head. "No, as I said, we know each other through Mick, and we get on fine, but that's about it really."

"No, no.... " Frowning he shook his head. "I mean the fledgling/sire bond."

"Fledgling/sire bond?" I was confused. Josef hadn't mentioned any bond. "What do you mean? Why do you ask?"

Alexander looked uneasy. "He's not mentioned the bond?"

"No." I was beginning to get suspicious. I fixed Alexander with a meaningful stare. "Perhaps you could explain it to me?"

Alexander visibly squirmed under my gaze. "Well......um....."

The door opened and Alexander drew a sigh of relief, his look swiftly changing to concern as Helena burst through the door, running up to us and stopping at the side of Alexander’s chair. Her hand rested on her chest as she took in great gulps of air, trying to get her breath back. Alexander and I looked at each other in alarm, then back to Helena as she sank down onto the arm of Alexander’s chair, finally managing to gasp out her words.

“Josef’s been arrested.”

 

To be continued/...................


End file.
